Arnold

Author's Note: Just a short little ficlet I came up with when I was browsing for icons. Funny way to come up with a plot bunny, but it was too cute to resist. The plot is stupid, and the ending is probably very cliché, but I think it's cute.

Disclaimer: I do not own: Harry, Ginny, and Arnold.

Dedication: To my own pets, my adorable dogs who, sadly, are no longer cute little puppies but massive dogs.

Harry Potter admitted it.

He was jealous of Arnold. It's a sad thing to be envious of a Pygmy Puff, but it was the sad truth. And anyways, ten years is much too long for a Pygmy Puff to be living, by Harry's standards.

"But Harry! It's your day off, and Arnold needs a bath! He needs to be clean for Saturday, when everyone comes over for your birthday." Ginny Potter said, delicately handing her beloved pet over to her husband of two years. "Just this once, please? I would give him one myself, but McCauley will skin me alive if I'm late!"

Harry sighed. He new this was going to happen. "Ginny, darling, when we discussed this last night, I told you that I would not be bathing Arnold!"

"But Harry!"

And then she pulled out her secret weapon, her Sad Eyes. "Please? This would mean so much to me…"

"Fine," he agreed. "I'll do it. But that doesn't mean I'll enjoy it."

"Oh thank you!" She exclaimed, hugging him. "I love you," and with that, she disapperated.

'Great.' Harry thought, holding the purple ball of fluff away from him, 'I have to bathe this thing? What was she thinking?' Harry huffed, and set off to their bathroom, preparing himself for the evils in store.

It was two weeks later, and Harry and Ginny were sitting on the couch, reading the paper and a book, respectively.

"Harry?" Ginny said, lazily looking up from her book, "I was thinking about breeding Arnold."

Harry choked on his tea. "Breeding…him…breeding…I…what about breeding me?"

"Yes," she said, ignoring Harry's last words, "He doesn't have much longer, and it would be nice to have some more pygmies' around the house. They are such sweet animals." It was all Harry could take.

Harry was jealous of Arnold. The puff was treated better than him, the hero of the wizarding world, "The Chosen One." Arnold got the majority of Ginny's attention; he was bathed by her, cuddled by her, and generally pampered to the extreme by Ginny. And what did Harry, the man she married get? The chance to share a house with a purple ball of…hair.

"What…why would you want to breed that annoying…thing? He's stupid!"

"Harry!" Ginny gasped, "You cannot talk about Arnold that way!"

"But I don't even have a child and you want to breed some animal you've had since you were in fifth year!"

"So? Arnold is cute!"

"So am I!" Harry exclaimed, throwing down his paper. "I will not be beat by a ball of purple hair! You love me! He's going to be dead soon! I want some attention, I want you to bathe me, and I want you to pamper me!"

"Oh Harry…I love you, I really do. I just wanted to give Arnold something to take care of, because we are going to be busy soon."

"Wait…busy? What are we doing? You aren't hosting another Christmas party, are you?" He said, suspiciously.

"No, silly. We're going to have a baby soon."

Harry might be jealous of a Pygmy Puff, and some might consider that childish, but Ginny Potter thought her husband's reaction to finding out he was going to be a father was far from childish. In fact, she thought it was downright hilarious.

Harry Potter, hero of the wizarding world—twice—top Auror in a century, "The Chosen One," fainted dead away at the news he was going to be a father.

And in a bout of irony, Arnold the Pygmy Puff decided to make Harry's fallen body his new nap location.

Fin