Of Vampire Slayers and berserker staffs

Disclaimer: all major characters belong to Whedon and Marvel™. Everyone else is mine.

Note: this story contains spoilers.

S.H.I.E.L.D. HQ, destination classified

"So why are we here, again?" agent Fitz muttered in his more cross way as the intrepid group of S.H.I.E.L.D. agents ventured forth. "We don't have any supernatural trophies with us this time-"

"The staff?" Ward asked placidly (well, somewhat placidly – he had not fully recovered from the effects of the berserker staff yet, and probably would not for a while). "It's supernatural."

"It is probably not, it is more like an emanating-"

"Fitz – leave it for now," Skye said before Ward could – the securing of the staff by S.H.I.E.L.D. had an unexpected effect on Fitz, for the young man went into a state of semi-denial of the berserker staff's magical nature. "The staff is magic, it is supernatural, and according to the agreement between S.H.I.E.L.D. and the Watchers' Council it gets to inspect first."

"Yeah? Well, when did this agreement occur?" Fitz was not looking for a fight, not exactly, but he was not giving in without a fight either, at least not to Skye.

"Around the time of WWII, actually," the reply came as the team entered the office, but Skye was not the one the answer.

"Ms. Rosenberg! Hello," agent Coulson said cheerfully as he took stock of the redhead and her companion. "Mr. Giles isn't here with you, I see. Is that Ms. Summers?"

"No, I'm Faith LeHane," the other young woman (that was not agent Simmons) replied. "B couldn't be here tonight – there was an emergency on West Coast-"

"In California, you mean?"

"No, Canada. In the province of British Columbia, to be more precise. B's inner mother bear is out and Xander is in doghouse... sorry. Basically, I'm here to assist Red while Giles does other things," Faith replied and fell silent.

"Hm," agent May thoughtfully looked at Faith. "Interesting."

Faith's own eyes narrowed and she shot the older woman a thoughtful look of her own. Suddenly, the air was filled not precisely with killing intent, but with something suspiciously close to it.

"Okay!" Willow said slightly too brightly. "Now can I see that staff, please?"

"It's here already," Ward helpfully replied as he pointed to the now-open case. "See?"

"I most certainly do!" Willow perked up even more, in manner somewhat reminiscent of Fitz and Simmons "Very fascinating, I haven't seen a magical staff in a long while."

"You know how it was made?"

"Well, I'm not sure just how much Asgard processes differ from ours, but yes," Willow said sagely. "It was made from specially treated wood and it had the spell inscribed into it. Basically, it is a one-spell book with a limited – or unlimited – amount of magical charges, if you will. The main difference is that it activates on contact...probably because it was used by Norse warriors, who at that were often not particularly literate or would even had time to read the spell once engaged in war, raid or battle."

"What are you saying, then?" agent Coulson asked with genuine interest.

"The spell came from the outside – i.e. someone inscribed, well, engraved it onto the staff," Willow explained carefully. "A sorcerer, or a wizard, or whoever does it in Asgard – the staff came from Asgard, right?"

"That's classified information but there is no harm in speculation," agent Coulson smiled slightly. "Just don't touch it without gloves... or possibly with them. The results are rather troublesome."

"Hm. I'd say," Faith nodded sagely. "Now if you excuse me-"

Faith did not finish. With a genuine roar something burst from the floor, scattering everyone away from the staff.

This particular 'something' was a drill, mounted mainly on a tank-sized vehicle. "Hello everybody!" came the voice from the machine's speaker. "In the name of Wolfram & Hart we take over the staff's ownership...now!"

"Thanks but no thanks," Faith smiled wanly before anyone else could reply and grabbed the staff herself. Skye later was certain that both the young woman and the Asgard creation glowed with a very faint white aura for a very brief moment – but no one else noticed that. What they did notice, however, was that the staff's runes glowed with a green, rather than red, light as Faith held onto it in face of the charging drill. At such close quarters (to put it lightly) the Vampire Slayer just could not avoid if not the spinning drill bit, then the charging vehicle itself.

Faith did not try to. Instead, she stood in a stance of some sort and smote the behemoth machine. It was not as spectacular as any of Thor's smites, but it worked. The vehicle appeared to implode under Faith's blow, collapsing like an empty tin can in Ward's grasp (a bet with Fitz and a rather embarrassing one too) and falling apart.

In few moments it was all over and Faith was the one left standing. With the berserker staff.

"Faith," Willow said in a careful voice.

"Red," Faith replied in a similar tone. "This is awkward, but some assistance, please?"

"Ah," Willow turned red, but she did come over and helped Faith to release her grip. "Just for the record, the Council isn't like this, really."

"It most certainly is not," Mr. Giles agreed as he emerged from behind the now-defunct vehicle. "We're usually more orderly, but Faith, you see, had a Slayer dream few nights ago."

"And you worked with it?" director Maria Hill asked, as she emerged behind the senior Watcher.

"Yes, director," Mr. Giles nodded calmly. "Prophetic dreams are a part of a Vampire Slayer, contrary to what Mr. Stark believes. We know that he is your friend, but-"

"I know that his methods don't agree with you, but just think them over," director Hill said mildly.

"We have, and we know that he means well, but for some reason he reminds us of Saruman from LotR – and not just us, Emma Frost of the X-Men too," Willow pointed out.

Simmons twitched. As British, it was tacitly assumed that she knew quite a bit about Professor Tolkien's trilogy – she did not. So far, after her latest sojourn in England, she was just starting to read it alongside Fitz, so it was something of a sore point, actually. However, the fact that that twitch caught director Hill's attention was something else.

"And what are you doing here? Agent Coulson, you and your team are dismissed," director Hill said flatly – after that Coulson and the others could only say good-bye and leave. As they did, the last thing they heard (not counting the regretful good-byes from Willow and Faith) were Mr Giles' words:

"No, I don't think that this was sent by W&H – not their style, you see..."

End