Edit(8.5.10): Added some lines to the ones where I couldn't come up with a line.

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

Miss Mary Sue

Hello there Miss Mary Sue,

Do you mind if I kill you?

Surely nobody would care,

Even if you have them in your snare.

Batting eyelashes and puckered red lips,

I'm sure Lenalee wouldn't mind giving you a kick.

Your trick never works on the fierce Kanda.

Even if he's not as smart as a certain panda.

But hey, you're the beautiful Mary Sue,

Kanda will soon get the clue.

Unless he swings the other way,

You'll give it a try another day.

The smart redhead Lavi fell easily to your so called charm and beauty,

Even if it's obvious he thinks Lenalee is a cutie.

You'll do everything to get the apprentice Bookmans' attention,

And shower him with your false affection.

Hello there Miss Mary Sue,

Hope you don't mind that I'll maim you.

Your next target is obviously the sweet Allen Walker,

And became his biggest stalker.

He's got one of the largest martyr complex you'd ever seen.

Still, he's the most loveable character on the screen.

Smart, nice, funny and gentlemanly,

He'll be able to charm anybody.

Let's not forget the fact that's he's hot as hell when angered.

Even if it means you're in great danger.

A well-behaved boy who'll surpass his master's womanizing tendencies,

Without even trying it,

Naturally talented, that's what he is.

He is on top of your beloved pink list,

Just above the poor captured Tyki Mikk.

But thou shall be warned,

Miss Mary Sue.

I'm not saying this out of the blue,

cause everything I say is true.

Allen Walker has a thoroughly loyal secret army,

Each one of them with a charming personality

Loufa, Fou, Road Kamelot and Lenalee Lee,

Will give everything to protect his virginity.

I hope you've read my warning,

For I don't want to get sued by your daddy.

Hello there, Miss Mary Sue,

How many have you already seduced?

One of these days,

Thou shall get AIDS.

Wait it's already happened,

But no one is really saddened.

The girls saw you touch Allens' hands,

Trying to entrap his heart,

With seductive smiles.

Well, you've done it,

Prepare to die, Lady bitch.

I can see his army coming.

With their mouths foaming.

Holy Fuck!

It must suck

To be in your shoes

And eating Lenalee's boots.

Goodbye, Miss Mary Sue,

It's lovely to be rid of you.

This poem randomly popped up when I was browsing quizilla, searching for Edward Elric fanfics, when I suddenly found this story and read the description of the OC. The description made my eye twitch and I said to my mind, 'Hello there, Miss Mary Sue, do you mind if I kill you?' That's where it all started.

You would have thought that I would do this with the FMA characters, but since the sentence with the batting eyelashes, I couldn't think of something that rhymes' with 'lips' except for 'kick' and kicks always lead my thoughts to Lenalee's awesome Dark Boots…

So yeah, hope you enjoyed.