A/N: First of all, just so you know and before someone brings it up, NO, I don't feel sorry for Spencer. Not even a little bit, sorry not sorry :)) Anyway, it was hard to write something that could give justice to this scene because it was...I don't even know how to define it. Ash&Ty keep giving me all the freaking feels, despite all the shit we had to watch in this awful 6b. Thank God there was this moment. I actually teared up a little while watching it :) So, nothing, happy reading! I hope it's not too bad, let me know :)
"I never stopped loving you."
There it is.
She said it, she said it out loud.
She finally told him.
She knows it's not fair, she knows he is with someone, she knows she is with someone, someone who's supposed to be marrying soon. She knows that. But now she feels in danger, she feels like she might die, and she knows this is the only moment to let him know the truth.
For all these years, he's thought she had chosen her carreer over him, but it's not like that. She had made a mistake, probably the biggest of her life, then she had realized her mistake and ran back to him, but it was too late.
He was gone.
She was ready to drop everything for him, but he wasn't there anymore.
And that wouldn't be just a stupid fight. Because yes, they had already fought because of her job, plenty of times. But everytime, when she came back late at night and found him in their bed waiting up for her, she knew she could slip under the blankets and cuddle up to him, because he was always ready to wrap his arm around her body and kiss her forehead, like nothing had happened.
But this time was different. He was too sick and tired of the whole days her job was keeping to steal from them, that was the last straw.
This time he wasn't home waiting for her.
He was really gone.
And Hanna couldn't blame anyone but herself for that.
So she had tried to move on. She had found a sweet and caring guy, Jordan. She was basically building the life of her dreams, the life she wanted since she was a kid. Working in the fashion business, married to a handsome man with her same passion, living in a big house in New York... Everything sounded perfect.
But it wasn't perfect at all. Something was missing. Someone was missing. However, Hanna thought she could do this because she was never going to see Caleb again.
But, somehow, life always brings them back to each other.
And from the day he had walked in her hotel room three years after their break-up in New York, she knew the 'life of her dreams' was nothing but a huge lie.
A lot happened from that day. Hanna had tried with all of herself to bury her true feelings, to convince herself that what she felt for Caleb was just a connection because he was her first love, nothing more than that. She had really tried.
But as the days went by and as she watched him smile at someone else, she knew that she was just lying to herself.
This could be the last chance to tell him the truth, and he deserves to know. He's never let her down, he's always been fair to her, so she wanted to be honest with him right now.
That's why she found the guts to speak up. She never stopped loving him, that's the truth. And by the way he's looking at her right now, in a matter of seconds she understands that he never did either.
She knows that what she and Caleb had is nothing they will ever have with Spencer, Jordan or whatever other person in the world. What she and Caleb had only happens once in a lifetime, if it happens at all. They were lucky to find each other to make it happen and live that, and nothing will ever cancel any of that. Their love wasn't just a high school crush, it wasn't just a fly, it wasn't an illusion or anything like that.
Their love was pure love, and love doesn't just go away.
Sure, they've hurt each other in the last period, even if probably unconsciously. Being adults now, they got to hurt each other more than when they were teenagers. She was ready to start a life with another man, he had started dating her bestfriend. But the truth was that her engagement ring stabbed him everytime he saw it, and the looks he gave her bestfriend simply killed her.
But both of them thought that it was good like that.
There was this part of Hanna which wasn't ready to let Caleb go, that didn't want him to be just a part of her past. But then there was this other part of herself, which was telling her that it was better like that. What she and Caleb had had was one of the best things she had ever lived, and ending it for good seemed fair, because it was one of her best memories. A beautiful, pure, passionate love. His memory would never die, nothing would ever cancel it, but Jordan was there now, he loved her, he would give her a happy life.
And Caleb was kind of feeling the same way. It was clear that Hanna had meant so much to him, so it wasn't exactly easy letting her go accepting that, officially starting from the day of her wedding, she would start building a life with someone else. But he knew it was life. All good things came to and end. He thought that, that night in New York, she had chosen her job and broken up with him for good, so he had just told himself to respect her choice. And then he had tried to move on too, searching for some comfort from someone who reminded him so much of the beautiful blonde who had held his hand for years.
They were ready to let each other go only because they thought that the other was happy without them.
But they were wrong, so wrong.
They're definitely not ready to let each other go, because none of them is truly happy with what they have. Because they don't have each other.
And now everything looks so clear.
It looks clear when Hanna admits her feelings, looking straight into his chocolate eyes with fat tears blurring her sight. That's all Caleb needed to hear. He could swear his heart skipped a beat in that moment.
He watches as she shyly hides her face from him, hoping he hasn't noticed the tears that are now falling from her beautiful big eyes, those same baby blue eyes that had completely stolen his heart when he was sixteen. But he's obviously noticed her tears, plus he knows her like the back of his hand, so even if he hadn't noticed it, he would've known that if she was bending her head down it was because she didn't want to been looked at.
He naturally moves his hand to her face, cupping one of her cheeks and bringing her eyes back into his. She looks so beautiful. Fragile, scared, nervous, maybe a little embarassed, but still so beautiful. But her tears always kill him. He's never stood it when she cried. He slowly moves his thumb over her cheek, catching a tear which was about to roll down her cheek. Her cheek feels soft, warm, exactly like he remembers, even though it's been so long since the last time he touched her angelic face.
She looks up at him. Her tears are still clouding her sight, but she can definitely see the way he's looking at her. She can tell that he would give anything to make her stop crying right now, but this time she just can't stop crying.
It hurts being so close yet so far to each other, it hurts the situation they ended up in, everything hurts.
His hand is still slowly and gently caressing her cheek, a wonderful and familiar feeling that she immediately realizes she's really missed during the last years. Even though she can't stop crying, his touch has something soothing which makes her want him to never stop.
And it doesn't seem like he's going to. He keeps running his thumb across her cheek, wiping her tears away and continuing to look at her. Hanna suddenly notices he's clenching his jaw, something she knows he does only when he's really emotional. And just as she looks back into his eyes, she saw that they've dropped to her lips.
Something clicks inside of her when she saw his eyes on her lips. Something strong. She doesn't know what it is, she only knows that she finds herself doing the same thing. She's looking at his lips too. They're trembling. And that something inside of her suddenly makes her head fall forward. She's closer to him now. Their foreheads are touching.
At that, Caleb brings his eyes back to hers. She's looking at his lips, just like he was doing a second earlier. He doesn't know if he's still breathing or not, he feels like the whole world no longer exists. There are only him and Hanna. Then she looks back into his eyes, and he sees it.
He sees love.
He sees home.
His thumb makes another move across her cheek, still feeling it a little wet because of her tears. He looks at her one more time and she's looking at his lips again, so he looks at hers as well before bringing her eyes back on hers, and she's looking back at him once again.
It's all so slow. It's like they're playing some sort of game of looks, even though it's definitely not the moment to play. In fact, Hanna thinks she might die right now, before their dangerous plan about the big bad even starts. But that would probably be the best way to die.
Suddenly, nothing exists. She feels like she and Caleb are the only ones in the world, which is what he's feeling too. They've like created their own dimension, or maybe they're just back to their own dimension. They're in a place where no one else can get in. A safe place.
Maybe they're not that far from each other, after all.
When his thumb stops moving, she looks one last time into his eyes and sees the same love he saw into hers. And that's enough to make her flutter her eyes shut, keeping that image of love there.
He feels her long damp eyelashes caress his nasal bone as she lowers her eyelids, slightly tickling him, and then he sees her eyes closed. She's only waiting for him. That's when he closes his eyes too.
Their lips are already close, they only need one of the two to join them. Caleb doesn't hesitate and takes the duty himself, blindly closing Hanna's soft lips into his.
It all happens in a matter of seconds, nevertheless it's incredibly, magically slow.
He's finally kissing her, and it feels like these years have never passed. It truly feels like coming home. She still tastes the same, her lips are as soft as he recalls, even her shy yet passionate way of kissing back is just like years earlier.
He instinctively opens his lips and gently pushes his tongue into her mouth, meeting hers. It all comes in a natural way, their gestures are spontaneous. They kiss slowly, in perfect synchrony, carefully taking in all the things they missed about each other, enjoying their little moment of eternity.
Nothing hurts anymore now.
Caleb is blowing her mind. Everytime he kisses her, Hanna always feels her whole body burning and her heart starts racing furiously. Everything is just like when they were sixteen, and she has a feeling that it will never change. The way he makes her feel, his touch, his lips all over hers... It's perfect. She only feels love, everything else doesn't exist.
And Caleb feels like he's doing the most right thing in his whole life, because it's like it's all suddenly okay. No matter the years, the mistakes, the pain, the tears... Everything's okay again as soon as their lips meet.
Yes, they're back home.
They always find their way back to each other, eventually.
How can you call 'mistake' something like that? How could it be wrong?
She never stopped loving him and he never stopped loving her.
Love doesn't just go away.
This is everything that matters.