I had the idea to this little short piece by the song pray for you by the Swon brothers. This is set in the same Universe as dancing in the rain, Jane, Alexey and Alice. But before that happened
Carole hadn't cried
It was three days since she had gotten the call from her colleague. About that Finn was in there and she needed to get in there on an instant. I had been standing right by, and when Carole had made Jane tell her what was going on. I hadn't heard what Jane herself had said from the phone- but I knew it was bad when I saw that light go out in her eyes. As she lowered her hand and the phone, and whispered something about that she had to get to the hospital- NOW!
I was woken up from the memories of those terrible moments when I felt Carole move out of my arms and down onto her pillow. She seemed nervous, and whimpered slightly in her sleep. She'd do this every time she fell asleep, but she still didn't cry.
And I still stood in loss of what to do.
I had tried to think of something I could do. Some whatever words of wisdom that could help Carole in all of this. But I couldn't think of anything, except for a few moments when I had for real been thinking about putting… well, something quite strong in her tea. Maybe it would at least knock her out so she wouldn't have those goddamn nightmares. But that had only made me so angry with myself I poured out everything with alcohol that we had in the house in the sink.
"Dear God help me!"
Silently and carefully, not to wake Carole up I crawled down onto my knees onto the floor. Put my elbows towards the mattress in the dark room and clasped my hands together. It had been a long time since I had prayed last. That would probably have been in high school for some girl that I liked to like me back. But this time it just had to work, it just had to be for real.
"Dear God." I whispered it under my breath not to wake Carole up. "I know that it's been a really long time. That I probably haven't… No, that I haven't lived my life as a good person. But… Please just… just help me to know what to do. Or help Carole, help Carole more. But if you help me to know what to do then I can help her. Well… amen" I crawled onto the bed again and pulled the covers back over me.
And maybe Carole hadn't cried yet. But suddenly, I was forcing myself not to tremble while tears were streaming from my eyes and dropping down onto the pillow.
So, that did not end up as good as I planned it to and is kind of pointless and really sad. Please don't hate me for another piece like this.
Random fact
The fact that in the cover pic you can see a pair of hands in the dark. It's supposed to show that in the middle of the dark, Burt turns to prayer to… try. However- and I'm just making this clear to you. If you do or do not believe in prayers, or do or do not believe in God. It couldn't really bother me less.