Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia: Axis Powers. It belongs to its respectful owners.
Note: This is part of my 100-fic challenge.
Prompt: "Right Now I'm Feeling..."
A/N: This is a short, dialogue-only fic between France and England. I'm paranoid and England has some weird swears.
~Enjoy!~
"... Farfelu."
"Huh?"
"..."
"What was that?"
"..."
"Did you hear something, frog?"
"..."
"What did you just say?"
"... I don't know what you're talking about, Angleterre."
"You said something! Just now..."
"Non, I did not."
"I swear, you just said something! What was it?"
"I didn't say anything, Angleterre."
"Yes, you did! You just said something, I heard you!"
"... Angleterre, I think your old age might be finally catching up with you..."
"Hah-hah, frog; very funny. There's nothing wrong with my hearing."
"I'm not so sure; I think you should probably get your ears checked."
"I'm a bloody country, you idiot! I've been hearing just fine for centuries!"
"I don't think it's very fine if you are hearing voices that are not there..."
"I don't need to get my ears checked! My hearing is perfectly normal; it's your attitude that needs to be checked..."
"So you do not deny hearing the voices!"
"Frog, I DON'T hear any voices!"
"Well, what about your so-called "fairy friends" that just happen to strangely disappear every time I come around to check in your office?"
"You've been spying on me in my office?! France, you bloody pervert!"
"It's my office as well! Besides, it's not like you are getting any work done in there anyways..."
"I only agreed to let you use my office because you were too stupid not to let Prussia and Spain trash your own one! If you hadn't spent all your salary on a stupid gigantic walk-in closet, you would've had enough money to replace it in the first place!"
"That walk-in closet is for my fashion designs! I need all that space so I can keep up my pretense as a regular human. Do you want me to be suspected?!"
"France, you live in a house the size of a bloody mansion! I don't think the addition of a walk-in closet practically the size of my basement will make you any less noticeable!"
"Even still, that's not a good enough reason for you to be going around yelling at me for hearing voices that aren't there!"
"Look, I'm telling you that you definitely said something! We're the only two people in my house right now, so I don't think that anyone else could've said anything unless they're here to deliver my petunias or something! Now, what did you say?"
"Nothing! Angleterre, you're really going crazy over nothing-"
"I'm not crazy! If anything, you're the one who's crazy!"
"Pourquoi? I'm certainly not crazy..."
"Because crazy people don't think they're crazy! They think they're perfectly normal, when in reality they're nuttier than an old fruitcake!"
"Well, I could say very much the same thing about you, Angleterre!"
"For the last time frog, I'm not CRAZY!"
"... If that's what you'd like to hear, then so be it..."
"..."
"..."
"... Oh, for the bleeding love of Earl Grey and all that's dark and mysterious in the world!
You know what, frog? I'm leaving! This living room is driving me crazy! You're driving me crazy! This whole house is driving me crazy!"
England stormed out of the sitting room, shooting daggers at France's unreadable face; mumbling darkly as he gets up and walks away.
"... Angleterre?"
The office door down the hallway slammed shut with a BANG.
"..."
"..."
"Hm..."
"..."
"... "Farfelu"..."
"..."
A soft smirk grew on his face.
"... means "crazy"..."
"..."
"I'm feeling rather "farfelu" myself, Angleterre..."
"... Rather "eccentric", indeed..."
~Fin~
A/N: Short and odd, I'll admit, but this was fun to write. For all those of you who're wondering, the word "farfelu" does mean "eccentric or crazy" in French, in a sense. Thanks for reading! :)