Disclaimer: I'm too young to be Rowling so there is sadly no way Harry Potter is mine…
Placing: The night before Jack is hung at the end of the first movie.
No SLASH! I know there are a lot of stories about those two as lovers – but I have actually never seen something like this and decided that at least one story should be added to the archive that shows them a bit differently…
Third of my PoC-series: after "The Night Before The Gallows" and "The Night Before The Betrayal".
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sSsSsSsSs
THE NIGHT BEFORE THE END
sSs
"I intend to see to it that any man who sails under a pirate flag or wears a pirate brand gets what he deserves:
A short drop and sudden stop!"
sSs
James Norrington was standing in his cabin, looking out into the sea. But while his eyes were tracing the waves, his thoughts were elsewhere entirely.
In his mind, he saw a boy, a boy he had once known and the man James had called "father" for his entire life.
"You need to be brave, son. There are men out there who are savages, and they want to destroy your entire way of life. They are uncivilized, heathen, thieving, filthy pirates, and when I have gone to a final rest, it is you who will carry on the banner of civility and order, and help the Crown and our allies in the East India Trading Company eradicate their slime from the Seven Seas," the memory of his father reminded him.
But it was the hounded look on the boy's face at those words that had captured James attention.
"It's not a memory," he told himself. "It's just an imagination."
The boy with his black hair and unfathomable dark-brown eyes was staring at him, pain hidden on his face and hidden in his demeanour.
"Just an imagination," James whispered to himself.
But even while saying those words, he knew that the expression – the hidden agony, the hidden hurt – on the boy's face was real.
And it had been James who put it there…
"I intend to see to it that any man who sails under a pirate flag or wears a pirate brand gets what he deserves: A short drop and sudden stop!" He had said once to young Elizabeth Swan – and yet, he wondered if it hadn't been those words that in the end had hurt the boy in his memories more than his father ever had.
And his father had been a monster…
"Didn't I tell you to listen to me?"
The pained cry after the swishing sound of the wipe made the little boy hiding in the cupboard cringe.
"I… I'm sorry, Father," the voice of the one person that was everything for the young boy stuttered. "It won't happen again, F…Father."
Again, the swishing sound of the wipe could be heard, but this time around the one being punished didn't cry out.
"It seems like your promises don't mean much considering that it already has happened again!" The angry voice of the father could be heard before again the wipe met soft flesh.
"I… I'm sorry, Father," the other one stuttered. "I try to do better, I promise, Father!"
And the little boy in the cupboard cried silent tears while wishing to have the bravery to step out of the cupboard and to confess that it wasn't his older brother who had destroyed the expensive statue but he, the younger one…
Yes, James had long since admitted to himself, that the man he had called "Father" had been a monster – a monster who hadn't even stopped before his children.
"D… does it hurt much, John?" the little boy whispered, staring in dread at the red that soaked the older ones white shirt.
"It's alright, Lil' Jimmy," the older one assured him. "I had worse."
Then the older one's face got distant.
"Believe me, I had worse…"
James shook himself out of the memories. His eyes fixating on the nearly black looking waves in front of his cabin window. For a moment, he felt trapped – trapped, like he hadn't felt for a long time… since his childhood when he had been trapped with the man he called "Father" in the same house every night and day…
His eyes wandered to the entrance to his cabin – but he didn't see it. Instead he saw the past, instead he saw the chains that held him in place and forced him to stay where he was.
Beckett.
Lord Beckett.
The man who called James "Admiral" and yet, forced him to do his biding.
James closed his eyes, seeing the memory that hounded him as clear as day again.
Summoned by Lord Beckett to receive the sword one Will Turner had once crafted. Summoned – just to listen to Lord Beckett's plan to destroy everything James had ever held dear in his life.
Elizabeth… and her soon to be husband, because as much as James didn't like him, he knew that Elizabeth did.
His uncle – a man James hadn't seen for years, and yet, had never forgotten…
And him.
The one James longed for, the one James wanted to have back more than anything else…
"He's dead," he reminded himself. "Gone. Forever."
Taken from him by the sea for reasons, James still couldn't comprehend…
And yet…
"She brought him back," a voice told him. It was a childish voice, a remnant of a better time, a more innocent time. "Elizabeth brought him back – because that's what she set out to do!"
And James, for all his experience, for all his doubts, believed that voice like a blind had to believe that the grass was green and the sand yellow.
So James stood there and longed for the one he missed, while shuddering at the memory of Lord Beckett swearing his oath to James's missed one's death.
"The Brethren know they face extinction. All that remains is for them to decide where they make their final stance," Lord Beckett had said – and his words took every joy of James's return to the navy and the return of his sword with them like water.
And the only thing James had been able to do, was looking helplessly at Governor Swan who was fearing for his daughter, like James had been fearing for the dead he couldn't believe the death off.
"Will we always be brothers, John?"
"Always, Lil' Jimmy. Always."
"Even if Father hurts you again because of me?"
"Even if you were the one trying to kill me, Lil' Jimmy. There's nothing that would stop me from being your brother – not even death."
James tried to shake that thought.
He might not have killed his brother – but his brother was dead anyway… and James had betrayed him just right before…
That thought led to another discussion, one they had on one of James's own ships and on the way to the Isla de Muerta.
"John," he had said, and the man he had spoken to grimaced.
"It's Jack," he was corrected. "Jack. J. A. C. K. Jack. Savvy?"
"John," James returned and the man groaned again.
But James didn't care. He would never be able to call the other man Jack, so there was no way he would even try to utter that name now…
"Tell me why?" He asked instead and the other man looked up with narrowed eyes.
"Why what, Commodore?" He asked, his expression sharp and a lot less intoxicated than he had looked like just seconds before.
"Why do you help?" James wanted to know. "Why are you acting half-way like a gentleman towards Elizabeth? Why do you -?"
The other man snorted.
"I was never a gentleman to her in any way or form," he denied, but James didn't believe him one second.
"You rescued her when you didn't have to from drowning," he argued. "You didn't even truly try to gain her affection on the isle…"
The next second he felt like being pierced by the other ones eyes.
"You were standing up that cliff she fell from, ready to dive after her, Lil' Jimmy," Jack said, his eyes somber. "Your eyes were following her, wherever she went…"
James eyes narrowed.
"So what?" He asked and the other man shook his head.
"Her heart is Will's," Jack said. "She will never love you like him."
James swallowed at that and looked away.
"I know," he confessed. "But it's nice to dream… even if it's just for a while…"
The other man's hand touched James's cheek.
"I know," he said. "And that's why I never even tried to win her affection. That's why I rescued her."
James looked at him in confusing.
"What -?"
The other man just smiled at him sadly.
"As long as you dream, Lil' Jimmy," he said. "I will uphold that dream for you – even if it means to dive into the ocean to rescue her… even if it means to be something akin to a gentleman…"
James's hand touched the cabin window in front of him.
Elizabeth had been a dream – a dream he had been forced to give up some time ago, now.
And yet, here he was, standing on the cabin window of the ship that held her prisoner…
He had told her she could have his quarters – but she refused, believing him guilty for the death of her father… a death, he hadn't known about until she told him.
Like she didn't know about Lord Beckett's knowledge of the meeting of the Brethren.
A meeting she would go to if she was free.
A meeting the one James craved for – his brother, his beloved older brother – would go to as well.
"John will be there," James whispered to himself. "The Brethren were betrayed and John will be there…"
"It's Jack now, Jimmy," a voice whispered in his memories. "John's dead. You'll have to get used to that."
But Jack was a name that James had never been able to get used to – so to him, John was at the meeting and John was the one without knowledge of the betrayal.
His brother – a man he had lost to death just to get him returned by the woman he had hoped to dream of, by the woman he had hoped to marry – was without knowledge of the danger Lord Beckett was bringing down upon him…
And there was nothing James could do but stand by and watch…
James hated the feeling!
Oh! It was a nightmare!
He barely had back the one he had longed for – just to loose him again to another monster – this time not called "Father" but "Lord Beckett"…
"A nightmare," James whispered to himself. "A dream… and a half-forgotten dream in the brig…"
A dream called Elizabeth.
James looked back out into the night.
It suddenly seemed to him that all his life, he had been balancing on the edge – the edge between the ideals of the navy and his longing to be on the other side.
All his life he had longed for just one man – a man, he was sure, Elizabeth had helped to return from the death…
And yet, here he was, standing at his window – playing admiral like is father.
"Admiral," a voice in his head said.
His brother's voice.
His brother's voice so full of loathing.
"Admiral!"
And then, the memory of the man James had called his brother all his life, returned in full…
"I'm a pirate, Commodore," his brother, now known as Jack Sparrow, stated. "Don't you remember your brother's belief? Never trust a pirate! Don't you remember your uncle's statement? Never trust a pirate! Don't you remember the Admiral's lection? Never trust a pirate!"
And James couldn't forget how his brother had spat the title of their father… the title that was now James's.
"Admiral!"
It was then, that James finally came to a decision he should have come to years ago.
He was no Admiral.
He could not be an Admiral – not if it meant to bear the same title as the monster who had spawned him…
Not if it meant that his brother would be forced to use that title while speaking to James…
James looked up to the night sky.
"I'm sorry that I was an idiot and betrayed you, John," he told it. "I'm sorry that I needed so long to understand what I really need."
For a moment, he stayed silent, before forcing himself to add what he knew would be the result of his decision tonight.
"I'm sorry that I will ensure that you'll hate me after tonight," he told the sky. "But this is the only way to finally do the right thing – to finally do what I should have done years ago."
And with that decision, James decided to say his good-byes to the world.
He closed his eyes, took a deep breath and then turned to leave his cabin.
It was high time to do the right thing.
It was high time to choose the right side… even if it would mean that this would be the last choice he'd ever be able to do…
With that thought, he left his cabin and heeded to the brig.
Tonight would be his last night – and as much as his brother would hate him for it, James knew he would understand…
"As long as you dream, Lil' Jimmy, I will uphold that dream for you – even if it means to dive into the ocean to rescue her… even if it means to be something akin to a gentleman…"
"Please, God," James whispered while entering the brig. "Just let me dream one last time tonight!"
Because as long as he dreamed, his brother would uphold that dream for him and not begrudge him his decisions…
With that thought, James stepped up to the cell to look at the woman he had dreamed about in the past.
"Come with me," he said, begging her – but Elizabeth stayed, her eyes cool and suspicious. "Quickly!"
And when her men left the cell, James couldn't think that he would have to pay for his actions before the night would end.
Before this dream would end…
Yet, he didn't care.
This was his decision.
This was his final stand – and the last thing he would do for the woman he loved and the man he, in a different way, loved even more.
"What are you doing?" She asked him, and for a moment, James couldn't answer.
What was he doing?
He had risked everything – he had destroyed the most important thing in his life, to return to the navy and his job! And yet, here he was, destroying his career without a second thought…
Why?
Why?
WHY?
There was no explanation, no way he could tell her so that she would understand within a second.
Because the truth was, he was dreaming a dream that would never be his – and yet, just for tonight he would dare to dream it and hope that his brother would forgive him for it…
Because, just for a moment… just for a moment, James was back to the dreamer he had been all his life…
For a moment, James was again that little boy safe in the embrace of his big brother after a nightmare.
He was the little boy standing at his window, staring at the sea and praying that John was still alive.
The young boy safe in the arms of his brother after being rescued by his uncle...
He was again the young man on a ship and praying that John was anywhere out there.
The young, future Commodore standing on the walls of Port Royal, looking out towards the sea and praying that he wouldn't meet John any time in the future ever again…
The Commodore, hiding away in the arms of his brother the day before he had to hang him…
And the ex-navy man on the deck of a ship, dreaming about better times…
"If you can't believe in the legend of Capt'n Jack Sparrow, my dear Commodore, then let me assure you, that John Lawrence Edward Norrington doesn't break a promise, savvy?"
No, John Lawrence Edward Norrington didn't break promises – and James Lloyd Alexander Norrington planned to live up to his example at least once in his pathetic life!
"Choosing a side," James said, his eyes dark with the memories of the man he adored more than anybody else – and Elizabeth accepted the answer as if she had believed in him all along.
James wondered what his brother would say…
He shook his head and instead led his one-time-fiancée and her men out and towards the back of the ship.
And while her men fled, she stopped beside him and he couldn't resist to warn her in the hope that the warning would reach the one he believed to be alive again because of her.
He had no evidence.
No reason to believe in his brother's return.
And yet, her eyes had told him everything he had ever wanted to hear about the life of his brother without her even saying a word…
"Do not go to Shipwreck Cove," he told her hurriedly. "Beckett knows of the meeting of the Brethren. I fear there may be a traitor among them."
She just stared at him at that, her eyes cold and distant.
"It's too late to earn my forgiveness," she said and James wanted to laugh at her words.
He wasn't searching her forgiveness.
He had never wanted her forgiveness.
Yes, he loved her – but there were others he loved more.
It was his brother's forgiveness he craved. It was his brothers forgiveness he longed for – and it would be his brother's forgiveness he would achieve by warning them about the traitor…
Because unlike Elizabeth's forgiveness, his brother's was something he could count on without having to beg for it in any way or form.
John was his brother.
And his older brother had always forgiven him – not caring if he betrayed him to his death or if he used him for his goals…
Yet, James still needed to clear up at least one thing that stood between him and the woman before him.
"I had nothing to do with your father's death," he said, needing to clarify if just to ensure his own heart was lightened of that sin, before he added the part he would never have confessed to her if it had been another time or place. "But that does not absolve me of my other sins."
Sins far more grave in his heart than the one she blamed on him.
The betrayal of a brother.
The betrayal of his brother.
The betrayal of the one, he had always longed for as long as he lived…
For a moment, Elizabeth just stared at him – then something in her eyes changed and her gaze turned pleading.
"Come with us," she said.
He could only stare at her, his heart longing to follow her, but his mind telling him that they needed him to ensure their safe escape here on board.
"James, come with me," she begged him and he wanted to follow – oh how he wanted to!
Then, reality came crushing down on them like a icy wave on the unexpecting sailor.
"Who goes there?" A voice asked, pulling James out of the dream he had for a second, back to his duty, back to his truth.
"Go," he told her hurriedly. "I will follow."
He knows he won't, but the dream is still there, is still strong… and he can't stop himself from lying to her and sparing her the truth just for a while.
"You're lying," she says, her eyes marred by knowledge far greater than James hoped she would ever achieve.
Yes, he was lying – but there was nothing else he could do.
This was his decision, his final truth.
He looks at her, but his eyes see the face of a man he had called his brother for all his life, before finally seeing her again.
This was his end. This was his good-bye.
To her.
To him.
To the world itself…
"Our destinies have been entwined, Elizabeth," he tells her – entwined by his brother and her lover, by their crossed paths and opposite decision; entwined a lot more than she will ever know... "But never joined."
He can't resist a kiss.
She's the woman he had seen himself beside her for the rest of his life.
She's the only one that had ever been able to enter his heart except of the one person that had been there since his birth.
She was his siren, his dream and his nightmare.
And she returns the kiss like the siren she is – nearly drowning him in her false promises of happiness.
In the end, he frees himself to return to the harsh reality once more.
"Go, now!" He tells her and watches her flee before the man who had found them rounded the corner.
"Back to your station, sailor," he tells the creature, sword in his hand – but the man doesn't listen.
"No one leaves the ship," he says instead, and James knows that this is his end.
The only other thing he will achieve tonight will be death.
Nevertheless – he tries.
"Stand down," he says. "That's an order."
"That's an order," the man repeats and for a moment it looks like he will be listening – then he looks up again, his eyes hard and cold and with any understanding. "Part of the crew, part of the ship. Part of the crew, part of the ship. Part of the crew…"
"Steady, man!" James tries again.
"Part of the crew, part of the ship!" The man says with wild eyes. "All hands, prisoner escape!"
"Belay that!" James calls while he hears Elizabeth screaming his name.
He looks up just to see her come back and he can't have that… he can't have that!
The message has to reach his brother!
He doesn't think.
He just shoots the rope, ensuring that there's no way for her to return to this ship.
Ensuring, that his brother will get the message…
The sword that pierces him is unexpected and yet, expected as well.
He will die here tonight – but he had known that all along.
This was his decision.
This was his atonement.
For a second, he wonders if his brother will grieve when he hears about James's death – then the world slowly fades.
"The admiral's dead," someone says. Then the creature who's the captain of the ship kneels down in front of him.
"James Norrington," Davy Jones says and James… no, Lil' Jimmy looks at the man who trapped his brother behind death's door. "Do you fear death?"
There's just one answer that Lil' Jimmy has for that – it might not mean much, considering that the creature has no heart… but it's the only one Lil' Jimmy has for it nevertheless.
He pierces the creature with his sword.
The last thing he hears before he fades from the world are Davy Jones words.
"I take that as 'no'."
"You bet," Lil' Jimmy thinks and while his vision blackens, he can see the face of his brother, promising him the one thing Lil' Jimmy craved for all his life…
"I will never hate you, Lil' Jimmy," John said matter-of-factly. "Like you will never hate me, no matter what I do. This is how it is, and this is how it should be. It doesn't matter how often you will betray me, I will never be able to hate you even if I tried."
"Never?" James asked and he hated how much like his child-self he sounded with that desperate question.
"Never," his brother assured him. "Of course, you dying and leaving me alone, feeling like the worthless brother that I am would ensure that I could come close to hating you for leaving me, but I guess I would hate myself even more for not keeping you safe – but truly hating you? No, I don't think I will ever be able to do that."
John would hate him for this.
And yet, John had always protected him.
Lil' Jimmy was sure that his brother would understand that Lil' Jimmy had dared to dream once more.
And John would come back and protect him again from his nightmares and from himself… even if it meant for him to return to death and pull the soul of his little brother out of the after-life…
sSs
"If you can't believe in the legend of Capt'n Jack Sparrow, my dear Commodore, then let me assure you, that John Lawrence Edward Norrington doesn't break a promise, savvy?"
sSs
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Well, this was the next part of my short story series - still following the movies. I'm thinking about going absolutely AU - what do you think?
I hope you liked it.
Ebenbild