Authors note: if the war had gone a little differently, or a lot, i like to imagine one of the things that would change would be neji and here is one of things that i think might have happened if he'd been able to stick around. just me playing with the idea. hope you enjoy
Kami, he had to stop doing this. How had he ended up here again? He knew the answer but it still baffled him occasionally. How had he managed to get so entrenched? He knew the answer to that too.
The problem, or rather the answer, was laying next to him. Her hand was fisted against his chest and her body was flush along his side. One of her legs had crossed over his body to fit snugly between the lower half of his legs. Her face was tucked into the curve of his neck and with every move he made she pull him closer to her. There was little space to speak of yet she managed it somehow. With every breath she took the flat plains of her stomach tickled his side.
Pink hair spilled onto his shoulder and he was hard pressed not to wake her just so he could kiss her again. But he would not. She had an early shift at the hospital tomorrow and she needed her rest especially after the night they'd had.
Just thinking about it made him want her again. He suppressed the groan that threatened to edge its way out of his lips as her breasts brushed against his chest. She was intoxicating, an addiction he just could not kick and he needed to. He so desperately needed to, but he did not want to. He did not even think he could.
She shifted in her sleep and pouty pink lips found their way to his neck. His arm was wrapped around her waist, settled in the curve of her back and instinctively he tightened his grip. She seemed to like that though she had never said. Long eye lashes rested against high cheek bones and he pushed her pink hair away to see her face.
Kami she was beautiful. It was not just on the outside. Sakura was anything but skin deep. It was how he ended up here the first time. Her small apartment had become like a sanctuary to him. This was the place he got to be with her. It was small and elegant rather like she was. The whole house was covered in scrolls and books. Big armchairs were in the living room where he could only imagine she snuggled in to read her books with a cup of tea. He liked to speculate about her life in his late night hours here after she had fallen sleep and he was left to his thoughts.
Her home felt like a home, so unlike the compound he grew up in. But it was not just that. She was his home, he could feel it, though he doubted she had realized it yet. How many times had they stumbled in laughing together or so blind with passion they forgot to lock to the door? He could be himself with her in the confines of this place. He could be vulnerable here, something that he could not be anywhere else. He wanted to be vulnerable with her, more so than he already was. After all, she had seen him at his worst moments and had not judged him.
In that moment when he thought he was going to die, he had been saved at the very last minute by her healing hands. The scar on his back and stomach were the proof that could never be erased. He had been willing to die and so he would have. instead she reached down into the abyss and pulled him back from the brink.
He had been angry at her for a time for taking that freedom from him, yet he could not stay mad. One sharp word from her during her rounds at the hospital had been enough to set him straight again. He could still remember the fire in her eyes as she placed her hands on her hips and pulled him out of his self loathing.
"Never do that again! This life is a gift Hyuuga Neji." At first he thought she was lecturing him, and perhaps she was, but she was truly concerned for him. Then with as much sincerity she extended her hand to him "Thank you for protecting Naruto." With that said she turned on her heal to leave. He hardly knew her then but he got to know her better quickly.
At first he found her agitating, in the sense that he had rarely come across women that were his equal in strength and knowledge unless they were older than him. He found her an anomaly, one that had the unhappy misfortune of being there to show him up when he least needed it. The worst part was that she probably never even realized it was bothering him or that she was doing it. She just had the habit of being around when he was not at his best.
Naturally this brought out an occasional snide comment from him or a jab in her direction. Normally that would have been the end of it but, as it turned out, she gave as good as she got. And that is how they had found themselves shouting at each other in a closet at the hospital before they abruptly erupted into a whirl of wandering hands and searing kisses. Later that night found him almost exactly as he was now, except completely bewildered. Many questions had to be answered after that night but he knew one thing for sure. He wanted to stay and find out what happened.
Except he could not. The ANBU that found him had tracked his signature and ordered him back to the kage tower. He had not had time to explain but off he went on his mission. When he came back he tried to visit her to talk things out but it had been at a bad time. Just out of the shower, the towel she had used to cover herself showed just enough to leave him hungry and he was not the only one. He was not quite sure how but from that moment on they had formed a habit. Somehow or other they would find each other and he would leave in the mornings before her alarm went off. And he hated the ending. He hated leaving, but he knew why he did it.
He did not want to loose what they had, even though it was not everything he wanted it to be. The trouble was that he was fairly positive she liked it just the way it was. She was devoted to Sasuke, always had been. Everyone knew it, and after she asked to leave with the Uchiha they all knew where she stood.
Why? He did not understand how someone so intelligent was stuck in such a rut. The Uchiha was not coming back, which was something everyone but her seemed to accept. Naruto had let the man go, happy to let the brooding jackass wander aimlessly until the cows came home.
He brushed her cheek with his hand and left a lingering kiss there. No, the truly ridiculous one was him. It was insanity, pure insanity, to love a woman that openly loved another but he could not help it. He did, and rather than stop loving her he wanted her to return the feeling. His chest ached at the thought. Why could she not see what was right in front of her?
Life was not fair, he had come to find. It was one of the first revelations he had encountered as a child, but this was not something he was going to lay down for anymore. It as time for him to get what he wanted, fair or other wise. As hard as it was, he could not play second fiddle to anyone else. He wanted her, all of her, to himself. He admitted it was selfish endeavor. He should have been content just being with her. As much as he enjoyed their time, and he did enjoy it greatly, it was time to move forward.
He wanted to hold her hand in the park. He wanted to introduce her as his partner. He wanted to take her out to dinner. Was it a crime to want to want to kiss the woman you loved in the light of day? He did not think so. He certainly did not think it was a crime to want to be with her without hiding it.
A little sigh left her and he could not help but kiss her brow where that little wrinkle appeared when she was concentrating on something particularly difficult. "Neji..." The noise, barely a whisper made his heart soar and that was when he made up his mind.
Kami save him. It as going to be a hard few weeks but he was going to stand his ground. If all went as he hoped he be where he wanted to be in three weeks or he would be alone in the compound again... A gamble to be sure but one, he hoped, where the odds were stacked in his favor. He did not even think about what he was willing to do if they were not, but they would come to that later.
"Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep-" Her hand reached out to slap the alarm silent, but it had the opposite effect. Still ringing, the annoying buzzer had fallen behind her side table and sent vibrations through her furniture. She definitely could not sleep through that.
With a groan she hauled herself over to the bed side and dug about for the infernal object. She blew her hair away from her face and felt about some more. The first thing that hit her hand was not the alarm clock but rather a small piece of paper. Curious, she placed it back on the night stand for further inspection later.
Right now the alarm clock was her first point of call. She had set it particularly early for a very good reason. She wanted to catch him before he left.
It had become a habit she supposed and at first she had not really minded that much. Well, she had, but when she went into the kage's office for an early morning meeting and found that ANBU Team Eagle had been called out for a mission at the wee hours she forgave him. And the whole matter was completely forgotten when he showed up at her doorstep a week later upon his return. He had not said anything and neither had she. Instead they settled into a routine that had been working just fine for her until recently.
Something somewhere had changed and she was not quite sure what it was. That was not entirely true. She knew when it changed for her. Typically after they had spent themselves she would fall asleep. She assumed he did too because the sheets were always warm when she woke up the next day. One night she was woken by a particularly big shift. His arm had fallen asleep and it was not hard to see why. She was wrapped around him, holding on for dear life and he did not seem to mind. If anything he was trying to make her more comfortable. So she pretended to sleep while he adjusted himself as quickly as possible and was shocked when he left a chaste but lingering kiss on the corner of her mouth.
The affection in it took her off guard, but she was pleased. The more she thought about it she should not have been surprised. He was many things but gentle would not have been one to spring to mind had someone asked her before all this. Now it would be the word that came to mind. In the heat of their love making he was not always gentle, and she quite liked that, but he was never too rough. He always took his ques from her and the underlying note was always care. But perhaps she had misread it or even misunderstood completely. Perhaps the care came from an overriding affection that stemmed deeper than she originally thought.
And it had not been a fluke. She had witnessed such displays more than a few times now. What she did not understand is why he kept leaving so early in the morning. So she had gone about trying to wake up before him but the damn man always beat her to it. She had half a mind just to stay up the whole night next time.
Her finger finally hit the snooze button and she was able to set herself back on the bed. It had become a habit of hers to take the five minutes until the next round of alarms went off and rest. In the morning his scent would linger on her sheets and it was comforting. The smell of fresh grass and pine was not one she would have expected to like so much, but she did and it brought a calm to her early morning routine.
Sakura reached over to pick up the note, or so she assumed it was a note. It was and for a second she marveled at the hand writing, pristine and elegant. It was not very long, just a couple of lines, but she appreciated the gesture.
Left for a mission in Rain. I will be back soon. -N
She liked it. The note sent a warm feeling through her body, one that he was bringing about in her more and more often. In fact that heat in her chest and belly happened every time she thought about him. She had thought it was just lust, which there was certainly an element of that there, but now something decidedly more concrete had mingled in. In fact the affection had long since begun to take over.
She was perfectly happy with it, more than happy actually. She had never seen their relationship as anything less than that; a relationship, albeit a very low key one. She was thrilled to find that he was starting to see things that way too. Now she just wanted to take it a step further. She wanted to tell him how she felt, though she was not quite sure how to describe it accurately.
Love? Perhaps. She would not use that word until she was absolutely sure. The last time she had used that word it had gone so very badly and this was so different to the love she had experienced so far. Unrequited, immature, and decidedly lacking in affection, her love for Sasuke was hardly what she would describe as fleeting but it was not what she wanted. That love had always made her feel sad, unappreciated, and self conscious.
This was wholly different. She felt anything but negativity when she was with Neji. He made sure of that. Hell, he had even begun to joke with her in recent months. And as for affection, he gave that in abundance, especially for a man that expressed himself so rarely. Maybe that was another reason she had been so patient. She knew he struggled with emotional expressions.
She gazed at the note before placing it carefully out of her alarm clocks normal resting place.
Now more so than before she was determined that he was going to get that breakfast. Or maybe dinner... either way he was coming over so she could sit down and have a meal with him. Of that much she was certain. Nothing was going to get in her way, not even that niggling voice in the back of her head that tried to poke holes in her confidence. She was finally going to tell him what she wanted.
With a nod to herself she rolled away from his side of the bed and stared at the ceiling for a moment. She had something else to do today. A surgery maybe? That must have been it. Anyway that was not for a while yet and she could head back to sleep for a time. Then she remembered that she had not actually turned it off. It was still ticking away behind her side table ready to set off at any second.
Sakura glared at the empty space. She was going to have to get it soon or else-
"Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep"
He had to be back. In fact she knew he was because she had seen Lee racing through the streets a few nights before and Team Eagle was back on the inactive list. He was not injured, if he had been she would know and he had not fallen in battle because then they would all know. No, he was definitely back, but she had not seen him. She had seen signs of him. He had stopped by her house when she was at the hospital she knew that for sure. Her neighbor had told her a tall Hyuuga had been looking for her. There were a few tall Hyuuga's about, but only one that would be looking to find her at her house. The note she found only cemented the fact it was Neji.
Notes; she had plenty of those now. Always short and to the point he promised to see her soon but she never saw him. She had been waiting for days now but he had not shown up, which was unlike him. Typically he came to her first and then she would see him again within the week. If he not did not stop by the first night, then the second one for sure. He did have clan matters to attend to after all. But three night was unheard of and she did not like it. She did not like it one bit.
The more notes she received the more she was beginning to think he did not want to find her. He could see where she was if he just looked for her. So she was beginning to wonder. There was the possibility of bad timing but she could not be sure of that. Either way the notes he left behind were proof enough for her that he wanted to see her but could not for some reason. That troubled her greatly.
And so here she was tracking him down. He was not terribly hard to find. She had a few guesses up her sleeves and while the Hyuuga compound had been wrong, the training grounds it seemed was right. There he was finishing up a session with his team. Lee spotted her first as she walked up to the shady spot under the large oak tree on training ground four.
"Sakura-san!" he called, drawing Neji's attention to her and she was shocked to find a look of panic in his gaze. Had he actually been avoiding her? She was not sure, but her gut wrenched at the thought. "How are you on this fine day Sakura-san?" Konoha's green beast ran up to her with a wide grin and a bounce in his step.
She smiled back, with significantly less excitement, keeping an eye on Neji the whole time. "I have been better Lee-san." Hyuuga eyes locked with hers and she could see conflict there. Over what, she wondered. He was fighting himself and she wanted to know why. To anyone else he looked as he always did, but she could see and it left a lump in her throat.
"Well, there is no better cure for a bad day then some training," Lee said quite seriously and she saw an opening.
"You might be right Lee-san. Neji-san, will you spar with me a bit?" Lee was disappointed, probably hoping for some more training time or some time alone with her, but he quickly shook it off. Nothing kept him down for long and of that she was quite jealous.
Neji hesitated briefly taking in the glances he was getting from her and eventually let out a small grunt. "Hn."
She took that as him agreeing and immediately began attacking him, not to her full capabilities of course. If she did that the training grounds would be destroyed. Having agreed to it or not Neji fell into his battle stance to ward off the onslaught of playful punches sent his way. It took a few minutes, but one by one their comrades left, off to handle other business until only Lee remained, staring wide eyed at the spectacle. It was not ideal to have him there but Sakura knew he meant no harm and he did not realize that he was hindering her purpose. Most likely, Lee just wanted to view Neji fighting to get another idea as to how he might beat his self proclaimed rival in combat. Neji blocked a punch to the face and Sakura dodged the jab aimed at her stomach. The kick to his shin grazed him and he did not block her from getting close.
A shout form near by distracted Lee as the man in green greeted some genins headed to training ground 5. When his back was turned completely so she took her opportunity.
"I missed you," she said, only to be cut off by his lips. It lasted only a second, hardly enough to satiate her, but she welcomed the affection openly.
Pearly eyes drew close to her green ones in question. "You missed me?" he asked in a mix of pride and disbelief. He put the emphasis on the last word and it puzzled her.
Of course she missed him. Did he not know that? "Yes, you," she said pulling back a little to get a good look at his face. She searched his visage but he was hiding something very well, so she continued, "You as in Hyuuga Neji, the man I-" His eyes began to brighten and soften at the same time but then a sound had them both quickly pull apart as Lee turned back around to watch the fight.
"Yosh! I missed it? Who won?" He asked, large black eyes flitted between the two nins curiously. Neji took a step back and folded his arms over his chest.
Sakura wanted to let out an exasperated sigh but did not. That impenetrable mask was back on and he would not be putting it down now that Lee was watching them. It drove her crazy when he did that, but he had a reason and he was too stubborn to be talked out of it once he made up his mind. He had come to a decision, and she had a feeling it had something to do with her.
Realizing he would not be telling her what it was today she took a step back. "Neji won," she announced with a sad smile and Lee in his usual manner went about trying to cheer her up.
Lee nodded in solidarity, having been on the receiving end of such a loss one too many times. "We should train Sakura-san so that next time you will beat him," he announced with a sparkly grin and a thumbs up just as his mentor would have done.
"Maybe later Lee-san. I promised Naruto I would have lunch with him." The green clad man bolted ahead in the direction of Ichiraku's, shouting about a lunch with his dearest friend. She moved to follow when a hand grasped her wrist and spun her around.
"This doesn't suit you," he said with a hand lightly placed under her chin. His thumb grazed her lips as if he were trying to get rid of the downturn that had settled there. When that did not have the desired effect she felt his lips press against the corner of her mouth in the same way he had done so many late nights before. "I have to go, but I will see you soon," he promised fervently. His guard was down and she saw the longing in his eyes. She nodded unable to say anything and he turned to head to the Hyuuga compound.
"Neji, next time-" The distinct pop as his name left her lips was disappointing but ultimately he had accomplished his goal. Her smile was back and her heart was beating a mile a minute. "could we go out?" she finished with a shake of her head. She would bring it up again the next time she saw him.
"Lee-san, wait up!" she called out, fairly positive that the hyperactive nin was already sitting at the stand waiting for her.
Neji let out a tired sigh. His relaxing shower had not turned out to be so relaxing. She was on his mind. She had been since this all started and admittedly he liked it that way. In moments like these, which had been reoccurring over the last week, he wanted to give in. He wanted to march over to her apartment and forget all about his cause.
It was even worse when he saw that look in her eyes. Hurt and confusion were not things he wanted to see from her. If she was hurting so was he. Neji could hardly bare to stay away, but he had to and he knew it. He was beginning to see it now, her care for him. That as all he had wanted but he need to hear it. He needed to feel it.
And there was that nagging thought in the back of his head that reminded him she might have only missed the sex. Not to say he did not miss that. He did. Cold showers had become a regular occurrence for him these days, but he thought of it as a necessary evil. Would she still miss him if sex was not the focus? Or would she find someone else?
That thought had plagued him for days. What happened to him if that was all this was? Were that to be the case he supposed it was better to be with her than without her but he would cross that bridge if the situation demanded it. He still had the hope that things would work out.
He knew this was somewhat childish and he was not acting like the gentleman he was, but he knew of no other way he could manage to get his point across to her. That was a lie. He could think of a few ways one of which he should have implemented from the start. That would involve speaking to her directly about it and he feared what would happen if he did and she had not come to feel as he had.
Fear. It was the bane of his existence. A weakness that had to be stamped out. This particular fear was most daunting but weakness on any scale was unacceptable. That was what he had been taught as a child and he believed that to this day. According to Hyuuga teachings the best way to get rid of that fear was to approach it directly. The crotchety old Hyuugas might have been correct in this instance.
He let out another long haggard sigh. He could not keep this up much longer. Maybe now was the time to speak to her.
"Neji-nii-san! You have an assignment! ANBU is waiting to escort you." The shrill shout of Hanabi from the hall slumped his shoulders. That was the last thing he needed to hear right now. Grumpy and still sopping wet he threw on a towel and trudged out to the door. He slid it open a crack and a small pale hand shoved a folded piece of paper through the opening. She was gone after he took it but he was not trilled by the scribbled instruction.
Fantastic... he thought to himself, sarcasm dripping through his own thoughts. The Hokage wanted what? The folded paper contained a surprising amount. He was to completely re-file the mission records which had fallen out of date and she wanted it done as quickly as possible. There was a discrepancy to rectify, one of the utmost importance. That would take the better part of a week, possibly two, rifling through the records section to sort this out. And he was under strict command to only take breaks for food and sleep. And he had the distinct suspicion that the ANBU member would not be leaving his side until it was done.
Surely this is what Shikamaru was around for? Neji hardly thought of himself as the first point of call for such a task but perhaps there was a reason for it. The note, unlike the typical mission scrolls, was written hurriedly and he got the impression he had not been the first nin that came to Tsunades mind for this mission. In that there was some appreciation, though he hardly found it conducive for accomplishing his new found goal.
With a growl he went about getting dressed. The sooner he finished with this, the sooner he could speak to Sakura and this hell he had thrown them both in would be over.
This was unacceptable. Three weeks! She was not shouting now but she sure as hell had been earlier. She had shouted at her fridge, into her pillow, and at some poor unfortunate nurse in the hospital. Three Kami forsaken weeks since Neji had left that note on her bedside and it was starting to drive her insane. Not to mention how hurtful it was. She missed him more than she cared to admit.
She was sick of it. The game was well past being old. She had cornered him a few times now, trying to keep things quiet as he preferred it, but he kept insisting he had to go and then promising he would see her soon. And he did see her when she bothered to track him down.
Which is how the grand majority of Konoha had found her walking, or rather stalking, down the street on market day. She was pissed off and anyone that saw her knew it. A dark aura surrounded her and all that crossed her path quickly dodged out of her way.
She was seething. He was ignoring her, avoiding her and she loathed it. The feeling it brought forth was nothing less than excruciating and she had been forced to admit what she had been holding off saying for ages. She loved him, and if he thought that he was going to get to walk away now he was sorely mistaken. She had no intention of being ignored or put off any longer.
At the very least she expected him to face her and tell her why he was going out of his way to push her aside. She was starting to get the feeling he did not want to see her. In the intervals between the meetings that feeling would grow but then she saw his face and looked into his eyes. The want was there and it soothed her worries but then the waiting ate away at her confidence.
At first she had made excuses. Soon could have meant in the next few weeks, but the next few weeks was not good enough for her.
Surely he felt the same way? At least she hoped he did, but evidence was mounting to prove the opposite. And in the last week that hurt had turned to anger until finally she was scouring the city for him. Citizens of Konoha were scampering away from the usually friendly medic in droves. She walked past the library and found a familiar chakra signature.
Heaven help them she could hardly contain herself and that was rarely a good thing. She stomped over to the double doors leaving indentations in the ground where heels were digging in. The doors slammed open and immediately all eyes were one her expect for one pair. He had probably seen her coming a mile away.
That reminder made her sniff back an emotional flood that was about to burst and instead she channeled it, or she tried to. The second her eyes laid on him she calmed down a bit, murderous intent dissipating into normal anger. That was still nothing to shake a stick at, but at least she would not hurt anyone in the process of getting her point across. He was going to speak to her properly today, damn it, right there in the library.
He was not going to use any excuses nor was he going to disappear on her. Not this time. She was not having it.
"Hyuuga Neji!" she shouted waving off the crotchety old librarian that she knew quite well. The woman glared over her spectacles as she shushed Sakura, who paid her no mind at all. Even she knew better than to get in Sakura or Tsunades when when either was on a rampage. Sakura stormed down the isles to the pearly gaze that had turned in her direction.
An ANBU member hestiantly stepped in her way only to then step aside once more and fade into the background. She stopped before Neji and stood with her hands on her hips. "Why are you avoiding me?" she demanded staring him down intensely. He was a full head taller than her, so she had to tilt her head up to see his face clearly. Still she made an intimidating figure, which was a fact no one would argue.
"Hn."
She grabbed the scroll from his hand and set it down forcefully onto the shelf which collapsed under her strength. "Don't 'hn' me. You're avoiding me and I want to know why."
He looked around to the crowd they were gathering, each one interested in the spectacle and all wondering what he had done to earn such a declaration from the hokage's apprentice. "Sakura-" he began carefully, taking into account the number of onlookers only to be shut off by the petite woman before him.
She pointed out to the crowd sharply punctuating her words to express the full range of her rage. "I don't give a flying shit about what anyone else has to say, so tell me now. Why are you avoiding me?"
His jaw set and in a flurry of leaves he had dissipated on her again. For a split second her mouth hung open before she let out a sharp exclamation that was not exactly a word. The frustrated shout was followed by her disappearing as well, leaving the spectators to guess at what would happen next.
Neji knew better than to think she would not find him. He had not been trying to hide but the last place he wanted to have that conversation was in the throws of market day in the center of town. This was between them and he did not want any voyeurs if he could help it. It would be a matter of seconds before she appeared next to him and he would be ready.
"How dare you!" she screamed at him. He heard her before he saw her and when he did he was taken aback. "How dare you try to ignore me!" Through the anger tears had begun to stream down her face. He had not been prepared for that. Panic spread through his system and he had no idea what to do.
He took a step toward her wanting to stop the pain, because he now knew that is what had happened. The tranquil setting of the forest behind them was hardly suited for such a set too but it would have to do. They had put this off long enough. He chastised himself for casting the blame on both of them when who knew who it really belonged to. He had put this off long enough. "I am not ignoring you."
"And this was?" she asked shooting her arms out behind her in disbelief referring to the library. She waited for an explanation, her gaze trained on his face with an intensity that he had yet to see directed at him before these last few moments. He had seen intense from her but of a different kind. This version he was not a fan of, mostly because he felt guilty. He was putting her through this emotional torment. He reminded himself why they were both feeling so terrible and why he had brought them to this point in the first place. He had done it because he had felt insecure, a fact he did not particularity enjoy admitting to. He had wanted assurance and instead he had hurt the woman before him. That was despicable in his eyes and he promised himself he would make it up to her when this was all over.
"I want to keep our business between us," he tried to explain calmly but his emotions were beginning to peak out from the edges. His jaw was stiff as his teeth ground together in an attempt to remain steady. He was about to tell her about his most recent assignment but never got the chance.
Her hands came to wipe at her face to get rid of the tears that were coming faster and faster now, blocking her vision. "So your trying to hide me, hm? Save face? Because your too good to be seen with me." His explanation had done very little to calm her down and in the end her statements struck a chord in him.
"You are the one trying to hide me," he whispered in a croak that gave away how he really felt. It made her stop and for a moment there was silence between them as they though over what the other had to say.
She was confused, he could tell, and she sniffed a couple of times thinking over what the had said only to have the frustration of misunderstanding build up. "What are you talking about?" she yelled only to be pinned up against the nearby by tree. His mouth latched onto hers and she reacted as she always did when he touched her. In a frenzy of roving hands and searching lips they both gave in and forgot all about the anger and confusion. He held her hands in his near her head, pinned to the tree trunk. She arched into him wanting to hold on and when he moaned she let out one to match. He felt her legs wrap around his waist pulling his frame further to hers and in an attempt to contain himself he dropped his head to her neck and closed his eyes. He breathed heavily doing his best not to drag her down and take her behind the tree if she was willing. It certainly seemed she was. They would have to wait for that. There was a conflict that needed to be cleared up and so he did his best to slow his raging pulse and steady his breathing.
He felt her kiss the top of his head gently trying to raise his gaze again. He let got go of her hands and braced himself against the sturdy oak trying his best to support her as she was still wrapped around his waist. "I can't do this anymore, Sakura," he said in a whisper and he felt her breath hitch in her chest. Her heart pounded against his ear, erratic and panicked.
She brushed his hair back in an attempt to see his face. "I'm sorry. I know I have a temper but we can talk it out. Just give me a few minutes to calm down," she explained and apologized desperately wanting to fix whatever was broken. She wanted to fix this problem, whatever it was because she did not want to loose him. He could hear it now, but he needed to be absolutely sure.
Black locks shook and he felt her fingers at the sides of his face caressing his skin gently. "No, not that. I cannot be your distraction anymore. I want more than that. I need more." The gravel in his voice, brought on by genuine need, was vulnerable and fully exposed. It took her by surprise.
Sakura tilted her head to the side in confusion. She thought he had brought her out here to fight it out. She had expected to demand what she wanted but instead he was doing the demanding and she was slightly shocked."I don't understand," she breathed out in a haze, unsure of what to think. Her whole perception had just been turned around and she was still trying to catch up. Was he saying what she thought he was? She knew he cared but could it really be that much? She waited hopefully for what his response might be.
She felt the tree shake behind her as his hands dug into the bark and she stroked his jaw in an attempt sooth him. "I love you," he said, tilting his head to the side resting the bridge of his nose on the soft flesh at the top of her collar bone. His eyes were still closed and his breath was shaky, as if he feared rejection. It was in that moment she realized that he had; he had feared her response. Suddenly it all became clear to her but she waited as he continued, not wanting to interrupt him. "I'm not sure when it happened but it did. I want you to love me, more than you love anyone else." His announcement grew in volume so that it was no longer a whisper against her neck but a plea that rumbled from his body to her and through the trees.
She bent down to place her lips as close to his ear as possible. "And who said I didn't?" Finally with that whisper in his ear his head shot up to see gentle green eyes starting back at him. He leaned into her touch as her hand caressed his strong jaw line. "Don't go assuming. You were always the one to leave without saying anything." Her smile screamed how happy she was and her eyes reflected that, but he could also see the worry she had held onto. Had that been there before this had all started and he and just never noticed? He was beginning to suspect that was the case. If so, it was time to put that worry aside once and for all.
Neji leaned back from the tree to allow her to stand but did not pull away. He looked away towards the horizon and did his best to explain. He was not accustomed to explaining himself but he hoped it was being expressed the way he wanted it to be instead of confusing her more. "It was an order the first time, but you seemed to like it that way. I didn't think you wanted me to stay."
Her hands, which had never left his face, gently turned him back towards her with a small sad smile thinking back on how silly they had been. One word from her in the past could have set all of this straight and she decided from that moment on she was going to assert her direct personality a bit more. She wanted no more confusion on either parties part. "Of course I did, but I thought all you wanted was sex."
Sakura felt his chest tighten against hers and she relished in the way his arms wrapped around her back to hold her close. "No, I want you," he said, pulling back to look her in the eyes once more to see how she felt about his declaration.
He was pleased to find the same level of adoration reflected back at him and then smiled when a little finger pocked him in the chest playfully. "Then stop trying to shove me away and let me in," she demanded with a mock frown. Slowly that playful approach faded as she projected a level of seriousness he had only seen a few times before. She laid her hand against his chest and stared up at him with a stern countenance. "You have to talk to me for this to work you know."
He nodded, holding onto the hand that rested against his heart. "I know," he said, watching her attentively. If that was all she asked he could easily manage that with a little help from the woman herself.
She pulled her head back to show that she was serious, pinning him down with a stare that would make most men quake in their boots. "And you have to trust me. Trust me when I say that I don't want to build a life with a man that will run away from me or stay the night only to leave in the morning." She was no longer whispering and that made him feel at ease. She did not care who heard. So much the better because he was going to make sure everyone else knew soon enough. No more late night sneaking about, no more keeping it quiet and never again would he wait until they were alone to hold her hand or kiss her if he wanted to. A weight was lifted off his shoulders in the understanding that they were on the same page and possibly had been for quite a while. He would wait to berate himself for his foolishness later.
"Then why did you let me?" he wondered aloud, truly curious how this had happened if that was not what she wanted. She was not the kind of woman to sit back and not express herself if she was displeased.
She crossed her arms over her chest and raised broth brows at him. "I made an exception because you are so bad at expressing yourself."
"Hn." He had to agree, but that was no longer an issue. He vowed to himself he was not going to let that happen again. He held his arm out to make space for her next to him. If they were walking home on market day, they were going side by side and hand in hand.
She paused looking up at the sky in thought before smiling up at him again. "Although, you did a pretty good job a minute ago," she admitted, tugging him down to plant a gentle kiss on his lips before fitting herself into the space next to him. Her arm snaked around his waist and he could hardly keep from grinning in triumph. "Come on, I've been wanting to make you breakfast for ages."
Neji kissed her hair as they began to walk towards town. Breakfast sounded excellent. After all, they had a great deal to catch up on. "I would like that very much."
Naruto sat up from behind the tree looking bit shaken and more than a little disheveled. "Holy shit. Since when?" he asked the woman next to him who sat up as well running a hand through her long hair to straighten it out a bit.
Hinata watched her cousin walk away with a smile. She was happy for them really. It had taken them long enough to sort this all out. For a while she had thought about interfering and she would have had it taken much longer. She patted her boyfriends hand gently whilst shaking her head a the silliness that abounded from a small misunderstanding. She thought back on when she had first heard the rumors. She began quietly, still nervous around her hyperactive boyfriend but slowly and surely the stuttering was being minimized. "A-A-A while. They seem to think no one else knows b-b-but Ino suspected for ages and I caught him at her place one n-n-night when I was trying to return a book." She waited for the bewilderment to pass his foxy features before she planted a new worry on him. "Now when are you arriving to meet father?"
That one question would occupy Naruto for sometime to come but he felt a little better knowing he was not alone. Eventual Sakura would have to endure the same grueling from the Hyuuga clan lord as he did. And with that in mind he could begin to plan for it, feeling significantly more at ease.
End comments: this story sort of took me for a ride. i had a lot of fun writing this and i hope you had fun reading this. i like to think this would be an accurate portrayal of what would happen if an emotional sakura and a bottled up neji let it all out when they thought no one was looking. anyway, i have a few more in the work to post soon. till next time.