In which home is the only place a heart can ever feel everything.
/
There are lots of definitions for the word "home", but nothing quite suited her or have satisfied her curiosity. There are times where she would long for the familiar warmth of her dead boyfriend's arms around her, but she never demanded it. There's this irreplaceable feeling of that consumes her when she goes back to her apartment; the feeling of want, and hurt, all pressed up in her heavy chest.
Sometimes a pair of arms would hold her whenever she's having one of her nightmares. But to her, it wasn't enough. However, she learned to live with it. Coming home to nothing makes her feel like she's trapped within the four walls of her apartment.
But there was this one day where she came home and his best friend was there, sitting on her couch with a bowl of popcorn and a movie playing in front of him.
"Dick, why are you here?" She asked.
"Is it bad?" He asked, popping a piece of the oily food in his mouth.
"Not really," She answered, "but I can't see the reason for you being here."
Dick chuckled and patted the seat next to him, Artemis' eyebrows are narrowed.
"Of course there's a reason for me to be here. I mean, you're also my best friend. We should stick together after all that has happened." He told her.
It took her aback to hear him saying that. She recognized it as Dick meeting her halfway, a way to move on from the death of Wallace West.
His full name ignites a spark in her veins. Her heart beats a million times faster, but she knows that his name will never lead to his return. He's not coming back no matter how many times she has said his name out loud, or in her mind.
"You're meeting me halfway, aren't you?" She said, sitting beside him, and tucking her leg underneath her.
"It's a good way to start again." He responded, forcing a smile. Artemis knew how fake his smile is. She's been living off those unreal emotions for almost a year, and not once did she actually ever feel something other than being lonely.
Artemis sighed, "We're the only ones not moving forward. I hope you realize that."
"I have, actually." Dick pursed his lips and fixated his gaze back to the TV screen.
And that was when he started coming there more often. They would talk amore about what they feel and what they're about to do once they've finally moved forward with their lives.
She found herself opening up to him more and more. They'd spend their nights on the couch, or in the dining room, talking about what had, and could have been.
What surprised her is that he was always there, listening and comforting her. She believes that she's already met him halfway, and that she's finally getting her old life back…somehow.
(She knows that she'll never be the same without Wally, but it's the closest she can get to actually be healed)
His arms felt warm around her, so warm and comforting. And sometimes, she doesn't even want him to let go. It's the same feeling every time she tells him something, or when they're both talking about how the past had affected them.
It's the only thing she has ever looked for since… Wally.
There's this pang of guilt and torture every time she looks and craves for Richard—freaking—Grayson. One, because he's her dead ex-boyfriend's best friend; Two, because he's two years younger than her; Three is because she's not entirely sure how she really feels.
Dick enters the apartment with a tub of ice cream, walking straight to the kitchen, Artemis had assumed that he went there to chuck the tub into the freezer before eating it. Then, he went back and took a seat next to her on the couch.
"Hey, what's wrong?" He asked
"I don't know what I'm feeling, anymore." She responded bluntly.
"Hey, don't say that. I'll help you figure things out. It's what I'm here for, right?" Ad he pulls her in for a tight hug.
That was when everything made more sense to her. Home is not a place, nor a thing defined by its location. Home is a person. A person where your contentment and happiness resides; where you can feel everything and anything. Home is where your heart would let go of all its troubles and finally give in.
As Dick's arms wrapped around her waist, his head pressed to the crook of her neck; that was when she realized everything.
She's finally home.
/
le notes: With this fanfic, I wanted to explore how people can only feel such things when a certain person comes to their life. At first, it was Wally who made her feel everything. She was never lonely or sad, or whatever when Wally is around. She just feels like her. Like all the comfort in the world is with him, and for me, that is how the word "home" is viewed. But then Wally leaves, and then she just feels like all the world is crashing down on her? Yeah? That's the feeling when you're losing someone you would look at and see all the light in their eyes. It's like they're everything and you're just merely an admirer of what they have. And then Dick meets her halfway, and that was when she was at home again. Oh my God, I'm rambling HAHA. (Forgive me because this is actually somehow equivalent to what I feel most of the time, but that doesn't matter).