Super angsty. Definitely out of character. But I think it's good!

The glass shattered as it hit the hard wood floor. Its contents splashed onto his bare feet. Something about the moment was funny— he laughed. The light flicked on in the kitchen where he stood. Gun pointed at his chest until she registered it was him. He shrugged and gave her a weary smile. She shook her head then turned and walked away. No words spoken— this was becoming their new normal.

When he got back in the bed, she turned her back to him. He reached his arm over to hold her. She pushed it away. They both sighed in frustration. He was mad she kept refusing intimacy. She was mad he was drunk— again. The tension between them was becoming even more thick. Both prolonging the inevitable in their silence. Both afraid that words would only make things worse.

Truthfully, they still loved each other but, lines had been crossed. Vows were broken. They weren't sure what that meant for them. Not after what happened. He made a mistake. She lost trust. It was an assignment, sure, but he didn't have to take it that far. The worst part was that she had to sit and watch him do it. They weren't the same after that. And, as it stood right now, they would never go back to being the same again.

She tried to stifle the sound of her sobs, but it was too hard. He reached over again to try and comfort her. His comfort wasn't what she wanted— she got up. And he just watched as she left their bed. Eventually, he heard the familiar sound of a vase hitting the wall. That's when he got up too. When he made it to the living room, she glared at him through her tears.

"I'm sorry Ziva", he finally spoke as he stepped towards her.

She stepped back, "I know you are Tony. You have said it a million times."

"And I'll say it a million more if it means you'll forgive me", he whispered.

She scoffed and stepped back again when he took another step forward.

"Baby, please, I'm sor..."

"Do NOT say it again!"

He waved his hands in surrender, "Fine. Just come back to bed. Please."

"I will sleep out here", she spoke defiantly.

"Ziva, I don't want to sleep alone."

"Then go back to her bed", she quipped. It stung— both of them.

"This again", he unintentionally chuckled. Of course it was this again. It hadn't stopped being this all week. And he couldn't really blame her for reacting the way that she did. He had changed the play at the last minute. His audible wasn't necessary to get the job done. But, at the time, it seemed like the right call to make to maintain his cover. Ultimately— it may have cost him everything. He sighed, "I only did my job."

"Your job? Tony, that was not your job! I saw the way you looked at her. I saw the way you held her. I saw the way you made love— to her!" The broken look in her eyes ripped his heart out all over again.

He needed another drink. To dull the pain. To wash away his guilt.

She knew what he was thinking and shook her head, "Go ahead. Go get your bottle. Drink some more! It is what you have been doing best!"

"Yeah well, I'd rather be doing you but you won't let me touch you!"

"You think I want you touching me after your hands and your lips were all over her— after your dick was in that bitch?!"

"I was doing my fucking job Ziva! Now stop going on about this shit!"

"Fuck your job and fuck you!"

She started to walk past him. He grabbed her arm. She tried to pull away. He slammed her against the wall. She gasped. He panted. They locked eyes— then locked lips.

"I'm sorry Zi", he whisper again as his lips went to the sweet spot on her neck. "Let me show you."

Her breath hitched in her throat as she mentally berated herself for finally giving in. She had been fighting hard to keep her distance. She still wanted to be mad and make him suffer— but his lips, they were her weakness.

He let out a groan when her nails dug into his back. She moaned as his lips met hers again in passionate fury. Eventually, they needed oxygen. He pulled back slightly. Long enough to pull her nighty over her head. She gasped again when he took her nipple into his mouth. His tongue flicked until it reached its peak, then he did the same to the other. She reached down and rubbed his already hardened member through the thin material of his boxers. The contact eliciting sounds of pleasure from both of them.

He moved back up to her lips. This time, she stopped him. He looked at her confused— she smirked. He watched as she slid down the wall and onto her knees. She pulled down his boxers, releasing his erection. He groaned as her lips wrapped around his head. She took him in completely, then slowly let him back out— and then repeated. His knees got weak when she released him from her mouth again and her tongue ran from the hilt to the tip. She knew exactly what he liked but, right now, he wanted to make this about her.

She let him pull her back up. She let him remove her remaining piece of clothing— that black lace thong. He inhaled her scent. He was intoxicated— again. The best kind of drunk he could be. Drunk off her essence. Her leg moved to his shoulder— better access. He ablidged her silent request as his lips kissed her sweet core. She moaned in heavenly bliss. He lick over folds then his tongue started an assault on her sensitive bud as his pointer and middle fingers slid inside her.

"Yessssss", she breathed out as her hips instinctively rocked to his rhythm.

His free hand gripped her thigh as he grazed his teeth over her throbbing nub.

She hissed as her head dropped down to look at him. His eyes were locked on her. Predatory— that was the only way to describe them. Her breath hitched once more as he added a third finger. "Oh. Fuck!"

He swirled his tongue over her while he pumped his fingers in and out— harder. Just how she loved it. Before long, her head titled back as the wave of release washed over her. He slowed down to let her ride it out.

They weren't done, though. Just as her breathing leveled, he moved her leg off his shoulder and stood. In one swift move, he lifted her up and her legs wrapped around his waist. He slid is painfully hard manhood into her. They both groaned as he began thrusting deep inside her. Calculated and intentional in his movements as he hit her spot every time— it drove her crazy. Yet, she wanted more.

"Harder. Right there", she panted as her hands tangled into his hair. He gave her what she wanted. "Yes! Fuck Tony! Yes!"

He lost control when she finally said his name and pinned her tightly against the wall. His strokes became more irratic. He was close— so was she.

"Cum with me Zi", he instructed before swallowing her moan as he kissed her. Their bodies convulsed at the same time. He exploded in her. She fell over the edge onto him. They both screamed in ecstasy.

Regretfully, they came down from their high after a few more moments. Reality hit as he lowered her so that her feet met the floor. She looked up at him. He still saw her pain— they still weren't okay.

"Zi, I'm..."

She placed her finger on his lips. "You said you wanted to show me. I have not seen anything yet."

"But that..."

"That was mindless fucking. I need to feel loved. Show me you still love me. Prove that I really am the only woman you will ever desire. Make love to me Tony."

He only nodded as he swept her up in his arms and carried her to their bed— to make love.

Be gentle. It's my first time.

xoxo - Londyn