ROYI DRABBLES! I love these things. I don't know what made me think this up oh and I DO NOT OWN FULL METAL ALCHEMIST (though owning Ed would be quiet fun! ). Please do not sue me over this! Enjoy!

"And… that ladies…and…gentle..men, is Colonel Roy…Mustang… hard at work; and drunk…I..migght add." Roy slurred pointing at himself in the mirror. He hated case files. He had a tendency to drink a little too much. "I'lll..beee…going now…goodnight." He mumbled slumping forward on his desk. His head hit it with a thud scattering a few of the papers that were there. Riza walked in at that point and looked sympathetically at the Colonel. I didn't mean for him to stay this long after his shift and work. He usually never listens to me when I tell him to do something. What made him stay tonight? She thought to herself. Roy, truth be told, wasn't all that sloshed. He was actually just trying to entertain himself, (but what Riza doesn't know won't hurt her .)

"Sir. Come on. You need to go to sleep." She said trying to get him to stand up. It was a struggle to get him up on his feet and when she did get him up there she about buckled under his weight.

"I…do not…neeeeddd to go home." He said trying to reach for his glass again. She smacked his hand and yanked him around to face her, which nearly made her fall. "What was that for?" He asked.

"You do not need anything else to drink Colonel Sir. I'm just looking out for your health."

"Good for you Riza," He hiccupped. "but I certainly don't need you to carrrry me to my car. I'm capable of doing it myself."

"I'll bet you are." She settled him in and helped him to his car.

"What's with this? I can drive!" He exclaimed.

"You will not drive home drunk Colonel Sir. I told you I'm looking out for you!" His protests were then silenced by her look.

"Yesshhh ma'mn." He slurred slumping back in the seat. She rolled her eyes. Why am I so nice to him? He needs dire help and fast! This getting drunk every night is not good for his kidneys! She thought to herself. Or even his sex drive She blushed at her slightly perverse thought. Roy turned the radio on and put a cd in the player (don't ask me. LOL. I have no clue how far advanced the technology is. .). "Better watch it Riza Your part is coming up after mine." He said.

Roy : PARTY

shanpen no RAIN

sekushii na LADY

KISS de esukooto

Roy : saa SHOWTIME

koi no MESSAGE

nanoni MOONLIGHT

isshun de kieta

Riza : "ame no hi wa ureshii kedo, noo sankyuu"

Roy : "oo..manukena LONELY MAN"

Riza : "demo sonna tokoro ga kawaii noyo"

Roy : "me ni shizuku ga shimiru"

Roy : ima dakiyosete kono te de

kimi ni hi wo tsuketai nosa

Riza : TONIGHT nijuuyo ji

chotto shai na,

hoshi wo sagasou

Roy : asu no asa sanjuugo ji

kodoku kara,

isshoni CHECK OUT

Riza : "zubunureno, saenai koinu mitai"

Roy : "oo..I KNOW munou"

Riza : "demo itsumo tsuyokunakute ii noyo"

Roy : "hoho shizuku wo nuguu"

Riza : ima dakishimete agetai

mizu wo sasu hiniku na sairen

Riza : "ame no hi wa ureshii kedo, noo sankyuu"

Roy : "oo..manukena LONELY MAN"

Riza : "demo sonna tokoro ga kawaii no yo"

Roy : "me ni shizuku ga shimiru"

Roy&Riza : ima dakiyosete kono te de

kimi ni hi wo tsuketai nosa

Riza rolled her eyes. He was going to pay for tonight. Roy dozed off and Riza began a song of her own.

"I DON'T WANT MY FREEDOM BABE

I won't forget YOUR SMILE

Only air droplets over there WARM & SHINE

A day that changed into an earring, the thought that I told you

BABY AIN'T NO DOUBT ABOUT IT

I'm not regretting it

Connected to the pieces of my shattered chest

I brought my cheek closer to you, I turned my back on time

TAKE ME AS IT BEGAN

By your side, I'm waiting for something that'll be blown here from the

Future…."

She quit singing when Roy stirred. She was pulling up outside his house when he awoke again. As she began to get him out of her car he fell over on top of her.

"What's the matter?" He asked.

"Just get up." She said. His looked down to where his face was eye level with her chest.

"Apples. I like apples." He reached out and put his hand over one of her breasts. She gasped and fell down on top of him again. "You like?" He asked.

"Colonel stop. Please." She begged when he did it to her again. "Not in the street. Wait until your inside." She whispered.

"Aw. Come on."

"NO." She made him stand up again. "Where are your keys?" She asked.

"In my pants."

"Don't make me search you." She groaned knowing she would have to.

"Left; front pocket." He mumbled. She reached in and searched around for them. Once she got them he soberly walked up the sidewalk and into his house. She then proceeded with the usual ritual of helping him into his room and out of his clothes. I'm not drunk. What a fool I am to keep letting her work so hard. She's only doing her job, but she doesn't always need this extra burden. He thought to himself.

"Mmm..." He murmured sniffing at her perfume. She was pulling at his shirt when he pulled her down on top of him and then underneath him. He groaned seeing he lips so within easy reach. Temptation has its prices. He said lowering his lips to her's. She broke from the kiss frustrated and hot.

"Look I can forgive you of this Colonel. I know you're to drunk to understand what you're doing."

"I'm not drunk." He said pulling back the bed covers. The satin sheets slid over her legs. The creamy color looked enticingly nice against her skin. She looked into his eyes and decided that he wasn't drunk after all.

"You asshole." She hissed rolling the two of them over. (I'm listing to something that just makes me want to make Riza into a little cat!) Roy got the shock of his life as she began to finish what the both of them had started.

"What the hell..." He trailed off at the sight of her without her uniform on. She was very naughty. He meant very naughty.

"What? Don't like my underwear?"

"It's not that Riza. Black suits your creamy complexion well, it's just so…"

"So not me?"

"I'd say it's you alright."

"It's me? Well, I guess it'll have to go too." Roy about died and went to heaven when she took off her black laced bra.

"You're killing me." He murmured.

"No. I'm not killing you Roy." She bent to kiss him again. . . .

The next morning Roy woke up holding a very soft body next to him. With that body came memories of the night before. The soft body next to him jolted awake at the feel of his Johnson pressed to her thigh.

"ROY!" She cried out loud. He chuckled and obliged her.

Hours later they were in his living room drinking coffee, curled up, and on his love seat.

"Colonel Sir. Why have you been getting so drunk lately?"

"It's stupid really." He replied taking a drink.

"No Roy. No reason is stupid."

"Hughes Lieutenant Hawkeye. It's because of Hughes."

"Because he died?"

"Yes."

"Then I will be here. I'll be here for you Colonel."

"Thank-you Lieutenant. I could really use someone who will be there. Promise me something Lieutenant."

"Anything Colonel."

"Never let me get drunk again."

"Yes sir." She turned in his arms and kissed him. Their coffee cups dropped to the floor forgotten in the couple's passion.

A/N: Hey! Whatcha think? Drunken Tendencies…He….he….LOL. I liked it. Please R&R!