As much as Paige tried to keep her gaze fixed on the table in front of her she couldn't keep her eyes from wandering to the brunette sitting across the table from her. Worried about freaking Emily out with the staring, she forced herself to look away but still she found that she couldn't keep her eyes fixed on anything else for too long and she inevitably ended up glancing back in Emily's direction. Emily looked positively stunning and not for the first time, Paige mentally cursed herself for being stupid enough to allow the chance of dating Emily Fields to pass her by.
"What?" Emily smiled bashfully, tucking a stray piece of hair behind her ear.
"Nothing." Paige answered guiltily "It's just…nevermind. It's nothing."
"It seems like something." Emily prompted curiously. Paige glanced away from her and Emily tilted her head in an attempt to recapture her gaze "Paige?"
Paige swallowed heavily as her name passed Emily's lips. She forced herself to look up and offer a small smile, determined to stick to her promise of staying in the 'friend zone' despite how much it pained her to do so "It's not important."
"Are you sure?" Emily pressed cautiously "It seemed important. If you have something to say you can just say it."
Paige opened her mouth to reply but she was thankfully distracted from her response by the change of the music flowing through the room "Oh, I love this song." She glanced at Emily and bit her lip unsurely.
"What is it?" Emily asked, noticing the hesitant look.
A fire burns
Water comes
You cool me down
When I'm cold inside
You are warm and bright
Paige licked her lips apprehensively before standing up and offering her hand to Emily. She somehow managed a shaky smile despite her nerves "Dance with me?"
"Oh…I don't know…" Emily stated, looking surprised by the offer. She glanced between Paige's face and her hand apprehensively "Maybe we shouldn't…"
"Please?" Paige requested hopefully "I swear I'll keep my hands above waist level. Scouts honour."
Emily felt her face flush at the statement but chuckled softly "I'm not even going to suggest you weren't a girl scout because I get the impression that you were."
"Guilty." Paige smiled before wiggling her fingers invitingly "One dance? That's all I ask."
You know you are so good for me
With your child's eyes
You are more than you seem
"Fine, but no funny stuff." Emily teased lightly before slipping her hand into Paige's and allowing herself to be tugged towards the dance floor. When they reached it, Paige released Emily's hand. She hesitated for a moment before moving her own hands to Emily's waist and gently tugging her closer.
You see into space
I see in your face
The places you've been
The things you have learned
They sit with you so beautifully
"You seem nervous." Emily noted, placing her hands on Paige's shoulders.
"First time slow dancing with a girl in front of a room full of people." Paige explained. It was only a half lie. She had never slow danced with a girl at all, let alone in front of anyone else but that wasn't the cause of her nervousness. The butterflies in her stomach were solely thanks to the girl she was dancing with.
"Oh…" Emily murmured thoughtfully before a small smile tugged at her lips "I'm proud of you, you know." Paige quirked a questioning eyebrow in response to the statement and Emily quickly explained "For coming out willingly. I'm proud of how far you've come since we…"
"Since I tried to push you back into the closet?" Paige offered self-deprecatingly.
"You didn't do that." Emily disagreed quietly "You weren't ready to be out. I understand that."
Paige sighed and moved her left hand to the small of Emily's back, unconsciously pressing her closer "Yeah…" she desperately wanted to convey her deep regrets but she didn't want to say anything to scare Emily off so she settled for the one word answer.
You know there's no need to hide away
You know I tell the truth
We are just the same
I can feel everything you do
Hear everything you say
Even when you're miles away
Cause I am me, the universe and you
"You keep doing that." Emily noted, giving a light squeeze to the shoulders under her hands.
"Doing what?" Paige asked in confusion.
"You look like you're going to say something to me but then you just shut down. Like you're hiding something from me."
"I guess you know me too well." Paige joked, though her voice didn't quite stray from it's serious tone.
"If you have something to say, you should say it." Emily pointed out earnestly.
Paige paused for a moment, not sure exactly what she wanted to say to girl in front of her. She had so much that she wanted to say that she didn't have a clue as to where to start or what would actually be acceptable to say in their new found friend zone status for that matter "Well, there is something…"
"What is it?" Emily asked, a hint of concern tainting her voice.
Paige took a second or two to gather her courage before looking directly into Emily's eyes "I think you look beautiful tonight." She noticed Emily looked surprised by the seemingly random statement and hurried to explain "I've wanted to tell you that since I first saw you tonight but I thought it would make you uncomfortable. You said I could say anything I wanted though so…"
"No, it's fine." Emily shook her head "I mean…thank you." She flashed Paige a grin "You look positively dashing tonight."
Paige bit her lip to keep herself from grinning like an idiot "Thanks. It's just something I threw together."
"Well it suits you." Emily complimented as she shifted her hands to the back of Paige's neck "I like it."
Paige blushed and glanced away for a moment before her gaze was inevitably drawn back to Emily's.
Just like stars burning bright
Making holes in the night
We are building bridges
You know there's no need to hide away
You know I tell the truth
We are just the same
I can feel everything you do
Hear everything you say
Even when you're miles away
Cause I am me, the universe and you
"You're doing it again." Emily chuckled when she noticed the far off look in Paige's eyes "What are you thinking about?"
"You really don't want to know." Paige murmured. Emily gave her a somewhat shocked look and Paige's eyes widened in surprise "No! I don't mean it like that. It's not like I have sexual thoughts about y…I mean I do but that's not what…"
"You do?" Emily interrupted curiously.
"Oh my God…" Paige flushed brightly and began to pull away "I'm just going to go and hope that the ground swallows me u…"
"Wait a minute." Emily tightened her grip on the other girl and tugged her close "You promised me a full dance. Not half a dance."
Paige hesitated for a moment before returning her hands to Emily's waist "You're not freaked out?"
Emily shook her head "I know that's not what you meant."
"Oh…"
"What did you mean?" Emily asked.
Paige smiled sadly in response to the question "You don't want to know what I'm thinking Em."
Emily was silent for a moment, taking in the sad look on Paige's face "Paige, if things were different, If I didn't…I love Maya and…"
Paige flinched at the decleration of love but nodded nonetheless "It's okay. I understand."
"But I do want you in my life." Emily continued feebly "What you said about us having a connection…you were right. But I don't know what to do about it."
Paige nodded slowly, mulling the situation over in her head.
"I'm sorry." Emily whispered guiltily "I know it's not what you want but my friendship is all I can offer."
"It's okay." Paige smiled weakly, pushing down the ache in her chest "At least I'm not losing you as a friend too, right? And if you're happy with Maya…that's all that matters."
Emily could see the pain in Paige's eyes and she compulsively wrapped her arms around her in a light embrace, another whisper of apology passing her lips. They stayed like that for a moment or two until the embrace loosened. For the most part they stayed in each other's arms as they swayed back and forth in time with the music.
"For now we can pretend like this is it though, can't we?" Paige murmured into Emily's ear "Even if I'm deluding myself I can believe for now that's it just me, you and the universe."
Emily tightened her grip in agreement and closed her eyes as she rested her chin against Paige's shoulder "Yeah. We can do that…for now."
When you're on your own
I'll send you a sign
Just so you know
I am me, the universe and you
THE END.