A/N: This fic takes place about two years after Can you see me...?', and it focused on Taito, and has a little bit of Mira. Also, the first part is all the thoughts of the Digidestined as the realize that Taichi died. No, I'm not labeling them, because... well, I'm sure you could figure it out! Besides, it's fun to try and see who is thinking what.
If you hide the truth...
I know I shouldn't... but I must. I hate it here... no one... no one knows the truth....
Goodbye, my friends....
***
Silence
***
No...
***
Taichi... was it true? Is Taichi really dead? Did he... could he have...? No...
***
Why, though? Why would Taichi do something like that? He was the leader. He was the one who always held us together... why, Taichi? Why?
***
Isn't that illegal or something? Don't you, like, need permission from a doctor or a parent or something to die? But... I mean, we can't die!
***
He can't be dead! He just can't!
***
I feel so alone now... there's no one to fight with, anymore... Fighting...
Taichi?! Did you kill yourself because we always were fighting? Taichi, please! Why did you do that? I... I...
I didn't mean to hurt you, Taichi.
***
........
***
Oniichan! Why? You... you were my brother, you said you'd always protect me!
But... you died. You destroyed yourself.
***
Poor Yamato... Hikari... Taichi, why did you hurt them like this? Sora and Mimi are crying, Hikari and Yamato are practically going nuts. Jyou is trying to look after everyone, and Koushiro's just sitting there, off in his own world, but he doesn't even have his laptop out.
And me? I, Takeru?
I'm angry, Taichi. How could you do this to us?
***
Taichi... gomen nasai.... GOMEN NASAI!
***
Aren't we suppose to be like, super heroes or something? Like, you know, unable to die? I thought that we were strong... But Taichi didn't get killed...
He killed himself.
***
I should have seen this coming. Taichi had been so quiet and depressed... I should have known that he would do that, that he would hurt himself... I'm the Crest of Knowledge, right? I should have seen this coming...
***
.........
***
I hate crying. It makes me feel so weak... Taichi, you were the only person that I've ever cried in front of.... the only one I trusted. Remember that? On that mountain with Frigimon and Mojimon?
I loved you, Taichi, so why did you have to leave?
***
My best friend... he's dead. I'm sitting here, hugging Mimi as tight as I can, and she is hugging me back. Mimi and I love each other... Sora and Mimi, Mimi and Sora, everything's good now...
But the tears keep coming... oh, Taichi, why? Why did you kill yourself? Didn't you know that Yamato loved you with his whole heart?
No, of course you didn't. He never had enough courage to tell you.
***
I feel responsible. Why shouldn't I? Taichi died, and I, the bearer of reliability, could not help him. Why hadn't Taichi talked to me? Why did Taichi think that everyone hated him?
I don't know.
***
Oniichan... I hope... that you are happy with your choice... I feel so torn up inside, like a piece of me is missing. Taichi, I loved you because you were the best brother ever... why did you leave?
You said you'd always be there for me.
***
I'm so angry! Your hurting everyone! Why did you do this, Taichi? Why couldn't you just talk to us!
You didn't have to commit suicide to get us to understand.
***
Can't think... my brain feels so numb inside... Taichi... oh, Taichi, I loved you. Why could I never tell you?
I was afraid. And look what that got me. Now, you're... dead.
***
.........
***
This is so, like, not funny. The tears just keep coming down my cheeks, and I feel broken. Even as I'm comforting Sora, petting her soft hair as her head rests in my lap, I can't feel... I just... am... confused.
Taichi, you were our leader. Are you saying that we should kill ourselves, too?
***
I can't help but feel responsible. Nothing can fix this. I could go on my laptop for five years, and Taichi would still be dead. This isn't right.
Suicide just shouldn't happen. It's... so traumatizing.
***
Maybe I should kill myself, too. Is that what you want, Taichi? I don't want to die... Takeru still needs me to be his oniichan, his big brother.
I'm so afraid...
***
Oniichan....
***
I can't stop being angry... I just can't...
***
I feel so responsible...
***
I'm so... alone... my best friend... died...
***
I'm so confused... this like, isn't suppose to happen...
***
This isn't a problem that can be fixed... it's permanent...
***
Taichi... gomen nasai... but I loved you.
***
..........
***
The sun rose the next day, much to the children's sadness. Yamato woke up to the golden sunshine, a pang of guilt and sorrow ringing in his chest. Oh, Taichi... Taichi, why? I loved you so much...'
A crack of a twig brought Yamato out of his thoughts, and he looked up to see Hikari standing before him, tear stains very prominent on her cheeks. The young child of light smiled sadly, and made a gesture as if asking to sit down.
Yamato said softly, no feeling in the words.
Hikari sat down, and looked at the ground. After a few moments, she said, Taichi loved you too, you know.
Yamato raised an eyebrow, surprised. Taichi... he loved him...? But why hadn't he told him... A tear dripped down Yamato's cheek as he said, I loved him too... with all my heart... but I couldn't tell him... I was so afraid that he'd turn me down...
Hikari felt her tears welling up again as she continued. He told me. Taichi was the best oniichan ever, and he would always tell me what was bothering him... but he was always so afraid of being different... he always acted different than he really felt...
Yamato was silent, taking in this new information... Taichi loved him, and he had loved Taichi... but neither of them had told the other one... And now Taichi was dead. Because... because they were both afraid of being rejected...
Hikari asked.
Hai, Hikari-san?
Will you be my oniichan now, too? she asked. Taichi will always be my oniichan... but he always said that you were a great oniichan to Takeru... so... will you? Taichi... he would have wanted it that way.
Yamato looked at the rising sun, thinking about the question. Both he and Hikari had been hit the worst by Taichi's suicide, and here Hikari was, asking for Yamato's love and care to help her feel better. Taichi would have liked me to help his sister... I know how much Hikari meant to him...'
Yamato blinked, and another tear slipped slowly down his cheek. Taichi was dead, and Yamato had to accept that. But he had to do something... and helping Hikari out would be something... Taichi trusted him so much that he said that to Hikari, and now Yamato had to acknowledge the truth in Taichi's statement.
Hikari asked quietly.
Hai, Hikari-san. Yamato answered. I will be your oniichan.
A/N: The sequel to Can you see me...?' *sniff* I thought it was pretty good, for my second yaoi, and my first yuri! Yep, didn't cha see? Mimi and Sora were together in this fic... I think that Mira is a kewl couple.
The actual plot line for this story was something like this. Taichi loves Yamato, and Yamato loves Taichi, but neither say it. So Taichi basically falls into depression and kills himself, not realizing that Yamato loved him. And thus... well, you read it, didn't you? ^_^
Arigatou for reading! Please review!
Ja ne!
Kyra-chan