Smoem - A Smasher's Poem
By Joeb
Disclaimer: tickletickletickle! Do you feel better yet? I don't either (slits wrists)
I've got some real stuff coming soon, I just did this to blow some steam and get my ideas flowing. You'll be seeing a lot of that coming from me inbetween larger stories. It helps...
Ness, quite a bright light in the night,
too bad he doesn't know how to fight,
his brains now leaking on the floor.
Peach, somewhat fun, gets things done,
but for some reason she became a nun,
which I guess is better than a whore.
Fox, is a furry, therefore lolfag,
wait I just ruined the poem format,
this isn't a good poem anymore.
Falco, is a feathery, that's confusing,
you shouldn't spend much time musing,
a blood splat on your glass door.
Mr. Game and Watch, long name,
stupid black man without any fame,
he slips through a crack in the floor.
Pichu, a lad with no neck or ribs,
makes me wonder what that crunch is,
when I buy and eat him at the store.
Kirby, a clinical trial gone wrong,
used as an aphrodisiac in Hong Kong,
never mention this again I implore.
Roy, used to have nice red hair,
one day confused it for underwear,
not in this game anymore.
That's not the end you fool!
Ness used his bright light in the night to blind Peach who was having a fun time with Fox lolfagging, they were getting things done until Ness interrupted them.
Fox beat Ness until his skull cracked open and brains leaked everywhere, while Peach ran away and reconsidered life.
Fox ruined everything by killing that kid, and pretty much is just a failure at life, so they took him to prison where he was laughed at for being a furry.
Falco was flying around, but due to his anthromorphic build that was quite confusing, he didn't have much time to think about it, because he splatted right into Peach's door.
Seeing the poor bird die made Peach realize that petting people's birds was a bad idea, and so she became a nun instead.
Mr. Game and Watch met Fox in prison. He was going to call Fox a furry and laugh, but fell through a crack in the ground and died. Nobody noticed.
Roy went to the store to get something to eat. He saw a sack of 8 piece Pichu being served, and decided to have a bite. Unfortunately the Pichu had been tainted with Kirby excess from a medical experiment.
As Roy ate the wonderfully crunchy Pichu, the aphrodisiac Kirby hit him, and Roy decided to move to Hong Kong where he was told to take it all off.
Confusing his hair for underwear, he took his hair off, ruining the only part of his body anybody actually cared about.
And the dish ran away with the spoon...
"MY SPOOOOOOOOOOON!!!" Captain Falcon cried.
Now it can finish...
BUT IT WONT!
"Will you marry me?" Jigglypuff asked.
"Erm, we don't have any plot written for this part of the story, could you ask me next week when we've had time to think of a better way to lay out this story?" Jigglypuff shifted weight from it's left buttocks to it's right buttocks... twice.
"Why can't you just answer!" Jigglypuff cried in desperate despair.
"You know it's funny how desperate and despair sound the same, and yet one means 'to throw candy into a 47 year old's mouth' and the other means 'to tell the sleeping pills we can't hang out anymore'" Jigglypuff commented.
Jigglypuff was confused.
Jigglypuff made everything feel better, using peptox.
"That was a reference even I didn't get?" Pokemon trainer said, throwing a Pokeball at Mario and catching him.
Mario learned move lick.
Mario used lick.
Luigi used harden.
Mario used lick.
Luigi used harden.
Mario used lick.
Luigi used harden.
Bowser was confused and Ganondorf was bemused as the fuse ran away with the spoon.
"MY SPOOOOOOOOOOON!!!" The dish cried.
OK...
I think I should have ended the story the last time I had a chance.
Read and plzzzz Review I've discovered I'm a self-centered ego-maniac and if I don't get enough praise I just might take 50794983 too many sleeping pills one night... which means I'd take 100794983 instead of my normal 50000000
Actually I'm the first to admit that wasn't very good, but I'm thinking of updates for my Pirate story, UFUS, and a new story right now, so I don't have time to CARE about this ghey story anyway... oneshots suck