Title: The Adventures of Tony Almeida: Super Dad

Fandom: 24

Characters: Michelle Dessler/Tony Almeida, OC – Sam Almeida, Elena Almeida, Greyson the Boring

Word Count: 1,844

Rating: PG-13

Category: Fluff

Summary: Expecting one kind of Saturday afternoon, Tony gets stuck handling another. This one's a little messier.

Author's Notes: This fic was written for the lj plotvariations's challenge of: Mamihlapinatapai: "a look shared by two people with each wishing that the other will initiate something that both desire but which neither one wants to start." I hope it brings you a little chuckle.


It had started out so well, his day. The baby had slept through (most of) the night for only the second time in the eleven short weeks of his life, giving both of his parents some much needed rest. It also meant that Michelle woke up feeling frisky for the first time since before Sam was born, something he definitely had not been complaining about; he missed getting to do more than fall into bed beside his wife at night. So needless to say, after waking to the slide of his wife's impossibly soft skin against his, he'd started the day with a smile on his face.

She'd sidled up beside him at the coffee maker, resting her cheek on his shoulder and wrapping her arms around his bare waist. Wrapping his arms around her as he waited for coffee, he drew her close, pressing his face into her messy hair. Sam was happily rocking in his little bouncy chair, having just been fed, and Tony was mentally calculating the minutes until he went down again for a nap and he and Michelle could have more time to themselves. Then his beautiful wife had done it. She'd kissed his neck and lifted her face to his; reminding him quietly that his sister and future-brother in law were coming over, and she and Elena were going dress shopping. In that moment he saw all of his afternoon plans of tackling Michelle to the couch and having his way with her before they curled up together and watched a ballgame flying down the tube. There would be no afternoon sex while the baby napped, there would be no cuddling on the couch as the Cubs took the field.

Instead, he was going to be stuck with Greyson the boring. He liked his sister's fiancé, he did, he also just thought the younger guy had all the personality of a grain of wheat. He was a nice enough guy, and he treated Elena well, he just could also put an insomniac to sleep. Which, really, suited Tony just fine; at least he knew the guy would never screw around on his sister because no other woman would ever be able to stay awake long enough. It still didn't mean he wanted to spend all afternoon with him. Not to mention it wasn't going to be a picnic to be stuck with the son that had never been away from his mother for more than about 45 minutes. Both of them were going to be at a loss, and Tony just hoped that Sam would take pity on his poor bumbling father and maybe sleep the entire time his mother was gone.

Michelle assured him about a hundred times that it would be fine, they wouldn't be gone long, the baby would be just fine without her, and it wouldn't kill him to have a beer with his soon-to-be brother while they watched the game. He'd agreed grudgingly, knowing that Michelle deserved to get out of the house without him guilting her. He still mourned for his lost afternoon, but it had the possibility of being redeemed come evening when Michelle mentioned maybe stopping into Victoria's Secret.

Still, he panicked just a little when Michelle and Elena made their way to the door, purses on their shoulders. Sam was contented and happy against his shoulder, at least for the moment, but he knew that wouldn't last. Especially not after he went looking for his mother and just got his clueless father. The whole child-rearing thing had been very much a joint venture so far, and he wasn't entirely sure what to do without Michelle. She soothed both him and the baby.

Thankfully, Greyson didn't feel much like making small talk. For the most part, they sat on the couch and channel surfed until the Chicago/Los Angeles game started. Tony didn't really try to broach any sort of conversation with the young man, either. Greyson answered when Tony asked him questions - primarily about Elena - and he got up for more beer while Tony gave Sam his bottle, and that worked out fine for them both.

He had to say, he felt like quite the pro cradling his son and holding the rubber nipple to his lips. Sam had a tendency to be fussy when it came to taking a bottle, and to have gotten him to accept it on the first try, even as squirmy and finicky as he was being, was quite the accomplishment. He just wished that Michelle could see him; the display would've gotten him laid for sure.

Nearly two hours had gone by since Michelle left, and aside from the almost crippling boredom of sitting next to Greyson, the day was going relatively well. The Cubs were winning and even Sam was surprisingly content. He had cried just a little at first (so had Tony, but nobody was mentioning that) but apart from wanting Michelle at lunchtime, he had settled for his old man as a substitute. To everyone's delight, he had fallen asleep in Tony's arms almost as soon as his bottle was finished. Tony held him for a little longer before settling him down in the port-a-crib thing that had, ironically, been a gift from Elena and Greyson.

Of course, it was just a mere fifteen minutes later when it happened. He had first noticed it when he got up for another round, but had let it go, hoping that maybe he was just imagining it. The slightly queasy look on Greyson's face when he returned told him that it wasn't just an unpleasant thought in his head.

"I uh, I think Sam needs to be changed," Greyson announced after a moment or two of trying to ignore it.

Rubbing a hand over his cheek, Tony nodded, but made no move to get up to do it. Elena had said that Greyson had a gaggle of younger siblings; he'd probably changed a diaper or two. Maybe he'd take one for the team this time. Tony had no intention of being hit by the Sammy Almeida Super Spray today. It happened every time he changed the kid, morning, noon, or night. He could be in sweats or a suit and Sam would inevitably hose him down. He wasn't going to have that happen today, it would be just another nail in the coffin.

The two men shared a look, each clearly expecting the other to take care of the problem at hand. It was obvious from the way Greyson was green around the gills that he wanted the situation remedied, and while Tony had been around much worse, his eyes were starting to sting a little too. Even Michelle knew, though, diapers definitely weren't his thing.

That was it. Maybe they could just wait until Michelle got home. She and Elena had to be almost done, right? How long could it really take to shop for a wedding dress? Surely they'd be home soon and Michelle could take care of it. Besides, Sam was still asleep. If he wasn't bothered by it, why should they be?

Greyson's eyes widened. Apparently, Tony's inaction had given him some clue to his plans. It was either going to be Greyson, or waiting until Michelle got home, because he wasn't up to the challenge today.

"He's your son," Greyson muttered finally, breaking their staring contest to look in Sam's direction.

"And he's a trooper just like his old man. Ya see him? He's fine."

Famous last words. As soon as they were out of Tony's mouth, they watched Sam draw his body into a ball and let out a wail to end all wails. He and Greyson glared at each other again, this time silently urging the other to just suck it up and change the damn diaper. Neither moved, though, and Sam continued to cry.

Sam hiccupped a second or two later, sobbing even louder. It was enough to break him. He couldn't stand to hear the kid cry; it was just pitiful for the both of them. Feeling like a heel, he got to his feet, scooping his son up and taking the stairs two at a time to get to the nursery and soothe the savage beast. Almost as soon as the soiled diaper was off his body, Sam calmed. What felt like fifteen disgusting baby wipes later, Sam was finally cleaned up, and his little fist was in his mouth as his tears turned to whimpers and ceased.

The diaper went on without incident and he had to refrain from doing a victory dance. He'd made it through his first diaper change without being peed on. Congratulating Sam in a soft voice, he snapped up the little Cubs sleeper he'd grabbed after seeing that the mess had spread onto Sam's regular clothes and lifted his son onto his shoulder. Smoothing Sam's rapidly growing curls down, he felt the baby's damp cheek rest against his neck.

His hand slid down Sam's back, making soothing circles and whispering apologies for even thinking he would make him wait until his mother got home to clean him up. Patting Sam's diaper-clad butt, he left the nursery and made his way back downstairs. His foot hit the last step before he realized there were more voices than just Greyson's coming from the living room.

The grin Michelle bestowed on him as he walked into the room made his chest puff out a little. She greeted him softly, eyeing Sam's Cubs outfit with an amused fondness. Of course, his sister just rolled her eyes, tugging on her fiancé's hand and motioning for them to get out of there. Crossing over to him, Elena kissed his cheek and brushed her fingers across her nephew's back

"I take it you survived?"

He shrugged one shoulder, feigning nonchalance. "You know me, 'Lena. I'm a pro. Super Dad, even."

Elena snorted at that, kissing both him and Sam again quickly and promising to see them soon. He watched her wave to Michelle before collecting a couple more bags and offering them to Greyson to carry.

Greyson stopped in front of him, giving him a long look that Tony hoped he was reading to mean that he hadn't tattled on him to Michelle about the diaper thing. The room did smell a little like air freshener, and Michelle was still smiling, so it seemed like he really was on his side. Even if he wasn't going to help him out by changing the kid.

He was still boring, but at least Tony wasn't entirely ashamed to shake his hand and talk about seeing him next week.

It dawned on him that an afternoon with Greyson and cleaning up that much of a mess from his son was definitely worth it for the "You are Super Dad" look Michelle was handing him. Of course, the Victoria's Secret bag she had in her hand didn't hurt matters much. The night was still young, and the baby was happy. Things were starting to look up for him.