This will be a fairly short crack fic.
The Light had a request of Klarion the Witch boy.
"The Reach is making a delivery. We want the Justice League and the Young Justice Team distracted, preferably in a way that they won't take too seriously so it won't attract a huge amount of scrutiny."
"So, you're saying I've got free rein to have a little fun." Klarion grinned playfully thinking for a few moments "April fools day is in a few days. If you can arrange for the delivery to coincide with everyone's favourite day of mischief. I do believe I could manage exactly what you need. Is there anything vaguely techie that the League might believe we would want?"
"Star Labs is developing a serum to suppress dormant Meta genes from activating," offered Luthor.
Klarion's grin widened.
In the next meeting of the JLA, Green Arrow explained the information he'd uncovered. "I've stopped three separate break-ins and thefts at Queen industries. It was all chemical components designated for the Meta gene suppression project at Star Labs."
Batman started hacking, he sent a text to Robin who also started hacking.
"Luthor has been very vocal about Meta rights lately which is unusual as he is usually on the other side of that fence," noted Superman.
Batman spoke up. "A hole has been manufactured in the Star Labs security system for April 1st. I can correct the security breach or we can try to catch them in the act. We've seen activity on this in Star City, Central City and Metropolis. It would be best to know who's really behind this."
"Tech, Luthor, Star City, Central City from a skill set stand point, I think this is perfect for the YJ team," offered Flash. "Is this too big for them?"
After much discussion, it was decided that with the Meta suppression serum still incomplete, the security was lax enough that it was unlikely big guns would be sent after it. The YJ team would be assigned the mission.
"Are you up for this Dick? I'm aware of the significance of the day," spoke Bruce who had yet to suit up as Batman.
"It will be good to have something else to focus on," Dick still had the occasional nightmare but he no longer shut down like clock work every anniversary or special day. Usually, when he shut down now it was in response to a trigger he couldn't mentally prepare for. The last time had been a predawn patrol on a windy day eight months ago. A cloths line full of clothes had snapped and flown off into the wind. The resultant flash back sent him reeling.
In all, he was almost at the point were he didn't want to punch someone on the nose every time they used that stupid quote, "The show must go on." Now he'd just mutter darkly, "..it's freaking going."
Robin was sure he'd heard Batman muttering at that stupid song, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger." Flash had teased for years it should be Bat's theme song. Perhaps the muttering stage was as good as it gets.
Batman dutifully took the fake spider out of his coffee and left shaving cream in Robin's left boot. He called the team to the mountain and scowled appropriately as the Zeta announced Barman and Ruben, Kid Flash was Squid Splash, Flash was Zippity Doo Dah, Artemis was Artemis Fowl, Zatanna was Antenna, Black Canary was Black Coffee one lump or two.
"Every year," Black Canary muttered. "Every single year! It is you Robin isn't it?"
"Nope," Robin smirked.
"Yeah right sandwich boy," snarked Kid Flash. "Seriously Squid Splash was the best you could come up with?"
Kaldur swam in. Conner and Miss Martian were already there so they missed the traditional Zeta nonsense.
(In another city, Red Arrow used the Zeta only for it to announce Red Arrow. "SERIOUSLY?! Today you get it right?!")
Needless to say Klarion was waiting for the team. Superboy got blasted immediately but nothing unusual seemed to happen. Superboy's style of combat didn't put much effort into avoiding the hit. Miss Martian got blasted next or maybe she didn't. She was intangible at the time, again nothing unusual seemed to happen.
Klarion was giggling uncontrollably.
"Oooh Zatanna?" Called Klarion playfully. Zatanna had issues with Klarion.
"mih dinb, mih gag" she muttered.
Klarion held up a magic mirror which caught the young magician's image. Zatanna was bound and gagged. "I'm rubber. You're glue. What you say bounces off of me and sticks to you!"
"Hey Miss Martian! The bad guy, not me!" Complained Robin dropping from a tree to his knees and shaking his head.
"Sorry, sorry I missed! You're psychic signatures are similar."
Kid Flash zipped to drag Robin to cover only to be hit by one of Klarion's bolts. Very suddenly he was standing in the buff.
"HA HA HA! Kid Flash! Should of chosen another name!" Klarion chortled.
Robin staggered to his feet and gave Wally his cape which unfortunately Wally had no choice but to use to hide his identity rather than his unmentionables.
Kaldur was getting quite fed up with this. They were being owned by a child on a prank spree. "Miss Martian where is his cat?"
Miss Martian pointed to a bush on the outskirts of the field of combat.
Kaldur descended on the bush with extreme prejudice.
"Aqualad what the hey?!" Artemis dodged Kaldur's advance, completely loosing the sight line she'd had on Klarion.
"Miss Martian?!" called Kaldur annoyed
"Sorry, sorry I missed," she apologized frantically.
"I know, I know, MISS Martian. Wonderful name, if I do say so myself," cackled Klarion tossing a bolt of magic at Artemis while Aqualad was helping her up. Artemis rolled to the side and dove at Klarion and... painted a mustache on his face.
"Oooo I like it," complimented Klarion.
"What the frigg happened to my bow?" demanded Artemis who was now sporting an art smock, paint brush and paint palette.
Klarion danced out of the way not even trying to attack but still laughing uproariously. "Very Arty, ... Miss."
Kaldur, Conner and Robin were the only ones left unaffected.
"I'm not coming out. You're on your own." Kid Flash had a whole body blush going on.
Robin meeped terribly embarrassed. He was thirteen. He shouldn't have had to deal with this. Artemis had an odd expression on her face and she whipped a canvas out from somewhere and started painting the reluctant nude and muttering about lighting. Kid Flash is getting nudie germs on my cape. I am so burning that cape. "Come on Supes, Aqualad we seriously need to get traught."
Kaldur needed things to get back in control, "Miss Martian, stop helping and call the League."
"DON'T CALL THE LEAGUE!" shrieked Kid Flash.
"Mmmph!" Zatanna tried to yell.
"Is anyone else in the mood for jazz?" asked Artemis casually, still working on her canvas.
"Ahh haa haa, ha ha..." laughed Klarion nearly rolling on the ground at this point.
"Shut Up!" roared Superboy.
With Superboy roaring distractions, Robin tried to clock Klarion on the head with a spinning flip kick but the moment his foot hit Klarion's aura, a pre-prepared spell blasted him and Robin was thrown back. It was at this point Teleek decided Robin was very interesting indeed and came out of hiding pouncing toward the Robin robin who flew like a bat out of hell towards Superboy chirping what could only be American Robin for HELP!
Superboy cupped the tiny robin in his hands hiding him away and Aqualad bonked Teleek on the head.
Teleek and Klarion disappeared.
Aqualad stood panting frantically trying to catch his breath. "I don't think..." he panted. "I don't think we can count that as a win."
Superboy opened his hands to check on Robin now that a crazy magic cat wasn't trying to eat his tiny friend. Robin the robin had the data chip with the Meta serum in one tiny foot claw. He dropped it into Superboy's hand and awkwardly fluttered up to stand on Superboy's shoulder.
"Dude you rock, even as a Robin. Rocking Robin, get it?" called out Wally.
Robin robin chirped, shook his head in disgust and hid his head under his wing.
"It would be best if he didn't draw attention to himself right now," agreed Superboy.
Aqualad went to release Zatanna. "Did you contact the League M'gann?"
"I dialed the wrong number," she admitted.
Zatanna looked around then said warily at a flower, "rehtona ruoloc eb." When her own hair turned red instead of anything happening to the flower, she looked up at Aqualad grimly and shook her head.
They piled into the Bioship. Aqualad took the helm. "We are not 'missing' the mountain," he gruffly explained.
"It's fine Kaldur." Miss Martian answered sheepishly. She talked him through the controls and encouraged the ship to cooperated with Aqualad. The Bioship was usually controlled telepathically but she agreed to manual controls to help with the current situation.
Kid Flash wanted to see what had happened to Robin but everyone else wanted him to sit at the back of the ship. At least now that KF was among friends Robin's cape could be put to better use preserving his dignity rather than his identity.
"Rob, dude you seriously need to get taller, this cape isn't big enough."
Robin tweeted indignantly which proved his new form hadn't compromised his ability to comprehend what was going on. Miss Martian couldn't link with him telepathically but that probably had less to do with his new form and more to due with her new inability to hit the broad side of the barn with anything she was aiming at. The link was down. It was a good thing the Bioship buckled it's passengers in automatically or she'd still be trying to get Tab A into Slot B insisting she could do it.
Superboy cradled Robin robin in his hand gently as the Bioship took off.
"At least you seem uneffected," Kaldur commented to Superboy his hand hovering over the button that would contact the league. Ummm.. maybe they'd wait to contact the league until after they managed to find some clothing for Kid Flash. He looked back at Artemis, Miss Martian and finally Robin purposefully not looking at Kid Flash. No, Batman at least needed to be told immediately or else...
Perhaps only Batman, "Kaldur to Batman come in Batman. We have a situation."