Disclaimer: Don't own 'em. Never have. I'd like to someday though! Hey, Nintendo, I wanna buy...just kiddin.

This idea popped into my head one day...and now I'm putting it up on fanfiction.net for everyone to read! Enjoy ^_^

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Behind the Scenes: SSBM

Mario: Hello! Welcome to the backstage of SSBM. I will be your host today. Make yourselves comfy.

Luigi: No, Mario I want to be the host!!!

*Luigi smacks Mario*

*Mario smacks him back*

Luigi: Owie you hurt my nosey!

*Luigi runs away*

Mario: Ahem...as I was saying, I will be your host for today.

First, I'll show you the Bounty Hunter's room.

*Mario opens the door to find Samus and Captain Falcoln making out*

Mario: AHEM...

*Samus looks up, gets annoyed, and blasts Mario*

Samus: Learn how to knock!!!

*door slams shut*
Mario: umm...we'll get back there later...Next, I'm going to show you the cute characters of SSBM!

*Mario walks over to a door with a rainbow on it and opens it*

Pikachu: Pika Pika Pikachuuuuu!!!!!!

*Pikachu blasts Mario with a thundershock*

Mario: Piiiikkkaaaachuuuu stooppp it'sssaaa meeeeeee!!!

*Pikachu stops*

Pikachu: Pika?

*Yoshi comes in*

Yoshi: Mario!!

*Yoshi starts licking Mario*

Mario: Yoshi!...Yoshi...stop...!

Yoshi: Hmm...Yoshi hungry...

*Yoshi eats Mario and turns him into an egg*

Yoshi: Eww Mario needs shave...

*Yoshi walks off*

*Pikachu walks to the egg*

Pikachu: Pika?

*Pikachu thundershocks the egg*

*the egg breaks*

Mario: Uhh...thanks Pikachu...I think...Kirby! There you are!

Kirby: Huh? Oh, hi Mario! Whatcha up to?

Mario: I'm trying to show these people around...

*camera points to audience*

Guy: Hi mom!

Mario: Stop that!

*camera points back to Mario*

Kirby: Oh...well, bye Mario!

*Kirby runs off*

Mario: Kirby! Argh...well, now it's time to show you the Princess' room!

*Mario walks over to a door with a castle on it and opens it*

*girls shriek*

Zelda: Mario!!!

Peach: Learn how to knock!!!

*shoes are thrown at Mario as Mario shuts the door*

*Mario turns red*

Mario: Oops...ahem...well anyway...I'll show you the baddies room!

*Mario walks to a door with a skull and crossbones on it and opens it*

*baddies shriek*

Ganondorf: Mario!!!

Bowser: Learn how to knock!!!

*blasts of fire are thrown at Mario as Mario shuts the door*

*Mario turns purple and faints*

*Luigi comes in*

Luigi: Mario?...ooh...I can be host now! Ahem...I will now show you...the...erm...short people room!

*Luigi walks to a door that's a little more than half his height and opens it*

*Luigi kneels down*
Luigi: Hello?

Nana: Hello!

Popo: Hello!

Both: We're the Ice Climbers!

Luigi: Umm...I know...where's Ness?

Ness: Right here!

*Luigi walks on his knees to a small lab in the corner*

Luigi: What's up Ness?

Ness: Shh...this experiment is very important. It has the power to turn people as strong as...a giant monkey!

Luigi: Umm...ok...

Ness: One wrong move and it can explode!

*Luigi looks scared*

Luigi: I think I'd better go now...

Ness: Nonsense! I've almost got it! Oh wait...oh no...I did something wr—

*The lab explodes*
*Luigi gets up, unharmed*

Luigi: Ness? Are you ok?

Ness: I am fine!

*Luigi tries to feel around; there's dust all over the place*
Luigi: Ness? Where are you?

*Luigi feels something furry*

Luigi: Ness? Is that you?
*The thing picks Luigi up and sends him out of the room*

DK: Learn how to knock!!!

Luigi: Now how did I get in there?! Well...anyway...now I'll show you to the sword-fighter's room!

*Luigi walks to a room with a sword (duh!) on it and opens it*

Luigi: Marth? Roy? Link? Young Link? You guys here?

*Link and Marth are in the middle of an argument about...well, you know*

Link: She's mine!!!
Marth: No, she's mine!

Link: I saw her first!

*Roy and Young Link watches while fighting over a bowl of popcorn*

Luigi: Umm...Roy, what are they talking about?

Roy: Shh...they're getting to the good part!

*Link and Marth take out their swords*

Link: En garde!

Marth: Touché!

*They start sword-fighting*

Luigi: Erm...I guess I'll be going...now...

*Luigi runs out of the room*

Luigi: Right...ahem...lets see...ahh yes, the rest of the Pokemon...

*Luigi walks to a room with a pokeball on it and opens it*

Pichu: Pichu pichu!

Jigglypuff: Jiggly!!!

Mewtwo: They're complaining about the fact that Pikachu gets to be in the cute room and not them.

Luigi: Well, it wasn't MY idea!!

*Pichu and Jigglypuff power up their attacks*

*Luigi quickly runs out and shuts the door*

Luigi: Well...I guess..we'd better get to the Starfox people's room...

*Luigi walks to a door with the Arwing on it and opens it*

Luigi: Fox? Falco?

*Fox and Falco just stare at him*

*Luigi stares back*

Luigi: umm...I'd better...be leaving now...

*Luigi walks out and shuts the door*

Luigi: And last but not least...Mr Game and Watch!

*Luigi walks to a room with (surprise surprise) Mr. G&W on it and opens it*

Luigi: Game and Watch?
G&W: Beep beep beep beep!!!

*G&W throws Luigi out of the room*

Luigi: If I had to guess...he said Learn how to knock...

*Mario walks in with a bandage on his head*

Mario: Luigi.......!!!!

Luigi: And...that's it for backstage!!! Bye!

*Luigi runs off, hitting the camera on the way*

*Mario chases him*

*The camera is on the floor looking at the audience*

Guy: Hi mom!

THE END

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**AN** Wheeeee! How'd you like it? Plz R&R!