Beezarre asked: If Hanssen had some sort of diary-thingy, where he took note of stuff happening around the hospital (esp. AAU) what do you think would be on it? How much desperation would ensue from early-days Berena? Do you think he made a timeline, with a big question mark at the end of it for 'bloody finally' and 'oh no she didn't' after Bernie agrees to go to Ukraine? What would his reaction be to learning they kissed? What about to seeing them kiss? *loving the tol ace awkward Swedish beanpole*
I then added a second part in response to Go Ugly Early
Part 1
He hears murmurs around the hospital, the advantage of being able to sneak up on people despite being conspicuous. He knows the newest addition to the consultants has caused quite a stir. On her first shift he had to intervene, despite knowing the atriocaval shunt was the right call, she had been reckless, she had overruled Jac Naylor of all people. She was one to watch. He sees them, when they first meet, a handshake over a fuming car. This could go two ways, he muses to himself. Two driven, passionate women, if they end up working together it could end in flames, or it could be a dream.
He is glad, he decides, that they have started to form a friendship before being thrown into surgery together. If they immediately saw each other as rivals, there was a potential for sparks to fly. But Ms Wolfe's first shift on AAU runs smoothly. The scrub nurses mentioned light hearted conversation and flirting over a tendon repair. The same man who had served the divorce papers. Cups of tea and becoming fully paid members of the embittered ex-wives club.
When news reaches him of the upset on Keller, after Bernie's soon to be ex turns up, and the rumours of infidelity are confirmed, he worries. He ponders how Serena will react, having been cheated on before, finding out she's been lied to by one she considers a friend. Another part of him wonders, in light of the recent revelations about Bernie's sexuality, if this could be heading to an office romance. How would that affect the dynamics of the hospital. He sighs, lining up the pencil with the others on his desk. He doesn't like baggage.
He approaches Bernie about overseeing the ward, looking out for Serena when she gets back to work. But why does she not tell Serena? Has she not learnt that Serena's one pet peeve, well it's more than that, is lying? Has he got yet another consultant clash on his hands? The conversation at the end of the day makes him smile. Serena putting aside her pride and allowing an 'equal' to co-lead. How delightfully unexpected.
He gathers snippets of information, when you have many sources it's easy to see the bigger picture. And he sees it before they do, from afar. Serena asking him for a trauma unit, Bernie not being interested unless her co-lead is on board. The subtle change in her face when she discovers what happened. He writes to make sense of things, to get the jumbled thoughts in his head into an order, organised and crystal clear.
There's a not so subtle change. They start to avoid one another, there are awkward exchanges and stilted conversations in the lifts. They maintain the utmost professionalism, which causes alarm bells to ring. He looks back to when it started. The day of Fletch's stabbing. They had both operated, an emotionally charged environment. He puts a question mark. He hears nothing through his usual channels, but Ric seems to be watching both of them with a curious, amused expression.
Kiev. He shows it to Bernie, sees the glances over his shoulder. It's a push, for both of them. He's impatient, they've been out to dinner, the awkwardness is thawing, they need to sort out their priorities. He hates loose ends. Had he got it wrong? Maybe they had argued that day in theatre, blaming each other for the harm that had come to their colleague. Maybe he'd just presented Bernie with the perfect escape.
She had left, and Serena's mood turned sour. Maybe there was hope, after all. From his information he could deduce she was missing her. Why was Bernie staying out there? He hadn't got it wrong, he was sure. He picks up his pen. An email address.
He counts down the days to her return, has contingency plans. He doesn't hear much that day, so he goes to AAU at the end of the shift. Jason is grinning, he turns to look in the same direction in time to see the blinds being frantically closed. He smiles, a twitch at the corner of his mouth. His work here done, maybe this was one workplace romance that would be good for the hospital, after all.
Part 2
He can see the grief is taking its toll on both of the surgeons, and he knows Serena needs to go, find peace with the world before she can find peace with the hospital. He manages to help her see that she can and will get better, not back to before, but a new normal. He hopes that she will return. If nothing else she is an excellent surgeon and an asset to the hospital.
He doesn't know how to reach out to Bernie. She is throwing herself into her work. Nothing left for her at home, he understands. Occasionally he sees her greet Jason in the corridors, they seem to have maintained their friendship. She joins her staff in Albie's, laughing and joking but there is a faraway look in her eyes. A longing.
She is missing Serena, he doesn't know if they are in touch. Occasionally he thinks she might be in a better mood. Could she have spoken to Serena that day? Who knows.
Disaster strikes. Another young life lost. Another operation for Bernie on someone close to her. This one is not successful. He announces to the hospital, looks over the sad faces before him, picking out the top of Bernie's head. She is leaning against the wall, head down, dejected.
She has lost the passion for Holby. He can see that. She is resilient, she keeps going for the trauma unit. He comes out of the board meeting with a grim face. She will have nothing left.
He waits most of the day. He expected her sooner, but irony upon irony, on its dying day the trauma unit performs at its best. On a soldier to top it all off.
Ric wants to keep Bernie in the hospital. For someone who clashed with her more than anyone, that is big. Deep down, he knows she wouldn't stand for that. He doesn't want to lose her as a surgeon. But she won't be happy on any other ward. Keeping her and Serena's dream alive is what is tying her to Holby. It's been months, Serena has been in touch. She's doing better, but the same can't be said for Bernie.
The doors to his office fly open. She's done it once before, normally reserved but anger and passion overcoming her manners.
"Name one."
He offers her posts that they both know she has no intention of taking. He opens his email. Sends her a link. Perhaps this will be more suited to your talents. You still have some annual leave.
A reply, a formal letter of resignation attached. The subject makes him smile. We'll send you a postcard.
He hopes they will both return, happier, healthier and with a renewed passion for Holby. For now, it is time for him to face the next battle. But if those two can make it through, so can he.