As 3:30am hit an alarm went off waking Lexa up. It was her first day at Mercy West before the big merger was to take place. Lexa was pumped and ready to go already in scrubs hair pulled up in a ponytail, she grabbed her keys and went to her car and drove to Mercy West. Once there she got out of her car and walked into the hospital which was a little chaotic with the upcoming merger and all. She met up with Lexie and April smiling, she hadn't spotted Jackson but he spotted her. He walked up to her smiling and instantly recognizing her
"Lexa West! My have you grown up a lot "Jackson grins and pulls her into a hug.
"Jackson Avery?! You go to Mercy West?!" Lexa smiles and hugs him back tightly.
"Man I've missed you Lexa, so hasn't my mother. You should call her and let her know you're at Mercy West" Jackson says smiling.
"I will call your mother whenever we get a free moment today is our first shift 48 hours. I will find a free moment to call her don't worry "Lexa smiled more "How have you been?"
Jackson looks at Lexa "Great I've been great. How about you?" he looks her up and down.
"Amazing, med school was a trip hard at times but I got through it. Wish I had gone to the one you went to though, seeing how I had gotten in and all" Lexa looks at Jackson.
Jackson just smiles more "Lexa I wish you did too"
Once they finished talking they went and met up with their residents Jackson and Lexa happened to have the same one. With that the first shift began, Lexa and Jackson were on ER duty together. Lexa secretly liked him since they were little, she was afraid to admit her feelings and shoved them deep down inside. She wasn't about to ruin her friendship for a relationship, plus even though she knew his mother Catherine Avery she was a scary person at times. Even if she loved Lexa it didn't matter he was an Avery and Lexa was his best friend. She had spent a lot of time growing up at Jackson's after her father died her mother's new boyfriend got angry and mean. Jackson had actually hit him before me and him went our separate ways in med school. She started med school with a bruised up face and far away from her mother whom she barely spoke to, seeing how her man was more important than her daughter. Lexa was in a much better place now, she was at Mercy West and soon it was gonna be Seattle Grace Mercy West. She was definitely living her dream since she was little, her and Jackson used to play dress up in scrubs that his mom had bought for us to play in. We got to see real hospitals all the time, living with the Avery's had been incredible and such a blessing. It had been better than being beat to death and put in the ER, it had gotten to the point DCYF was ready to take Lexa away until Catherine stepped in and took her in. Lexa was so grateful and she appreciated it so much, she saved her life and she couldn't be happier.
Lexa and Jackson each took a patient and began sutures on them, Jackson peeked at Lexa often when he had a moment. Lexa kept working and focusing on her patient, who happened to need quite a few sutures. She didn't look up she held a conversion with the 24 year old guy, who told her funny jokes and made Jackson smile watching her work. Once Lexa finished that patient she moved on to the next, after 7 hours in the ER she was beat but ready for more. She grabbed coffee and a snack from a vending machine and sat in a quite empty room alone. Jackson somehow found her though
"Hey how's your first day?" Jackson smiles at her.
"Good yours?" she asks sipping her coffee.
"Great" he says and eats a bite of his apple.
They sit in silence for a few before Jackson breaks it.
"Are you involved with anyone?" he asks.
She nods slowly "Yes engaged but I'm not sure he's who I even want anymore. I feel sick to my stomach and horrible "she looks down at her engagement ring and tears just fall.
"I um need to go Jackson, please just give me space" Lexa asks and gets up throwing out her untouched food and taking her coffee and leaving the room in a rush. Jackson found himself alone and confused so he called his mom and told her what was up. Lexa found an empty on call room and locked herself in it and put her face into a pillow and just cried alone. She was an idiot for saying yes to Daniel, she wanted Jackson but that really couldn't happen. Lexa's phone chimed with a text from Catherine Avery,
C. Avery- Hello Lexa Jackson just spoke with me about what's going on I'd love to come see you and chat if it's okay?
Lexa wiped a few tears and replied back
Lexa-Sure that sounds great
Lexa sits there and cries more taking off the ring and looking at it. It was beautiful and it had been such a nice engagement and she felt horrible. She was dead inside and being near Jackson brought out old feelings she never could tell him, she feared everything even though he was the best friend any girl could have. Her phone chimed again
C. Avery-I'm on the next flight out. See you in a bit dear and don't worry we'll figure it all out. Much love
Lexa cried more with the sweetness of Catherine to her she replied back
Lexa- See you soon I'm being paged to the chiefs office.
Lexa got up and unlocked the door hiding her face by putting it down and nearly running into April.
"Sorry April" Lexa said and took off to the chiefs office.
Once there she entered and looked at him,
"You paged me?" Lexa asked politely.
"Yes Catherine Avery called and asked me to pull you off ER, until after she speaks to you face to face. I'm gonna have you go into a conference room and wait for her, you're going through a lot and its okay" the chief says.
"Thank you and I'm sorry" Lexa says.
The chief smiles "There's nothing to be sorry about"
With that the chief shows her to the conference room, where she sat down alone and held back more tears as her phone chimed this time a text from Daniel
Dan3- Hey baby just wanted to check on your first day on your intern year! Love you so much I can't wait until were married!
Lexa broke down badly not replying as Jackson walked by the conference room, he paused seeing Lexa breaking down alone. But he was gonna honor her wishes because he knew her better than anyone, it didn't mean it didn't hurt him to see her so sad. He actually was in love with her since they were kids and he had only ever told his mother it. She had advised him to keep distance in that department since she was getting married. Jackson hurt a little just holding his feelings down and he wanted to shout it from the roof, but couldn't. His thoughts were broken by his mother voice
"Jackson, You should go work I got her baby don't worry" Catherine Avery says to her son.
"Okay mom love you" Jackson says looking at Lexa crying one more time "Please make her feel better"
Catherine smiles, "Ive got this I will."
"Thanks mom see you later" Jackson says then walks off to go round on patients.
Catherine smiles as Jackson takes off and she enters the conference room to speak to Lexa. Lexa looks up as Catherine walks in and she cries more, she always went to Catherine with her issues. She always made her feel better and always knew what to do.
"Oh sweetheart it's okay," Catherine walks over to Lexa sits next to her and hugs her tightly.
"I-I-I wish it really was, but I'm about to talk about leaving my fiancée and I'm scared," Lexa cries and takes a deep breath, "I'm about to throw away an amazing guy because I just don't love him the way I love your son. I'm so sorry to confess to you instead of him, but Catherine I've always loved your son and I don't know how to tell him or why I'm telling you."
Catherine smiles, "Oh sweetie I've known forever, it's the way you look at him all the time. There is no shame in loving an Avery, you guys have history he always helped with the bad guys and you love my son more than a friend."
Lexa wipes a few tears, "Catherine he's amazing but I'm scared things won't work out."
Catherine puts her hand on Lexa's, "Baby it doesn't have to and if it doesn't trust me I will not judge you. I practically raised you since you were 14 years old!" she hugs Lexa tightly.
Lexa hugs back and smiles, "You're the parent I never had growing up and you're an Avery. I sat in board meetings at 15 with you guys for fun."
Catherine laughs, "Yes because you always followed Jackson around, he protected you from a lot and you've turned out just the way I wanted you to baby."
Lexa laughs too and hugs Catherine "Thank you I know what I have to do once my first shifts over"
Catherine hugs back and smiles big "That's my girl! Go save lives and don't hesitate to call if you need me"
Lexa smiles and wipes her remaining tears "I will, I promise."
Lexa got up and left the conference room running right into April, "Fuck I'm sorry"
April laughs "its fine, oh come help me with this patient please"
Lexa laughs too "Sure"
They walk off and into a patient room and Lexa's heart nearly stops. It was her fiancée that she needed to break off the engagement to.
"Oh shit" Lexa says.
Daniel looks at her seeing her eyes a little puffy "Is that any way to talk to your fiancée?"
Lexa freezes and doesn't say a word, Jackson walks in as Daniel looks at Lexa
"Well babe are you gonna come over here and hold my hand through this?" Daniel says looking at Lexa then Jackson.
Lexa still doesn't speak for a moment and then she breaks the silence, "um...Jackson and April I need to speak to him alone please"
"Of course" April and Jackson say then leave the room shutting the door.
Lexa walks over to Daniel and he holds out his hand for hers, but she doesn't take it "I'm so sorry Daniel but I can't do this anymore" she slowly pulls off the ring and places it in his hand tears falling "I didn't want to do this but my heart feels different now, and I was gonna do this differently but your here and I-I don't feel anything anymore. My heart loves someone else and has my whole life, I thought I was over the feeling but I'm just not and it's not fair to you so I'm breaking this off and leaving" Lexa bursts into tears and runs out of the room running right in to Jackson. She nearly falls backwards but Jackson catches her and says
"Lexa? It's gonna be okay"
Lexa pulls back "No it's not Jackson, I just broke off my engagement because I love you!" Lexa runs away and locks herself in a room but her pager goes off with a 911 to ER.
She pulls herself together and leaves the room and goes to the ER and meets an incoming trauma. Jackson walks in and spots her but keeps his distance, he knew the way she was she needed space. All he wanted to do was tell her he loved her too. Lexa works on the patient and goes in on her first surgery as an assist. She was already going places and her first day wasn't over yet. There was still 35 hours left of the first shift, and she was just getting started. She ends up in surgery for about 5 hours, leaving the first shift left with 30 hours. She yawns and hits an on call room to sleep, she walks in and Aprils asleep on the bottom bunk. She climbs up to the top and lays down instantly falling asleep, after about 1 hour of sleep both her and April's pagers are going off, causing April to fall off the bottom bunk. Lexa climbs down and holds out her hand to April who takes it. Lexa and April run off to answer their pages and Lexa passes Jackson on her way to answer hers. Lexa enters the ER and finds the attending that paged her. The attending points out the room she needed in and Lexa walks into it. She begins checking vitals and awaits the attending to come in so she can look the patient over too. Lexa then ends up in another surgery which was 12 hours long and that left 18 hours of the first shift. Lexa grabs coffee after surgery and runs into Jackson; she sighs and takes a deep breath.
"Okay, I'm done avoiding you Jay. I'm sorry I pushed you away; I don't want my confessions to scare you away. Jay I've always loved you, since the day we met I have been trying to not. I can't ignore it anymo..."
Lexa gets cut off by Jackson pulling her in to him and kisses her passionately. Lexa puts her arms around his neck and kisses back. That was not the response she was expecting but it would do. They kissed for a minute and Jackson pulled back smiling.
"Lexa, I've loved you since day one too. I never told you because I saw you try to love a guy who treated you amazing. He proposed and you never told me, you had to have known my feelings for you"
"I didn't honestly, I have no idea" Lexa said.
Jackson believed her because she never lied to him ever. Jackson kissed her again and she kissed back.
"Let's try to be together Lexa. If it doesn't work its okay" Jackson says seriously "If we don't work I'm always gonna be here"
Lexa smiles "Good because I'll need you"
Jackson smiles too and his pager and Lexa's go off. They part ways and Lexa goes to answer hers even though it was to her ex fiancées room. She takes a deep breath walking in and Daniel looks at her
"Lexa I had no idea, I shouldn't have proposed to you. I never knew you didn't tell me about any doubts you had or that you loved someone else. Lexa you should have told me" Daniel tears up and looks at Lexa.
"I'm sorry" Lexa begins to cry
"Don't cry Lex please... It's okay I forgive you" Daniel says.
Lexa cries more "Daniel don't please, I'm a horrible person"
Lexa leaves the room wiping tears and running into Reed.
"Damnit! Sorry Reed" Lexa says wiping tears.
Reed looks at her "its fine Lexa"
Reed and Lexa hug before they part ways. Lexa goes to get lunch and sits with Charles Percy. They eat in silence and when they finish they go grab coffee and sit and talk. Jackson walks in on them as Lexa is telling a story about a day at school. Jackson grabs coffee and walks over and sits next to her sipping his coffee.
"The girl tried so hard to hit me but missed! Jackson was watching from the sidelines and I knocked her out. I got suspended for a week and Catherine wasn't mad at me!" Lexa laughed and did Jackson.
"My mom loves her that's why" Jackson smiles and kisses Lexa on the cheek.
They sit and share stories for 5 hours leaving just 13 hours left. All there pagers go off for multiple crash victims incoming. It was all hands on deck once they entered that ER. They spread out and assessed each patient paging people and booking ORs. Lexa stays in the ER as Jackson scrubs in on a surgery. Lexa takes up discharging papers and sutures, the ER calmed her down a little. She was fearless in the ER and she felt happy there today. She worked the last 13 hours straight with coffee and snack breaks in-between 5 minutes every 5 hours. She didn't burn out and she didn't kill anyone, a few people came in dead and they couldn't save them. They were too far gone already; Lexa was paged at the end of the 48 hour shift to meet with the chief and other interns. They all stood in the office as they were praised on their success and talked about the loses. After that they were set loose to go sleep or go home and rest. They had a long year ahead of them and they were sure if they'd all make it being surgeons. Some failed out and some burned out, while the rest succeeded and went on to live their dreams. Jackson and Lexa left together and went to Lexa's apartment.
They walked in together and locked up and looked at each other smiling.
"We made it through!" Lexa kissed Jackson
"We have to drink to this "
Jackson smiled "Yes we do"
Lexa smiled and grabbed her favorite bottle of booze and two glasses. She poured one for each of them and smiled holding up her glass
"To making in through the merger and intern year"
Jackson smiled "Absolutely"
They clicked glasses and down their shots pouring another. Before they knew it they were both drunk and telling med school stories
"Oh god no he puked on her!" Lexa laughed hard drunk as could be
Jackson was laughing too "That's just not right"
Jackson and Lexa had finished the bottle and Jackson pulled Lexa in and kissed her. She kissed back and before they knew it they were both naked and having sex. Lexa had always pictured them doing this never thought the first time they did would be drunk, but that's ok. After sex they both fell asleep naked in bed cuddling. Around 3:00am the alarm went off waking them both up, Lexa slowly sat up with a pounding headache groaning. Jackson smiled at her seeing her naked still
"Hey there" he kissed her cheek and got up going to the bathroom to shower.
"Hey babe" she smiled and groaned again "Headache from hell" she gets up and finds aspirin in the bathroom and takes some before hoping in the shower with Jackson.
They shower together and end up having sex in the shower, what a start to the day. They finish and get ready for work they only had a few more days with Mercy West before the big change. They go to work and walk in meeting with the residents who give out assignments me and April end up on Peds.
"This is gonna make me want one" Lexa laughed
"I will one day when I'm married" April says.
April and Lexa were close too they went to med school together and picked Mercy West together as there school of choice. They talked about their childhoods and growing up, their surgical dreams and which service they thought they wanted most. They round on some babies and kids together before walking into a mom who was in labor and requested two female interns, because she wasn't comfortable with guys.
"Hi Tammy I'm Lexa this is April" Lexa smiles
April smiles too "We heard you requested some interns?"
Tammy breaths in and out "Yes can you guys hold my legs"
April and Lexa share a look that they had with each other that said were doing this.
"Yes we can "Lexa smiles and takes position at one leg while April takes the other.
There 3rd day of work started at 4am with a laboring mom and this went on for about 8 hours before there was finally a baby born. After congratulating the parents and goggling over the newborn, they went to check on a kid whose parents had a lot of questions about their son's surgery.
April answered all questions as I spoke with the boy who just wanted a little attention for a few before surgery.
"I'm scared Lexa" Tanner says
"it's okay Tanner, you're great hands. Dr. Sammy is the best here and she'll take great care of you" Lexa reassures him.
"Can you be there and hold my hand during surgery?" Tanner asks.
"I can say right by you while you fall asleep buddy if you'd like" Lexa says smiling.
"Please" Tanner says
"Of course buddy see you down there" Lexa says
After that April preps the boy and they wheel him down, as they get to the doors Lexa turns to the parents
"This is as far as you can go" Lexa says
They cry a little and nod and say goodbye to their son. We wheel him thru the doors and April scrubs in as does Lexa and she stands near the little boy once done. She keeps him calm by telling him to name his favorite things, within minutes after that he's under and surgery begins. Lexa stays by the little boy the whole surgery which took 12 hours. Once finished they scrubbed out and went to inform the family of how it went. April and Lexa smile and tell the success of the surgery to the parents who hug them tightly. Jackson walks by as Lexa's face lights up with the parents thanking them like crazy. Jackson smiles and heads off to check on his pre op patients. He was happy that she had already done surgery that day, he was about to himself. Their relationship wasn't ever gonna get in the way of their work; they both wanted the same thing to become a surgeon. They worked way too hard to get this far and ruin it with problems, they didn't need to flaunt their relationship to the world. Professional and personal were not mixed; they wouldn't single out and blew up at work. That was for home if they had a problem they both dealt with it at home. They knew each other like books; they even knew what move the other would make before they made it. Growing up together bonded them in a way no one else would ever know, or could understand. They were sort of made for each other and Catherine approved, and if they didn't work she wouldn't disown Lexa. She raised Lexa so she would protect her and she wouldn't love her any less. Catherine would scare the life out of her but then apologize because that's just her. Lexa knew the family and all about the Harper Avery Foundation and award, she dreamed of winning one since she started college. Her dreams weren't crazy they were just a long shot; she had years to go and years to grow. After Lexa and April left the parents they went to meet up with the chief, who needed to touch base some about the upcoming merger. They sat and talked to him until they were paged to Peds, which they took off to respond to. They rounded in on a newborn flat lining and pushed the bottom, Lexa yelled out
"Code blue! Page the Peds attending and get me a crash cart!"
A nurse did as she was told and Lexa started CPR and awaited the attending who came running in and took over
"Good job Lexa, keep this up and your gonna be the intern that raises up and never falls "
Lexa smiled and helped out "Thank you"
"Your gonna make a fine surgeon and I'm gonna be sad to part ways with you. Once the merger is final I leave for Italy to run a program out there"
Lexa looks at her "That's amazing congratulations!"
"Thank you" Peds attending says
"Your welcome" Lexa replies
They end up booking an OR and opening the babies chest up the surgery takes 6 hours and the baby doesn't make it. Lexa scrubs out after the Peds attending announces the time of death, she makes her way to inform the parents taking a deep breath and letting it out. She walks up to the parents who see her face and they shake their heads
"No please no!" the mom sobs
"I'm so sorry we did everything we absolutely could do for your baby" Lexa inhales and exhales choking back tears.
The couple sink into a chair and cry as April takes over for Lexa telling her
"Go cry somewhere I got this"
Lexa nods and takes off rounding into an empty supply closest and erupting into tears. She sinks to the floor and just cries a lot, she can't let herself do this but the baby was so little and didn't stand a chance the moment he flat lined. She gets up and runs to the nearest bathroom to splash water on her face and move on. As she exits the bathroom she runs into Jackson who already knew something happened
"Babe you okay?" he asks
Lexa nods "Yeah I lost a patient a newborn boy"
He hugs her "I'm sorry "
"it's fine I know it happens it was only because he was helpless and had no chance " Lexa said hugging him tight.
He lifts her chin to him and kisses her softly
"We can't save them all"
"I know" Lexa replies "We did everything we could he just didn't make it"
He rubs her back "I bet you did babe"
His pager goes off, "Gotta go see you for dinner?"
She smiles "Yes I'm having April and Lexie over for dinner if that's ok"
He nods "That's fine baby" he kisses her one more time before taking off.
She kisses him back and tries to figure out what they were gonna do for dinner. This was the first dinner with them and she was a great cook. She walked to Peds thinking and passing doctors she'd never see again after two more days. She walked in and rounded on post op patients while April did pre op. She answered all questions and took vitals writing everything needed on her charts. Once finished she grabbed her and April coffee and met with Lexie to discuss dinner options.
"I can cook anything you think of" Lexa smiled
Lexie smiled big, "Oh man that's a hard one"
April laughed "That's only because you're a stress eater Lex"
Lexa laughed too "But seriously we got to think of something, Jackson gets out around 8ish depending on surgeries and I'm done by 6. We could do chicken parm?" she looked at her friends
April and Lexie smiled "Yes that sounds amazing"
Lexa smiled "Good, chicken parm it is"
They chatted until all there pagers went off with a 911 to the ER for a gas leak explosion at a house. The 3 girls got up and rushed down to the ER, where Jackson was already. Lexa grabbed a gown and gloves and stood next to Jackson and awaited the ambulances.
Jackson looked at Lexa as the first ambulance arrived; she walked up to the EMT as they were pulling the patient out. She listened to them say what was wrong and nodded wheeling the lady in who was pretty messed up. Lexa and an attending begin to work on the patient, Jackson works on one across from her and he watches as the lady starts to bleed out. Lexa works quickly to find the source and holds the bleeder as the attending continues to work and assess coaching her to not let go. Jackson smiles watching Lexa hold down the bleeder and talk with the attending that pages cardio and general and books an OR. Lexa hops up onto the gurney and holds the bleeder as the attending wheels the bed with the patient and her on it out of the ER and towards the OR. Jackson watches Lexa as they go by Lexa was covered in blood and Jackson caught her eye as they went by she smiled and mouthed I love you to him as they left. He just smiled and stitched up his patient then moved to the next.
He ends up scrubbing in a few patients later, Lexa's in surgery for 9 hours and Jackson's in for 4 hours. Once Lexa finishes she scrubs out and heads for coffee before rounding on some patients. Reed and her end up together checking on post ops together. Reassuring families, getting discharge papers signed, and giving the housekeeping staff the list of rooms that were empty and ready to clean. Lexa finishes all that then meets Lexie for lunch as Jackson comes up behind her and hugs her from behind. She smiles and turns to him and kisses him, he kisses back
"Have I ever told you your sexy covered in blood?"
Lexa laughs "Why thanks babe"
Jackson laughs and smiles, they all grab lunch and sit together and chat and eat. Once they are finished they all grab coffee and await a page it was around 4pm Lexie, April and Lexa's shifts were ending in two hours, Jackson still had about 4 hours left. The girls end up not doing anything but some charts their last two hours and Jackson gets pulled into a 2 hour surgery. As 6pm hits April, Lexie and Lexa head to change and grab their things. Jackson walks into the locker room as the girls are heading out, he pulls Lexa back.
"Meet you at the car" she tosses her keys to April so they can get in.
"What's up?" Lexa smiles at Jackson
"Nothing just wanted a moment alone with you" Jackson smiles and kisses her.
She kisses back and smiles, Jackson changes real quick and pulls his jacket on and takes Lexa's hand. They walk out to her car which April and Lexie were already in the backseat waiting. Lexa hopped in the driver's seat, Jackson got into the passenger seat and they went to Lexa's house. They got out once they got there and walked up and inside, they all removed their shoes and coats. The girls went into the kitchen and started to cook, Jackson went to shower in Lexa's master bathroom. Lexa put on some music as they prepped dinner and they sang and danced while cooking. Jackson came out smiling seeing how happy Lexa was with her friends; he sat on the couch and put the TV on low. After about an hour of cooking the girls had dinner ready and the table set up. She grabbed them all beers and cracked them open and handed one to each of them as Jackson shut the TV off and sat next to Lexa at the table. They all held hands and let April say a prayer before they ate. They all shared OR stories from the day and Lexa topped them all off with the bleeder she had to hold. They all laughed and ate, once they finished they all sat on the couch and drank beer getting drunk and dancing to music. Once April and Lexie got tired Lexa showed them drunkenly to her extra rooms and let them crash for the night.
"Goodnight best friends" Lexa smiled and shut their doors and made her way back to the living room and grabbed another beer for her and Jackson, opening them and handing him one. He smiled at her and drank his beer, once they finished they made their way to Lexa's bedroom. Jackson locks the door and picks her up and lays her on her bed and kisses her as he takes his shirt off. They have sex then both fall asleep, around 1:30am Lexa wakes up from a bad nightmare gasping and scares Jackson half to death.
"Lexa what's wrong?" Jackson looks at her and pulls her into a hug
"Nightmare...I'm...Okay" Lexa breaths slowly.
"It's not real baby "Jackson rubs her back and holds her "Goo back to sleep"
Lexa nods and lays her head against him, and slowly falls back to sleep in his arms. Jackson falls back to sleep once he sees her asleep. They wake up to their alarm around 3:00am yawning and getting up and going to shower together then gets dressed, Lexa makes sure the girls are awake and ready around 3:30am. April, Lexie, Lexa and Jackson walk out and go to the car getting in and leaving for Mercy West. This was their second to last day before the merger; they walked in and met up with the residents who gave them their assignments. Lexa was on cardio for the day; she walked to meet the attending and grabbed the charts to start pre rounds. Lexa yawned grabbing coffee after rounding on her patient; she smiled at Jackson who was also grabbing coffee. They chatted for a minute before there pagers went off; they kissed and took off to their patients. Lexa walked into a patient who was awaiting a heart, word was it was on its way and would be there very soon. She prepped her patient and checked in on one other one before, scrubbing in on the transplant.
