Disclaimer: I'm not J.K. Rowling. I'm just having fun with her characters.
In Response to the House Quote Challenge on HPFC.
Quotes I used are in italics.
"He has such a patronizing tone and manner, and such a sarcastic sense of humor. I found him rather brutal, a kind of elegant brutality which appealed. No, I think he came pretty much off the page."
-Jeremy Northam
Chapter 1: Break-ups
"Mate, think it's time."
"Time for what?" Lucius asked his good friend, Rodolphus Lestrange.
"I'm going to end it with Melinda," Rodolphus said seriously.
"Oh?" Lucius asked sounding shocked. "But you two seemed so very…happy together."
Rodolphus visibly tensed on the emerald green couch. "Happy, my arse," he grumbled.
Lucius smirked. He knew very well that Rodolphus was unhappy with Melinda, but for a while Rodolphus had seemed oblivious to it. He just loved making fun of him for managing to say with the insufferable tart for this long.
"Oh, here's your chance. She's just arrived," Lucius said as he watched Melinda enter the Common Room.
"Yeah. I, uh, well…I guess I should be sincere about this, right?" Rodolphus said warily.
"When have you ever been sincere?"
"I just want to get it bloody over with."
"Well, then this will put your acting to the test! If you can fake sincerity; you can fake pretty much anything," Lucius said encouragingly.
Rodolphus nodded to himself reassuringly and walked over towards Melinda.
"Melinda, I'd like to speak with you," he said firmly.
"Roddy! What do you want to talk about?" she asked, not having a clue as to what was going on.
"I…Melinda, I'm breaking up with you," he said devoid of all emotion.
Lucius mentally winced, realizing that this was Rodolphus' sincere side.
"But…but why?" Melinda asked, tears welling up in her eyes.
"I said we're DONE!" Rodolphus' voice echoed throughout the Common Room, causing everyone to stop in their tracks.
With that, Rodolphus left her there, and returned back to the couch.
"I HATE YOU!" Melinda said before she ran towards the girl's dormitories.
"So? How did I do?" Rodolphus asked Lucius after the Common Room returned to its normal state of calmness.
"Very noble gesture. My favorite kind-dramatic, yet completely empty," Lucius said, his voice dripping with sarcasm.
"You really think so? I think I did pretty well, myself," Rodolphus said smugly, not catching his friend's sarcasm.
"You, my friend, need to practice your acting, and I was being bloody sarcastic," Lucius said as he looked upwards, wondering why nobody understood his sarcasm.
A/N: Well, this is chapter one. I absolutely love the plot bunny that I have in my mind right now. :) Feedback is appreciated.