Saying Goodbye: March 23, 2006

She sat quietly amongst the crowd with her head down. She wanted to but her broken spirit refused to accept that he was gone. The black coffin stood central to the mourning crowd while the minister rambled on about the virtues of a soul that snuffed out by the cruel hand of death. She heard the mournful tribute of a family friend then registered the ending of the drawn out ceremony. A faceless hand compelled her rising from the front bench and her following the still unseen coffin. There had been no need for her to view the face of the shell that once held the light of her life for the last ten years; a tearful farewell still filed away in her mind opened before her now. She shivered and a hand draped a coat over her slumped shoulders, defeat written across her face.

She soon found herself watching the tomb sink into saturated earth. The minister articulated another epistle while the darkened afternoon sky lamented the loss of a smile as bright as his. A solitary tear slid from her left eye as dirt thumped on the coffin.

"It's time to go." A masculine voice said. "I understand." It added when she made no move to leave the graveside.

"No you don't; you never could."

"Let's go. There's nothing left for either of us here." The girl looked up at the watery smile and nodded in agreement. There would be no returning to this site; though a body lay cold below her feet it was void of the life it represented.

"I loved him."

"And you will continue to do so." She shook her head at his obvious attempt at consolation.

"No. I may be able to remember that I love him and his memory will always be in my mind but never again can I love him with my eyes or my ears or my hands or my mouth or my nose. But most of all I will never be able to love him with my soul."

Life would never be the same; she knew this. She folded her belongings and gently laid them her suitcase. She had already put most of her things into storage and she had half a day of packing left. She moved carefully around her tiny bedroom, the room that she once shared with her husband.

"Hojo." She whispered to the framed memory. "Ten short years of bliss; no ten eternal years." She sighed and returned to the task.

January 14, 2007

Kagome had no job and being a trained nurse and housekeeper was not easy when people liked to do things themselves. Knowing this, she had spent a few more years at a butler school in London; playing majordomo to some rich tycoon was the next step. She really wanted to be a singer but her practical mother had sent her off to nursing school. After graduating at the top of her class at the age of nineteen, she spent two years as a nurse before resigning. She got trained at a vocational school in the art of housekeeping which took all six months then two years at the school in London.

Hojo's nine to five job as a lawyer paid all the bills easily. Now that he was dead, that reservoir would dry up soon. She straightened her skirt and rang the doorbell. She plastered on a smile and greeted the occupant.

"Goo-"

"You are woman; we do not want woman, we want man. Have a good day." The door closed faster than Kagome could utter a complete word. She was about to ring the bell again when footfall had her running scared to her car. She closed the door in time to see four-legged monsters glaring at her.

"Well that went well." She blew her hair out of her eyes, put the car in gear, and moved on to the next house.

The next house would not even answer the door. Kagome heard a vicious voice through the intercom telling her to shove whatever she was peddling. She stormed off and drove two houses down to the next house.

"These people called me and then don't even have the courtesy to have a decent conversation with me."

She parked the car and stared at the huge mansion before her. It was white with gold trimmings. It had a Roman looking without looking tacky. The lawn was beautifully manicured and bordered with lilies, her favorite. They had every colours and variety of lilies imaginable without the borders being overcrowded. She noticed two cherry blossom trees shading a seat and a small bubbling fountain. This was only a part of the luxurious lawn. She did not have time to take it all in because she was now at the door. She rang the bell then stooped to admire some azaleas. She was caught in this pose when the cook came to the door.

"Miss Higurashi?"

"Uh-yes. Please to meet you-"

"Miss Nakamura but you can call me Sophie."

"Nice to meet you Sophie. You can call me Kagome."

"I've forgotten myself; won't you come in?"

"Thank you."

"The master is waiting for you in the library."

"I've heard good things about Inu no Taisho."

"So formal. Call him Toga, everybody does."

"I couldn't."

"Sure you can." Sophie looked her over. "He'll love you."

"Why do you say that?"

"Long black hair, creamy skin, brown eyes – you have all the features of his late wife."

"I-"

"Don't worry, he won't cross the line. He's a lecherous fool sometimes but he's gentleman most of all." She opened the door to the library and Kagome came face to face with a fine specimen. He had silver hair down to his ankles and gold eyes to match the rich air. She knew a demon when she saw one but she had never seen one so delicious. The last word of her thoughts had her blushing.

"Kagome, you're finally here. I've been waiting. I've read your resume and I've burnt the others I received. Welcome to my home. A reasonable pay has been sent to your bank account and you're ready to work." He took a breath as he led her to a spiral staircase. Kagome was caught in a whirlwind as the man moved her with considerable ease. "You are in charge of everything in this house and everybody takes orders from you. This is your room." He said pausing for her to look into a pale blue room. Kagome did not catch anything else as the door closed and she was once again moving.

She must have been through five more rooms which she did not remember before she finally caught her breath.

"Wait-"

"We don't have-"

"Please, sir, I need to say something." The large demon stopped and faced her without stumbling. "I came for an interview not a tour."

"Yes. I'm sure you have but you see I have no desire to waste time interviewing people who just don't meet the requirements. You will do."

"Why would you just hire me on the spot like that?"

"I like you. Simple but true. You have a grace and calm about you that will do well in this hectic household." He laughed.

"Doesn't seem too hectic to me." She said looking around at the empty hallway and the ensuing silence.

"That's because my sons are not back from a hard day of work. When they get back I figure all hell will break lose, especially when they see you." He looked her up and down and Kagome felt mildly violated. "I wonder which one will fall victim to your charm."

"I assure you, I am a professional. This may be my first job but I'm always a professional."

"You'll find that difficult in this house with three demons; granted my youngest is only half. He however, is the most difficult to handle."

"I can handle it."

"I'm sure you can. Since this is your first day, you'll eat dinner with us and you can begin your duties tomorrow. Fro now, get to know the staff and the house. There is a map of the premises and a layout of the house in your room. I'll take my leave now."

"But-"

"Don't worry. Breathe." Kagome closed her yes as she inhaled only to open then to an empty hallway.

"I hope I know what I'm doing." She cancelled her one remaining interview as she headed to the front of the house to unload her car.

Unloading the car was easy enough but getting the luggage up the staisr was going to be a challenge. She decided it was best to do it on her own; asking the staff to help was not an option until she had become one of them. She grabbed the smallest things to carry and hurried over the spiral staircase. She was breathing hard by the time she got to her door. She quickly deposited her burden and returned for the rest of the luggage. It took her fifteen minutes to get most of the luggage up into her room and now all that was left were the three heaviest bags that required three trips each. Kagome was exhausted. The stairs were a strong test of willpower and endurance; Kagome had run out of both.

"Need some help?" A deep voice said from the shadows. It had a rich texture and tone that pleased her but made the hairs on the back of her neck stand up.

"That would be nice." She answered sighing.

"I must admit you're persistent. I would've given up and five minutes into the work." A handsome man emerged from the dark doorway and he bore a striking resemblance to her new employer.

"Well, if I was not persistent, I would not here." She smiled at him. "My name is Ms. Kagome Higurashi; the new butler." She said extending her hand.

"Butler?" he looked her up and down with an arrogant and surprised air that made Kagome want to slap him with her extended hand. "You're not what I expected." After another second he shook her hand. "I am Inuyasha; pleased to meet you." He said with a smirk.

Kagome knew she should not comment but her loose tongue go the better of her. "By your smirk I gather you would rather I was a man." She said with a smile on her face. "I also gather you do not like me as a person at all although I do not know what I could have done in such a short time to offend you." His right eyebrow shot up and a sardonic smile replaced the smirk.

"You're very perceptive. Why I do not like you is of not consequence since I am not your employer. Your superior, yes, but not your employer. I'll just have to live with you." He was still holding her hand and seemed in no rush to release it. She scanned his face.

"I assume this farce of a handshake is to see if I'll blush and go all school-girl on you? Well it will not work. I'm no school girl and you do not intimidate me." She said pointedly as the grip on her hand tightened slightly.

"You have such a mouth on you." He said. "I'll get your bags to your room and end this unpleasant encounter." He said and pawned all three heavy bags and practically ran up the stairs before her. By the time she got to the top, her bags were already in the room and the unpleasant but very masculine Hanyou was disappearing in what Kagome knew to be his room.

"Father, you have some hidden agenda in bringing that woman here." Sesshomaru said eyeing his father from his seat in the library.

"What gives you that idea?" Toga answered as he lounged in his chair.

"You've been trying to marry me and my idiot of a brother off since we learned to walk."

"Don't want you two getting stale." He laughed. "I have no hidden agenda. I seriously need a butler to help me run this house since I do not intend to marry again."

"Mother would not hate to live here again." He teased.

"I'm sure she wouldn't, Sesshomaru, but she is not the kind of woman I want in my house. She's your mother, I know, but our time was done a long time ago."

"This I know for myself." He said pouring himself a glass of water. He observed the flasks of drinks that his father kept solely for entertaining. In his younger years, he had sneaked a taste but the repulsive and poignant taste was too much for his heightened senses. A vow was made to never touch the stuff. He had forced a small amount on his younger brother out of spite once, he remembered, and the memory made him smile. Inuyasha was his least favorite person when his father and Izayoi had brought him home but it was hard to resist the little tyke for long. Ever since he had accepted his little brother, they had done everything together, including securing their bachelor status. The new woman in the house would prove to be a challenge in maintaining this life; he had not been introduced to her yet but the glimpse he caught of her made him take a second look. He was not particularly interested in her but he was male enough to notice a beautiful woman with a heavenly scent. His father's voice pulled him from his reverie.

"How's the business going?"

"As if your little minions do not report everything that happens in that building." He countered swirling the water in the glass.

"True but they can never acquire all the details."

"Well, we've lost the talent manager and she was a damn good one. We're in the process of interviewing now."

"Right, right but why did Ms – what was her name again?"

"Ms. Fujiami; she was a jewel."

"Why did she leave?"

"She got pregnant and decided to become a housewife. She turned in her resignation and left yesterday." A look of disgust played across his face that Toga did not miss. He considered explaining the concept of motherhood to his son but this seemed like a hell of a time to start another argument.

"Housewife? Is she getting married?"

"Apparently so; she gave me an oral invitation while giving me the resignation. I'm not worried but if we do not find a replacement soon, we're in trouble. The current campaigns are going fine but we gotta start scouting for a new face and voice as soon as possible."

"You'll work it out."

"I wish my idiot of a brother would help; he's got an eye for this sort of thing. He found the last three and practically sealed the deal."

"So ask him."

"He has decided to venture into other fields. He's been working on his publishing company for a while now."

"Yes, of course. How's that going?"

"Ask him yourself. I assume he is home."

"He got home a few hour ago and holed himself up in his room; he's been doing that since the unfortunate falling out with Kikyo."

"That vile reprobate deserves to be hung by her toes over a cliff for what she did." He said vehemence fueling the rage he felt towards Inuyasha's last girlfriend.

"Easy now, I'd like to throttle her myself for almost getting my boy killed."

"If that was only what she did-"

"I really wish you people would stop talking about Kikyo." Inuyasha said entering the room.

"And I really wish you would give the woman just what she deserves." Sesshomaru said.

"Well according to you two she deserves to die but do you really think I can kill her?"

"We wouldn't expect you to." Toga said laughing. "Just give her a little trouble for a while; teach her a lesson."

"I'll consider it. As it is, I have to still watch my back for the bastard that almost cut my throat for her."

"I would not worry about him anymore." Sesshomaru said with a smile.

Kagome did not know what compelled her to stay outside the door and listen to such a private conversation. She regretted it when they said the word 'kill' and then even more when Sesshomaru, the older brother said 'I would not worry about him anymore.' Fear enveloped her. Did I move in with killers? Am I in the house the Dog Mafia? Images of shows portraying the work of the Italian Mafia had her breath catching in her throat and a tiny whimper escaped; she realized then that her feet refused to work. Maybe it's not too late for me to leave. She thought. That is until the door swung open. Her eyes widened even as a terrorized scream escaped her lips.

The men turned to the door when they heard the small sound. A normal man would have missed the sound but their keen sense of hearing picked it up.

"It seems our new employee is outside the door." Toga said. "Why don't you invite her in, Inuyasha?" Inuyasha muttered incoherently as he opened the door. His silent rant was cut short by the piercing sound emanating from the small woman outside the door. All three men covered their ears from the sheer pain.

"Shut her up!" Sesshomaru shouted. Inuyasha reacted immediately by covering her mouth with his large hand and slamming her up against the wall which she already braced. The slamming of her small frame was a clumsy attempt to silence her but it worked. Once his ears had stopped ringing he opened his eyes to look down at her.

"If I move my hand, please do not scream. It is painful to hear that sound. Agreed?" she nodded her eyes full of terror.

"Please don't kill me; I promise not to tell anybody. I'll pack my bags and this will have never happened just please don't kill me. I did-" the words flew rapidly out of her freed mouth but Inuyasha quickly covered her mouth again. He saw his surprised and confused look mirrored in her large brown eyes; this expression quickly turned to amusement when he went over the conversation he was just having with this family. He tilted his head back and laughed. Kagome was too scared to be offended. She heard as the others started laughing in the library and terror was replaced by confusion.

The laughing took a while and Kagome was still pressed up against Inuyasha, her mouth still blocked by his hand. When it did finally stop, Inuyasha's eyes were shining with amused tears. She suspected that the others had the same look.

"You-" he said to begin but stopped to compose himself. "You think we were going to kill you? You're really funny." He said. He expected a response until saw her mouth was still covered. He removed his hand slowly as she looked at him through intelligent eyes.

"I-I guess I should not have been eavesdropping." She said in apology.

"True but you managed to lighten the current mood." He stepped back and allowed her to enter the library.

"Ms. Higurashi, I'm glad you could join us before dinner. We'll get a chance to become more familiar with each other." Toga said. Kagome remembered how familiar it felt to be pressed up against Inuyasha a minute ago although she was completely incapable of moving for fear. She almost blushed but managed to stop the revealing reaction.

"Thank you. I must apologize for my impropriety just now."

"No harm done." Toga said. He got up and gave her his seat while he took a seat on the larger couch with his sons. "I assume you've met Inuyasha already so this is my elder son, Sesshomaru."

"You three are almost identical around the facial area; had it not been for your difference in height and your choice of hairstyles, among other things I would not be able to tell you three apart." She observed the business suit that Sesshomaru sported and concluded it was tailoring perfection; the black suit against the white shirt and black tie definitely suited what Kagome called his brooding nature. Toga was dressed in a similar suit but it was devoid of the tie and the first couple of buttons on his light blue shirt were undone. Inuyasha was dressed like a rebellious teenager with his baseball cap, t-shirt and blue jeans, jeans that fit very nicely. She quickly averted her eyes and focused on her employer.

"My father has been very secretive about his reasons for hiring you other than your obvious qualifications." Inuyasha said returning to his blank expression.

Kagome narrowed her eyes briefly then answered simply. "If my qualifications are so obvious I do not see why there should be any further explanations. I think your question is redundant." She caught his glare as well as the amused glances from his brother and father.

"Obviously, you need a lesson in respect." He said folding his arms across his chest. Kagome took it as it was, a defense to keep her out.

"I guess since you cannot cow me into submission with your tongue you resort to using your superiority. You do not intimidate me and if I am crossing the line I have no problem with seeking employment elsewhere." She said directing the last part of the statement to Toga.

"No need to be rash. My son is an idiot I am afraid. Do not hold it against him." He said with a gleam in his eyes. "I like your spunk." He said then chuckling.

Sesshomaru addressed her for the first time since the conversation started. "It seems you fit in well already. I have no problem with my father's choice." Kagome nodded recognizing the acceptance. "Now, if you'll all excuse me, I'll go harass Sophie into giving me a cookie before dinner." Kagome appreciatively watched, as he seemed to glide out of the room. He moved with ease for such a large man. She went back to looking at the two that still occupied the room.

"I'd like to go and freshen up for dinner." Toga said suddenly, making Kagome suspicious. "Please excuse me." He moved quickly leaving Kagome in an uncomfortable silence with the glaring son.

"Okay, spit it out." She said impatiently. "Say what you have to say."

"How do you know I have something to say?"

"Because you've been swaying between wrapping your fingers around my neck and lashing me with your tongue. I much prefer the latter."

"Perceptive." He said smiling. "I do not know how to deal with you yet, but I would prefer if you just did your job and stayed out of my way."

"Oh darn, there goes my plan to accidentally get you alone some other time." She said sarcastically.

"You've a wild mouth that needs taming." He said then after a pause he said. "Your sarcasm ridden statement has some truth to it. While you may not go out of your way to get me alone with you, accidental secluded meetings could prove dangerous." He said with a knowing smile. He then added. "I may not like you but I will not lie about being attracted to you." The arrogant look on her face quickly became a surprised then embarrassed blush. She did not respond for a few seconds.

"Then I should repeat your warning; stay away from me, I do not have time for a casual sexual affair." It had been a year since Hojo died but she was hardly past the love that she still had for him.

"I agree." He said remembering his last serious relationship. It was unnerving how Kikyo and Kagome resembled each other. He saw this but also saw the stark difference between the two. "I guess we should head to the dining room before this pleasant conversation becomes something more primal." He was rewarded by another blush.

"As if I could stomach you touching me." She rose and walked to the door effectively ending the conversation.

The dining room nothing like the rest of the house. Where the other rooms were grand and perfectly decorated, the dining room had a quaint and homey feeling to it. It almost glowed with the love she felt went into decorating the room with the soft colours that jumped out from the white walls. The table was small and cozy so that conversation with the other diners would not be done in a loud manner. It however encouraged close proximity to a certain man that she did not want so close right now. She was not attracted to him but he made her nervous and uncomfortable. Sophie served the food and the eating was done quietly until Toga broke the silence.

"So how do you like Lilies' Garden so far?" Toga said. By the confused look on Kagome's face, he realized she did not know where Lilies' Garden was located. "My home I mean, it is called Lilies' Garden."

"I adore it; I assume it got it's name because of the many lilies decorating the lawn?"

"Not only the lawn, the entire land. My late wife adored lilies."

"Then I share her enthusiasm; lilies are my favorite floral organisms followed by Jasmines."

"My wife also loved Jasmines, which is why there is a gazebo in the garden with Jasmines. You'll love it. I made it especially for her."

"I could not impose on you so much." She declined even though her eyes sparkled at the prospect.

"I'd be honoured if you made use of it. I know the poor plants are getting lonely. Luckily, the Jasmine is in bloom." He said warmly. Kagome thought for a second.

"Very well." She smiled. She ate some more of the baked chicken then said. "Who decorated this room? It is so different from the rest of the house."

"Izayoi." Sesshomaru said. "She coaxed my father into a room for herself. It reflects her beauty." He said.

"I agree." Kagome said. "I do not know her but I can sense she was loving woman. Your mother seemed to be an exquisite woman." Kagome said. Sesshomaru smiled at this.

"Izayoi was not my mother by blood but she raised me. She is Inuyasha's mother; unfortunately he did not have as much time with her as I did." Kagome looked at Inuyasha who had not contributed to the exchange and seemed intent on keeping this up.

"How sad. I wish I could have met her." Kagome said still looking at Inuyasha.

"Get to know this young fellow here and you'll know the woman that rocked his cradle." Kagome doubted the veracity of the statement and this showed on her face. Toga laughed. "Do not let his rough exterior fool you; he's a teddy bear."

"Bears bite." Kagome said wisely. Toga laughed again.

"Well if you fear his bite, I do not mind applying for the job." Kagome laughed at the easy manner he had with her.

"I'm sure I would not mind."

Not to be left out, Sesshomaru added, "As long as people are applying I don't mind biting you either." Kagome flushed at the attention she was getting.

"Imagine me toting two handsome men around. I'd thoroughly enjoy it."

"Can we end this dinner on a pleasant note?" Inuyasha said.

"Why, you've found your voice, Inuyasha." Kagome said mocking him.

"I'll excuse myself." He rose.

"I guess I should leave too. I have work in the morning." Kagome said rising from the table also. The Toga and Sesshomaru rose simultaneously and watched as the feuding pair exited the room.

"Those two are going to kill each other." Toga said. "Maybe I was wrong in hiring her."

"No; she's just what Inuyasha needs to pull him out of this depression."

"Maybe. It'll be fun to watch though."

"Indeed."

Kagome changed into her sleepwear after having a warm shower then settle down with a good book.

She read for half an hour before giving up on sleep. She was too excited. She slipped out of bed and after covering her revealing nightgown with a silk robe, went in search of Jasmines. She got lost a few times before finding the back door. Thankfully, the garden was expertly lit because she had forgotten her flashlight. She identified the gazebo and headed straight for it already enraptured by the thrilling scent of Jasmine in the air. She took a minute to let the moon illuminate her face as she experienced her surroundings. She stooped to admire the lilies that encircled the small pond in front of the gazebo. A few curious fish came to investigate the intruder then resumed their carefree activities. Slowly made her way to the gazebo but again she was distracted by the abundant lilies around her and so she stooped down to gently caress the red flower.

"I wonder why a woman is out here at this time of the night in next to nothing."

A deep voice said from the shadows of the gazebo effectively scaring the hell out of Kagome she stood up so quickly she lost her balance and went tumbling into the pond, or so she thought.

"Careful now." The voice said.

She opened her eyes to find herself secure in Inuyasha's arms.

"If I didn't know any better I'd say you were trying to get me alone."

"Thankfully, you know better." She said grateful that she was not being fished out of the pond. Her robe was sufficient coverage dry but wet it was like a second skin. "If you'd help me up."

"I rather like having you in this disabling position. It serves to keep your aggressive nature in check."

"I do not have an aggressive nature. If I have one it is since I met you."

"I have affected you that much? Why?"

"You offend me every chance you get; how am I supposed to react?"

"I do not know. I find myself in a similar position. I am stuck between a strange dislike for you and a physical attraction to you."

"Let me go."

"And for some strange reason, I sense the same thing from you." He said as if she had spoken.

"Sense?"

"I assumed you knew of my family's heightened senses; I am able to hear when your heart speeds up, like now. I'm able to see the light blush coloring your cheeks even in this pale light. I can feel the tension in your body every time I breathe. I can smell your arousal." He smiled when she frowned. "If you happened to be. Right now I smell apprehension, fear, and curiosity."

"It is impossible to smell someone's emotions or moods."

"Not for me. Your smell changes with each mood ever so slightly. You have to be me to know how to recognize it." He said proudly.

"So what else do you smell on me?" she asked even though she should be insisting on distance between them.

"There is only so much I can smell. However, I smell sadness and wariness. Why is that?"

"I think its time I went back to the house."

"Not yet. I have exhausted my four senses but I have yet to use the fifth."

"Then find some food to eat. I'm going to bed." She started to fight him but that only served to force her closer to him.

"I would not struggle anymore; I'm capable of holding you here without much effort." She tired to free herself again and when she could not she started to panic. Something dark and horrible uncoiled inside her making her fear Inuyasha more than she knew she should. It was illogical. She knew he was only teasing but the feeling of being trapped and helpless made her fall into a memory not quite clear but it was there.

Inuyasha sensed the inner turmoil and the mounting panic. She was looking at him but her eyes shone with intense fear and anxiety. Quickly he released her but she was not breathing properly anymore. She was clawing at her chest and wheezing; she sank to the ground amid the beautiful lilies.

"Kagome?" she did not answer or even acknowledge he was there. He forced her to face him but even as she looked at him, she seemed so far away. Great, her first night here and I give her an anxiety attack. "Kagome, look at me, breathe. You have to breathe." He cupped her face to stop the violent thrash of her head and repeated the words. What the hell is going on? She sobbed loudly as she clawed at his chest. He crushed her to him and her nails dug into his back. He held her securely while rocking her and ensuring that his breathing was steady. He noticed her breathing slowly returning to normal and her pressure on his back eased.

"Good girl." It was a few more minutes before she responded to him.

"I'm fine now."

"I'm not so sure. I thought you were going to die."

"Just an anxiety attack. I'll be fine."

"Was it my fault?"

Kagome did not know how to answer that. She would have said yes but she could not entirely blame the incident on him. He triggered something in here that lay dormant but was once again buried. She had no idea what it could be. The only words that came to mind was self-preservation; an instinct to survive. Desperation.

"I'd like to go back to my room now." She hoped she could maintain her dignity and walk back but apparently her knees as well as head was still under the influence of oxygen deficiency. Her knees buckled and then her world went dark.

"Dammit."