Yo watsup, my name is Timothy and I'm the main character of this story. This is a story about my life and how I become successful. I hope you find my story entertaining ^_^. I may miss little details here and there and I hope you can forgive me. If you can't, then you can fuck right off. Stupid piece of shit.
When I was in grade 12, I had a discussion with my parents about my future career. It was during a bright Sunday afternoon as I walked into the living room.
"Hey dad, hey mom."
"Sit over there, Tim." said Dad.
"So, have you decided to which university you want to attend next year?" Mom asked as she turned her head toward me.
"Yes, father and mother. After looking at all the offers, I made my decision." I replied. "I decide to go to the Culinary College of Waterloo. My dream is to cook the dankest meme in the world."
"Great decision." Dad replied, nodding his head repeatedly with the speed of 30 km/h. "But Tim, you must realize that cooking memes is essentially the same as serving the people. It is a very difficult career and it will be very tiring. You must be sure you have what it takes to succeed in a very competitive field."
"No problem dad. I ranked first in the latest meme competition in my school. I have what it takes."
"Oh… Tim. I'm just so proud to have you as my son." Dad nodded his head faster at the speed of 50 km/hr.
"I will work hard in the Culinary College of Waterloo." I continued. "So I can get a master's degree…. and even a PhD in Memeology! I will make you proud dad! Just watch me."
Dad was really happy to hear that, as his nodding speed accelerated to 80 km/hr. However, his nodding speed was too fast for a human. So his neck muscle ripped off and he died.
"Wow what a day. I think my husband just died." Mom said.
"I think so" I replied.