Title: What's Your Problem?
Author: Hieiko

Author's Notes: A bit of silliness that struck me in the wee hours of the morning.
Disclaimers: I don't own Buffy the Vampire Slayer or Angel the Series, or any of the characters in these shows.
Distribution: If you want this, go ahead. Just tell me where it's at. Thanks.
Feedback: Would love that, pet.
Rating: PG-13

Pairing: Spike/Angel

Summary: Post – The Girl in Question. Buffy finds out that Spike and Angel had been in Rome, and heads to LA to give them a piece of her mind. It doesn't work out that way, because of a certain blonde vampiress.

Buffy strode through the halls of Wolfram and Hart with only one goal in mind: kick the asses of certain ensouled vampires. How dare they show up in Rome, without even the courage to face her? Hadn't they learned that stalking her was not a good thing? So yeah, she had a new boyfriend; they didn't have to be such children about it.

She stopped in front of Angel's office, and who would she find there but Spike's skanky ho of an ex-girlfriend?

Buffy moved to the door. Harmony looked about to protest, until Buffy pulled out a stake from inside her jacket.

The Slayer steeled herself, and kicked the door open.

She gaped at the scene before her, as her stake clattered to the floor.

From inside the room, there came startled yelps, muttered obscenities, and the shuffle of hastily rearranged clothing.

"Oh. My. God. What on earth were you two doing?!" Buffy shrieked.

Spike and Angel looked at each other, glared, then looked at every other thing in the office as though the answers could be found there. Eventually it was Spike who broke the silence.

"'Think you've got eyes, Slayer. It was bleedin' obvious what we were doing," he said, crossing his arms in front of his chest. However, his hair was currently a riot of curls that made him look less than intimidating.

"Spike..." Angel warned.

"What? You gonna get all King of Denial on me?" Spike demanded.

Angel sighed. He looked down, and then slowly inched behind his desk chair to hide the fact that the top button of his trousers was undone.

Buffy entered the room and spoke again with barely controlled fury. "I come all the way from Rome, and then find this, of all things..."

"Blondie bear, I can't believe you!" Buffy was interrupted by a rather high-pitched voice.

All three turned to the doorway to see Harmony standing there with her hands on her hips.

"Wha...? What the bloody hell is it now, Harm?"

"I mean, you and Angel... ew... he's the boss! Okay, he's not your boss, so I sort of get that it's different. And then I find out that you're the Slayer's boyfriend! That's... ugh."

"Spike is NOT my boyfriend!" Buffy said vehemently.

"Really?" Harmony seemed to think on that for a while. Then she exclaimed, "If it's not Spikey, then... you're back together with Angel! Isn't that, like, dangerous? 'Cause, you know, he might lose his soul and turn into a total bastard who'll probably dock my pay or something, 'cause Spikey always said he was a real tightwad..."

"What?! I did not get back together with Angel. How does your stupid brain come up with this stuff?"

Harmony looked confused. "He's not your boyfriend? Then what's your problem?"

Angel sighed again. Spike snickered. Buffy seemed dumbfounded. "Huh?"

Harmony rolled her eyes. "Duh! If Spikey isn't your boyfriend, and Boss-y isn't either, then what gives you the right to be mad at them? They're both single. And, hey, I heard you were dating that Immortal guy."

Buffy pursed her lips. She scowled and walked out.

"Rude much?" Harmony muttered, as her eyes followed the Slayer's abrupt departure, before she returned to her own desk.

Spike groaned. "I need a drink." Then his gaze fell on Angel. Raising an eyebrow, he curled his tongue behind his teeth. "Or maybe you got something better?"

Angel frowned.

Spike's face fell, and he turned away.

"Not here," Angel said quietly. Then he looped an arm round Spike's neck, and hauled him off toward the private elevator which led to his penthouse apartment.

"Ow!" Spike yelped. Then, "Oh."

They didn't make it to the penthouse.

the end