"Come to bed, Obi-Wan."
The dark form loomed
above him, blocking out the stars. Obi-Wan had heard his master's
steady tread, rustling through the grass towards him, heavy boots crushing
the tender stalks, but had lain still and silent. He needed this.
His Master needed this. Obi-Wan was content to wait.
* * *
Now Qui-Gon was waiting.
He'd finally found Obi-Wan lying on on his cloak on the dew-damp ground,
hands clasped loosely on his belly. Perhaps he was meditating.
Qui-Gon grimaced
tiredly, trying to brush aside his impatience. His Padawan had certainly
picked the wrong moment to come out here and put his lessons into practice.
He was bone weary, and was looking forward collapsing into bed. It
had been a hard few weeks and before that a hard few months. He just wanted
to sleep, to share the comfort of his young lover's body for a few short
hours. Traipsing accross a moonlit paddock in search of an errant Padawan
was not what he had been looking forward to.
Obi-Wan's eyes seemed
fixed on the sky above him. Did he see some threat? Curious, Qui-Gon tilted
his head upwards. Two moons, both small. A few high clouds. Stars. Several
satellites silently winking. A local transport ship, blue and red navigation
lights burning softly, heading towards the spaceport. Qui-gon blinked,
his eyes gritty with exhaustion. He could see nothing unremarkable.
"What are you doing
Obi-Wan?"
"Sshhhh..." Obi-Wan's
voice seemed to come from far away. "Listen."
Qui-Gon listened,
serenity rapidly fraying at the edges. Was there danger here? The night
was quiet, but as he strained his ears he realised it was far from silent.
He heard the faint hum of a distant hovercar. A night bird woo-wooped
in the distance. More faintly he caught the clank of metal on metal and
the low muffled voices of the Ceremonial Guard at the Leader's rural retreat.
Shrill creaks from some indigenous amphibian population in the nearby river
sounded loud now that he was actually listening to them instead of just
hearing them as background noise. He could hear the thin whine of
some flying insect threading its way through the gentle blanket of sound.
Nothing unremarkable.
"I don't hear anything,
Padawan." It was a gentle reminder of his authority. "Come to bed."
Obi-Wan didn't shift
his gaze from the heavens.
"Master" he breathed,
acknowledging, but not moving to obey Qui-Gon's request. "Lie down next
to me."
Qui-Gon repressed
a sigh.
But Obi-Wan was not
to be denied, and Qui-Gon found he did not have the heart to over-ride
his Padawan's wishes and order him back to his sleeping quarters right
away. Repressing yet another tired sigh he dropped to his knees and
stretched himself out sideways alongside his Padawan.
"What is it, Obi-Wan?"
he asked, wearily.
"Look up, Master."
Obi-Wan's voice was distant. "Just look."
Qui-Gon lay back,
settling his head in the cradle of his hands, and looked up. It was
the same unremarkable sky he had noted earlier.
"What?" He allowed
a little of his impatience to creep into his voice. "What is it I'm
supposed to be looking at?"
"All of it."
It was almost too
much. Qui-Gon bit back an impatient response. He understood
Obi-Wan wasn't being deliberately vague. That wasn't his Padawan's
style. He must be in the grip of some powerful experience, and he wanted
to share that with Qui-Gon.
"Open your eyes,
Master."
"They are open, Obi-Wan."
"Look... harder..."
Qui-Gon forced himself
to relax, opening his eyes to take in the stars above, and as he did so
he began to open himself to the Force. The stars seemed to burn brighter,
and as he opened his mind, the connections betwen the stars seem to spring
into life. Each star glowed with its own light, and with the light
of the Force, seperate, and yet connected. Trails of Force energy blossommed
into being, weaving in between the stars until the glorious tapestry of
the Force filled his vision. Warp and weft. Each thread contributing
to the whole, and the beauty of the tapestry made Qui-Gon's breath catch
in his throat and his eyes begin to smart.
"You see?" Obi-Wan's
voice seemed to resonate now. Not distant, but reverberating with
the Force of the far-away stars. "It's so beautiful".
Qui-gon's stomach
clenched in response and an iron band seemed to tighten around his chest.
How could he have forgotten this?
"On Coruscant there
are so many stars." Obi-Wan's voice was so close now. "So many stars,
you can't see the distance between them. You can't see the individual
beauty of each star, and see how they dance amongst each other, each one
part of the whole, and yet seperate."
"I used to see it",
Qui-Gon rasped, his own voice now sounding to him as if it came from a
distance. How strange it seemed.
"I remember the stars
being like this" Obi-Wan continued, as if he hadn't heard his Master.
"I remember seeing the stars dance when I was very young, but you can't
see them at the centre, on Coruscant, where they are all so close together.
So many stars. You need to get a little further away."
Qui-Gon blinked away
the unshed tears. Obi-Wan was right. It was so beautiful.
How long was it since he had lain back and looked at the starlit sky in
awe? How long since he had listened to the sounds of a living planet
and felt the Force crackling amongst the grasses and the birds and the
trees and the insects, and really, really heard it all? Too long.
He had been so caught
up in his work. Oh yes, he had felt the Force. It was there for him
every waking moment. He had seen it sparkling in every living thing, heard
it whispering to him throughout the hard, hard months of talks and palaces
and diplomatic missions, in negotiations and meetings. He had felt
it gathering him in its encompassing arms every time he made love to Obi-Wan.
But for how long had he been taking it for granted whenever he needed to
call upon it? It came so easily to him, he had grown used to being surrounded
by the Living Force, the connection always strong and vibrant. But
when had he stopped just gaping in wonder at the sheer beauty of it all?
This. This
was why he was a Jedi. Not for respect or power. Not because
he wanted to right all the wrongs in an unjust universe, the desire for
justice a banked fire he knew still burned in his heart. It had been
for the sheer glory and beauty of the Force as it wove its magic through
every strand of life.
His focus had slipped
as he talked, charmed, cajoled and blustered his way through all those
interminable diplomatic duties. Trust Obi-Wan to show him the way back
again. Obi-Wan, who knew his heart almost better than he did.
Qui-Gon turned to
his Padawan, and breathed in deeply at the sight. Obi-Wan's mouth
lay slightly open, just begging to be kissed. He reached out, slipping
his hand under his Padawan's tunics until it rested upon the smooth muscled
belly beneath.
"How beautiful you
are to me, Obi-Wan" he breathed. "Thankyou for reminding me."
Obi-Wan turned to
him and smiled, and Qui-Gon could feel his own mouth twitching in response.
He leaned over, breathing in his Padawan's breaths, covering the velvet
of those lips with his own. And just before his Padawan's lashes
veiled his eyes he saw them, deep within the midnight of his Padawan's
eyes. Stars.
[the end]
26.02.01