Title: Bon Appétit
Summary: It's been a slow day in the office. Ianto is bored.
Rating/Warning: T for general Torchwood-iness
Disclaimer: Nope, still don't own Torchwood I'm afraid.
Word count: 279
A/N: I hope none of you are eating whilst reading this. My apologies if you are :P
~~TWTWTW~~
"Ianto, what the bloomin' heck is that?"
The suited man removed his safety goggles and face mask and looked up from the mysterious, most un-appetising substance. "That, Gwen, is Janet's lunch."
"Eww…" She wrinkled her nose in disgust and held down the sickness rising in her throat. "Why are you examining it?"
Two little frown lines appeared between his eyebrows, "I can't work out what would be a better garnish: a sprig of parsley or a pinch of basil…"
"You mean… that hasn't… I thought it had come out the other end…"
"Nope," Ianto said surely, "This is her lunch pre-digested. She's yet to eat it. I'm just putting the finishing touches to it." He straightened up and continued to study the dish with a deep intensity, a spray of leaves gently clutched in each hand.
"Ohh," Gwen choked, "That is disgusting! Remind me never to eat beef curry ever again…!"
"Beef curry? Oooh, is it lunch time yet? I'm starving!" Captain Jack Harkness' head suddenly popped up behind Gwen's left shoulder. "Mmm," he said, looking down, "Appetising!"
"Eurgh!" She turned and headed towards the door, looking slightly green around the gills, "If anyone needs me, I'll have my head over a bucket…"
Jack gave a little shrug and grinned broadly at Ianto, a devilish look in his eye, "And there was me about to say that she didn't have a sense of humour-"
A few moments later, a voice drifted down the corridor, "You evil bastards! Just 'cause you knew what I'd packed for lunch…!"
"Would you like parsley or basil with your beef curry…?"
A rude hand gesture suddenly appeared around the corner of the door frame.