CSI: Miami
Lab Rat Do-No-Morez
By A. Rhea King

1) What is This Humor You Speak Of?

Author's Note: Just like the franchise, spin-offs happened. While you're waiting for the next chapter, where the fun really begins, you should check out Roolz:: Things A Lab Rat is Not Allowed To Do (Anymore) [CSI], and Roolz:: CSI and Lab Rat NoNo's (CSI:NY). Even if neither are your favorite show, they'll give you a chuckle!!

Horatio had been gone for over three weeks, leaving his team to fend for themselves.

He had pursued a man who had raped and murdered his own daughter to New York City and teaming up again with Detective Taylor catch the man. He'd called the afternoon to tell Calleigh the man was caught, and he'd be on the first red-eye home.

And suddenly everything changed.

He called her first thing that morning, said he'd put in for five days of time off, and he would possibly be out of reach but didn't know for sure. She wouldn't tell Ryan, or Jesse, or anyone else in the lab, but that worried her. It wasn't like Horatio to just take days off when there wasn't a reason. To her knowledge there wasn't any.

But the strange part was the phone. He never turned off his phone. Not even when Ryan and Dave told him it kept his phone healthy to turn it off for a few minutes a day. But when she'd tried to call him for the last three days, it kept going to voice mail. He did call her back, but it was an hour or so later.

She'd asked if he was looking at new equipment. He laughed. She knew that laugh. She'd asked a ridiculous question, but he'd never tell her, and he'd never make her feel silly about it. He'd just laugh like that, and tell her he'd bring her up to speed when it was time. That was exactly what happened. And then he was gone again. She almost gasped when Ryan suggested Horatio was taking a vacation! That had to be it, but it was his first vacation since she'd met him! Suddenly, she wasn't so worried. She was happy for him. He'd found something interesting in New York, something that didn't involve criminals or death or mayhem, and he was relaxing.

After that revelation, she was content to let him have his 'me' time.

She was thinking that as she drove along the interstate on her way home. Her phone rang. She reached up at the top of her steering wheel and tapped a button turning on his Bluetooth speaker on his steering wheel.

"Hello?"

"Hello, Calleigh," Horatio replied.

She smiled. "Hi. How's New York?"

"Interesting. Have I missed anything?"

"No. We've held down the fort. Are you coming back soon?"

"Yes. I am. I need you to do me a favor tomorrow on your break or lunch."

"Sure. What's up?"

"Look around the building for a room that as secluded as you can find. Maybe start at the back of the first floor, or down near the morgue. A room that would be big enough for seven people but not be too cramped."

She smiled. Add this to the strangeness of this entire event.

"Oh— Okay. Can I ask why?"

"Nope. I'll let you in on it when it's time."

"Horatio, what are you doing? You've been so… Secretive since you finished the case."

Horatio was silent a moment. Then he told her, "With everything I've seen, and everything I've experienced, Calleigh, it's hard for me to be surprised."

"But something did?"

"Yes."

"Something for the lab?"

"Yes."

"My request for the Bullet Test Tubes went through and we can expect them any day?"

He let out a soft 'ridiculous question' laugh. "No."

She smiled. "Oh. All right. But you can't blame a girl for trying to get new toys. I love new toys."

"I know you do. I hope you'll find this better."

"Okay. Will your phone be on tomorrow?"

"It will. But let's keep that between us."

She smiled. "Our secret. I'll let you know what I find."

"Thank you. Good-bye." And without a sound, he was gone.

She smiled. There was something she'd heard in that conversation. Something she hadn't heard in many years since she began working with him. Wonder. Whatever he'd found, it had left him full of it. He was actually excited to bring it back to his team – whatever it was.