Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy: Late Night Talk show

"Hello everybody!" said Harry to the crowd of the Late Night Talk Show. "Welcome to the Late Night Talk show with yours truly, me!!!!!!!!!!!

(Sudden deathly silence)

"And my brilliant (with a hint of sarcasm) partner, Draco Malfoy."

(Crowd Screams)

"To Start, I would just like to regard all those who have come out tonight and those who actually use their TV's for something worth while other than trying to jump into your television set and hoping to appear on the screen, MR. WEASLY!" Yelled Harry to the camera while coughing madly in the most artificial way possible and nearly standing on the desk.

Mr. Weasly watching the program at home: "Hey you would have never known it wasn't possible to do that until I tried it myself!"

Mrs. Weasly: "Quiet Arthur, you still have a headache from that and it was only three days ago, you don't want it to get worse!"

Mr. Weasly: "Alright dear."

"Now then", continued Harry calmly. "Tonight, Draco and I will be discussing whether witches and wizards under 16 should be able to drink Fire whisky... legally"

"We will?" questioned Draco quietly while sitting next to Harry.

"Yes Draco, we will. Moooohahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!" Responded Harry with a rather unnecessary maniacal laugh.

"Was that necessary?" Asked Draco, confused and slightly frightened.

"It always is." Replied Harry. "It always is."

"OK?" Said Draco, again in a confused tone of voice. "Well, anyway, let's begin!! Hahahahahaaaa!!"

"Was that necessary?" Asked Harry.

"It always is." Replied Draco. "It always is."

"Hey that's not fair! That is my catch phrase! Get your own!"

"Oh well!"

"You're mean!"

"You've just noticed"

"Wow! Now you're meaner!"

"Meaner? Meaner!? Meaner isn't a word, genius!"

"Shut up! I'm cool like that!"

"I, quite frankly don't see how you're cool at all!"

"Now your even mea... I mean... more mean than before! Hey, that sentence had three means in it, isn't that funny, well really two means and a half, or was it two means and three quarters..."

(Everyone in the audience and Draco simultaneously) "SHUT UP!!!"

"Not until you do first!"

"No! You should shut up first!"

"And what if I don't want to?"

"Then I might have to share a certain shrieking shack story with the crowd" (Draco smiling sinisterly)

"You wouldn't!!?"

"I would."

"Come now Draco, lets not be rash here. We can talk about this" (Harry nervously chuckling)

"Oh I'm sorry, but it is too late for negotiations. Hmhmhmhmhm. And I'm thinking of having any mercy when I explain to the entire wizarding world the events that occured at the shrieking shack."

"YOU NEVER THINK AT ALL Malfoy!!!"

"SPEAK FOR YOUR SELF POTTER! I WASN'T THE ONE WHO SAID MEANER!"

"Meaner is a word, Wise guy!"

"No it isn't, Genius!"

"Check the dictionary!"

"Ok, If I'm right I have a year long right to call you idiot. If you're right, which will take a hell of a miracle, you have a year long right to call me idiot."

"OK!"

(1204 pages of the dictionary later...)

Draco: "Oh Crap!"

"You see, who's the idiot now!?"

(Draco mumbling lazily and reluctantly)

"I am."