The summer we shared fades away with the winter. Your hands were cold now...slower than icy veins, pushing me away. I knew it. I wanted…
I guess your love...wasn't so safe, the promise you made...You are the storm, the wind and the waves. You break me in two and toss me away. I fell apart when I fell for you. You are the water filing my lungs, killing me softly without a word. Without a word...
We had found him scrawling the words on a wall once, a few years ago. He wouldn't be taken away until he had finished. He was determined, even when he was being influenced by the fits of madness. He has a strange type of fervor, when his mind is gone. It makes him admirable, that he cares about something.
"You are bleak". That is you, Akito-sama.
None of us know if he knows what the words are, he doesn't seem to know enough English to understand. He has been known to "borrow" Hatori's books, perhaps he found one that taught him the language?
When Kureno saw the words, he understood enough of them, but he did not ask for the complete translation. He knew that if this is what god felt, then it was best to not interfere. We all know that the bird is different. He is more needed, yet less then anyone. But we don't understand…why He chose him.
"You are beautiful". That is you, Akito-sama. No matter what they say.
I don't think Shigure has seen the words, we try to keep him from them. I wonder what he will think, if he knows. Hatori has told us to wash it off the wall, but when god found out, he went into another fit. I think he wants to protect it, somehow. I have a scar to prove it, running down my left arm, where a knife slashed me, before Hatori and Kureno came to calm him.
I know more than many what happens, I may not know every secret, but if you are quiet, you will hear a lot. I don't think I will tell of these secrets, to anyone. But…the more I learn, the more I pity god.
He is handsome, feminine in it. He likes men, and cannot sleep well without one near him. He needs constant attention, he is jealous, but weak though he hurts many people. He fears becoming his mother, more than anything, I think. More than being left behind.
I know he loves Kureno and Shigure, which he loves more I don't know. He needs Kureno, when Shigure isn't near, which is most of the time, but seems to dread having to call on him. He keeps Hatori also near, but to be like a father, not a lover. He needs that, a father. He clings to these men, it almost scares me to see the ferocity. It isn't normal, for a man, but maybe it is for a god.
"Tired childish games, swept us all away". Sing it out, Akito-sama. You can let go now. " This is strange, this is wonderful". Its grip chokes me. I look up, and I see gods eyes, his saddened, angry eyes.
"What are you talking about? Who are you talking to? WHERE IS MY KURENO"? Akito-sama, Im sorry, I did not mean to hurt you also.
"I don't know, Akito-sama". It takes time. More than we have. So what have we done? Sing it out for all of us.
"I NEED KURENO. AHHHHHHH!" Akito starts screaming, he needs to. "Don't leave me! DON'T LEAVE!" We cannot leave. It takes time. Please tell me what we've done.
Kureno comes in, and hugs Akito, motioning for me to leave. I do quickly. I know what will happen, when Akito needs comfort. He finds it, letting go of the god for a moment, taking up the goddess, I should say. He becomes what she really is, a deprived girl child, and a lonely woman.
"Please tell me what have we done. Sing it out".
Voices come out as I walk away, his…her voice. She doesn't sing yet, she screams. "SHIGURE". Its what he wants, even now. Kureno will be sad later, I think. He will not sing out, as a bird, I know.
"Sing it out". Sing for all of us.