PG 132

Author's Notes:

Ask my mom – I am the world's best procrastinator. I was supposed to write a new chapter for my story "Finding Him", but I wrote a new chapter for my story "The Burning Man" instead, which was supposed to be a one-shot. When I finished that, I tried writing the chapter, but I just wasn't feeling it. So this story was born! (I'm always more creative when I'm procrastinating.)

I've been kicking this idea around for a couple days, but I really wanted to finish my other chapter first. (Putting off one project is often useful and helpful, but putting off two at once is just stupid.) So anyway, I love Angela Weber. Go humans! I thought it would be cool to hear from her, because I feel like Angela has always known something is up with the Cullens. So enjoy this – you don't get many fanfictions about her!

Disclaimer: If I owned Twilight –Edward would be with Rosalie, Emmett with Alice, Bella wouldn't exist, and Jasper would be MINE! Actually, I take it back about Bella. She can be with Jacob. Anyway… I… do… (You know you have to say it) notowntwilight. [SOB]

Perception

Chapter One: Girl Time

Angela POV

"…Tendonitis. It just causes me too much pain to even think about writing…" Ben sighed dramatically.

I elbowed him playfully and laughed. "Liar! You're just too lazy to help a damsel in distress." I stuck out my bottom lip, pouting.

I was sitting on the roof outside my bedroom window, sharing a cherry popsicle with Ben Cheney, my boyfriend of about ten months. There had rarely been a day during that time where we hadn't seen each other, or at the very least talked on the phone. He had been over since this morning, teasing my eleven-year-old twin sisters and talking politics with my dad. My family loved Ben, so they were thrilled that he frequented our house.

Ben started tracing the popsicle around the edges of his lips absentmindedly. I laughed again. "That lipstick is so not your color, girl!" I teased.

He fluttered his lashes – which were hidden behind glasses –at me, and begin to speak in a high falsetto. "Oh Angela, help me! Make-up is so confusing, and I feel like I have to use it to impress the girl I like!"

The mood shifted abruptly. "You don't have to do anything special, Ben," I said softly, earnestly. "She's already impressed."

I closed my eyes and leaned in a little bit. His lips met mine, soft and pliable. It was a stretched-out peck, simple, but very, very sweet. We were both smiling when we pulled back. He gave my lips a quick tap again, then touched a finger to my mouth and licked it. I laughed. "You taste like cherries," he chuckled.

Ben took on the fake girly voice again to sing a few lines of an overplayed song from the radio. "I kissed a girl, and I li-iked it, the taste of her cherry chapstick…"

"Oh, don't start!" I groaned. Ben could go on like this for hours, finding a song to quote for every sentence I spoke. "Come on, Ben. Austin should get here soon." I started climbing through the window.

"Yeah," he agreed, his voice an odd mix of wistfulness and excitement. He followed me off the roof.

He stopped at my bedroom door. "You coming, Ang?" he asked, using his special nick-name for me.

"You go down, I just want to straighten up a little," I replied. "I'll just be a second."

Ben shrugged, and I heard him bounce down the stairs. I hurriedly plumped some pillows and aligned my blinds so the slats hung right. I rushed to my door – I wanted to say hi to Austin.

Rounding the curve in my hall, I heard Ben open the door and give a surprised "Hey, Bella!"

"Hi, Ben. Er, is Angela here?" Bella sounded anxious.

"Sure," Ben said, just as I cried "Bella!" and appeared at the top of the stairs.

I jumped just a little bit as a car pop!ped and backfired loudly. Was Austin here already?

"Austin's here!" Ben confirmed loudly. I ran down the stairs to wrap my arms around him once more before he left. Austin honked impatiently.

"I'll see you later," Ben promised. "Miss you already." My heart fluttered.

Without warning, Ben threw his arm around my neck and pulled my face down about six inches to kiss me ardently. My heart was suddenly pounding double-time in my chest as I twisted my fingers in his thick, black hair and inhaled his almost cinnamon-y aroma. His glasses were pushed to the side as my hands gripped the sides of his face.

Austin honked again, and Ben held up one finger to the open doorway. He stroked my cheek once more, and then pulled back. We were both a little breathless.

Ben straightened his glasses, gave me a little wave, and nipped out the door. "Bye, Ang! Love you!" he shouted, grinning. I heard Austin's teasing "Ooooh!" as Ben yanked open the car door. Ben punched him on the arm, and they both laughed.

I swayed a little bit. He was just so… so… wonderful. I loved him as much as loved my family, more than the earth itself. Everyone says that high school relationships didn't last, but I don't believe it. I know I sound like every other naïve, infatuated teenager when I say that he feels like the one, but he does. He's sweet, and kind, and caring, and I know that he loves me more than anything else. He treats me like I'm the most important person on earth, and he tells me that, to him, I am.

"Thank you for doing this, Bella," I said as the blush faded from my cheeks. "From the bottom of my heart. Not only are you saving my hands from permanent injury, you also just spared me two long hours of a plot-less, badly dubbed martial arts film." Where was the allure of movies like that? They held absolutely no interest for me, though they enthralled Ben and Austin.

"Happy to be of service." Bella smiled, but something was off about the action. She seemed tense and almost guilty. Hmmm.

I led her upstairs to my room, kicking toys out of the way as I went. My four-year -old brother's balls were everywhere, and my sisters had dumped a puzzle out – the pieces littered the hallway.

Bella noticed the abnormal quiet. "Where's your family?" she asked.

"My parents took the twins to a birthday party in Port Angeles." I shifted a particularly large stuffed animal to the edge of the hall as we neared the end of it. "I can't believe you're really going to do this. Ben's pretending he has tendonitis." I made a face as I opened the door.

"I don't mind at a–" Bella gasped as she entered my room and saw the stacks of envelopes looming threateningly from every flat surface.

I grimaced apologetically at her.

"I thought you were exaggerating," Bella admitted.

Nope. Now she knew why Ben had weaseled out. "I wish. Are you sure you want to do this?"

"Put me to work," she smiled. "I've got all day." Again, that guilty tone. What was up?

I divided a stack of envelopes in half and set the address book and a pile of graduation announcements in front of us, along with some kinko's copies of my senior pictures. I was curious about Bella's odd attitude, but I didn't push her. For a while, the only sound was our pens scratching across the paper. I enjoyed the silence.

"What's Edward doing today?" I asked after a few minutes. That usually got Bella talking.

"Emmett's home for the weekend. They're supposed to be hiking." She dotted an "i" with unnecessary vigor.

Supposed? "You say that like you're not sure."

Bella shrugged. What was going on? She'll talk if she wants to, I reminded myself. Don't push her.

When I first met Bella, I sensed that she had a lot to deal with. I told myself that it was to be expected, she was the new student. I figured it would fade with time. But throughout the year, it seemed to get more and more pronounced. She wasn't unhappy – she positively glowed some days – but all the same, she seemed to know some secret that most people didn't, and although she hid it well, I could see.

And then last September… when he had left… Bella closed up, drew in on herself. No one could touch her in the abyss she resided in, the black hole that had sucked up her soul had no intention of spitting it back out. I began to suspect, late at night, that the secret Bella was dealing with had something to do with the Cullens. It all fit – they were so obviously unnatural, and they were Bella's life. When they left, when the secret her life became no more than a disturbing, fading dream, wouldn't it affect Bella bone-deep?

And when they came back, my suspicions intensified. I was hard-pressed to find Bella ever looking sad or worried. It was like the life had been pumped back into her the moment they set foot on Washington soil.

And then there was the Cullens themselves. Had they always been so… gorgeous? They were charming, and I liked them. But my inferences became more and more frequent and, I suspected, accurate. They were always absent on sunny days, and they never ate. The grace with which they carried themselves, the things that they just seemed to know, their unusual, refreshing personalities, and the shocking carefulness with which they treated Bella were all neon signs, telling my subconscious that they were something above and beyond the norm. Of course, the physical differences couldn't be overlooked either. They were heartbreakingly graceful, especially to a girl like me, who had devoted most of her childhood to the art of ballet. They were always the first to every class, and they opened the door for everyone to leave the room the moment the bell rang signaling the end of class. They were obviously super-model material in the beauty department, and I swore that their eyes were not always the same color. They ranged from butterscotch gold to tar-black, then back to gold.

I had surmised a long time ago that they were not, well, human. It sounded silly, so I didn't share my suspicions, but I continued to speculate.

So they were not normal. That much was clear. However, what they really were remained to be seen.

We worked silently for a while, but Bella seemed almost unbearably guilty. I didn't want to watch my friend go through that, so I finally spoke up.

"Is something wrong?" I asked carefully. "You seem… anxious."

She grinned sheepishly at me. "Is it that obvious?"

Yes. "Not really."

We were quiet for a few heartbeats, but the conversation was obviously unfinished. "You don't have to talk about this unless you want to," I assured her. "I'll listen if you think it will help."

The conflict was evident on her face. She looked like she truly wanted to vent but… couldn't. Maybe she'd tell me why? Those notions faded when she didn't speak for a while.

"I'll mind my own business," I promised, smiling down at the envelope I was addressing.

"No," she said, startling me. "You're right. I am anxious. It's… it's Edward."

Edward? This couldn't be good… and yet, I reasoned, it couldn't be bad either, because I'd seen Bella when times were bad, and she was positively dapper now compared to that. "What's wrong?"

She looked at me like she was sincerely thankful for someone to talk to. "Oh, he's mad at me."

"That's hard to imagine," I said. This wasn't what I expected. "What's he mad about?"

Bella sighed. "Do you remember Jacob Black?"

"Ah." Boys. Everything was a competition.

"Yeah." She sighed again, so I pressed on to confirm my suspicions.

"He's jealous."

Bella looked like she was regretting starting this conversation in the first place. "No, not jealous… Edward thinks Jacob is… a bad influence, I guess. Sort of… dangerous. You know how much trouble I got in a few months back… it's all ridiculous, though."

Hmmm. I didn't care what Edward said about Jacob being "dangerous", that just didn't fit. I shook my head. "Bella, I've seen how Jacob Black looks at you. I'd bet the real problem is jealousy."

"It's not like that with Jacob," Bella defended, blushing.

"For you, maybe. But for Jacob…" Jacob looked at Bella like, like, I don't know, like she was a prize to be won. And he wasn't going to stop until she was his.

Bella frowned as she saw the truth in this. "Jacob knows how I feel. I've told him everything."

"Edward's only human, Bella." I wasn't completely sure of that, but this wasn't the time. "He's going to react like any other boy."

Bella grimaced, and I patted her hand. She was obviously having a hard time with the unusual feeling of not being in harmony with Edward. I patted her hand consolingly. "He'll get over it."

"I hope so," Bella replied, with the corners of her mouth turned down. "Jake's going though kind of a tough time right now. He needs me."

My mind flashed back again to that dark time, where Bella wasn't… there. I had tried to help, but I couldn't touch her. The emotional prison she was trapped in had bars on the window – Bella could reach out of them if she wanted, but my fingers wouldn't fit through; I couldn't touch her until she chose to let me.

And then Jacob appeared in her life, and he suddenly had the keys to her cell. He opened the door, and then coaxed her out into the light one step at a time. If it wasn't for him, I don't know what Bella would have been. A shell, an empty box – a pretty exterior, but nothing inside.

"You and Jacob are pretty close, aren't you?" I noted.

"Like family," she agreed.

"And Edward doesn't like him… that must be hard." Adding to Bella's already heavy load. "I wonder how Ben would handle that?" I mused.

She smiled, looking a little bit indulgent. "Probably just like any other boy."

I grinned, too. "Probably."

I sensed that the subject was closed, and abruptly brought the conversation around to college, majors, dorm assignments, and the like. The rest of our two hours passed happily, with us chatting away like the teenage girls we were.

Ben and I made spaghetti for my family got back – we were contemplating eating it with syrup, candy, and pop-tarts like they do in the twins' favorite movie, but eventually opted for a more traditional Italian Sausage sauce. Ben sang along to the CD of music from the Opera Figaro while we worked, which made me laugh and set the scene nicely. We even danced to some of the more romantic songs on the linoleum floor of my kitchen.

I lay down to sleep perfectly content that night – I had never known I could be this happy until I met Ben. Every moment with him was a gift, every kiss made me so weightless I felt like I was stealing wings from the birds.

I reviewed every moment of my day, as I always did, lingering on the Ben parts.

But when I reached Bella, those unshakable suspicions lodged themselves in my brain, and refused to leave until they were considered.

I spent the rest of my waking moments speculating away over the Cullen family. I reviewed what I already knew, thought about the way they reacted to normal people versus how they acted around each other, and mulled over the many ways their lives were intertwined with Bella's.

When sleep finally overtook me, it found me with a vague, fuzzy memory playing itself in my head. I felt like something had just clicked for me, but it was so late, and I was tired… what had that Quileute kid said?

I lost the battle with my hippocampus; the memory was just a movie in a busy room, on a blurry screen that no one was watching. Maybe it would come back to me later… what the Cullens were…

Author's Notes:

I know that Angela got pretty far along in her musing, but she won't remember in the morning, and if you'll remember, Edward is somewhat… occupied… at the moment, so I don't think that there would be any reason for the Cullens to disappear. Yes, they know that Angela is aware of their status as "more-that-a-human-being", and they know that she is trying to figure it out, but she doesn't know enough yet for them to be worried.

I have several possible Angela scenes I would like to do, but only if I get lots of reviews asking me to update!

Puh-lease? Pretty, pretty, please review? It only takes about 2 minutes of yours, but it makes my whole day!

Thanks for reading, and watch for updates!