If Only I'm Not the Chosen
Finished:12-9-09
A/N: I couldn't upload anything lately due to a certain problem, but thankfully it's all right now. As usual, all of the names mentioned belonged to Namco. I only own the plot of this fic. Enjoy.
Raine tapped the table enthusiastically. Her lips turned into a light smile." Kids, let's start our class!" Regal glanced to Lloyd, who glanced to Collete. Late realization struck Lloyd and eventually he fell from his chair." Are you okay, Lloyd?" asked Regal politely, although he also couldn't help not to laugh a bit." Uh, yeah, thanks, Regal." He switched to Raine." What's this so sudden, Professor?" Raine grinned, her hands explored the features of the wooden desk. Her desk she long to see, the class she missed a lot." We didn't have enough time in our journey, but your education mustn't allowed to stop. Besides, now when we got our class again, don't you think it's a perfect chance?"
The villagers had cancelled their banishment, furthermore recover their facilities again. They even let Raine teaches children if she has a time, something Raine felt grateful of. She flipped her textbook, caught a sight that her students weren't at their good condition for studying. Sheena almost driven into the dreamland; Staring half asleep to the window while Zelos hummed an unknown tune for himself. He obviously didn't heard Raine's words.
"Everyone, including Zelos and Sheena, excluding Regal." Sheena awakened and answered tiredly," Okay then. "Zelos stopped his hum and, for once, really paid attention to Raine. " Today's topic is 'If only I'm not….', Write a composition about it. I'll wait outside, expect me in a hour. Very well, good luck for you."
"If only I'm not what, Professor?" Lloyd raised his hand bluntly." That's what I want you to discover, but for a general explanation, it's some sort of telling what if things happened not like they supposed to so you're not what you are today. Got it?" She took her pen and write them on the whiteboard." I'm not really understand, but I think it's worth a shot." Whispered Zelos to Lloyd.
Lloyd pierced Genis' shoulder with his pencil right after Raine vanished from his eyes. "Ouch! What're you doing, Lloyd?" Genis massaged his shoulder softly." Tell me, what kind of story do you write? Mine will be "If only I'm not human." Cool, isn't it? " Genis rolled his eyes." It's out of questions, I think. If you insist, mine is 'If only I'm not a half elf.' Happy? Now stop bothering me." Lloyd added in a low voice, "Sheeesh, I'm sorry."
"Then, how about you, Sheen?" Sheena answered him, face glued to her paper," If only I'm not a Mizuho" then cast Lloyd in a silence. He disappointedly walked back to his chair," You're boring. Why everyone need to be so serious, Right, Coll…" his sentence paused midway. He didn't bother to finish it upon seeing Collete also drown in her thoughts.
"Oh, Brother. Guess I'll work on mine." He scratched a few lines to the pure white paper. It looks good with some words written, he thought. I wonder what will Colette write? Across his desk Collette's neat handwritten words filled the paper slowly. She knew for sure what she need to write.
Zelos pushed his body against the chair, pretty much rambling with his inner self what to note down. There's one topic floating in his mind, but writing about it is certainly not a pleasant thing to do. It is intimately related to his most hated thing. His title. At his last sigh, he put his courage to his hand.
Both chosen's paper now filled with lines of words building paragraphs, with a same title. If only I'm not the chosen.
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If only I'm not a chosen, then I must be free from this golden cage.
I'll be able to make friends with everyone, not having this iron wall around me.
I can be myself, the one I like without being bordered.
I can see this world as something I treasured, not the place I need to sacrifice myself for.
I won't have this uneasy feelings, that I valued my own life more than this world.
A failure I cannot paid with my soul
And I can love you,
I can tell my feelings for you, without this guilt lingering within my chest.
I can express how much I cared about you, honestly.
Things I can only dream of
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If it's not for this damn title, I'll live peacefully.
I won't have this unwanted birth.
I won't wear this silly mask, a façade for myself.
Having a little sister, even only half.
Having a normal family,
Having you.
I don't need to push you away, instead draw you near.
As a normal person, another life in this cycle of nature.
Not as a token of forced hope.
I can tell every words I long to say,
The simple yet powerful words,
I love you.
You're my one and only.
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Colette stared at Lloyd's back, smiling sadly. Every words is true. As painful as it can be, she wrote more.
The flame hair waved between the soft gestures of the wind. His eyes were set at her innocent face. She was too busy so she couldn't feel she was watched with such intensity. Her purplish hair covered half of her face, furthermore prevent her to make out.
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Still, it was the only reason I can met you.
The greatest blessing in my life,
The pillar of my courage.
It showed me this path,
With you and everyone.
Everyone loved me so much,
For once in my life, I'm grateful with my conditions.
I will save this world with my own hands, facing my weakness
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I'd like to say thank you as much I hate to admit it.
Because it brought me to you.
Don't you think it's a destiny that we crossed each other's lane?
I'm here even if you never notice my feelings.
For this bunch of weirdo you gave me also.
Weird, but caring, who give me friendship and trust I once believed I won't have
I never imagine them to be my grounds to fight, to set an end in this war.
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"Finished?" Collete gasped. She has been too concentrated in her writings and failed to notice Raine's appearance. She's not alone. The whole class lifted their head, every single one of them shown a surprised reaction albeit a slight differences." Submit it."
Collete gasped. She forgot at all it's a class assignment , so she wrote every single personal feelings as she did in her journal. Zelos slapped his forehead. That's certainly not the kind of things he wanted to share freely, nor submit it to Raine.
A loud protest came from Lloyd. He wasn't finished yet. But before she could talk any longer, a messenger from the village arrived. "Renegades brought some news" She said. Raine sighed. "All right. Expect me to be there soon." He nodded and left.
"I shall turn this back to you. I'm sure we'll find another time." She handed their papers, carefully skimming over it. Her lips turned into a sly curve when she see a very same sentence at the end of every paper.
If I ever have any chance to turn back time and allowed to choose, I'll choose my current self.
A/n: Blame me if you think the ending is lame. I lost my original idea, as the result of abandoning it for a quite long time. No wonder why my Muse got angry and refused to help me. Please left me a note, so I can fix this fic.
Good day,
Moonlight Melody