The New Moon's Eclipse on the Twilight of My Emotional Breaking Dawn, Because Sometimes Things Are Just Too Hard and I Knew That I Would Die Without Him [an excerpt from the end of all things]
"Now I am become death, the destroyer of worlds." – Krishna, The Bhagavad Gita
'I could see Jacob staring at my delicious baby from across the room, his ripped abs ripping their way through his ripped T-shirt, strewn raggedly across his pumped chest, bulging with thick muscle. I gasped at his rippedness, and then Edward walked in.
I jumped up, clumsily upsetting Edward's perfect coffee table, perfect like he was, but a monster, and spilling dark coffee onto the floor. I watched it pool beneath me, a dark mirror of my own emotions. Even being a vampire hadn't cured me of some things.
Edward leapt at me, and I was in his arms. Jacob scowled from above us as we lay in the pool of coffee and glass. Even as I gazed over Jacob's intense rippage, made somehow more playful by his hatred, I couldn't help but notice that Edward's flawless skin was smouldering like a hot frozen cold molten explosion of scalding jizz, I mean venom, like the feeling of his first bite that day in the dance studio when his unforgettably faultless arms had swept me up and out of the way of James and landed me in bed with him watching over me in hospital.
But now, things were different.
"Edward! How could you?" I shrieked hysterically, referring to the minor graze on my elbow.
"Bella, you know I couldn't hurt you," he spoke manily.
"Yes, but you have now." growled Jacob, his words bitter and filled with agony.
"You stay out of this, dog." Edward hissed back. "She made up her mind about you."
There was anguish in his pained voice of hurt that tore open the hole in my chest.
Ignored, Renesme started crying, broken glass jutting out of her side from her fall from the coffee table. But what did she know of love and the pain of living forever? How could she?
How could she know what it felt like to have the heart of the one you love ripped out from underneath you, like an emotional table napkin on the metaphorical stage of some two-bit magic show? But this magic show was my life, and Edward was my pale alabaster marble magician of icy whiteness and ice and stuff.
"Renesme!" Edward exclaimed unnecessarily.
I felt my jealousy rising as he turned to my offspring.
"Get away from her, bloodsucker!"
Jacob bounded muscularly over to Renesme, shirt long gone. He grabbed Renesme just before Edward could.
"That's my daughter, hound!"
"That's my wife, bat-man. Actually, Batman sounds kind of cool. Um. Leech." Jacob misspoke adorably.
The door bust open dramatically for the second time.
"What's happening in here?"
It was my evil father Charlie, cruelly protective as always and trying to get me away from Edward with his superficial attempts at fatherhood.
"Go awaaayyy dad" I whined gratingly.
"No Bells. Not until I know that you're safe."
Renesme started crying louder.
"And your baby- Jacob?" Charlie cut off, confusion playing in his voice like the immense pain playing in my heart. How could he turn to her at a time like this? Couldn't he see that I needed him?
"What?" Jacob snapped, Renesme struggling in his arms. His belt was undone and a sizable bulge jutted eagerly beneath his boxers. Jacob was like a startled beast. Only this time, his corner was a relationship, and his rotting gazelle carcass of love was my daughter.
"Can't you understand anything? She told me it was alright!" he shouted.
"Not so fast, Pete Pervie Pants." Charlie quipped, drawing his revolver.
Jacob and Edward made various animal noises.
"I'm warning you Jake," my father said, his tone changing to match the fascist that he really was, "If you don't put down that infant, I will arrest you. Whether your father's my friend or not."
I couldn't believe my ears. How could Charlie be so callous?
"How could you be so insensitive to his feelings?" I demanded of my parent.
"They're in love!" I shouted, and Edward rested a cold hand on my shoulder.
"Be still, love."
I complied to his will as my master unquestioningly, just as all women should in this day and age of immorality, and watched Charlie's expression become more bewildered.
"She's your child."
Renesme wail brought us back to her selfish attention seekinng. Her baby clothes were off and Jacob's wolf-meat was in glorious bloom, slender and large. He lowered Renesme to it slowly, tip touching her delicate rose as the pitch of her cries rose higher.
"STOP NOW!" thundered Charlie, cocking his pistol.
Jacob roared at Charlie without reason and began to push the bell of his throbbing longinus into Renesme. Her wailing reached a fever pitch, a near typhoon of song.
"Right"
The first shot rang out, catching my Jake under his boyish left pec, making him yelp muscularly. Edward leapt at Charlie, but it was already too late, the bullet had done its work.
Renesme stopped wailing, and began seizing in a delirious fit. Jake had released her when the bullet hit, and she had been deflowered fully by his canine phallus. She rocked on it, swaying like a two-bit rodeo cowboy on the back of a wild bull. There was blood on Jake's jeans.
"How could you?" I jabbered.
"Oh my God!" gasped Charlie, more of a monster than any vampire, "Someone call a doctor. Renesme?"
"Can't you see that she loved him?" I asked the merciless brute I called my father.
Renesme jerked into paralysis, the paralysis that only seeing your love shot could conjure, and I knew that my claim was validated.
Then I smelt it: A mouth-watering scent, unlike anything else. Not as sublime as Edward, but almost as good. Then I realised. It was my daughter's blood. I didn't think I was going to be able to help myself.
Edward saw me poised to leap grabbed me. I struggled in his arms.
"Oh Jesus, oh Jesus fuck" Charlie muttered to himself, beginning to panic.
I was stronger than Edward and I was terrified to find that I was winning. I pushed out two words before the redness took me.
"Dis-tract… Me…."
I heard his [synonym for perfect] voice.
"You know what you're asking me to do?"
I nodded, not seeing or smelling anything but that blood.
And then he pulled down his pantaloons.
A sculpture of hewn marble, an artful challenge to even Michelangelo erupted from his loins.
There was an awful sound. A rending and a tearing of ligaments and muscle. Through my blood-haze I saw Jacob beginning to turn and screamed with the knowledge of what was going to happen.
Jacob exploded into wolf form, totem pole included. Renesme burst open. Then, there were only two things in my life: The bright white pillar and the dark tanned mast.
Two poles hovered in darkness, circling each other like twin suns in a place without light, without shade, without greyness. An absence drained the ether and loss called softly as a siren.
The first entered me from the front, pulling apart my lips and filling me entirely, making me gasp with pleasure. The totem travelled over hills and dale, into the cleft of no return and through the darkness into total ecstasy. The flood was coming.'
The words started out at Stephanie from the greasy screen of her dilapidated laptop. It seemed to have crusted itself over in a vain attempt to stop its misuse, like a German sniper turning on his own, but there was to be no bravery. She had gone beyond all things. Wiping the crumbs from her mouth, the Meyer-thing proceeded to the kitchen to ruminate on how she could finish her work. Outside the window, the high plains of Utah stretched to nothingness in all directions. On the wall, a cross hung upside-down and she kissed her husband's head beside it.
After draining a hot dish of butter and licking out the inside of the oven, she felt rejuvenated enough to return to her typing. She praised the Dark God for his prowess.
'The twin pillars met in the heart of me, fusing into line with all eternity and the universe itself seemed centred. I was gone. Instead there was only an infinite oneness and a far-reaching touch of the divine.
Edward and Jacob forced themselves into me harder and my mind soared higher than God to palaces in clouds and the holy light of pure knowledge. In my ears, angels dropped pure song.
I returned to hell.
Blood filled my nostrils, the living room transformed. Carlyle and Alice feasted on wet chunks of bone and my scream of coming climax twisted into horror.
"She's coming back," Edward cried desperately.
The light had changed to pink and black.
"Charlie!" he begged. "Do what you have to do!"
"Forgive me." I heard from my side, then the sound of a zipper and the thud of a revolver on the floor.
Charlie picked it up, erection swelling already, and fired off a round into the air.
"I'm sorry, Bells."
There were tears now. I'd never seen him cry. He stroked the side of my face and my mouth took him totally. This time there was nothing to see or hear.'
Stephanie snapped back to reality and noticed that it was the next day. The tap still dripped in the kitchen, but the flies had died down. She had to continue writing. The urge to visit the kitchen rose in her, but then she observed a cockroach on her cluttered desk. Perfectly patient, she wiggled into position and waited for her prey.
It crawled on the way down.
'The three of them wove into me, a tapestry of evil. The father, cheater, the ill fated lover, the harlot, the feasters, the love. An ancient incantation sounded and old runes scratched themselves into the particulous air. My three men and their three swords: a holy trinity.
When they came, they didn't stop. Time slowed. They seemed to tap a secret spring. The rite of some pagan fertility god, never meant to be uttered or ordered.
I was crammed together and broken by the impact. Whiteness filled the room in a blast worse than Hiroshima. My eardrums blew out and I felt it meet in my nose from within and without, then my brain-.'
On the peak of the highest mountain, Meyer waited. The crows had sung of what was coming. It was written. The Dark God knew.
A rumbling sounded in the distance, growing and then thundering in a bolt of sound like jetfighters screeching at a thousand pitches. She strained against the wind and the smell it brought. The first flecks of whiteness hit her cheeks like the first snowfall of winter.
On the far horizon, skyscrapers pierced the sky and then fell back into the white ocean. It rolled over the plains to Meyer and she called to it in her deafness.
Arms, cars, cattle, the souls of millions floated in the seed. It was unstoppable and it rose up before the mountain, turning to the face of the Dark God.
Meyer opened her lips and no sound escaped.
The wave broke and rolled on.