Infinite Possibilities: Time, Space, and All the Dimensions In-Between as Speculated by Nerds
Have fun. And remember: anything's possible.
Ron entered Bueno Nacho with an air of paranoia about him. He kept looking around the room, his eyes darting about like the furniture was circling him. Jumping around, dodging invisible projectiles and drawing curious looks from more than one of the customers already seated, he eventually made his way across the restaurant. He probably would have dove under the table had Felix not been parked there. Instead, Ron dove into a seat, making a yelping noise as he made an ungainly landing.
Felix blinked a couple of times; a handful of nachos halfway to his mouth started dangling a dangerous amount of cheese toward the table. The other hand came up over the table and pointed at Ron, who was still trying to sit back up, while his mouth opened a few times as if to say something, then shut again. After a few more seconds, he shrugged a little, thinking better of it before twisting the cheese over the nachos again. They were then shoved unceremoniously into his mouth.
"So," Felix began, his voice thick with cheesy goodness while Ron tried to flip his legs around to fit under the bench, "are you trying out for the Olympics or are those ninjas after you again?"
Eventually, Ron managed to drag himself into a sitting position, though he looked much the worse for wear. His shirt had gotten tangled on a slightly sharp piece of the table and torn a little; not enough to be too noticeable, but enough to definitely detract from his appearance. The large fringe of hair that was usually ungainly was even more untamed, some pieces sticking up at awkward angles. It also looked like he hadn't gotten a decent night's sleep in a while.
Several minutes passed, the only noise being Felix chewing on the nachos before letting out a large gulp. Then, suddenly, Ron grabbed him by the front of the shirt, pulled him part of the way onto the table, and proceeded to freak out.
"THE WORLD IS FALLING APART! I don't know what reality is anymore," Ron began lamenting loudly, drawing scandalized glares from most of the people in the restaurant.
"Uh…dude? Any chance you could, oh, I don't know, put me down before you start swinging your arms around in anguish?" Felix asked nervously; he felt very, very uncomfortable being out of his chair in the grip of a hysterical friend. Especially one that was into the dramatics.
"Oh! Uh, hehe…sorry," Ron replied sheepishly, setting his friend back down in his chair. After straightening himself in his seat (and noting that his nachos were now a new feature on his shirt), he grabbed some napkins off of the tray on the table and began to clean the cheesy goodness from his shirt.
"Now that that's taken care of and you've stopped screaming like you were at Wannaweep locked in the broom closet with the camp mascot, would you mind telling me what'd going on? What's with the panic attack?"
Ron took several deep breathes, trying to calm himself down more than he had already managed. Once the wheezing had quieted down, he turned to Felix and said, "I think the universe is collapsing around me."
"Ooookay…" Felix said slowly, an eyebrow raising higher as the word was stretched out. "So what brilliant deductive skills led to this conclusion?"
"Have you not been paying attention to the politics in the school as of late? Drew Lipsky, that blue guy, the guy that used to be me and Kim's arch-foe, is friends with KP. It. Does. Not. Make. Sense. It's like…like the school hierarchy has totally flipped around!" Ron ranted.
"Yes, because you and Kim being friends was so much saner. That's against the food chain, too, if you remember correctly," Felix countered.
"But…it doesn't make sense! I mean, what are the odds that I would mess with the machine just enough to make him sixteen? And what about Shego? Shouldn't she be worried or something? And where the heck did Rufus go?" Ron ran through the list of fairly valid complaints.
Across town, in the Smarty Mart pet section, Rufus is sitting down at a little table covered with a checkered tablecloth. The table is set with Italian cuisine and in the chair opposing him sat another naked mole rat. This one, however, had a bit of lipstick around its mouth. Rufus whistled and the other naked mole rat winked back.
Back at Bueno Nacho, Ron was finishing his rant.
"…and why why WHY is Kim tutoring him in English? Since when does Kim tutor? Huh?"
Felix finished listening to his rant, his head resting on his hands and nodding occasionally. He started to give his opinion on the thought once Ron had quieted down again.
"Have you ever heard the idea of multiple universes?" he began.
"Huh? What does that have to do with this weirdness?" Ron queried.
"Just bear with me, Ron. Now then, there's a school of thought that says that there are a near infinite number of universes out there. And each one is different. Some are majorly weird, like gravity is backwards or nothing exists. But some have just a few minor details changed," Felix said, talking in the manner of a professor teaching a student, "like, maybe, Bonnie would be at the bottom of the food chain."
"Or Monique could be a guy," Ron added, catching on to the idea.
"Or," Felix continued, starting to giggle, "Bonnie could be so desperate for the Ronshine that she pulls you into a closet and starts making out with you."
Now both of them were chortling, trying to keep their laughter from bothering other people.
"How about a universe where Kim and Shego have a fling and end up pregnant?" Ron said.
"Which one?"
"Both of them!" The lunacy that the statement presented to them kept them from staying quiet; now their laughter was ringing through the restaurant.
"Ohohoh! I know! A universe where myself and Josh are dating!" Felix practically yelled through his laughter. "I can see our wedding now: dark blues being the main theme, myself in a sharp black tux, Josh being led down the aisle by his mother…"
"What about one where I'm super-evil and try to take over the world for Nacos?" Both of them had trouble staying in an upright position now, grabbing their stomachs and gasping for air.
"Or how about one where we're sitting in Bueno Nacho, laughing about this stuff, and then we realize that we're in love?" Felix gasped as he tried to get air into his lungs. This stopped Ron's laughter cold. "Hey, dude, you okay?"
"Yeah…but I just…I think that's this dimension!" Ron said, his surprise as obvious as his belief.
"Whoa, seriously?" Ron nodded in reply. They sat there for a few minutes, trying to process the new data.
"So…what do we do now?" Felix asked slowly.
"We could try a kiss, maybe?" Ron suggested. They slowly leaned toward each other, nervous about looking good and hoping they weren't making fools of themselves to the other one. Ron was close enough to smell the cheese on Felix's breath…
A pair of fingers snapped in front of Ron's face.
"Hey, Ron, you kinda zoned out there for a second. You okay?" Felix asked, concerned. He pulled his hand away from his friend's face and waited for a response.
"Yeah…just had a weird thought," Ron answered with a faraway voice. "Where did we leave off?"
"You had just mentioned being super-evil?" Felix reminded him.
"Oh yeah! Hehe. Now THAT'S out there."
"Or what about you and Kim dating, huh? How weird would THAT be? Though I must admit, Kim's a catch…" Felix trailed off, nudging Ron's arm and wagging his eyebrows suggestively.
"Ew! Me and KP? Nuh-uh! That'd be like…like incest or something! No way!" Ron vehemently denied the idea with a shudder.
"Well, anyway, like I said, weirder things can happen. I mean, it's not like they're dating or anything like that," Felix said.
"It's kinda hard, you know? She's spending so much time with him…I feel left out." Ron's expression held slight heartache; not being able to be with his best friend was starting to get to him.
"You could always come over and bash some zombies with me," Felix suggested.
"That's not it. KP's been my friend since pre-K. I miss her."
"Ron, I'm sorry, but Kim isn't really my friend. You might want to talk to someone a bit closer to her. I can offer some emotional support, but I'm probably not the best choice," Felix said with a slightly sad note to his voice. "You could always talk to Monique. She IS Kim's best girl friend."
"I guess I could…"
"That's the spirit! Now then…" Felix looked at his watch, "I have to get going. Hope you can get this stuff figured out, buddy." After their customary fist smacking, Felix left, letting Ron have the remaining nachos for himself.
Ron sat there, contemplating what Felix had said. Most of those ideas had been a lot weirder than what was going on now. And they didn't have to worry about Drakken's plots as long as Drew was around. It really wasn't such a bad thing that they hadn't seen Shego for a while, either. Now if only Bueno Nacho hadn't replaced the bendy straws…
"Yeah. It could definitely be worse. What am I worrying about? KP's my best friend to the end. And Drew should be my friend as well. I mean, he isn't ever that bad of a guy. I should give him a chance," Ron thought aloud. He took a sip of the soda that he had gotten a minute or so after Felix left and sighed. "I've been pretty mean to the guy."
As he was making his plans, he heard the front door of the establishment open. He looked up…and all plans to make a truce with Drew went out the window. For there in the entrance stood Kim and Drew. They were smiling and looking at each other. No surprise there. What was a surprise was that they were holding hands. And standing too close together for it to be merely a friendly thing.
The scream of terror that Ron unleashed would have made even the greatest opera singer proud.
Author's Notes:
This is meant to be a companion piece of sorts for 'A Second Chance'. Since I'm being so darn slow (curse you, dialogue!), I figured I might as well post one of the one-shots meant to supplement the story. They can all be inserted into the main story at the appropriate points. They all add to the story. But this is the only one I'm going to release...for now. Until I finish the next chapter, this will have to suffice; it's several chapters ahead, but it's not like you couldn't guess that this was going to happen...right?
Thanks to Thomas Linquist for taking a look at it. Hope this tides all of you over until I can get the dialogue just right.
