Written by Amy and Sara. Hope you enjoy, and don't forget to R&R! :)
Disclaimer: We do not own Artemis Fowl. But Amy wants to own Butler and Sara wants to own Arty. :3
Julius Root sat at his desk. "Should I ask?" he thought, as he slumped in his black leather chair. The commander's right hand hovered over his cell phone that was laying before him on the table. It would be stupid of him to use the Police Plaza's phone.
"But what if she says no?"
That's what bothered him the most, the fear of rejection. The fear that she'd never be able to look at him again, without laughing.
"All I have to do is say six simple words. All I have to do is say 'Will you go out with me?'"
Even though he was a grown adult, this was one of the things in life that scared him. Asking someone out.
"Eh, even if she does say no, it wouldn't be the first time." The LEP commander mumbled to himself under his breath. "Who cares if she says no?" His conclusion? "I do."
At this point, Julius hated himself. "Stop being a freaking chicken and call her already!" He rolled his brown eyes. "Fine. I will. Now, all I need to do is stop talking to myself." Quickly, before he lost all his nerve, the commander picked up his Fphone. Which was, of course, invented by Foaly.
Then, he dialed Raine Vinyaya. He glanced at the seven digits, hastily scrawled on a napkin by Vinyaya, even though he had long since memorized it.
Root spoke each number carefully, not wanting to mess up, or have the FPhone misinterpret his words. Then placed it firmly onto his ear.
"Hello, this is Spuds..."
The commander quickly hung up. "Crap... Let me try again." He started to say Vinyaya's number again.
"Four"
*Pause*
"Eight"
"Excuse-me-sir-please-repeat." The FPhone's robotic monotone said.
"Four, eight..."
"Excuse-me-the-last-digit-"
"EIGHT!" Root roared.
"Dialing Four-Eight-Eight." The FPhone buzzed for a moment.
A male's voice appeared out of nowhere on the other line.
"This is the Atlantis police hotline, Trouble Kelp speaking. May I help you?"
"Uh..." Root stood there, not knowing what to do, then donned a high-pitch voice.
He squeaked, "Hello, this is...Marjory...Picklebottom, and my, um, fish is stuck in a patch of...seaweed! I live on, uh, Sesame, I mean, Main Street! Hurry, please, kind sir!"
"We will be on our way, ma'am. Thank you." Trouble hangs up, and Root sighs, relieved.
"Four eight three seven seven one nine!" He barks furiously into the FPhone.
"Did-you-just-bark-at-me-sir-" The FPhone asks, sounding almost like Foaly.
"Gwaaa... Foaly really did make this. I hate this."
"YES, YOU STUPID, WORTHLESS PIECE OF JUNK!" Root screamed, his face livid with rage.
"What did you just call me?" A different voice asked. A female's voice. Raine Vinyaya's voice.
"Nothing! Nothing! Just...technical difficulties?"
"It better be. Who are you and want do you want?" Raine asked.
"This is Commander Root."
"Oh!" Vinyaya said, obviously surprised, "Excuse me, sir, you sound different over the phone."
"I do, don't I?" He tried to spark a conversation. Stupid, stupid...Root internally kicked himself.
"Yeah, so what do you want, Julius?" Vinyaya said bluntly, erasing all chances of stalling with small talk.
Commander Root cleared his throat.
"Raine, would you like to go somewhere special?" He asked, his voice almost demanding.
Her voice was cold, "Great. Just what I need, another mission. Where now, Siberia? Or your house, to water your ferns?"
Root swallowed. This might be much, much harder than it had seemed.
"I was thinking, more like Spud's Spud Emporium," he answered gently. Stupid!
"So I can go arrest Spud for trying to mask those shoes as exotic fish? That food there is so bad, I'd rather eat the shoe."
Root tried to hastily cover up his mistake, "My bad, I mean the Acorn Amour."
"Oh, were they smuggling curry again?"
"No... actually...I'd like for..." Root cleared his through and blurted, "Wanna-go-on-a-date-with-me?"
"Hmm...will Foaly be there?"
"Well, no. But if you want him to come, I can ask-"
Vinyaya cut him off, "Perfect."
"Wait, what?"
"I will go on a date with you, Julius." Her tone this time, was not sarcastic or mean, but normal. Serious. Then it hit Julius. Raine Vinyaya was going on a date with him. Raine Vinyaya, the love of his life, was going on a date with him!
Root stood up, and did a little happy dance. In his excitement, he forgot that he was not a particularly good dancer. He knocked over a plasma TV from the wall, as he did a twirl. It fell, and clonked him on the head. Stars swam before his eyes.
"Hello, Julius, you there?" A sound from his FPhone made him glance up, from his spot at the floor. Why was someone talking? Oh yes, Vinyaya...
"I'll pick you up at seven, babe..." Root mumbled groggily. Then, the world went black.
We'll update soon. :3