Complications

I lengthened my strides and made my way to the gardens. What a horrible day, I thought as I walked. First, I forgot my Transfiguration homework in my dorm, then I realized that I didn't even do my DADA homework, and if that wasn't bad enough, I just had to walk in on Potter and Neria *bloody* Migel making out after dinner! Not that I am in love with him anymore, it's just that seeing them neck reminds me of what I don't have. Relationships. And I'm not just talking about a boyfriend. Hell, I'd be grateful for a good acquaintance that would give me their honest opinion about how I wrote up a report. But nooo.

I was labeled as a loner the moment everyone in Hogwarts found out I helped Voldemort *gasp* open the Chamber! What, they think that since I was deceived by a handsome, charming, older guy when I was eleven that I had had all the relationships I needed for my lifetime so they best leave me alone? If that's how they think, who needs them anyway?

Who am I kidding, I need them. That's why I'm here lamenting to myself in my own little secret corner of the Hogwarts gardens... I'm so pathetic. And now here I go, feeling sorry for myself.

Why don't you cry, Ginny, and run to Mum? my brothers always asked when they saw even the faintest gleam of tear in my eyes. Yes, why don't I cry? That certainly makes things so much better.

I sat down on my favorite bench and put my head in my hands. From there, I focused my energy on not crying. I'm one of those emotional people who cries when reading a sad book even though I know that the characters aren't real and it is only a story. The reason why I limit myself to only happy ending books. Then I can still read, my favorite way to spend my hours of free time, without making a scene if I'm in a public place.

Once I got into happy ending stories, I soon started reading romance novels too. They had a happy ending, and I usually liked the characters. Reading romance was a good way of getting away from reality for a while. The cruel reality that doesn't allow me to get close to anyone, even family. The novels let me get away to a place where the men were thoughtful and masculine at the same time. Handsome and sexily arrogant but with a sweet side. The kind of guy I want.

It was then I realized that I heard someone coming up towards me. I raised my head and looked up. Harry. He must have seen me leave and had followed me. How terrible he must feel for having made poor little Ginny-Winny feel bad... He's probably here to console me.

he began, taking a deep breath, I know how you feel about me and -

Oh, and how exactly do I feel about you? I interrupted. I knew it was wrong, but I really wanted to give him a hard time with this. I could always just blame my behavior on PMS later. Have I mentioned that I love being a woman?

He gave me a confused look but persisted. You-you have a crush on me...

And when did you reach that conclusion? I asked. I really shouldn't be enjoying his discomfort this much.

He cleared his throat and said, You've always had a crush on me. Since before your first year...

Get on with it, Harry.

I know you saw me and Neria kissing in that classroom and -

And now you want to apologize for letting my virgin eyes see such situations, correct? I finished for him.

Well, yes. I mean, no of course not. That's not what I mean. I mean, I know that you like me and seeing me with Neria is making you upset so you came here and - Harry babbled before I interrupted him once again.

Oh, I see. Well, you can feel better now, Harry. After seeing you with Neria, I've realized that I don't have a crush on you anymore. In fact, I'm completely over you. So you don't have to comfort me. I feel great. Good-bye now, Harry, I said, dismissing him. He didn't move. I flashed him one of my bright, utterly fake smiles and repeated more firmly, Good bye, Harry.

He nodded his head with a dazed look on his face and turned to walk away. His head was bowed, and he trudged back to the castle. Back to Neria.

I watched him go and then put my head back in my hands, feeling depressed.

Well, just wonderful, Ginny, I think you scared poor Harry. And you told him a lie so now he thinks that you have had a crush on him up until this moment. That was brilliant.

But I didn't want to make him any more confused than he already was by telling him that my little worship of him had ended completely long ago. So I was just trying to save myself from seeing him embarrassed and more apologetic than he was to begin with. It wasn't as bad a move as I first had thought, I guess.

I once again heard the crunch of the gravel as someone once again walking this way.

He just doesn't know when to go away does he. And here I'd thought that he was pretty good at interpreting people's moods.

Harry, I'm fine. You don't need to worry about me, I said in a somewhat pleasant voice. I was a little tired, all right?

Harry? There's no need to be insulting, a male voice said. A Slytherin, I thought instantly. That drawl in his voice gives it away.

I opened my eyes, took a deep breath, and slowly lifted my head.

All right, I was correct. A Slytherin and a tall one at that.

My eyes continued up his frame, and his prefect badge caught my eye for a moment. Finally, I looked up to see Draco Malfoy's face.

All right, that mystery is solved. But why is it that when I'm tired and pissed off people have to be around me? Can't I be pissy in peace?

Can I help you with something? I questioned, but, being the emotional person I am, I wasn't able to keep an edge out of my voice.

he asked shortly after a moment.

I murmured and put my head back into my hands. And so I sat there for a while, trying to persuade myself that going up to my dorm to finish my homework was worth the energy. After a time, I heard him sit down too. Gods, I thought he'd left ages ago.

Well, I guess it isn't my little corner of Hogwarts anymore. Once someone sees the view from the bench, they won't leave. Realistically, I knew that other people have been here. It was just that I'd never seen anyone in all my visits so I pretended that it was my own little world with views of beautiful, exotic flowers with magic properties and the big lake with hidden creatures, both good and bad, in its depths. I can explore without someone holding me back or I can just sit as I am now without interruption.

Too bad that it isn't the case today. Back to the pissy rule again. What's strange is that the one who is here is Draco Malfoy. He seems to thrive in crowds where he can put others down so why is he here in a secluded part of the Hogwarts garden? Then again, everyone needs a little down time I suppose.

He glanced up at me, and I realized I'd been staring right at him throughout that whole train of thought. I knew it was too late. He'd seen me.

I felt my cheeks heat up and then grimaced because one, Malfoy caught me staring at him like a love-sick puppy (though I am not one obviously because I'd know if I was one, I'm fairly observant about my feelings and I'm going to stop babbling to myself now) and two, I'd blushed about this whilst he was looking at me. Damn my Weasley traits.

I could still feel his hard eyes on me and resisted the urge to squirm. I studied the lake because suddenly I found the way the lake moved fascinating. Yeah, that's it. I forced myself to concentrate all my attention on it. That, of course, quickly lost my interest the minute Malfoy's eyes weren't on me. My eyes slowly wondered back towards his direction. I chanced a look at him from the corner of my eye to make sure he wasn't looking at me. And he wasn't. Due to the fact that he was gone!

How did he disappear so suddenly and quietly when I'd felt his presence seconds before and been looking at him only moments before that? I looked all around but didn't see a trance of him. Where was he?

I heard a sound so I froze and listened for more noise. Hearing gravel crunch against other gravel, it seemed Malfoy hadn't left so quietly after all. Almost too late I realized that the sound was coming nearer rather than away from me. Then I heard a voice. A teacher! That was about to catch me out way past curfew. Dammit. Great way to end things for today.