The Gift
By: Amy Barton
The little girl spent a large part of her life in the orphanage. She, along with all of the other little girls, had been beaten. Even though she was like the other little girls she was special, different. She didn't have any scars from her beatings. The day that they saw her playing tug-of-war was a puppy they locked her up. They then killed the puppy. They buried it in the grave that it was peacefully resting in three days earlier. The priest performed an exorcism to force the demon to leave the little girl's body. It had no effect. She was then thrown out on the streets so that no evil would come to the orphanage.
When the dinner bell is rung, everyone working on setting up tents and raising signs stop their work. Everyday we do the same thing. Today is going to be different. Today we are having a revival. I will have my own act instead of just setting up tents for everyone else's.
"Are you ready for your big show Anna?" Thomas questioned.
"I was never told what I am going to end up doing," I replied.
"When I did a revival I just touched the person that wanted to be healed and they became well," Thomas explained.
"So you really can heal?" I questioned.
"It was really just Clarissa, but everyone believed us. You will be fine, just act as if it is not a lie," Thomas advised.
"But what if somebody that really needs help comes up?" I asked.
"Don't worry about that. If someone does John will tell the crowd that you are out of time," Thomas reassured.
As I watched Thomas get in line for lunch, a knot started to form in my stomach. Somehow this felt oddly familiar. It's probably just remembering how John found me fourteen years ago, give or take a few days. I was out living on the streets, I don't remember why, and stumbled into the carnival that was in town. John must have seen a scared little girl that needed a place to stay. I have been a part of the carnival for fourteen years. This revival is to help people get ready for Christmas, which is in a few days.
"Anna! Where are you?" John yelled.
"Over here John," I answered. "Why are you looking for me?"
"You need to get ready for the revival," John answered.
Getting ready for the revival means Clarissa and I need to change and clean up. My dress is a flower print. It is something that I would wear to church. Clarissa is dressed in rags with a scarf over her head so that no one will know that she is actually the fortune teller. Jacob is currently telling everyone about how I laid my hands on him to cure him. Jacob is playing the "saved preacher" very well, everyone seems to believe him.
"And now…Anna, our very own healer!" Jacob said to introduce me.
As I am walking out on the stage everyone in the audience is cheering and clapping for me. As I sit in the chair that was set up for me Clarissa is rolled up for me to "heal." He faked illness is polio; she is unable to walk and cannot even hold her head up. I'm laying my hands on Clarissa to heal her and she begins to violently shake. She suddenly stops shaking and I take my hands off of her. She starts pronouncing that she has been healed and then walks off the stage.
A few hours after the revival John tells me that we made about one-hundred dollars. During the depression this is a very large sum of money. They also tell me that we will have another revival due to the great turnout.
I don't have my own tent, so at night I sleep on the ground under a trailer. Thomas and I talk almost every night to calm down and relax before we try to fall asleep.
"So, Anna, how was your first revival?" Thomas asked.
"It felt fake, just like I was cheating the people out of their beliefs," I responded. "I don't think that I'm gong to be able to lie and cheat at another revival."
"Were you told how much money you raised? We were hurting for money before today, now we can still eat a normal ration," Thomas explained.
"I don't want to cheat people out of their money though. I know that we need to eat but this just isn't right," I stated.
"Just do one more revival, then I will tell John that you don't want to do this anymore. Will that work for you?" Thomas asked.
"Sure, I could do one more revival if I need to. Will you talk to John for me? I don't want him to get upset with me," I replied.
"Yes, I will talk to John for you. We should both get some sleep. Goodnight Anna," Thomas said.
"Thank you Thomas. Goodnight," I replied.
A sickly, old woman is lying in her well-furnished bedroom. Her glassy eyes are forever glaring at the ceiling. She keeps beckoning me to come closer so that she can tell me of my gift and teach me how to use it. I start walking closer to the frail woman. As I walk closer to the old woman she becomes more familiar. With every step I recognize her even more. Suddenly I recognize that she is my grandmother from pictures that I had been given. I begin to run toward her, and then, in an instant, it is over and I am back under the trailer. The dinner bell begins ringing telling us that breakfast is ready. I am eating my breakfast, bacon and eggs with orange juice, when Thomas sits down across from me.
"Anna, how did you sleep last night?" Thomas asked.
"Pretty well," I answered. "I had an odd dream though. Someone who had taken ill wanted to tell me about my gift and to teach me how to use it."
"What kind of gift do you have?" Thomas questioned.
"I am not sure, none that I know about," I replied. "Can we borrow the Chevy later and try to find the old woman's home?"
"John should let us," Thomas responded.
A few hours after the revival and Thomas and I are in the Chevy heading into town. The ride has been extremely silent. I am trying to remember as much as I can about my dream.
"Where did the gas station attendant say that we should turn to find her home?" Thomas asked.
"You should turn right at the next sign," I replied.
"Thank you. What do you think this old woman will tell you?" Thomas questioned.
"I hope that she can tell me what my gift is," I answered. "If I don't know anything about my gift I hope that she can teach me how it works."
The house just came into our view. The house is a two-story craftsman with a large front porch. The paint is a very pale yellow, more like white tinted with a few drops of yellow paint. There is a porch swing swaying in the gentle breeze. A pine green Christmas tree is framed by a large picture window. The flickering candles on the tree light up the burgundy ribbons. As I walk towards the house I begin to feel extremely calm. Somehow I know that the old woman is in the upstairs bedroom. Walking into the bedroom my dream becomes reality. The sickly old woman is in a room furnished with mahogany pieces. She beacons for me to come closer. I obey and sit on the bed next to her.
"Little Anna, have you used your gift yet? Probably not. Your gift has been given to very few humans. To help others you must take the life from something else. Nothing can be given without taking something in return. Since this may be a very high price to pay you must be careful you decide to help using your gift. You are given a decision, but you must use it wisely," the old woman explained. "Now you must leave."
While walking out to the Chevy my mind is trying to decipher what I was just told. I shut the Chevy's passenger door and Thomas asks "What did she say? Did talking to her help you any?"
"She told me that to help someone I need to take the life from something else. She did help me, but I still don't know what my gift is supposed to do to help others," I replied.
The entire ride back is in silence. We get back to the carnival and John comes and tells me that we are doing another revival. It will begin at ten in the morning. Like before, I will be the healer running the revival. Since the revival is in the morning I am trying to get a goodnights sleep so that I will be well rested.
"Goodnight Anna," Clarissa says.
"Goodnight," I respond from under the trailer.
Someone that is very ill walks up to me. It is a young woman who appears to be very near to death. She is walking with a serious limp. Her skin is a sickly yellow. Her eyes are sunken deep into her face. She starts moaning that she needs me to help her. I lay my hands on her so that I can help and in an instant everything vanishes.
As I open my eyes I am slowly blinded by the sun's cheery morning rays. My dream from the night before stays in my mind as I get into the breakfast line. Thomas sits down while I am trying to decipher my most recent dream.
"What are you daydreaming about Anna?" Thomas asked.
"I had another dream last night," I answered. "A young, but very ill, almost near death, woman was walking up to me during the revival. She looked very ill, her skin was a sickly yellow and her eyes were sunk deep into her face. She wanted me to help her and I tried to but then I woke up. I don't know what will happen in the end."
"It was probably just a dream," Thomas reassured me. "You shouldn't need to worry about anything."
"Thomas, pray that you are right. I don't think that I could handle that happening," I explain.
"I assure you that nothing like that will happen," Thomas said. "You should get ready for the revival."
I am now ready for the revival, dressed in my Sunday best. Jacob starts with the usual introduction. He proclaims that I laid my hands on him and cured him of his illness. He then calls me onto the stage. Clarissa then comes on the stage so that I can "heal" her.
After I heal Clarissa, a young woman limps up to the stage. Her skin is a sickly yellow and her eyes are sunken deep into her face. John must have not seen her walk up to the stage. He did not say that we were out of time or that I was too worn out to continue. I am forced to try and "heal" the young woman.
The young woman tells me that her liver quit functioning properly. She only has at most two weeks left in her life. She wants me to; at least, prolong her life so that she can experience more friendship during her life. I decide to at least try to heal her. If I can't, or when I can't, I will just say that there are some illnesses that I can't heal. I lay my hands on the young woman just as John begins to understand what is happening. John shakes his head which tells me to stop, but I can't stop now. As I keep my hands on the young woman I start to concentrate on healing her. The plants around me shrivel and die as the woman slowly begins to look healthy again. Her skin color changes while her eyes don't appear to be sunk into her face. She thanks me and says that she owes me her life. She then leaves, without limping, completely cured of her liver problems. Everyone, including myself, appear to be astonished that the young woman was healed.
Later in the day we are all eating supper. After the experience with the young woman I am truly a carnie, not just someone who sets up tents and signs. The other carnies are now showing me respect. Here, respect is the greatest object that can be given or received. If you are not given respect, or even show respect, you are looked down upon by everyone.
Now that I have gained respect, I have also gained a tent to call home. A few days after I healed the young woman my tent is set up and I am able to use it. Of course, due to the drought, it rains for the first time in months. The ground is wet, and inch of still standing water in spots, and it continues to rain. Thomas, who still does not have a tent, sleeps in the rain under the trailer. I am woken up in the morning due to Clarissa shaking me very roughly. John comes in and begins talking to me in a panicked manor.
"Thomas slept outside in the rain last night, not in the Chevy like I told him to!" John exclaims in a frantic fashion. "Thomas isn't responding and his breathing is irregular."
I run outside towards the trailer to help my closest friend. Thomas is even more ill than John and Clarissa led me to believe. He is within minutes of death. I don't reach him in time; he is dead seconds before I arrive at his side. Then I remember the teaching of the elderly woman, I may give a life by taking a life. This means that I can return Thomas' life to him if I rob someone else of their own. I believe in my heart that Thomas' life is worth it, but who will I, or could I, eliminate…
Some people would still think of me as evil, just as everyone at the orphanage did. I am still a creature of God, but I am given more free will than the average person. This free will also adds more responsibility; I decide who will live and who will die. If the decision is too complicated for me to make on my own, Thomas will add his opinion. As I said earlier, his life is very important to me. The only problem now is that the carnival is short one act…
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