Yo! articmadador here! Yes, I have returned after missing in action for what feels like forever! I've decided to start writing stories again, possibly start a new series. I don't know if I'll finish Our World, Their War, I'll just have to see. Anyway, this is a series about Rhythm and Illusion eating things they shouldn't be. It's just something to get me back writing. I DO NOT OWN TRANSFORMERS! Hasbro does. I only own whatever characters and plot materials you don't recognize. Please review and enjoy.

Illusion sat on top of the main hanger at base, staring at the same thing she'd been staring at for days. It was so beautiful to her. It shined perfectly in the sun, its metal clear of all dirt and perfectly waxed. No matter what time of day it was, even if the sun wasn't directly shining on it, it shined like new money. When the wind blew up tiny dust devils that showered everything in sand, it remained untouched. Soldiers would walk pass it and occasionally stop the marvel at its beauty as well. It was so gorgeous, so rare, so clean, so pure.

It was NEST's new combat helicopter, and Illusion loved it. She loved it so much that she wanted to eat it.

She had longed to devour that helicopter the moment it had been brought to base. Even when Lennox warned both her and Rhythm to stay away from it, she longed for it. Even when Mirage had told her she'd better stay away from it or be sorry, she craved it. Even when Optimus caught her licking it and gave her a lecture on why she can't eat it and must stay away, she knew she needed it. And when Ratchet had slammed her with the wrench for saying she was going to eat it no matter what, she knew she would get it.

It was the most beautiful piece of machinery she'd ever seen. It was the largest helicopter on base, bigger than the ones that could lift Optimus off the ground in his bipedal mode. It was heavily armored, high tech, and looked like something straight out of the future. It had cost a lot of money to manufacture, and NEST had to come off of a large sum of money to obtain it. If something were to happen to it outside of combat, there would be some serious consequences. Especially if a certain Predabot were to be the cause of the damages.

But Illusion would not be discouraged. She wanted that helicopter and she wanted it damn bad. For days she plotted, watched, and waited. She only left to train, refuel, and go to meetings. She recharged on the roof every night, her always optics on the helicopter when she finally slipped into recharge. She ignored the other bots when they wanted a ride or wanted to play. She only answered to Mirage when he wanted something. Nothing else but him and that helicopter mattered.

Everyone noticed she was becoming obsessed with it, and after a while it was decided that Illusion was no longer allowed to be near the helicopter. She was ordered to stay at Mirage's side at all times when walking around base. When she was outside, soldiers were ordered to watch the helicopter with careful eyes. The patrols were doubled, and there was no way Illusion could get close without multiple soldiers seeing her. If she even tried to get pass them, and she did a few times, she had a trip to the brig and multiple lectures. Not to mention Mirage would get upset at her for misbehaving and make her feel guilty. Eventually whenever she walked into the main hanger, she could hear radios come to life with warnings of her arrival. She hated being treated like that, and she knew she'd never get close to her prize if this went on much longer.

As agonizing as it was, Illusion was forced to stay away from her precious helicopter. She decided that she'd try to put it out of her mind. She was always forgetting things on accident, so she figured she could intentionally do the same. So, she did everything she could to forget. She avoided the main hanger and any areas near the helicopter. She wrestled with both pairs of twins, trained and played with Mirage, annoyed Ratchet, played with Rhythm, and did anything else she could think of. When that failed, she helped the twins with pranks, bothered Ironhide into giving her a training session, and used her cloaking software to scare soldiers. Eventually she simply bothered others as much as she could to distract herself. For days she could not forget no matter how hard she tried, and her thoughts were stuck on that helicopter. However, as time went on, she slowly seemed to forget about it. She found herself causing less trouble, like she had before for the simple fun of it as opposed to in hopes that she would forget. She stopped bothering everyone so much and became more relaxed. For a while, things went back to normal. Illusion acted like her old self and seemingly forgot about the helicopter.

Inside, however, she was dying to get at it. She was practically screaming in her processor because she couldn't get to it. She pretended that she didn't care about it, and ignored the soldiers guarding it. Maybe, she thought, if she pretended that she'd forgotten about it long enough, then they'd ease up on the guards and patrols. Illusion was a patient bot at times, and this time her patience paid off. As the days passed, Lennox had less and less solders guarding and patrolling. As more time passed, Illusion saw her dream of eating that helicopter getting a little closer. She knew she had to be careful, and take as few risks as possible. She needed to wait for the perfect moment to get it and take it off into the desert so she could devour it.

She got her chance a few days later. There were many skirmishes going on with rogue Predacons and Decepticons across the world. Soldiers and bots had been dispatched, but Illusion was lucky enough that she and Mirage had not been called off. She watched as they slowly left, and observed how the base became more empty woth each new mission. Now there were less soldiers on patrols, and less bots around with advanced hearing. She could get away with stealing the helicopter now. She waited until nightfall to make her move, that way fewer humans would be up and about to hear her make her move.

That night she recharged with Mirage. He had been suspicious of her, though he had said nothing. She knew him well enough to know when he was catching on to her plots. She stayed with him and recharged for a little bit, and when she was good and sure he was in deep recharge, she got up to sneak out. She knew there was a great chance that he would wake up, so she moved quickly and quietly. Unfortunately, she wasn't quiet enough to get by the spy bot.

"Mmm…Illusion?" he murmured sleepily.

She froze in fear, and her optics turned neon orange. "Yeah?" she asked, trying to sound sleepy.

"Where are you going?"

"I uh…gotta void?" Illusion could've applauded herself for the quick thinking.

Mirage made a noise between a snort and a quiet chuckle, then rolled over. "Don't disturb anyone."

"Okay."

And just like that, Mirage had fallen into a light recharge once again, and Illusion was free to go. Never before had something so big moved so fast. With few bots and humans up at the latest hours of the night, she was able to get around more freely. She activated her cloaking, forcing it to match the black darkness and gray shadows around her. The good thing about the Autobots having their own hanger was that they didn't have to have the lights on constantly. They are usually dimmed later in the day, then turned off at night. The lights were only left on because sometimes humans did come into the hanger, and they needed them. Luckily, they were never around at night, so she didn't have to sneak pass them. With so many bots gone, she was able to sneak right out.

Illusion reset her cloaking to match the sky as she took off towards the main hanger. She flew as quietly as she could, and did her best to glide over and avoid flapping. Looking down below her, she saw no soldiers around in the area. This was pure luck, and for once she was glad there was so much going on around the world so no one was around. She needed this, and she needed it now! As she approached the main hanger, she slowed down her flight and landed as gently as she possibly could, considering her size. After resetting her cloaking to better match her surroundings, she looked down at the beautiful helicopter. It shines in the moonlight, looking more pristine and perfect than it ever had before. Tonight, she would finally get her treat. She would finally devour this beautiful machine. She would carry it off somewhere into the nearby mountains and eat every part of it before anyone even knew.

She spread her wings, ran over how she would carry it in her processor a few times, then went for it. She flew above it, then carefully landed on top of it. Working quickly, she maneuvered her arms and legs around the blades and wrapped them around the helicopter. Using all of her strength, she lifted the heavy machine into the air. Her wing flaps were too loud, and she had not reset her cloaking, but she could not focus on that now. She needed to made sure she didn't drop the helicopter. She tightened her grip, then turned and flew away from base and into the surrounding mountainous desert.

"The helicopter is gone, and she's the only one who could've taken it! Mirage, why weren't you watching her!?"

"I was recharging. She must have sneaked out."

"Aren't you Special Ops!? Doesn't the slightest movement wake you up!?"

"Well, yes but…"

"Then why didn't you stop her!?"

"She…she said she had to void."

Lennox blinked at her. "You let her go because she had to piss?"

Mirage seemed flinch at the last word. "Yes, it seemed reasonable. Besides, it was so late and my processor was still cloudy from recharge."

Lennox signed. "NEST's brand new, expensive helicopter that took a big chunk out of NEST funds and paychecks is missing and Illusion is missing! We need to find her!"

"Captain Lennox, I've been calling her all morning. I've been out searching, and many soldiers have as well. There are still patrols out, and—"

At that moment a jeep full of soldiers rolled up. "We found her!" the soldiers yelled.

Illusion came trotting up, her head low and her belly area noticeably bulging. She trotted up to Mirage, licked his servo, then plopped down at his pedes. She rolled on her back and looked up at him, her optics glowing bright green. Mirage scowled at her.

"Illusion, you ate the helicopter, didn't you?"

"Ah sure did. Ah stole that sumbitch last night, took it into tha desert, and ate the whole thing."

Lennox through his hands up in the air. "Son of a…"

Mirage looked worried. "You ate the entire thing?"

"Yep". Illusion did the robot equivalent of a hiccup. "Every…part…"

Mirage vents. "You need Ratchet, don't you?"

Illusion goes to nod, but instead hiccups hard and a metal bar falls out of her mouth. "Yes please…get Ratchet…I'm gonna purge! I…I regret nothing!"

Mirage only steps away and comms Ratchet, informing him of the situation. Meanwhile the soldiers all run away as Illusion purges leather, fuel, and acid on the ground. "Yep," she hacks, "That was worth it!"

It feels good to finally post something. Hope you enjoyed. Have a good'n!