Connections – Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Matt's POV

As I lay in my bed tonight, I know I won't be able to sleep. I think about the conversations we had earlier, and I wonder if they meant as much to him as they did to me.

How can he look so perfect without trying? When I spend time doing my hair, choosing my clothes, he seems to just flow with a careless grace I can't mimic.

I still can't believe that I am the way I am. I feel awkward around my friends, them knowing that I'm different. They don't treat me the same anymore...except Andres. He still sees me as the same person even though I see him as more.

I feel so wrong now. My whole life I've been told that being gay is sin, and now I am sick. Those closest to me don't even know me anymore.

I didn't mean for it to happen, honestly. I was picking up the shattered glass and one shard jabbed it's way into my hand. I didn't pull it out, I just stared at it. That's what scares me.

•••••••

The next Monday, my mom told me I had to go to the Band Booster meeting. However, I stayed outisde, and I observed my peers. Nick was there as always, and so were Sam and Aubree. There was a sickening feeling in my stomach when I realized Andres was standing sulkily in the corner. My feelings have been building inside me for a couple weeks now, and I believe I want to kiss him.

Andres's POV

I've been feeling strange the past few weeks. I haven't told anyone, not even Sam. After Franny left me, I felt like I lost my connection to girls. I never really had close guy friends, unless you count Braden or Matt. While Braden and I seperated, Matt and I have seemed to have gotten closer.

But now he was here, at the Band Booster meeting. Oh, God, he had timing, didn't he? I sigh. I think I need to talk to him. Yea, that's what I'll do. Maybe if I talk to him, these strange feelings will go away. He's over there.
"Hey, Matt, dude, can I talk to you privately?"
"Uhh, sure."
I led him over to the conex.

"Hey, I..."
I was silenced by the sensation of his lips upon mine. They were dry and chapped, but warm, eager. He pulled away before I could react. We looked at each other, stunned.
"Was it...bad?" He asked uncertainly.
"No, Matt, it wasn't."
We awkwardkly smiled at each other and stared into each others eyes for a good 10 minutes, maybe longer. I wanted to stay here forever, but sadly the booster meeting ended. That's when I came to the realization of my feelings for Matt.