Killings: Mushroom Style
By: Scratch
Author's Note: This story's idea belongs to Porkey Chops, and I thought he
deserved recognition for it. Thank him for the awesome idea, and I hope you
all enjoy the fic! -Scratch ^..^
One day, Bowser was having a good time as usual at the comic book
store flipping through back issues of X-Men. He was enjoying an especially
good X-Men when he saw, standing near him... TOAD!!! Bowser groaned. He was
sick of the little mushroom-head, and it was so hard to be polite to the guy.
He decided to just ignore him and go back to reading X-Men when someone came
into the store. It was... oh no! Peach! She sauntered into the shop with her
ugly pink dress and crown. She narrowed her eyes and looked about the shelves
of comics for a minute. Then she walked, somewhat defiantly, up to the
counter.
"Don't you have anything suitible for MY reading purposes here?" she
asked the guy behind the counter.
"Well... uh... What did you have in mind?" he asked.
"Something besides these... immature comic books," she said.
"Well, this IS a comic book store. If you want a better selection go
to a real book store or the library," said the guy.
"Don't you know I'm too lazy for that?! I'm a princess. I want
everything handed to me on a silver platter!" she snapped.
Bowser saw Toad look up from his Batman comic and sigh.
"That princess...," muttered Toad.
This suprised Bowser. Toad? Mad at the princess? Impossible! Why,
the little guy worked for her!
"What about her, Toad?" Bowser asked.
"Huh?" Toad said, confused. "Oh, it's you. Well, as hard as it may
be to believe, Peach really pisses me off sometimes."
"Really? Wow," Bowser said. "Ha, I guess now you know why I'm always
capturing her for my own evil little purposes."
"You know? I envy you. Sometimes I wish I could be evil, too. I get
sick of being a goody two-shoes all the time. Especially to protect someone I
don't even like that much!" Toad said.
"Now this is a side I've never seen of you before. Well, I've
got a plan..." said Bowser and motioned for Toad to come over to him. He
whispered Toad his plan. Toad grinned evilly and said, "Let's do it!"
Bowser lumbered over to the counter and to the employee's surprise,
lifted Peach off her feet.
"HEY!!! What are you doing?! I'm not finished whining yet!" Peach
screeched.
"Uh...," Bowser said to the employee, "I'm sorry about this, but I
have to take my... *gulp* ...girlfriend home." Bowser shuddered at the idea
of having Peach as his girlfriend.
"Uh, sure, fine," the employee stammered, glad to be rid of the
princess.
"Yeah, well... Come on, Toad!" Bowser said in the calmest voice he
could manage.
"Coming!" said Toad, and the threesome hurried out of the shop.
* * * * * *
Toad, Bowser, and Peach arrived at Bowser's evil den-lair.
"I'll show you to your... room!" yelled Bows', and he threw Peach
into a small wooden cage and locked the door.
Meanwhile, Peach was hollering her lungs out.
"You guys better let me out! I am the princess! HOW COULD YOU DO
THIS TO ME!!??? TOAD!!!! WHY??!!"
"Well, Peach, I have protected you and been your servent for so
long, putting up with your prissiness. And I got nothing for it! So, if you
can clean up your attitude, we can put this nonsense behind us," Toad said
calmly, and smiled infuriatingly.
"PRISSY???!!!! I AM NOT PRISSY. AND YOUR THE ONE THAT'S
NONSENSE!!!!" Peach screamed, and began to throw the trash, debris, and who-
knows-what-else that was on her cage's bottom at Toad.
Toad said, "Well, you asked for it," and pointed at Bowser, who was
standing in the dark corner grinning his sharp, shiny teeth with glee. His
reptillian eyes glinted menacingly.
He stomped over and in a few earth-rattling strides he had reached
Peach's cage. She stared up at him, open-mouthed, until she realized she was
showing her fear. Her pride kicked in and she crossed her arms and closed her
eyes in defiance.
Bowser lifted her cage with his clawed hands, and then smashed it
quickly to the ground. Peach's blood-curdling cry was heard for the last
time.
Toad cheered, and Bowser roared in delight. They gave eachother
high-fives and then Toad said, "Why don't you come back to my place and we
can grab something to eat? I'm starved."
"Yes, that's a great idea. That experience did leave me a bit
famished," Bowser said, and flashed his teeth again.
So the two heroes of the Mario-Universe left Bowser's den, and this
time, in satisfaction!
THE END
By: Scratch
Author's Note: This story's idea belongs to Porkey Chops, and I thought he
deserved recognition for it. Thank him for the awesome idea, and I hope you
all enjoy the fic! -Scratch ^..^
One day, Bowser was having a good time as usual at the comic book
store flipping through back issues of X-Men. He was enjoying an especially
good X-Men when he saw, standing near him... TOAD!!! Bowser groaned. He was
sick of the little mushroom-head, and it was so hard to be polite to the guy.
He decided to just ignore him and go back to reading X-Men when someone came
into the store. It was... oh no! Peach! She sauntered into the shop with her
ugly pink dress and crown. She narrowed her eyes and looked about the shelves
of comics for a minute. Then she walked, somewhat defiantly, up to the
counter.
"Don't you have anything suitible for MY reading purposes here?" she
asked the guy behind the counter.
"Well... uh... What did you have in mind?" he asked.
"Something besides these... immature comic books," she said.
"Well, this IS a comic book store. If you want a better selection go
to a real book store or the library," said the guy.
"Don't you know I'm too lazy for that?! I'm a princess. I want
everything handed to me on a silver platter!" she snapped.
Bowser saw Toad look up from his Batman comic and sigh.
"That princess...," muttered Toad.
This suprised Bowser. Toad? Mad at the princess? Impossible! Why,
the little guy worked for her!
"What about her, Toad?" Bowser asked.
"Huh?" Toad said, confused. "Oh, it's you. Well, as hard as it may
be to believe, Peach really pisses me off sometimes."
"Really? Wow," Bowser said. "Ha, I guess now you know why I'm always
capturing her for my own evil little purposes."
"You know? I envy you. Sometimes I wish I could be evil, too. I get
sick of being a goody two-shoes all the time. Especially to protect someone I
don't even like that much!" Toad said.
"Now this is a side I've never seen of you before. Well, I've
got a plan..." said Bowser and motioned for Toad to come over to him. He
whispered Toad his plan. Toad grinned evilly and said, "Let's do it!"
Bowser lumbered over to the counter and to the employee's surprise,
lifted Peach off her feet.
"HEY!!! What are you doing?! I'm not finished whining yet!" Peach
screeched.
"Uh...," Bowser said to the employee, "I'm sorry about this, but I
have to take my... *gulp* ...girlfriend home." Bowser shuddered at the idea
of having Peach as his girlfriend.
"Uh, sure, fine," the employee stammered, glad to be rid of the
princess.
"Yeah, well... Come on, Toad!" Bowser said in the calmest voice he
could manage.
"Coming!" said Toad, and the threesome hurried out of the shop.
* * * * * *
Toad, Bowser, and Peach arrived at Bowser's evil den-lair.
"I'll show you to your... room!" yelled Bows', and he threw Peach
into a small wooden cage and locked the door.
Meanwhile, Peach was hollering her lungs out.
"You guys better let me out! I am the princess! HOW COULD YOU DO
THIS TO ME!!??? TOAD!!!! WHY??!!"
"Well, Peach, I have protected you and been your servent for so
long, putting up with your prissiness. And I got nothing for it! So, if you
can clean up your attitude, we can put this nonsense behind us," Toad said
calmly, and smiled infuriatingly.
"PRISSY???!!!! I AM NOT PRISSY. AND YOUR THE ONE THAT'S
NONSENSE!!!!" Peach screamed, and began to throw the trash, debris, and who-
knows-what-else that was on her cage's bottom at Toad.
Toad said, "Well, you asked for it," and pointed at Bowser, who was
standing in the dark corner grinning his sharp, shiny teeth with glee. His
reptillian eyes glinted menacingly.
He stomped over and in a few earth-rattling strides he had reached
Peach's cage. She stared up at him, open-mouthed, until she realized she was
showing her fear. Her pride kicked in and she crossed her arms and closed her
eyes in defiance.
Bowser lifted her cage with his clawed hands, and then smashed it
quickly to the ground. Peach's blood-curdling cry was heard for the last
time.
Toad cheered, and Bowser roared in delight. They gave eachother
high-fives and then Toad said, "Why don't you come back to my place and we
can grab something to eat? I'm starved."
"Yes, that's a great idea. That experience did leave me a bit
famished," Bowser said, and flashed his teeth again.
So the two heroes of the Mario-Universe left Bowser's den, and this
time, in satisfaction!
THE END