Our love was forbidden. We were never meant to be together from the start and yet I find myself constantly biting into the apple of temptation. My beloved brother, whom I constantly fantasize over, is the man who shares this apple with me. We share the burden on our shoulders, carrying it together as we try to hide the burning passion between us. The fiery stares in the meeting room, the sinful kisses that burn holes into my body, constantly having me wonder if they can see through me. We hide in the shadows as we rendezvous in the devil's den. Not only are we both men, but brothers and we deserve to burn in the lowest pits of hell. But if I'm with you, will it still be a punishment?
It started young, our love blossoming out of season like a sunflower in winter. The moment I saw your azure eyes, the warmest of smiles on your face and the soft touch of your hand, I discovered the unholy tree. Nightmares and phobias, lies to get you to hold me the way I wanted to be held. Your arms were strong and inviting, a new home for a lost rabbit. I'd watch as Arthur favorited you with jealousy. He got more attention from you then I did. I'd cry in my bed, only for you to come and save me from the green beast. My hero; your cape flows behind you gallantly and wraps me in your love.
It wasn't until I had matured to twelve, that I delved into the fruit, taking my first bite. Arthur was drunk, bringing home prostitutes and strange women. He'd be drunk and would yell at us, throwing bottles and forcing us out. I'd cry and you'd hold me. "I don't l-like it w-when he's d-drunk, A-Alfie!"
"Me neither, but I know how to make you happy." I looked over, sadness running down my face at marathon speed, halting to hear what he had to say. "H-How?"
"Those ladies, they liked it when Artie touched their lips."
"You mean, k-kiss?"
"That's what it is?"
"Yeah, b-but pa-pa F-France said you only k-kiss the one's you l-love."
"Well, I love you." The demon had crimsoned his cheeks, flushing his face in his image. We all have demons.
"Y-you do?"
"Yeah." Before able to do anything else, his lips were on mine, biting into the fruit. Who knew it tasted this good? I needed more, my body ached and yearned. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I pulled him in deeper. The feel of his hands on my flesh was electrifying. He nibbled on my bottom lip, butterflies surging throughout my body, making me feel light-headed and high. High on Alfred.
We pulled apart, connected by a silver strand. Our eyes hazed over in lust and want. It wasn't long until will bit again; a heated, passionate kiss so hot, our bodies melted together, forming a new entity. A snake slithered and encased our bodies together. We were Lucifer's new victims; an alternative Adam and Eve.
Night after night, we'd sneak into each other's rooms. We never got farther then a heated kiss. Isn't that far enough? Our tongues would waltz together, moving in step and mesmerizing the dance floor. We allowed our hands to wander, feeling the silk, alabaster skin that warmed our fingertips with just a brush of contact. Never were we caught, never could we be caught. Thieves of the night, we stole kisses from each other and eventually, our hearts.
I lay my head in the clouds of pillows, weeping a river of tears, enough to fill Niagara Falls. You had declared Independence from Artie, and me? The crows encircled the moon, demons of the night, beckoning for their next meal. I held the pillow next to mine, it reeked of your scent, and as unholy as it was, I inhaled a bit more of the fruit.
It's raining outside, thundering. I could walk out and cry right now, raindrop masks to hide my feelings as I cry to the hateful God above. Is this my punishment for being unclean? A sense of warm arms engulfed my body making me melting into the touch. Your scent snaked around my body as a wave of ecstasy flowed through my veins. I needed another bite.
That night we went farther than before. There was no turning back now. Arthur could have walked in at any point, stumbling upon our devilish dance of the night; but he was too drunk to even crawl. He had been drunk often after you left. Like an angel in the night, you swept into my room to save me from misery. Biting into my neck, you licked up my tainted essence, filling your own soul with more corruption. We didn't care and we never looked back. The taste of your flesh was deliciously sweet, my own sweet devil. You're eyes held the key to your feelings and all I could see was passion. The moan you elicit drove you farther, and I followed anywhere you went. I was yours to do with as you pleased, I was at your mercy.
I gained independence, but he didn't care. We still continued to eat under the Sin Tree. Each bite better than the last. But when will you start to get bored? My feelings managed to escape after one night, leading to an argument not meant for lovers. We couldn't be this way. Every time after, more and more yelling. God really hated me. You left and for a while, I thought you'd never come back.
Sitting at the meetings, you'd flirt with Arthur and Kiku. My heart burned and disintegrated right in my chest. To get back, Francis and Ivan were my victims. Falling into my Siren trap, they fell ill to my charming voice and sweet air. "Matthieu, you are as sweet as Maple." I was as sour as an apple. Leaving the meeting room, I died and went to hell. Your arms wrapped around the Brit, allowing him to taste the fruit, I ran out that moment, leaving my past behind. Written in the history of my life, my past is my present and future; I can't escape nor delete it.
Laying on my bed, the ceiling never looked so empty before. The rope dangled above my head taunting me. "You want this don't you? You were never good enough for him. He used you, why not end it?" I'm too strong to end it, or simply, too weak. A shadow passed through my sight. Terrified, I froze in place until the warm feeling engulfed me, dropping the tentative fruit into my hands once more. "It's not the same, unless it's with you."
A tryst with such burning sensation was never shared between us before that night. Rough and loving at the same time, a wild night as we sat under that tree. Such sinful words spoken between us, uttered lies between two lovers of prosperity and acceptance. We would never be accepted, for we are brothers of evil. The same blood flows through our veins therefore we share a similar destiny. Eternity in the seven circles, dancing and doting; managing to somehow survive Satan's sick games.
The crows watched over us from then on, lists of misdeeds written on their scrolls. The common 'ca-caw' heard throughout the eves of our intimacy. We know they watch and we continue with our escapades, finding new pleasures on each other's bodies, tasting more of the delicate harvest from the snake's tree.
As years went on, our flame never died down, instead it burned brighter through the midnight. Our 'lovers' knew not of our secret doings, but of our 'hatred' for each other. Sibling rivalry was the excuse, fear of eschew was the reason. Our 'lovers' hated each other as much as they hated each other's 'lovers'. What would they do if they discovered the tree we had worked so hard to keep hidden. My love, I'm scared.
They've discovered our secret, all are appalled. What do we do? How do we handle this? My love, one final session before we solve this complication. The last bite of fruit before the tree withers. A storm is brewing and the tree blows into dust. Our screams and tears mixed with the essence of our unholy dance. Step by step we near the end of the song. Does it have to be this way?
Yes.
And so the core thudded to the grass, all witnesses to our lovers suicide. Encore! Encore! Another show between the forbidden, one more dance! There can be no more dancing. And so with a sip of the Grand Finale, we bid you Adieu.