The funny thing is I was midway through writing this before I got tagged to write A Life Shared. So... kind of similar premise here. Oops. It was originally just going to be friendshippy but then my shipping feels got in the way. Oh well, there's hardly enough fic for this pairing as it is.
Waiting
"…stellise?! Are you all right?!"
Oh… why did her head hurt so much?
"Lady Estellise? Please, answer me!"
She lay on the ground, which was… metal? Where was she? Her skull pounded and her muscles ached. Estelle pushed herself up, muscles straining, and clutched the sides of her head. The world wobbled and dizziness almost knocked her down again, but she managed to stay upright and looked around, trying to figure out why she saw sheets of metal and heavy girders. It was too dark to see clearly, but orangey light illuminated the small room. She tasted salt on her lips and could hear the trickle of water nearby.
"Where… where am I?"
Someone sighed in relief. "You're alive."
"Flynn?" The voice had come from behind a pile of twisted metal, but she couldn't bring herself to get up and go to him just yet.
"Yeah. Are you hurt?"
She pulled her hand away from her head and saw blood. "I… I think I hit my head. Where are we, Flynn? What's going on?"
There was a long pause. "…You don't remember?"
She started to shake her head, but stopped because it hurt. A few seconds later, she remembered that Flynn couldn't see her. Her thoughts came so sluggishly and her head still pounded. "I hit my head really bad." She didn't know where she was, but it was obvious this wasn't a good situation. Her head hurt so badly, and from all the twisted metal it was clear there had been a collapse of some kind. The floor slanted away from the pile of metal she sat near. About ten feet down, a smaller hallway branched off. Heat and orange light radiated from this hall, but it was steady and silent and didn't seem to come from a live fire.
"We're on the Heracles," Flynn said.
As the fuzziness in her head gradually cleared, she noticed a strain to Flynn's voice and wondered why he still hadn't come around from the pile of metal to see her. The Heracles, though… that sounded familiar. Hazy memories came back of going to Flynn in concern because the old hunk of metal still sat on the coast and leaked oil into the ocean. "You and I… came here to check out the oil."
"Yes, that's right." He seemed relieved that she still had that much memory left.
"And then something went wrong." She didn't remember what, but the fact that they were in a dark tunnel surrounded by broken metal was a good clue.
"I'm not entirely sure what happened." He paused to take a few quick breaths. "We were trying to seal the valve that was leaking…."
His voice trailed off into a pant and she shuddered with worry. "Flynn? Are you all right?"
"Don't worry about me. As I was saying, we must have touched the wrong valve. Something blew up. The floor collapsed and we fell." After speaking such a long string of words, he had to pause and catch his breath.
Hesitantly, fearing the answer, she asked, "Flynn, how bad are you hurt?"
Flynn was silent for a long moment, and then he admitted, "…Pretty bad."
If Flynn was actually admitting he was badly hurt, it must be serious. She had to get to his side and heal him, quick. She was too dizzy to hope of walking, so she crawled across the cold floor. Her skull still pounded and all her joints ached, but she needed to make sure Flynn was all right. As she crawled around the pile of what must be collapsed floor, Flynn's head came into view, perpendicular to the direction of the hallway. When she completely rounded the pile, she was able to make out exactly what Flynn's situation was and her chest turned to ice.
If she looked to her left, she saw the orange light shimmering on the rippling surface of seawater, because the Heracles had been on the coast and the blast must have knocked their hallway below water level. The hall wasn't supposed to be slanted, but it was now. One end was submerged, while she hoped that a way out could be found on the other side of the pile of metal. The main thing sealing off the exit was a sheet of broken metal.
It didn't look too heavy, and with a bit of exertion she'd probably be able to push it aside, but it was propped up by a thin metal support that had bent back and swung to the floor like the stand of a picture frame. At one end, it was bolted to the sheet of metal with heavy screws. And at the other end…
"Oh, Flynn!" She rushed to his side, having to duck even though she was already on her knees. "Don't worry, I'm going to get you out of here."
The metal beam had smashed into the floor, and didn't seem to mind that Flynn's abdomen had gotten in the way. About one inch of steel sunk into the left side of Flynn's abdomen, and she had little doubt it kept going to the floor.
"I'm… fine for now."
His face was tight with pain, but he had a point. For now, the bar was doing a good job of plugging the wound. Only minimal amounts of blood seeped up from the edges, but even with her pounding headache and lingering fuzziness, Estelle knew that the moment she pulled it out, she was going to have to work fast to heal a massive haemorrhage.
"Are you all right, Lady Estellise?"
"Me? Flynn, you're in no state to worry about me!"
"You didn't even remember where we are," he pointed out and then caught his breath and frowned. "Your head is bleeding."
She put her hand to the side of his head. "I'm fine, Flynn, really." She most likely had a concussion and there were several superficial cuts and bruises covering her body, but nothing life threatening.
"You know what day it is?"
Estelle opened her mouth to answer, and then wrinkled her brow. "Uh… I…"
Flynn's frowned deepened. "Your name?"
"Estelle."
He closed his eyes. "Ok. You're probably not too bad."
"Flynn! How can you even think of worrying about me at a time like this?" She struggled to keep her cool, but her head throbbed and her hands shook. Flynn was really hurt. "It's going to be ok," she said, more for her own benefit. "I'll pull this out and heal you fast, and then we'll just walk out."
She grabbed the pole, causing it to shift the tiniest bit.
Flynn gasped and blood oozed around the edges of the pole. "No!" Flynn cried, his voice rougher than she'd ever heard from him before.
"I'm sorry!"
Flynn took short, shallow breaths and his face managed to pale even more than it already was. "Don't… don't move that."
"I have to take it out, Flynn. I'm sorry. We need to move it to get out of here."
He just groaned, his eyes still squeezed shut.
Estelle gentle reached out and held his hand. "I'll do it fast. I'll yank it out and then cast First Aid before you even realize it's out."
Flynn moaned at the thought and then nodded slightly. "You're right. Heal yourself first, though."
Flynn had a point. This operation was going to need precision and speed, which would be easier to accomplish without blood dripping down the side of her head and bruises covering her body. "Right. Ok. Give me one moment, please." She took a few deep breaths to try to calm down, and then summoned the magic.
But the magic didn't come. She tried again, but where she normally felt warm bubbles of energy rising in preparation for a spell, all she got was a stab of pain from her headache. She squeezed her eyes shut and tried again, but try as she might, she couldn't get the magic to work. All that happened was a pathetic fizz and a tiny flicker of lighter that might have been able to cure a hangnail.
"Flynn… it's not working."
He opened his eyes and shifted his head to look at her. "What do you mean?"
Her heart sped up as the terrifying truth settled over her. "I – I can't use magic." She clutched her throbbing skull and tried to hold on to what little calm she had left. "I hit my head pretty bad. It must have messed up my ability to cast." She took a few frantic breaths. "I can't heal you."
Flynn put on a valiant effort of not looking worried. "Ok… that is a problem. It's likely not permanent, though. Your brain is fuzzy right now, but give it some time to straighten things out and I'm sure you'll make it work."
"Right, ok. I'm so sorry, but you're going to have to wait a bit."
"That's fine… I'm certainly not going anywhere."
It broke Estelle's heart to leave him like that, but there was nothing she could do. They would just have to wait here until her concussion faded enough that she could get magic working again. "Is there anything I can do for you? Are you bleeding from anywhere else?"
Flynn thought for a moment. "I… don't think so. It's hard to focus on anything else, but I'm wearing armour. I hit my head on the ground when I landed, but I didn't lose consciousness so I don't think it's serious."
"I'm going to examine you just in case, ok? I'll be very careful not to move you or the pole."
"Thank you."
Flynn was alarmingly calm about this. Of course, he was probably still too hyped up on adrenaline and shock for the pain to fully set in unless she aggravated it. Estelle was also still shaky from the accident, and her hands trembled as she cautiously examined Flynn's legs for any sign of injury. She was terrified that any touch might wiggle him enough to cause pain.
Luckily, Flynn was right about his armour. He was dinged up in a few places, but the worst of his injuries were bruises… other than the obvious one that still filled her with dread.
"Estellise, you need to worry about yourself. Your head is still bleeding."
The left side of her head was caked in blood, which clumped her hair together. She looked around for something to use as a knife and spotted Flynn's sword. When she pulled it out, she only got the hilt and a few inches of steel.
Flynn winced. "Damn. That was a good sword."
"I'm sure you can get another one."
"Right. When I get back to the castle I'll request an identical one be made." A long silence hung in the air. Neither of them felt the need to specify "if you get back to the castle."
Estelle pulled off the white part of her dress and used the broken sword to cut a couple of long strips. She folded one into a thick pad, held it against the cut on her head, and then tied it in place with the other. She took the rest of her dress and folded it into a makeshift pillow.
"Here, let me try to make you more comfortable."
"I don't think it really makes that much of a difference at this point."
"Please. It's the least I can do." She gently lifted his head and slipped the dress under, so at least he wasn't resting on the hard metal ground. It really was the least she could do. Estelle felt so helpless without being able to cast healing artes. Healing people had been her greatest ability for all her life, and now, when she needed it most, she was useless. "What do we do now?"
"Wait. When you concussion subsides, pull this out of me and we'll get out of here. Don't even touch it until you know you can cast First Aid, though."
Estelle nodded, feeling guilty for relying on Flynn to make the plans even now. He was hurt much worse than her, but she was terrified and on the verge of panic while Flynn was able to keep things under control.
Not sure what else to do, she decided to investigate the heat. It didn't flicker and crackle like a growing fire, but she wanted to check just in case. After reassuring Flynn that she would be back in a minute, she crept down the hall and then into the side passage. Here, she had to carefully balance with one foot on the floor and the other on the wall due to the slant.
She immediately saw the source of light. A massive furnace leaned against the wall, it's banged and dented chimney disappearing into the ceiling. The front door was as big as she was, and through the slats she saw piles of burning coals. At least this would keep them warm.
Unlike Estelle, Flynn had exact memories of the accident and he envied her for being able to forget them. They'd been on their way out, celebrating a job well done and chatting about dinner plans when they got back to Zaphias, and then a low rumble pricked his ears.
Seconds later, the hallway exploded. There had been a boom so loud it temporarily deafened him, then ripped metal flying all around. He remembered flying forward and not knowing which way was up. Everything had happened so fast, but time seemed to slow down long enough to remember hitting the ground and then metal tearing straight through his abdomen. He could remember every centimetre of the iron rod crushing through muscle and intestine.
He had no idea how long he'd lain here, because his best guess was eternity and that was probably wrong. In any case, the pain was beginning to catch up to him. It could be worse, right? The pole was only about an inch in diameter, and it had missed his lungs. No, instead he'd just ruined his intestines. You didn't really need those, right?
Abdominal muscles automatically clenched around the pole, trying to plug the wound as best they could. This sent shocks of pain rocketing through him, enough to bring tears to his eyes.
I'm so screwed.
Could Estelle's magic reconstruct ripped and crushed intestines? Probably not. She could close wounds, but getting his internal organs in the right order after this would require some serious surgery.
Speaking of Estelle, she was now pacing around the hallway. This was a good sign, because it meant she was getting control of her dizziness and hopefully she'd be able to heal him soon.
Damn, he really hoped she could heal him soon.
She also seemed to be on the verge of panicking. "Estellise, sit down. You should rest."
She paused to face him. "I know, but… I hate just sitting there. I hate feeling like I'm doing nothing."
"Sit down. Rest. Talk to me."
"Ok." She sat near his head, leaning against the wall. "About what?"
"I don't know. Anything." As long as it took his mind off the six feet of steel wreaking havoc on his internal organs it would be appreciated.
"Um… well I read a book the other day. It was about a knight who got kidnapped by a dragon and then the princess had to rescue him.
"I like the sound of that." Distantly, something clanged as the Heracles settled into its new position. This sent tremors through the walls and the pole vibrated. Flynn's hand clutched his stomach and he squeezed his eyes shut with a moan.
"A-are you ok?"
"F-f-fine. Uhn… I th-think I could do with some rescuing too, heh."
"I'm so sorry, Flynn."
She was on the verge of tears again. "There's no reason for you to be upset. This wasn't…" he had to stop for breath. He took shallow breaths, because deep breaths put strain on his abdominal muscles so he was constantly short of breath. "Wasn't your fault."
"But I… I can't save you."
"You'll be able to save me shortly. Concentrate on resting and getting your head in order. We have plenty of time."
"But you're in so much pain."
That was an understatement. "I won't deny that. However, I am not actively dying. As long as I don't move, I can probably stay here indefinitely."
"Ok…" she took a deep breath and reached out to grab his hand. She squeezed, and Flynn wasn't sure if she was comforting him or the other way around.
Estelle tried to keep Flynn entertained. He put on a tough act, but there was no question he was in an abhorrent amount of pain. When he thought she wasn't looking he let a grimace slip onto his face and distant vibrations from the Heracles rattled the pole. Every time this happened he seized up and ground his teeth, and Estelle caught the beginnings of smothered curse words.
"So, after performing in that play, they let us keep the costumes. For some reason, though, Yuri kept wearing his around. He said it was comfortable and a nice change from his normal clothes, but we almost got arrested once for disturbing the peace when he frightened some small children."
Flynn smiled, purposefully avoiding a laugh that would shake his stomach. "I suppose getting arrested didn't seem too abnormally inconvenient for Yuri."
"No, I guess not. I talked the Knights out of arresting him, though."
"Good. He doesn't need any more of a record than he already has."
Estelle repositioned herself, leaning against the metal wall. "It was worrying at the time, but looking back, I guess it's pretty funny."
"I find that a lot of Yuri stories are like that. Did I ever tell you about the time he got us stuck on a roof?"
"No. How did that happen?"
"He threw a ball too high and it got stuck in a tree, so he decided to go up to the roof of the building next to the tree to get it down. I followed him up there, but it turned out the roof access door locked automatically and we got stranded up there."
Estelle covered her mouth. "Oh, no. How long were you up there?"
"A few hours. We managed to get the ball down and then wrote 'help we're stuck on the roof' on it with a pen and threw it to the street."
Estelle could picture the scene so clearly. Yuri calmly sitting around, enjoying the view of the sky, while Flynn paced in circles and worried about dying of exposure or starvation. "How old were you?"
"About thirteen or so."
"You two sure got into a lot of trouble, didn't you?"
"We sure did."
"You know… it's funny. All three of us hardly ever hang out together."
"What do you mean?"
Her fingers drummed on her knee as she tried to put it into words. "Well… you and I are really good friends, right? And you and Yuri are best friends, and Yuri is one of my best friends. The three of us are all so close, but we're not close together, as a trio."
"I suppose you're right."
Estelle had never really thought about it before, because Yuri and Flynn seemed to come from two separate worlds. Flynn was her friend from home, her first ever friend and the man who represented everything she loved about life in Zaphias. Then there was Yuri, her adventure friend. He'd burst into her life and taken her to far off places, becoming someone as close to her as a brother and representing the life she longed for away from the confines of the castle. She knew, obviously, that they were close friends in their own right, but her mind still sorted them in different worlds.
"I think the three of us need to do something together."
"Like what?"
She would be offended by how distracted he seemed, but that horrible metal pole was a valid excuse. Instead she just wished she could do something more to take his mind off his pain. "I'm not sure. Maybe… a picnic?"
"Pardon?"
"Yeah, a picnic," she said with growing confidence. "We can all prepare the food. Well…" she glanced at Flynn and thought about the time they'd snuck to the castle kitchens at midnight and he'd tried to put garlic powder in their cookies before she stopped him. "Maybe Yuri and I can take care of that. But all three of us will go out and have a nice afternoon together. It will be so fun!"
Flynn forced a smile. "Yeah, that does sound nice."
Estelle smiled and closed her eyes. Her head still throbbed, but rather than getting better, it was getting worse. Earlier the headache had concentrated on the side of her head where she'd hit it, but now it had expanded across the front and throbbed in her forehead. She massaged the sides of her head, but that didn't do anything to help.
"How's your head?"
"It still hurts."
"I'm starting to get a headache, too."
"Oh, no, you have enough injuries to worry about." She gently rested her fingers on his head and brushed his hair. It seemed like all she could do to comfort him when she couldn't heal.
"It's right here." He rested his hand on his forehead. "I don't think I hit my head there."
"That's where mine is, too."
Flynn knit his eyebrows in concern. "Hm…"
"Flynn? What is it?"
"Lady Estellise, the light… what's causing this illumination?"
She glanced to the glowing corridor. "There's a furnace nearby. There's burning coal in it."
"I see… is the furnace damaged in any way?"
Estelle tried to remember what it looked like. She didn't want to go check if she didn't have to, because leaving Flynn alone like this seemed cruel. "Um… I think, maybe a little bit? It's slanted and dented in a few places."
Flynn's worried face grew deeper. "Does it appear that the chimney is bent out of operation or anything like that?"
"Maybe. Why do you ask?"
Flynn spoke slowly and calmly. "There is a chance… if the furnace is damaged and the flue isn't venting properly… gas given off by burning coal may be accumulating in here."
Estelle gasped, and then slammed her hand over her mouth. "Gas?" She pulled the collar of her dress over her face. "What kind of gas?"
He closed his eyes for a moment and his face tightened as a distant clang reverberated through the metal. After letting out a pained breath, he said, "Coal… when it's burned, coal emits carbon monoxide."
Estelle had heard of that before, enough to know that it was deadly. "What can we do?"
"You need to get out of here." He still hadn't opened his eyes. "If you stay down here too much longer, you'll pass out and we'll both suffocate from the gas."
"I can't, Flynn. I'd have to move you to get out."
Flynn nodded slowly. "I know. You're going to have to pull this out of me and move the debris blocking the exit."
"I haven't recovered from my concussion yet, though. I can't heal you."
"That's why…" he finally opened his eyes and met Estelle's. He put so much effort into keeping his gaze level, but Estelle had known him long enough to notice the tremor of fear. "You're going to have to leave me."
She didn't even consider this. "Absolutely not."
"Lady Estellise, be reasonable. There's no point in both of us dying."
"That's why we're both going to live!" Pulling that bar out of Flynn before she got her magic working again was a death sentence and she would never be able to do that. "We just need to wait a little longer, ok?"
Flynn closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "Ok. We'll wait a little bit longer."
"I won't let you die, Flynn. We have to go on that picnic, right?" When he didn't answer, she said, "Promise me you'll go on the picnic with me and Yuri."
"All right. I promise."
Flynn didn't know how much longer it had been. His perception of time was distorted by disorienting pain that made a minute feel like a century. Through it all, Estelle kept talking. Flynn was barely even paying attention to the stories she told now, because his mind drifted to the inevitably future.
He estimated the carbon monoxide would reach a fatal level within an hour. The effects of a concussion could take days to subside. They were going to suffocate long before Estelle could heal the hole in his stomach. Part of him wanted to ask Estelle to please just get it over with because he was going to die anyway and lingering was agony, but he could bear to put Estelle through the torture of killing him. She would have to eventually, but he'd put it off as long as he could.
"Flynn?"
He blinked a few times and shifted his gaze to hers. "Yes?"
"Sorry. I wasn't sure if you were still conscious."
He smiled softly. "Yes, Lady Estellise. I'm still here," he murmured. It was hard to talk forcefully, because that required getting a lot of air into his lungs, which would put strain on his abdominal muscles and for one very loud and painful reason he wanted to avoid doing that.
Estelle took his hand in hers and sat quietly, staring into the darkness. "Do you remember when we first met, Flynn?"
"Of course. In the library." Being a knight stationed at the castle came with some perks, like access to the castle library. Flynn had wanted to learn everything he could about how the government functioned and the empire's history and spent countless hours studying."
"You asked me what 'bourgeoisie' meant."
Flynn smiled at the memory. "You mean the 'bor-gee-oy-see'." Flynn learned to read and write from shop signs around the lower quarter and newspaper headlines. Studying academic books in the castle library had been quite challenging when he started out.
"You used to mispronounce a lot of words," she said with a small giggle.
"But you were always there to help." He hadn't known she was the princess at first. He'd just been so stumped on that word so he asked the person sitting closest to him, a girl at the table over that he'd seen a few times. Asking her for help when a new word gave him trouble gradually turned into sitting together to read, which eventually became getting kicked out of the library for chatting and giggling and disturbing the other visitors. Then she'd dragged him to the garden so they could sit and talk as loud as they wanted to.
"I planned it that way, you know." Her thumb rubbed gentle circles on the side of his hand. "I looked up your unit's schedule to see when you'd have free time."
"Did you really?"
Her reddening face shifted away. "I really liked talking to you. You were the first person to ever really talk to me. Everyone else just talked to the princess."
"Possibly helped by not knowing you were the princess."
"Yes, but even after you found out. You were the first person to really listen to what I had to say."
"I don't know how else you expected me to react to someone as interesting and friendly as yourself." Estelle was certainly odd. All his life, it had been just Flynn and Yuri. They were inseparable for most of his childhood, and when Yuri left the Knights it was like losing his shadow. Those first few weeks in the castle had been the loneliest in his life, but then he'd met the funny girl he'd met in the library and found someone just as lonely as him.
She really was quite beautiful, he thought as she stared down at him with wet eyes. When they'd first met, she'd been hardly more than a girl, but in the intervening four years she'd grown up almost without his noticing. She wasn't the delicate princess who needed protecting anymore. In fact, she'd grown into a strong young woman who was the one doing the protecting here.
"Oh, Flynn…" She tightened the grip on his hand. "I'm going to get you out of here. Just wait."
Estelle leaned against the wall, hugging her knees. Her persistent headache only grew stronger and she was starting to feel nauseated too. Every breath brought her ever-increasing amounts of toxic gas down. It must have been over an hour now and she still couldn't get any kind of magic to work. She told herself to stay strong for Flynn, but it was getting hard. The only light was the soft glow from the coals and distant creaks and groans echoed through the metal halls. Every time Heracles made a noise, it sent vibrations through the metal and Flynn grimaced, his stomach clenching around the pole.
His face was deathly pale and she wondered how much blood was managing to haemorrhage inside him even with the pole plugging the wound. They had to get out of here, but if her magic didn't come back soon… Flynn needed medical attention really bad and it killed her to not be able to provide it.
Estelle first realized she could heal things when she was four years old. She'd been out in the garden with her nanny when she saw a cat chasing a squirrel. She'd chased the cat away and then run to the aid of the injured squirrel.
"Don't touch it!" her nanny had snapped. "I'll summon a knight to put the poor thing out of its misery."
But Estelle hadn't listened. The moment her nanny turned away, Estelle got on her hands and knees and poked the squirrel. "Are you ok?" There was a lot of blood and it was pretty scary, but she couldn't stand to not try to help. She didn't even know what she did next, but her intense desire to make the squirrel better had erupted in a burst of light that nearly made her nanny faint with surprise.
After that came twelve years of trying to understand herself, her power, and what it meant. It had only been recently that she finally understood who she was and what her power truly meant, but the one thing she'd been certain of since that day when she was four was that she was a healer.
So what did a healer do if they couldn't heal?
"Estellise?"
When she raised her eyes, she realized her vision was blurred by tears. With a sniff and a, "What?" she rubbed the tears away.
"Please don't cry."
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I'm so useless, Flynn."
"Useless?" He raised his eyebrows. "What in the world gave you that idea?"
"What good is a healer if she can't heal anyone?"
Flynn was quiet for a moment and Estelle looked away. She felt so pathetically helpless here. All she could do was listen to the Heracles groan and the echoes of water dripping far away. Flynn was dying right in front of her, but now that she needed them the most, her powers had vanished. She wished she could be strong like Flynn, or brave like Yuri, or smart like Rita, or a million other things her friends could be. But she was the healer, and without that, she was nothing.
"Is that all you think you're good for?"
She rubbed her eyes on her sleeve, but realized part of the blurriness was from how dizzy she felt. Was that from the concussion or the carbon monoxide? "W-what?"
"You're kind." Heracles groaned again, and Estelle could actually see the pole tremble from vibration. Flynn gasped, his feet twitched, and he pounded one white-knuckled fist against the ground. His chest heaved and tears escaped his eyes, but he got himself under control. "And… y-you're smart. You've read m-more… more books than anyone I know. Ah… you helped me become a… a b-better reader. You've fought… more monsters than I… e-ever have. Yuri said you're skilled enough with… uhn… with your sword to g-give me a run for my money. You fight for justice… and you comfort others when they're scared…" He closed his eyes and rested one pale hand on his stomach. "Your smile cheers me up when I'm sad… and you make Yuri smile like… like I've never seen him before. You were a dear friend to me when I was alone… and you listened to me like I thought no one else could."
Estelle gaped at him the entire time he spoke. When he finished, he forced his eyes open and gave her a little smile. "Th-that is what you're good for, Estellise. You are so much more than your power."
She couldn't keep her voice steady if she tried. "O-oh, Flynn." She fell forward, burying her face in his chest. She really fell, too, because as soon as she leaned too far forward, her balance gave out and gravity took over. Flynn grunted as she landed and her heart panged for hurting him.
Tears flowed freely into the fabric of Flynn's shirt, and he raised one hand to her back to softly squeeze her. She wasn't crying because she was useless or even because she was scared of dying. She cried because Flynn was the most amazing man she'd ever met and she was so terrified she was going to lose him.
"Sh… it's going to be ok."
That just made her cry more, because Flynn was in so much pain but still set his priorities on comforting her. She wished they could be in the library again, giggling over the bizarre spelling of 'business' ("It ought to be 'bussy-ness' Flynn said through tears of laughter). He was her first friend, the first person to put the effort into getting to know the girl behind the title, the first person to make her feel like the girl behind the title truly mattered. He wasn't a gentleman like so many nobles she encountered, but he was something even better: a gentle man, one who was kind, honourable, and so special to her she almost couldn't stand it. Most important of all, he made her feel like she was special too, and not just her title.
Flynn let her lie on him until she'd run out of tears. Even when she'd cried herself out, she stayed where she was. His chest was solid with the chainmail underneath his shirt, but she took comfort in his warmth and heartbeat, even if it was speeding up and growing weak. She lay still, too distraught to feel guilty about getting tears and snot on Flynn's shirt. One of Flynn's arms wrapped around her shoulders, while his other hand gently brushed a lock of hair away from her tear-stained face. She could have lain with him for days.
It was hard to accurately judge dizziness while lying down. If Flynn could tell his head was spinning even while lying motionless, it must be particularly bad. His head throbbed like there was a metal pole through his skull and he was terrified this nausea was going to progress to actual vomiting. Just imaging his stomach spasming and clenching while throwing up when it already hurt so much made him feel ill.
The carbon monoxide was getting to him. He already seemed to be holding onto consciousness by a thread. In a way, he welcomed suffocation. It was getting hard to breathe and every strained breath put added pressure on his already aching gut, but soon he'd slip into blackness forever and never have to deal with pain again. The only thing that stopped him from putting his head down and letting the poison take him was the weight on his chest. Estelle, at least, had a chance to get out of here.
"Estellise," he murmured, stroking her hair. She didn't stir and his heart jolted. Had she passed out already? No, no, no… he couldn't let her die here. It would be so pointless. The exit wasn't too far away; she just had to move him and walk out. "Estellise… Lady Estellise!"
Her eyes snapped open with a gasp. "I – oh!"
She pushed herself up, swayed as dizziness overtook her, and fell on him again. This jolted his body and winced as his abdominal muscles clamped around the pole again. He couldn't stop a grunt of pain and every muscle tensed.
"I'm so sorry, Flynn!" She pulled away instead of bolting up and sat on her hands and knees. "How long was I asleep?"
"I'm not sure. Long enough." Her eyelids still drooped and she swayed to stay upright. "There's too much carbon monoxide. We're out of time."
Her face fell further than it already was when she realized what he meant. "No. We have to wait longer."
"We don't have time to wait." If they waited too much longer, they were both going to pass out and suffocate. Estelle had to leave now.
"Let me try one more time." She held her hands over him and closed her eyes, concentrating hard. A few golden sparks erupted from her fingertips, but nothing that did Flynn any good. She stared at her hands. "No… come on, please! I need to do this!"
"It's not going to work, Lady Estellise. Your concussion likely won't subside for at least another day, and we'll have long died by then. You need to move me and get out now."
She shook her head slowly. "No… No, I can't. Flynn, I can't leave you and I especially can't kill you myself."
She was right. He looked into her teary green eyes and could have kicked himself for even thinking of putting her through that. He couldn't let her be the one to pull the beam out of him; he would have to do it himself. Of course, Estelle would never let him do that and she was strong enough to pin his arms down in this condition. "It's the only way."
"Flynn… no, please, we have to wait longer. Just – just five more minutes."
All that would happen in five minutes would be that he'd be even weaker and less likely to be able to pull this out. "We can't wait. We need to face the reality that I'm not getting out of here."
"I can't go back to Zaphias without you. I just can't."
"Yes, you can. You're a strong woman, Estellise."
She shook her head more vigorously. "Ok, then I don't want to."
"I can't let you die here needlessly. Please understand that letting you suffocate here when you could easily live if you gave up on me is as painful to me as leaving me is to you."
"But… Flynn…"
Her puffy red eyes filled with despair managed to be the most painful thing in the room. "I know we're both determined to save each other… but I'm the only one who actually can. Please… Estelle. Let me save you."
"I can't… I can't…" Her breath came in gasps. Her eyes squeezed tight, tears leaking down her face. Her whole body trembled and then her shaking hand rested on the side of his face. "…Ok."
He managed a slight smile. "Thank you. There are some messages I need you to take back. Can you do that for me?"
A small, tight nod.
"Tell His Highness that I'm sorry, that it's been an honour to serve as the commandant, and that I'd like Sodia to be me successor." Now that it was time, it was so hard to think of all the people he needed to say goodbye to, and how to fit all his feelings into short enough phrases that Estelle could remember them all. "Tell Sodia that she is the finest knight I know and that I am proud to call her not only my subordinate but also my friend."
Heracles shifted, sending a strong vibration through the pole. He gasped and his muscles tensed. A cry threatened to break out but he clamped his lips together and smothered it. Estelle watched him worriedly so he took a tight breath. "F-fine. I'm… fine." He didn't even bother trying to make his voice sound believable, but Estelle didn't call him out on his lie.
"And… what should I tell Yuri?"
There was the question. What should he tell Yuri? How could he end over fifteen years of friendship with a succinct message to be delivered by a third party? "Tell him… tell him I'm sorry. That… that I'm so proud of everything he's done and that my greatest disappointment is not seeing how much farther he'll go. Any grievances between us, however minor, are forgiven. And everything else… he already knows."
She nodded slowly. "Ok. I'll tell them."
There was one other person he needed to give final words to, and in theory this should be the easiest because she was right here. There were so many things he wanted to tell her but he couldn't find the words. "I… Lady Estellise, I…" She watched him closely, her face so close to his, expectant. "It's time."
Her hand slipped to his shoulder and gripped tight. "Wait."
He suppressed a frustrated sigh. "We've already discussed this. There is no more time to wait." She was never going to let him do this, was she?
"Five more minutes."
"You said that five minutes ago."
"Five more minutes!"
Flynn closed his eyes and pulled his hand to his shoulder to cover hers. With a smile, he said, "Lady Estellise, you're the most stubbornly determined girl… woman I've ever met."
"W-well, maybe I am! But I can't just let you die."
"Asking you for help reading was one of the best decisions of my life."
"You promised you'd go on a picnic with me and Yuri. You promised."
"Yes, but…"
"Don't you dare die, Flynn. I… I love you."
His eyes shot open and his grip on her hand tensed. Her words had taken him by surprise, because years of thinking of her as the princess it was his duty to defend had left no room for such speculation. In that moment, though, he was only marginally surprised to discover he loved her, too.
And because he loved her, he couldn't let her soft heart allow herself to die. He squeezed her hand. "Ok. You're right, I did promise to go on that picnic with you. We'll wait five more minutes." Because he knew that in five minutes she'd demand another five, he added, "Why don't you go look for another exit? How far did you explore down the furnace hallway? Perhaps there's another way out without moving me."
"Yes, that's right! I didn't actually look that hard. I'll be right back!"
"Be safe."
She jumped up, stumbled, and grabbed the wall for balance. She took a moment to stabilize herself and then hurried away as quickly as she could.
Flynn wasn't sure how long she'd be gone. He doubted the hallway to the furnace would provide any miraculous escape, and as soon as she realized it was a dead-end she'd be right back here to prevent him from letting her escape. He had to take this chance, before he lost the strength or resolve.
Shaky hands gripped the pole. This was going to hurt… but he just had to grit his teeth and get through it and then it would all be over. Estelle would be devastated when she came back and found him dead, but at least she would live and she wouldn't have to kill him herself.
He took a tight breath and pulled. He only made it about an inch before the searing agony nearly knocked him unconscious. He could feel every rough millimeter sliding through his organs, hot blood pooling under his back. Couldn't stop now. He pulled again.
His arms shook with the strain but he pushed through it. Too painful to go slow. Rip it out and get it over with. His teeth gnashed together and every centimetre of the pole brought new waves of agony rushing across his body. He had to keep pulling because at this point, if he stopped he'd still bleed to death soon but not fast enough to put him out of his misery.
With a burst of strength he jerked it the rest of the way out. Blinded by agony, deafened by a scream that turned out to be his, he barely heard the footsteps racing toward him. Cool air hit his intestines and hot blood gushed out his stomach and out his back. He could almost hear the alarm bells clanging in his brain.
Excruciating pain turned his vision white, but something glowing before his face. Before his agonized mind could even begin questioning what it was, a new pain shot through his torso. He'd thought ripping the pole out was the upper limit of pain a human body could produce, but when he heard a sizzle and smelled burning flesh he realized just how wrong he was. A new strata of agony opened before him, but before he could truly explore just how much pain was possible, he mercifully passed out.
Estelle realized what Flynn was planning midway to the furnace. Something about his tone of voice finally clicked and it dawned on her that when he said, "be safe", what he really meant was, "goodbye."
She ran to the end of the hall, falling to her knees because the slanted corridor and overwhelming dizziness knocked her down. She saw Flynn grip the pole and knew it was too late to stop him. For ten seconds she did nothing but sit on her banged knees and stare in shock as Flynn – her Flynn – seized up and screamed. He was going to die and al she could do was watch.
No! She wouldn't let this happen. Maybe she couldn't heal him with magic, but that didn't make her powerless. There were other ways to heal a wound, and she wasn't going to let Flynn slip away without doing everything she could.
It would be so much easier to think of a plan if her head wasn't so fuzzy. Curse this concussion and curse the busted furnace poisoning the air. If only the coal –
The coal! Inspiration dawned and she wasted no time to think it over. Pushing through her pounding head, she leapt to her feet and dashed to the furnace. She snatched a metal rod off the ground, some broken piece she didn't have time to analyze. Heat from the furnace blasted her face when she pried the door opened and shoved the rod in. When the end of the metal glowing red with heat, she ran back to Flynn.
She nearly fell on the burning iron multiple times but she managed to throw herself at Flynn's side without burning herself. She reached him just as he got the metal out of his stomach. The bloodstained beam leaned into the ground next to Flynn, but she barely noticed. The only thing that registered was the volumes of blood pouring out the hole in Flynn's gut.
She took a deep breath, whispered, "Sorry, Flynn. This is going to hurt," and then slipped the burning iron into the hole. His body convulsed and a fresh scream tore out of his throat. Her chest ached for causing him so much pain, but it was this or watch him die.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry." She went as gently as she could, cauterizing all sides of the hole. It was about an inch in diameter and cut all the way through to the other side. His intestines must be a mess, but if she could just keep him alive until they got to a proper doctor in Zaphias…
The scent of burnt meat clogged her nose and tears poured down her face, but she stopped seeing blood so she considered the job done. She tossed the iron aside and then ripped a few more length of fabric from her white dress. With hands fumbling so badly from nerves she could barely move, she wrapped the make-shift bandages around Flynn's waist and tied them tightly. Please let this be enough.
Now she just had to get them out of here, because the carbon monoxide was still deadly. It was easy to move the metal blockage aside now that its support wasn't embedded in Flynn, so she cleared the path and saw daylight at the end of the tunnel. "Come on, Flynn, we're getting out of here."
Flynn was significantly heavier than her and she didn't stop to peel his armour off first, but that didn't matter. So much energy fired through her veins, she felt like she could lift a horse. She pulled his arms around her neck and lifted him onto her back. He was too tall, so his feet dragged as she carried him up the sloping path.
When they hit the fresh air, she collapsed into the sand. Flynn's weight crushed her so she squirmed out from under him and rolled him on his back. So far, the bandages were still white, which meant her cauterization job had managed to keep him from bleeding any more. Of course, he now had internal third degree burns to worry about. But he was alive, at least for now, and that's all that mattered.
"I did it, Flynn," she whispered to him as she lay, exhausted, beside him. "You were right. I can still do things even without magic. You h-have to wake up so I can show you."
She was too tired to go any further. The horses they'd come on were still tethered to a tree just off the beach, but she didn't have the strength to sit up, let alone ride a horse. Her head pounded and it was all she could do to keep from throwing up. They'd told knights they would be coming out here, so when they took too long to come back, a party would be sent out to investigate. They could wait for them here, in the fresh air.
She snuggled close to Flynn, taking comfort in his warmth. As long as he was warm, he was still alive.
"Rise and shine, sleeping beauty."
That was a familiar voice.
"Hm… Yuri…?"
"Sorry to wake you. Nurse said to wake you up if you were asleep to make sure you weren't in a coma or something."
There was hair in his face and a body close to his, but Flynn wasn't quite ready to open his eyes yet.
"So, you still ok? You remember your name and everything?"
"Yes," came Estelle's voice close to his ear.
"You wanna tell me why you're all cozy with Flynn? What, did they run out of beds in the infirmary?"
"Oh… well… um…"
Yuri just laughed. "I should have seen this coming." The bed compressed as another weight added to it. "Sodia told me what happened. Man, look what kind of a mess you two get into when I leave you in Zaphias unsupervised."
Estelle giggled. "Heh… sorry."
"I'm glad you're all right. How's Flynn?"
Her soft fingers traced his arm. "He'll be ok… I can't get magic to work properly until this concussion clears up, but the doctor said he's over the hill and all signs point to recovery. After we got back to Zaphias, he was in surgery for a really long time…"
Her voice trembled with fearful memories and Flynn heard fabric rustled as Yuri embraced her. For a split second he thought, should I be jealous? It only lasted a second. Of all the things that could come between him and Estelle, Yuri would never be one of them.
"Sorry I couldn't wait with you. I came as soon as I got your letter."
"That's ok. I understand."
"So now we just have to wait for him to wake up, right?"
He'd been awake long enough now that he managed to open his eyes. "I'm…" his voice cracked it was so dry. He swallowed and tried again. "I'm awake, actually."
"Oh, Flynn!" Estelle fell on him again, hugging him so tightly he could barely breathe.
"Oof… Lady Estellise, please…"
Yuri pulled her back by the shoulder. "Hey, let him breathe."
"Heh, sorry, Flynn. I'm so glad to see you awake. You've been unconscious for days."
He smiled. "Sorry to worry you. I'm fine now."
"Except you still have a hole in your stomach," Yuri pointed out.
"Ah… yes, there's that." He cautiously held his hand over his side and through the sheet and hospital gown he felt a thick layer of bandages, and most likely enough stiches to sew a dress underneath. A deep, throbbing ache spread from the wound, but he'd been given enough medication that it was bearable
"We'll have to put our picnic plans on hold for a little while," Estelle said.
"What's this about a picnic?"
"You're coming on a picnic with us, ok, Yuri?"
He raised his eyebrows. "Am I?"
"Flynn promised."
"Ha, ok then. Yeah, we can go when Flynn's not impersonating Swiss cheese."
"I'm touched by your concern. Truly." Flynn's eyes slipped closed again. Staying awake was hard work when all his bodily processes were dedicated to heal the damage to his abdomen.
"I'm going to head out; looks like Flynn's falling asleep again."
"Sorry," Flynn mumbled. "I wanted to talk more, but…"
Yuri stood and grinned. "Hey, just do me a favour and don't go running off into danger without me again, ok? Clearly you fall to pieces on your own." To Estelle, he said, "I'll be at the Comet. Karol and Judy are here, too, if you want to visit."
"Oh, ok. I think I'm going to stay here for now, though."
"Thought so. See you around." He waved over his shoulder on his way out.
When he was gone, Estelle lay down again. The bed in the castle's infirmary was narrow, but she found room pressed tight against him. "I'm so glad you're all right."
"All thanks to you. Thank you for not giving up on me, even when I had."
She draped her arm across his chest and nestled her head against the crook of his neck. "I couldn't have done it without you believing in me."
"You've always been so much more than just the princess who could heal."
"And you're so much more than just the Knights' perfect commander."
Her breath tickled his throat and her hair irritated his cheek, but he couldn't bring himself to pull away. "After our picnic with Yuri, maybe we should go on another one, just you and me… Estelle." The name felt weird, but also very right.
She smiled and pressed even closer. "Yeah… that sounds nice."