Summary: Myra knew the reasons why. First, the faction system could fail at any moment with Abnegation keeping its' members on the counsel. Second, there were secrets that were being hushed up by the council members from the City's founders. Third, the City's resources were truly being wasted on the ungrateful factionless. Fourth, there were threats all around them. Fifth, because mother said so...
When her mother, Jeanine Matthews, leader of Erudite, decides that it is time to put her plan into action half of the faction is left to wonder why. Why does Jeanine want to remove Abnegation from their spot on the City's council? Why does she test random people at all hours in the night in her private lab? Why does she seek an alliance with Dauntless?
While half of the faction hears stories about Jeanine's true plans, only a few of them actually know the true reason. And one of those people is none other than her daughter, Myra. Myra was taught these things as a young child in the faction of Erudite. It was ingrained into her mind. She trusted and believed her mother in everything. That was until her mother got her first love involved.
I do not own Divergent. Credit goes to Veronica Roth.
He held me closer than I thought possible and I knew that our time had come to an end. We had been through so much together and now it was all ending. I shook my head against his chest causing him to let out a short huff. I knew he wasn't pleased with how we were saying goodbye.
"It doesn't have to end this way," I told him.
"I have to do it. You know I do," he replied.
Shaking my head back and forth again I looked up to him. "That's what you think. She can always find someone else to do it. It doesn't..."
"Myra," he said my name softly.
I enjoyed the way he said my name. My name felt like it belonged to an angel the way he said it. This was probably going to be the last time I ever heard him say my name. I couldn't help but close my eyes at that thought. I willed my all my might that the tear that was forming stay in its place. I was not going to cry in front of him. I was not.
"Don't leave," I whispered.
"You'll do fine," he assured. "Besides," there was a tightness in his voice and I opened my eyes trying to blink back the tears to see that there was also an intensity in his jaw. "You have him to help you get by."
"You know he's not the one I want with me," I protested.
"He may not be the one you want now but I know that in time you'll come to forget me."
"That isn't fair," I shook my head. "You're not being fair. You're basically pushing me onto him. You're not even trying to fight for me, to fight for us," I accused but I knew that he was right. I had made a choice whether I knew it or not.
"What are you talking about? I am doing this for us. I'm fighting for us now."
"No, you're not. You're fighting for her cause," I argued. "You're going over there and for what?"
"To keep this faction safe, to keep you safe," he reiterated.
"But you're doing it at another faction. The chances of you actually making it are not favorable. Arthur never made it. He was the tallest, strongest one of them all and yet even he didn't make it. You don't belong there. Please, just let her send someone else. Stay here with me," I pleaded.
"I'm going to make it. Not only am I going to pass but I'm going to get first ranking. I'm going to be a leader there," he said determined.
"You can't be!"
"Do you doubt that I'll make it?"
"No," I instantly replied.
"You think I won't make it. You think I'll fail just as everyone else had," he accused.
"No," I shot back once more.
"Then why shouldn't I go?"
"I want you to be here in Erudite. I want you to stay. I want you with me!"
"Like I said," he finally pulled his arms away from me and took a couple steps back. I never thought I would see him look so cold. "You'll have him here to stay with you."
"Stop it," I told him. "You know that..."
"No," he waved his hand. "You need to cut it out Myra. This is what is going to happen. I've been chosen to go and that is where I am going."
That discussion happened the night before his choosing ceremony, the night before he chose to leave me, the night before the one person that I love was taken away from me completely.
"Eric Coulter," Jack Kang called his name.
Eric Coulter was my first kiss. I remembered and always cherished that day that he leaned over in the Erudite library and pressed his lips to mine. It was such a brand new feeling. It was also shocking but so brand new that I didn't want to let it go. Eric let out a small chuckle when I pulled on his jacket to come closer and kiss me again.
I had hoped that he would be my first in everything. The first time he walked me home, the first time he held my hand, the first time I fell off to sleep in his arms while we had our first date, a picnic in one of the nearby parks. Those all belonged to Eric Coulter. The night before my mother and he had dinner was the first time that he had told me he loved me. He held my hand warmly between the both of his and whispered it before kissing me goodnight. My heart was still beating quickly in my chest, ready to explode, when I fell off to sleep that night. That all belonged to Eric Coulter.
Somehow as Eric walked towards the platform the day of his choosing, I remembered all those 'first' moments in time that we shared with one another. They were all slipping away with every step that he took. Little did I know that he had reserved another 'first' for me that I would encounter the next morning of my life.
I watched from my seat, next to Edward, as Eric took the knife from Jack Kang and cut his hand spilling his blood onto the Dauntless coals. I looked over to the right to see my mother smiling proudly.
Every year for the past five years she chose someone who had excelled at her tests to infiltrate Dauntless and work them from the inside. However, every year that initiate that she sent would fail miserably at their task. None of them were able to get in with the leadership there. None of them had ever ranked so high. All of them were just as determined and eager as Eric. I feared that he would end up the same.
You may wonder what made Eric follow my mother's ideals and conform to her thinking. Perhaps he had a bad home life, was abused, or even blackmailed into doing it. But all of that is wrong. My mother took an interest in certain driven overachieving Erudite youths such as Eric and fed their minds with her beliefs. She didn't prey on the weak. They challenged her in no possible way.
Those who were the brightest and best at what they do were given their chance to shine. And what better place to shine or show that you had been so esteemed and accomplished unless my mother, leader of Erudite, had labelled you worthy enough to be part of her elite team. This year Eric Coulter had been selected to go and he felt it honorable that my mother had even decided to grace him with such a privilege.
My friends consisted of people who were eager to please my mother and through extension, me. However, Eric Coulter was never like that. He never let me get away with anything. He always challenged me, refusing to let me win as easily as others had done. He was not part of my mother's team, never showed interest in what she did. He was someone that I could truly call as my own.
That was until the day my mother tested his class and he surpassed every obstacle that was presented him. In fact he outscored all her other favorites.
"What are you doing here, Eric," I smiled when he was standing outside our apartment door later on that night.
"Your mother invited me to dinner," Eric responded as he kissed my cheek.
"I am so glad," I said taking his hand and leading him in.
I was sorely mistaken in thinking that my mother had finally wished to meet the boy whom I had become very close to. I watched as he took in every word that my mother said and responded to her false promises of eternal fame. That was the day that I lost him to my mother.
"You never longed for power and glory, Eric," I screamed at him a few days later when seeing his name upon my mother's list. "Why are you doing this?"
"To protect our city from the filth that had infiltrated it," Eric responded.
"You're like a copy of one of my mother's most recent paper. You took that straight from those pages. Those are her words not yours!"
"They are my own now."
"Eric, don't do this. You're not like this! You don't need to..."
"You are wrong. I do need to do this. I am the only one who can."
"My mother tells that to people every year Eric! Every year I see her take the brightest student and send them to Dauntless. You will lose yourself there, Eric. Please do not leave Erudite! Do not leave me," I begged.
My pleas had fallen on deaf ears for the months to come. I never gave up in my requests to keep Eric here. As the months came and gone he had become strictly obedient in everything that my mother told him to do. There was pride that he was the best in his class, honor that he was chosen above the rest, reverence for the one who chose him and a deep disdain for Abnegation, divergence, and factionless alike. Gone were the days that we had shared together as innocent, puppy-love teenagers.
My heart still gave way to hope, like a silly Amity girl, that he would change his mind. Hopefully in the end I would be enough to change his mind. I would be the one who he would stay back in Erudite for. I would be the one that made him remember himself again. The months that followed his agreement to participate in my mother's plans left me unscathed. I continued my pleas for him to turn away. Even on the last day of his presence in Erudite, I still begged for him to remain.
When his blood spilled on the coals of Dauntless bowl, I still imagined that this was all a horrible nightmare. I would wake up and Eric would be back in Erudite. I continued to deny that that day had ever happened. During dinner I was insistent that my mother was lying to me, that what I saw never took place.
"Young Coulter is a very intelligent young man. He is capable of completing his task," my mother said as she sipped lightly at her soup.
I barely turned from my plate, giving her a soft humph in response. From the feeling that I got I knew my mother was lifting her eyebrow at me, trying to read my next move.
"The Divergent and factionless situation is becoming too much to handle. You know just as well as I do that there needs to be balance in this system. We need to establish a priority for the factions first. The Abnegation think too much about the factionless and I just know that my calculations are correct. Abnegation and factionless are hiding the Divergent threat, chalking it up to be some myth made by the founders of this City."
"Why are you bringing this up at the dinner table, mother?"
"I only brought it up because you seem a bit worried about Eric," she continued.
"Of course I am worried. You lead them to the slaughter sending them to Dauntless. Eric does not stand a chance," I snapped turning to her.
My mother put her spoon down and glanced over at me, a small smile tugging at her lips. "Eric has passed every test that I gave to him, Myra. Every test," she repeated. "He will succeed. He will give me Dauntless and in turn we will end all those who ruin the faction system."
"Why couldn't you have chosen someone else? Why did it have to be Eric?"
"Because he is the best and he will not fail me," my mother stated as she stood up from the table. "There will be no more discussions of him, especially from you," she added.
"Eric Coulter was mine," I yelled standing up. My mother turned to look at me with eyes cold as ice. "He was mine and you took him from me."
"Yes I did. You should know by now, daughter dearest that mother always gets what she wants. I needed Eric, the best and brightest of his age, to go to Erudite to secure the things necessary to start this. He was yours and now he belongs to the cause. Now get over it Myra. I told you that day he left our house that I had recruited him. I did my best to spare your hurt feelings by forbidding your continued friendship with him. I even offered you a replacement."
"You speak of Eric and Edward as those they were mere toys. They are people," I shouted back to her.
Mother walked forward. "They are pawns in our game. You are too young to realize that," she grabbed my forearm and pulled me to her. "I will not have you forget your place for some foolish teenage fantasy! Eric is gone Myra."
"You're wrong! Eric will come back for me! He'll come back."
"There was no love between the two of you. And forgive me for being so openly frank but his fear for me outweighs any affection he had for you," she said as the tears I had held back for months ran down my face. "You will find solace in Edward as I told you to do months ago. You will forget all about Eric Coulter. You will not attempt to distract him from his task or so help me I will abandon you without a second thought!"
Not even my mother's words could affect me in the slightest. I still believed that there was some part of him that would come back. The boy who held me, whispering lovely words was still there. He was still there somewhere. I laid my body down in bed that night knowing that this was all a horrible nightmare. The argument between me and my mother had never taken place. The agreement Eric made with her had never occurred. The relationship mother forced on me with Edward did not happen. Eric's choosing ceremony was all but a farce!
However, when I did wake the next morning and realized that he was not there anymore, that was when I was given another first from Eric. The 'first' that I thought would never come.
That day I received my first broken heart.