Crazy Happenings

Author's Note: I do not own any of the characters or places presented here, Intelligent Systems and Nintendo do.

Chapter One: The beginning of a hectic event

"Here, Huey. Eat this." A soft-spoken feminine voice spoke.

Florina smiled as she stroked her loving Pegasus Huey. To her, Huey was and forever will be her best friend even though they were of different races. They had always been together in battle, fighting with all their might to save the entire continent of Elibe from falling into utter chaos and into the hands of an evil man called Nergal. As she remembered those days, she couldn't help but smile as she recalled the time when she was promoted to a Falcoknight. The joy she felt when she was handed an Elysian Whip was one of her happy memories during that time. Of course, her happiest moment was when they, the Eliwood's Elite had finally succeeded to stop Nergal's evil wrongdoings. She remembered the sunshine that lightened up the whole continent, even the lonely Dread Isle. All of a sudden flowers started to bloom out of nowhere, birds were chirping happily…

That was just three months ago. After the final battle, everyone went their own ways. Eliwood and Hector accepted their rightful places and led Pherae and Ositia as its marquess (though Hector did once or twice invite her to join him in Ositia). She blushed at that thought. "No, no, let's not think of that…" Lyndis, her good friend, had returned to the plains after saying goodbyes to her, promising to visit her once more. Since Lyn had abdicated Castle Caelin's rule to Ositia, Kent had resigned as a Caelin knight and joined Fiora, wanting to be with the person that he loved. The other green knight, Sain the flirtatious one had too resigned and chose to follow Kent, as they were good comrades despite the differences in their behavior. Her two sisters, Fiora and Farina had returned to their homeland together with Florina herself as they wished to return to their beloved homeland. Ninian, a half dragon-girl who played an important role in the battle against Nergal and also her good friend, had followed them to Ilia for the same purpose though only for a short while. Even though Ninian was supposed to stay at the Dragon's Gate with her brother Nils, her love for Eliwood made her choose to stay in the human world regardless her knowing that she would not stay alive for long.

Though everyone had gone their own ways, Hector had invited everyone to a welcoming-party (or so he called it) in Castle Ositia itself a week ago including Mark, their tactician who had helped them tremendously during their fight against evil. Not everyone had turned up, since some people like Mark, Geitz and Dart were nowhere to be found therefore communication was impossible. They were all pleased and happy to see each other. The 'welcoming-party' itself was already over as it was held yesterday. "Hmmm…I guess I should have left yesterday after the party…but…he…" But a certain person stopped her from doing so, saying that there was some things that he needed her help with. As this thought passed her mind, a blush crept up her cheeks…

"HELP ME!"

An extremely loud shriek-like cry rang through her ears and snapped the timid girl back to reality. She turned back and her face was of utter astonishment as she saw her-, no, their leader as they battled against Nergal, Eliwood running towards her with a desparate look on his face. She was so taken in by the look of horror on his face and his weird actions that she almost did not notice three women following behind him, trying to chase after the redhead. She finally did notice though, and that was when their screams rang through the air, as though it was piercing it.

"Lord Eliwood, wait for me!"

"Don't run away from me Eliwood! You're mine!"

"Who said he was yours? He DOESN'T belong to you at all!"

"Yeah, he belongs to me!"

"Shut up, both of you! Eliwood's mine and I'll prove it! If only he would stop running away…"

"Yeah, he's probably running away because of you two! It's both of your fault!"

"Oh yeah, and what makes you think that he's not scared of YOU, huh!"

"Yeah! He's scared of you two, that's why he's running away! Ahh, if only I had that assassin skill 'Burst of Speed' in Diablo II Expansion, Eliwood would be mine now! My legs are really getting tired…"

…And such was what Florina could hear. In fact, she could barely hear them as she was astounded that they could speak-no, scream and quarrel at the top of their voices and run furiously at the same time. She recognized the three women whom were Ninian, Lyn and finally, her own sister, Fiora! She was surprised that her sister would behave like that as she was very dignified in her ways. "I guess even Fiora can't behave so stiff everyday…hmm…I wonder if the same goes to Kent." If she had taken a look at Huey, she would have noticed a comical look on his face.

Eliwood had better stamina and energy than the three women obviously as he ran towards Florina, still screaming for help like a crazy, helpless little boy, not like the Eliwood that she knew three months ago. The fact that he was acting childishly shocked her. As he reached her, he stopped and started panting like mad. "Help me, help me, help me, help me… I'm all exhausted, all my muscles are tired and all my energy's drained and yet those three girls can still run after me like mad…crazy! Waaaaahhhh, mommy, where are you!" And before Florina knew it, the so-called 'cool and calm leader' was crying and whinnying like a small silly boy. All she could do was stare and stare at him speechless.

As Florina absolutely did not know what to say to this 'pansy-boy', she looked behind and was surprised to find that the three women had stopped chasing after Eliwood. Apparently, each of them decided to just get rid of the other girls. So there they were, each of them having scary death glares with their trusted weapons at their side and a very bright red death aura around them. Lyn with her Sol Katti and a Killer Bow, Fiora with her legendary Rex Hasta and Ninian with her rings (though Florina didn't know how Ninian was going to fight since she is not a fighting type of dancer unlike the dancers in Final Fantasy Tactics). "Uh oh, this is really going to be scary…why is everyone acting weird today all of a sudden?"

"Hmph, prepare yourselves for this! I'll dispose of you two quickly then Eliwood is mine! Hahahaha!" Lyn's voice could be heard clearly as she readied her Sol Katti.

Hearing Lyn's statement, Fiora countered, taunting Lyndis even more, "I'll say the same to you too. Don't get too cocky just because you have the Sol Katti. Don't you remember the weapon triangle? Lances always win against swords and I bet your flimsy sword won't stand a chance against my Rex Hasta! Mwahahahahahahahaha!"

"Who just said about not getting cocky? YOU're the one getting a swelled head now! Anyway, you forgot that I have a Killer Bow ready by my side! Or have you, 'O Smart One', forgotten that bows gain a great advantage against flying units? You wouldn't stand a chance against me!"

"Well let's see how much damage you can do to me with my Delphi Shield equipped here! Try me!"

"Fine then! Just don't complain and whine later to me about your ass getting kicked!" Lyndis was really trembling with rage, her fingers twitching like mad. After some moments (well actually waiting for a leaf to drop to the ground – just like in Angelic Layer where Suzuka and Shirahime finally moved after a dramatic scene when a leaf dropped ;), Lyndis finally engaged into a fearsome battle with Fiora. Though to Florina, they were just sorta playing or rather fighting like a pair of lousy fighters….

And where is Ninian, do you ask? Well, in the midst of all this, smart and cunning little Ninian had the sense not to get involved in the battle, so she had hid somewhere else during the time where Fiora and Lyndis had exchanged words and crept out when they starting fighting. She then ran for her life towards her dear Eliwood. "Eliwood-sama!"

Eliwood looked back feeling scared and saw Ninian running like crazy towards him from afar with an ecstasy look on her face, her arms wide open. He screamed like a girl (sweatdrop) and tried to hide behind Florina.

"Eeeek!"

"Uh, sorry…but I…I'm really scared! You would be too if you had known how crazy this girls are…" Eliwood stammered.

Flashback

Eliwood and Hector had just come out of the castle after a long and boring discussion about being marquesses. The 'discussion' really lasted very long, like nearly …3 hours? and the two 'kids' (yeah kids) were really tired and wanted to stretch their bodies, so they decided to take a walk around the castle. Being a huge-sized man, Hector accidentally hit Eliwood on the back as he stretched out his arm clumsily.

"Owwww!"

"Oh, sorry Eliwood. Didn't really mean it, ya know…so it's…"

"OWWWW!" Eliwood interrupted Hector as he let out a cry and tears started pouring down his cheeks. The reason: because Hector hit him again (though if it was accidental or not, I also don't know). "Damn, Hector! What are you doing!"

"Uh, I didn't purposely do it! I'm really so sorry Eliwood. There there, don't cry anymore…" Hector tried to console him by patting him on the back like what a mother does to a little child.

"Uh oh, don't Hector! NO, it's okay, I…" Eliwood hurriedly tried to stop Hector from patting him as his 'pat' really means a hit and that's because he's really too strong but…

"Owww! It hurts!" …Guess Eliwood was too late. Hector continued patting him with a 'aww, don't cry baby' look on his broad face. He didn't realise his own tremendous strength. Only did he stop 'patting' Eliwood when he saw that Eliwood vomited onto the castle grounds. Ewww…Hector's eyes widened really big when he saw THAT on HIS castle grounds. "Oh gosh! What have you done, Eliwood?"

"Urk…it's your fault…urk…you hit me too hard…ulp…" Eliwood stammered.

Hector frowned when he saw the mess. "Ewww…gross..." His attention was quickly diverted when he saw three girls running quickly towards Eliwood and Hector from different directions. He recognized them as the dragon-girl, the swordswoman and Florina's sister. They came up to them and before the two men could say anything, the three girls spoke.

"Eliwood, there's something I want to tell you. Come with me."

"Lord Eliwood, may I be granted to speak with you?"

"Eliwood, I wish to have a talk with you."

Looking up, Eliwood was dazed to find three women wanting to see him all at once. "What do they want to talk about with me? Seems like it's pretty urgent…I wonder if the matter they wish to discuss are the same…" he thought in his mind.

As if reading his mind, the three girls suddenly eyed each other suspiciously. Suddenly, the same thought dawned onto their minds. "The other girls are also wanting to confess their love to Eliwood!"

And as if on cue, all the three girls suddenly shouted, "Eliwood's mine!"

"Huh? What on earth are you three talking about?" Being a dense guy, Eliwood obviously didn't catch their meaning despite the simple sentences uttered out.

Hector just grinned. "Never knew you were so dense, Eliwood…sigh I'll tell you. Those girls love you. Catch the meaning?"

Eliwood's eyes widened in shock. "Really? You mean, these girls? All THREE of them?"

"Yup." Hector's grin was still planted on his face. (seems that he totally forgot about the mess that Eliwood made…)

The girls couldn't believe their ears and eyes. Upon recovery, Lyndis hurriedly said, "He's mine! I asked him first!"

"Yeah, so what? Even though you asked first, it didn't mean that you would be the first one to confess!"

"That's right! Lord Eliwood's mine!"

"No way! I won't let it happen! ABSOLUTELY not!" Fiora stated indignantly and stuck her tongue out to Ninian and Lyndis.

"Umm…Eliwood?" Hector asked quietly in the midst of the argument between the three girls.

"…Yeah?"

"I think you should do something about this. I mean, you're the 'leader', right?"

"NO! Being the leader doesn't mean I solve love problems! I…I don't have the right to do so…Arrgh! Fine! I'll admit it. I'm clueless on how to solve this. There, are you satisfied now?"

"…Um, you know, I didn't even ask you to admit that."

"…Oh, really?"

"Yeah."

"………Oops."

Hector let out a big sigh. Addressing to the three girls, he said, "Excuse me girls, but I don't really like to have a silly love argument here in my castle grounds okay…so if you please, would you all…"

"SHUT UP HECTOR! THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU, SO STAY OUT OF IT!"

If Hector had not been wearing big, heavy armor, he would have been blown away by now. As for pansy-boy Eliwood, he was straightaway blown away to the green plains nearby. Seizing the chance, Eliwood decided to make a run for it so that he wouldn't need to face the girls. He was really… scared and nervous. He was no longer 'as cool as cucumber'.

The three girls, upon noticing his disappearance, quickly looked around and saw their 'precious Eliwood' escaping from their sight and hurriedly chased after him.

"ELIWOOD! WAIT!"

End flashback

Eliwood shuddered when he recalled the events that happened. He was so absorbed in his memories that he failed to notice Huey beside him. Knowing that Florina did not like Eliwood hiding behind her, he gave the scared boy a kick that sent him to some prickly bushes.

"Aaaaaahhhhh!"

"Huey! Bad boy…you shouldn't have done that…" Florina felt abashed and nervous. Would Eliwood scold her? In response, Huey just gave a Pegasus grin to her. (I wonder how does it look like…) Anyway, Florina was worried about Eliwood, so she went to check on him and found him chibi-size, crying loudly. "MOMMY! sob sob where are you…sob"

"Um…I'm sorry…for what Huey did…Are you…okay? …Eeeek!"

Ninian, who had finally caught up with her 'beloved Eliwood', pushed Florina aside roughly. "Don't stand in my way! Lord Eliwood!"

Meanwhile…

What about Fiora and Lyndis? Well, they were still fighting like kids. In the middle of pinching Fiora's cheeks and sticking her tongue out, she suddenly realised Ninian's disappearance. "Hey, dumb peg knight, where's that little brat of a dragon-girl?"

"STOP PINCHING ME! And I'm a FALCOKNIGHT! And I'm not dumb! And…"

"Ah, whatever. Just answer my question."

"Huh? What was it again?"

"AHH! I just asked where was that dragon-girl brat!"

"You mean that cunning little brat Nini?"

"Yeah, of course! WHO else is a dragon-girl? DUMB!"

(Ignoring Lyndis' insult) "Hmmm…yeah, you're right. Where IS she? …Oh no, don't tell me she…"

"AHHH! Help me!" The two girls immediately recognised that voice as Eliwood's and looked in front of them. They were shocked to find Eliwood struggling to release himself from Ninian's clutches. They were really angry. So angry that you could almost see a spire of smoke coming out from their ears…

"That cunning lil' brat! She's taking the chance to cow over him now that we're fighting! That little…"

"Anyway, we've got to hurry fast to stop her! Let's go!"

"Hey, who said I was teaming up with you?"

"Ah, who cares? For now, we have the same objective, so let's just forget about the fight okay!"

The two flaming girls rushed up to Eliwood quickly and soon a scared Florina could no longer see Eliwood…

"Um…Huey, don't you think that I should go away from these scary people?"

"NOOO! Florina, don't go! HELP ME! I'm in deep trouble! AHHHH!" Eliwood screamed.

"Uh…yeah, I think I should go…so, um… "What should I say?""…Good luck, Lord Eliwood…I think I'll…excuse myself." "I guess that's all I can say in this situation right now…I don't know what to do anyway…" The shy violet-haired girl then took leave and flew away on her trusted Pegasus.

"NOOO! Wait…wait! AHHHHH! MOMMYYYYY!"

Eliwood's cries could be heard from afar….

A/N: Whew! Finally done with the first chapter. I don't really know whether this chapter is humorous enough or just plain crappy, but I'll try my best to update soon. Anyway, this is my first fic, so comments on my writing are needed and greatly appreciated.