Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia.

WELL, new story is up! This is super short, but meh. I'm being lazy. And again, I apologize for any OOC-ness.

Inspired by those sexy pictures of Spain in bunny ears on zerochan.

Told from Romano/Lovino's point of view. They're all nations in this by the way.

Today was pretty normal. I worked, got pissed at someone slacking off, then went to the bar. I've gone so many times already, you could even say I'm a regular there. No, screw that, I should be like, a platinum member. Seriously, you have no idea how many times I've gone already. It's starting to get ridiculous. Even some of the guys I see there frequently have been telling me I should cut back on the drinking. Something about damaging my body. I could snort at their ignorance. I'm a fucking country, drinking won't do anything to my body. Of course, they didn't know that, and I could care less about informing them of the fact. I didn't want them getting the wrong idea after all; they were just people I didn't mind having around me. And I definitely didn't need some assholes trying to get me to go out with them. I guess some of them were nice - mostly the girls - but most of them were just bastards looking for a good fuck. Sometimes I'd oblige, since there were times when I needed to get my mind off things. But most of the time, I'd just ignore their advances. It'd probably get worse if I told them I was a country. Men are greedy, you know. They'd probably be tempted to fuck me just to try to dominate Southern Italy. No shit, it wouldn't work. It doesn't work like that with humans. It might work if it was another country, but that's unrelated. It's not like that would ever happen to me. I'm not going to fall in love with a nation; I would never allow myself to. Actually, falling in love with a human would be pretty bad too. They'd grow old and die after a few dozen years. I don't think I could deal with that. Huh. Maybe I'll just stay alone forever. Feliciano's enough for me, even if he's annoying sometimes.

I lay down on my bed and pulled up the covers. I'll never find love. I don't need it anyways, so it doesn't matter. It's not like I'm lonely or anything. I've always got my brother if I really wanted someone to talk to.

xXXx

I walked into the bar at about seven in the evening. As usual, I took my spot in the corner, since I didn't want anyone coming to annoy me. But obviously, it didn't always work. As soon as I sat down, that stupid blonde dude who calls himself the hero came up to me.

"Hey! Wanna come over tonight? I just got this awesome movie, but it's kinda scary, so I don't really wanna watch it alone! Watch it with me!" I groaned at his irritatingly loud voice.

"No, I don't want to watch your fucking movies. I don't even get how you think those things are scary. The things you rate R in your country are PG in mine." Ya, it was America. Why was he there? How the fuck am I supposed to know? You go ask him how and why he was in the Netherlands.

"C'mon dude, you're no fun!" he grinned at me, tapping my shoulder. God, he was annoying. I pushed his hand away, sending him a glare.

"Stop annoying me. Shouldn't you be working? Your country's still in a fucking recession, isn't it?"

"Huh? Oh, ya, it is. But I can't really help with that, ya know? I tried, but they wouldn't give me the money to build a giant hero! So I just left it up to the boss and his buds! Hahahaha!" ...I really couldn't take his annoyingly loud voice anymore. Was he one of the bastards I was talking about? Oh yes. Was he one of the ones trying to get into my pants? No fucking way, he's already got his eyes on that guy with caterpillars for eyebrows. Not that I care about that. In fact, I was glad he had someone else to bug instead of me. Unfortunately, with Arthur busy with his country at the moment - like he should be, seriously, what the fuck was he doing here? - poor little America was left alone.

With no one to bother. But me.

...Great.

"Ya, ya, whatever. I could care less about all of that." I snorted in return, looking up as a waiter arrived. Finally, about time. "Give me some wine. The stuff from Italy." He nodded, returning to the counter to place my order. But not fast enough, apparently, since that stupid blonde had enough time to give him - more like shout at him- his order.

"And some beer too!" The waiter nodded in acknowledgment before turning around. I let out an irritated sigh.

"I'm not paying for your drinks. And why the fuck did you get beer, anyways? It's German." I grumbled, crossing my arms.

"Whaaaat? Come on bud, be a pal! I'm in a recession, remember?" he slung his arm around my shoulder, pulling me way too close for comfort.

"Ya, so go do something about it instead of spending more money." I retorted after elbowing his ribs. Bastard, didn't even budge.

"Hahahaha! I see you know nothing about how to get out of a recession, Romano! See, to get your economy back up and workin', you gotta spend more money! Ya, I know, it sounds crazy, right? But that's how it works!" And then he started laughing again.

"Go do it then, instead of bothering me!" I snapped back immediately, my impatience rising to an all time high. Ya, I know about economics. I'm not an idiot who doesn't even know about the state of their own country.

"I'll do it later! As they say, better never than late, right? Wait, that doesn't sound right..."

"...It's 'better late than never', you idiot." America pretended to be shocked.

"Romano, I'm not an idiot! After all, if I was, where would that leave you? Hahahaha!" My eye twitched. I was about to give him a piece of my mind when our waiter came back with our drinks. Wait, that wasn't the waiter we had before...

"Hello!~ Here's your beer and wine~" Oh my god, he was fucking hot. It wasn't even fair how hot he was. I mean, I'm pretty handsome too. And I'm pretty toned as well. But I feel like nothing compared to this guy.

"Oh, thanks dude!" America grinned, oblivious to my gaping mouth. Wait, when had I opened it anyways? I quickly snapped it shut, trying to stop myself from drooling over the sexy waiter.

"Y-Ya, uh thanks." I stuttered, ignoring the weird look I received from America. I watched as he left, my eyes trailing to his ass. Oh yes, that wonderfully sculpted ass with that fabric barely covering t - Wait, what the fuck am I doing, staring at his ass like some pervert?! I'm not a pervert! I-It just wasn't fair! All he was wearing was a pair of bunny ears, a mask - why was he wearing that? Don't hide your fucking probably attractive face - and a shirt tied around his waist! It was only barely concealing his vital regions! H-How am I supposed to not stare?!

"Uh, Romano? You're drooling on the table." The fucking american had to point out. I quickly wiped my mouth, sending him a glare. "Were you staring at that waiter? Can't blame ya though, I mean, if I wasn't after Arthur already, I'd totally tap that." he nodded to himself, staring critically at Mr. Bunny Ears's fucking hot ass.

"I-I wasn't staring, dammit! I was just thinking that he should wear more clothes!" I stammered, refusing to admit that he was right on the dot.

"Riigghttt...listen to this! That guy just started today! I think his name's Antonio or something!" My jaw dropped. A-Antonio?! Wasn't that that bastard Spain's human name? Well it didn't mean they were the same person, but still...He did look ridiculously familiar...

"I don't care about his name!" I snapped back after regaining my composure. If you call blushing composed.

"Ohh, how dirty Romano! You just want to fuck him? Well he'd probably end up fucking you. Hahahaha!" If that idiot didn't shut up soon, I swear his face would end up on the table. Covered in blood. Oh yes, that sounded nice.

"Whoa, dude, you didn't hit me. Are you seriously thinking of th-" And that's when he got a punch to the face, knocking him off his chair. I snorted.

"No, I was debating how to stage your death." I retorted before standing up. Leaving the now bloody-faced American on the ground, I walked up to the counter, looking around. "Hey, where's that waiter with the bunny ears?" I asked the bartender, impatience obvious in my voice.

"Oh, he's in the back, I believe." I nodded, glancing at the door. As soon as I stepped towards it, said waiter walked out with some drinks in his hand. I gulped as I looked at him. He had this stupid yet charming smile, like he was spreading bubbling with happiness. I'm not even kidding, I could literally see this fluffy pink background behind him, despite his choice of attire.

"Uh, hey." I said awkwardly, trying to catch his attention. My God, couldn't he wear something a little more decent? Not that I minded that much, honestly...

"Hm? Ah, hello!~ Can I help you?" he smiled at me, turning to face me.

"Ya, uh...I heard your name was Antonio from a...stranger." I nodded, trying not to blush too hard. Useless thoughts, of course.

He nodded, his smile widening, if that was even possible. "Si! That is my name~" I nodded again.

"Well, Antonio..." I stepped slightly closer to him, giving him a seductive look. I'm pretty smooth with others, if I do say so myself. "Want to come over?" I stood on the tips of my toes to whisper into his ear, smirking when I felt him shiver. But what came next, I wasn't expecting.

He put his hand on my ass. Oh my god, he just fucking squeezed it. I couldn't help myself from leaning against him as a soft moan escaped from my mouth.

"Are you up to it?" I barely heard the whisper, my brain focusing on that strong, yet gentle hand. Not trusting my voice, I simply nodded.

W-What? He was handsome as fuck! And I didn't care, dammit! Well being on top would be nice, but I was fairly sure that with a body like his, he'd do a fucking good job on top. So what if I was on the bottom for once? It's not like it happened often! ...Okay, maybe it did. So what? It's not like I'd get pregnant or some shit like that!

I was so busy arguing with myself that I didn't notice he'd picked me up. "H-Hold on, where are we going?" I stuttered, surprised by the sudden movement. But he didn't say anything. Instead, he turned around and walked back into the door he'd come out of. "Wait, I can't go in there! I don't work here!" I protested, though not very convincingly. I felt a twinge of annoyance when he chuckled. Was he laughing at me? Dammit, I'd show him I wasn't only handsome!

"It's okay, no one really cares~ By the way, what's your name?" He smiled that perfect smile, not helping the blush on my cheeks at all. I swear, if I blushed any harder, I'd look like a tomato.

"L-Lovino..." I stammered, so distracted by his smile I accidentally let my human name slip. Shit, I only gave that name to the nations and people who were actually close to me... Not that there were many of them.

"Ah, Lovi? That's a nice name~It sounds like the name of someone else I know..." he laughed, making my eye twitch. Lovi? What the fuck was that?

"What's a Lovi?" I snorted, only noticing just now that I'd been dropped on a bed. Wait, there was a bed in the back of a bar? Well, guess you learn something new every day. Not that I'd ever be needing that information in my life.

"It's your nickname, silly~" he leaned in, licking my neck. Damn, he was good. Why did he seem like such an idiot at the same time though?

"N-Nickname? I don't need a fucking nickname like that..." I grumbled, barely noticing the hands swiftly taking off my clothes.

"Oh, that's okay~ But I'll need a name to call you, and I think that's cute~" he laughed again, happiness bubbling from him. Literally.

"I'd rather you didn't call me anything..." I shivered at the feeling of his fingers against my skin.

"Ah, but staying quiet during sex is boring, Lovi!~" He exclaimed. And that was the last thing I remember him saying before my pants came off.

Aren't I such a tease, ending it right there? Don't worry, this isn't the end. If there are people who want me to continue, I will. So fav+review, da? :3