Do you ever feel like you are driving straight into a storm? And even though you know you should just turn round and go home and curl up in your bed under your pile of blankets you just keep driving?

That's what I'm doing now, driving right into a storm. The sun is shining annoyingly bright as I drive into this emotional storm know as my former life.

A drive across the country with my car packed with clothes and a tiny little memory box filled with pictures and a tiny little hospital hat. The only thing I have besides pictures of Amelia.

Amelia.

My reason for running and my reason for going back.

When I was 17, almost 18, I got pregnant. Oh I thought he was the love of my life and while the situation sucked we would get through it. He had other ideas, ideas that did not include a baby or me for that matter. I was heartbroken and I decided to give the baby up for adoption but my mom couldn't bear the thought of her grandbaby out there with strangers. I couldn't think of the baby without thinking of my broken heart so in a moment of complete selfishness, I took off for bigger and better things leaving my 3 week old baby in the care of my parents. I haven't seen her since. Bigger and better turned into barely making ends meet and a string of relationships but no matter how bad things got I never went home. Mom sent me pictures regularly and I talk to her weekly on the phone. She thinks I'm like an aunt I guess. Someone who calls her tells her they love her and sends her letters. She's beautiful, Amelia.

I left my 3 week ago baby 3 years ago. 1 week ago I got a call from my old best friend Jacob, someone else I have completely neglected in the past 3 years, saying my mom and dad are dead.

Just like that my already crappy life shatters. I ran out on them and now it's too late.

So I'm driving into this storm to take care of funeral arrangements for my parents and figure out how to start my life over with Amelia.

My family is small; Mom and Dad were both only children and I'm an only child. All my grandparents are dead. Amelia is staying with Jake and his dad right now. I don't know the first thing about raising a kid. I can barely take care of myself!

I will have to stay there since I don't have the money to make it back, I barely made it here plus I can't exactly take a little girl back to where I was, a 3 bedroom apartment with 5 people living there and who knows how many others running in and out. Luckily my parents paid their house off years ago. I just have to find a job which can be easy or hard in a small town depending on whether or not people like you. Since I ran away from my parents and my baby and everyone I had known since I was born I'm thinking it's not going to be easy.

My biggest fear is ruining her though. I know my parents took awesome care of her. She was happy every time I talked to her and in every picture I got of her. And now all she has is me her deadbeat mother who didn't love her enough to stay. I don't really know anything about her. And while I realize that right now she is just a little girl who probably loves everyone and she has no idea who I am or what I did to her one day she will understand. And she will probably hate me.

Which is exactly what I deserve.

A/N OK I have no idea where this story is going but I will not give up on it. I haven't given up on Runaway if you read that but I'm really stuck on it.

Questions… who should be Bella's love interest in this story? I will consider anyone except for Edward just because I always think of them being really good friends more than lovers. And who should Amelia's father be should I decide to make him apart the story?

Thanks for reading, please review even if you hate it and a special thanks to anyone who gives opinions to the questions!