When Choco/Mog Goes Mad...
By: Deekz
Rated PG-13 for language.
Disclaimer: No, I do not own Squaresoft or anything like that. Don't sue me. I was just bored when I wrote this. Everything came out of the top of my head.
"Sephiroth, you'll pay for all of the things you did!" Cloud yelled as he felt his anger rise higher and higher.
"Wait!" Sephiroth yelped. "I don't wanna die!"
"But I want you to!" Cloud yelled. "You killed Aeris and all of those other people!"
"Jenova made me do it!" Sephiroth yelped.
"I don't care, just die!" Cloud said. "The game says you die, so die!"
"No!" Sephiroth whimpered. "I'm too young to die!"
"Stop complaining and DIE ALREADY!" Cloud yelled. But, suddenly, his anger began to go down. "NO! THIS ISN'T SUPPOSE TO HAPPEN IN THE GAME!"
"Hah!" Sephiroth laughed. "The game pities me!"
"Noooo!" Cloud cried. "Aeris! I failed you! And you were so good in bed!"
"…" Sephiroth stared at Cloud, awestruck.
"…I DID NOT SAY A WORD!" Cloud yelled. "Not one thing!"
"Oh well," Sephiroth said. "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I AM THE SUPREME EVIL!"
"But you said Jenova made you evil," Cloud said.
"But I was lying, you see!" Sephiroth laughed. "The foolish game actually believed me and pitied me! Hahahahaha! You see how good I am, puppet?!"
"NOOO!" Cloud said. "Why, game, why?!" Cloud fell to his knees and began to cry.
"WARK!
"What?!" Sephiroth looked around. "A chocobo & and a mog want to challenge me?!"
Cloud looked up. "Choco/Mog! You've come to save me! I love you!"
"…wark…" the chocobo answered angrily.
"Shut up, Spikes!" the mog yelled.
Cloud leaped at the chocobo and hugged its leg. "Hey, are you good in bed?"
"WARKK!" the chocobo retorted angrily, prying Cloud's hands off its legs. It began stomping on his head.
"OW!" Cloud screeched.
"Pervert!" the mog yelled.
"You're supposed to listen to me, you stupid summon!" Cloud yelled.
"Yes, listen to the fool, I'm allergic to chocobos!" Sephiroth sniffed." Achoo!"
"Shut up, you!" The mog yelled, digging his heels into the chocobo's sides.
"WARK!" the chocobo leaped to a start, giving Cloud a final stomp on the head. It crashed into Sephiroth, blowing him into the Meteor.
"WAHHHHHHH!" Sephiroth screamed. "NOOOO! I'M GOING TO DESTROY THE METEOR! MY MASTERPIECEEEEEEEEEEE! AND I HAVE GAS, TOO!!" Sephiroth slammed into the Meteor. There was a huge explosion and the Meteor was gone.
"You did it, Choco/Mog!" Cloud said, hugging the mog instead. "Are you good in bed?"
"PERVERT!" mog bit Cloud's finger and tugged at it hard.
"YOW!" Cloud jumped back. "C'mon, baby!"
"Cloud…"
"Shit."
"CLOUD…"
"SHIT."
"CLOUDDD…!"
"SHITTTTT…!"
"CLOUDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!"
"SHITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!"
"YOU'RE GONNA DIE!" Tifa jumped out of nowhere, her limit break building. "Get back here, Cloud!"
"WARK!" the chocobo pecked Tifa in the head.
"OW!" Tifa jumped back. "What was that for?"
"It saved the world, I swear it!" Cloud said.
"Shut up, you!" Tifa launched a punch at his face. "You saved the world?"
"WARK!" Choco/Mog pecked Tifa in the eye.
"OW! YOU BASTARD!" Tifa said. She prepared to kick the chocobo, but it flew away.
"Chocobos can fly?" Cloud asked.
"Don't ask me," Tifa said. "Ask the author."
A mysterious voice in the air says, I'm the one who makes the stories, and I'm the one who makes chocobos fly! Well, actually they can fly in Final Fantasy IX…at least the golden ones.
"F…F…9?!" Tifa & Cloud growled.
Don't worry. I didn't say anything. You can't hit me anyway. HAH!
"DAMMIT!!" Cloud yelled.
"She's a traitor!" Tifa said. "You're a traitor, too!"
"Me?!"
"You cheated on me!" Tifa yelled, tears building in her eyes. "Die!" She unleashed her whole string of limit breaks on Cloud.
"Ow," Cloud fell to the ground.
"Humph!" Tifa folded her arms and glared at Cloud. "That'll teach you!"
"Uh, I think the crater is gonna f***ing explode on our asses if we don't haul them outta here!" Cid said, appearing out of nowhere.
"YAHHH!" Cloud jumped to his feet and rushed off.
"Wait…I like beating on you, Cloud! Get back here!" Tifa yelled, chasing after him.
"What the f*** is going on with them?" Cid shrugged and rushed off after them.
Author's Notes: ...is this funny or stupid or...stupid? I can't really write humor fics that well. Were you laughing your bottom off reading this? I dunno. Do you want me to continue this? This is what reviews are for. Review, you insolent fool! And I'm working on A Night With Rufus & The Turks, but I just don't have time to write! Ack!
By: Deekz
Rated PG-13 for language.
Disclaimer: No, I do not own Squaresoft or anything like that. Don't sue me. I was just bored when I wrote this. Everything came out of the top of my head.
"Sephiroth, you'll pay for all of the things you did!" Cloud yelled as he felt his anger rise higher and higher.
"Wait!" Sephiroth yelped. "I don't wanna die!"
"But I want you to!" Cloud yelled. "You killed Aeris and all of those other people!"
"Jenova made me do it!" Sephiroth yelped.
"I don't care, just die!" Cloud said. "The game says you die, so die!"
"No!" Sephiroth whimpered. "I'm too young to die!"
"Stop complaining and DIE ALREADY!" Cloud yelled. But, suddenly, his anger began to go down. "NO! THIS ISN'T SUPPOSE TO HAPPEN IN THE GAME!"
"Hah!" Sephiroth laughed. "The game pities me!"
"Noooo!" Cloud cried. "Aeris! I failed you! And you were so good in bed!"
"…" Sephiroth stared at Cloud, awestruck.
"…I DID NOT SAY A WORD!" Cloud yelled. "Not one thing!"
"Oh well," Sephiroth said. "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I AM THE SUPREME EVIL!"
"But you said Jenova made you evil," Cloud said.
"But I was lying, you see!" Sephiroth laughed. "The foolish game actually believed me and pitied me! Hahahahaha! You see how good I am, puppet?!"
"NOOO!" Cloud said. "Why, game, why?!" Cloud fell to his knees and began to cry.
"WARK!
"What?!" Sephiroth looked around. "A chocobo & and a mog want to challenge me?!"
Cloud looked up. "Choco/Mog! You've come to save me! I love you!"
"…wark…" the chocobo answered angrily.
"Shut up, Spikes!" the mog yelled.
Cloud leaped at the chocobo and hugged its leg. "Hey, are you good in bed?"
"WARKK!" the chocobo retorted angrily, prying Cloud's hands off its legs. It began stomping on his head.
"OW!" Cloud screeched.
"Pervert!" the mog yelled.
"You're supposed to listen to me, you stupid summon!" Cloud yelled.
"Yes, listen to the fool, I'm allergic to chocobos!" Sephiroth sniffed." Achoo!"
"Shut up, you!" The mog yelled, digging his heels into the chocobo's sides.
"WARK!" the chocobo leaped to a start, giving Cloud a final stomp on the head. It crashed into Sephiroth, blowing him into the Meteor.
"WAHHHHHHH!" Sephiroth screamed. "NOOOO! I'M GOING TO DESTROY THE METEOR! MY MASTERPIECEEEEEEEEEEE! AND I HAVE GAS, TOO!!" Sephiroth slammed into the Meteor. There was a huge explosion and the Meteor was gone.
"You did it, Choco/Mog!" Cloud said, hugging the mog instead. "Are you good in bed?"
"PERVERT!" mog bit Cloud's finger and tugged at it hard.
"YOW!" Cloud jumped back. "C'mon, baby!"
"Cloud…"
"Shit."
"CLOUD…"
"SHIT."
"CLOUDDD…!"
"SHITTTTT…!"
"CLOUDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!"
"SHITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!"
"YOU'RE GONNA DIE!" Tifa jumped out of nowhere, her limit break building. "Get back here, Cloud!"
"WARK!" the chocobo pecked Tifa in the head.
"OW!" Tifa jumped back. "What was that for?"
"It saved the world, I swear it!" Cloud said.
"Shut up, you!" Tifa launched a punch at his face. "You saved the world?"
"WARK!" Choco/Mog pecked Tifa in the eye.
"OW! YOU BASTARD!" Tifa said. She prepared to kick the chocobo, but it flew away.
"Chocobos can fly?" Cloud asked.
"Don't ask me," Tifa said. "Ask the author."
A mysterious voice in the air says, I'm the one who makes the stories, and I'm the one who makes chocobos fly! Well, actually they can fly in Final Fantasy IX…at least the golden ones.
"F…F…9?!" Tifa & Cloud growled.
Don't worry. I didn't say anything. You can't hit me anyway. HAH!
"DAMMIT!!" Cloud yelled.
"She's a traitor!" Tifa said. "You're a traitor, too!"
"Me?!"
"You cheated on me!" Tifa yelled, tears building in her eyes. "Die!" She unleashed her whole string of limit breaks on Cloud.
"Ow," Cloud fell to the ground.
"Humph!" Tifa folded her arms and glared at Cloud. "That'll teach you!"
"Uh, I think the crater is gonna f***ing explode on our asses if we don't haul them outta here!" Cid said, appearing out of nowhere.
"YAHHH!" Cloud jumped to his feet and rushed off.
"Wait…I like beating on you, Cloud! Get back here!" Tifa yelled, chasing after him.
"What the f*** is going on with them?" Cid shrugged and rushed off after them.
Author's Notes: ...is this funny or stupid or...stupid? I can't really write humor fics that well. Were you laughing your bottom off reading this? I dunno. Do you want me to continue this? This is what reviews are for. Review, you insolent fool! And I'm working on A Night With Rufus & The Turks, but I just don't have time to write! Ack!