The Relationship Revelation
By Draic Kin of the Balance
"My head is haunting me and my heart feels like a ghost
I need to feel something, 'cause I'm still so far from home
Cross your heart and hope to die
Promise me you'll never leave my side
Show me what I can't see when the spark in your eyes is gone
You've got me on my knees, I'm your one then come
Cross my heart and hope to die
Promise you I'll never leave your side
'Cause I'm telling you you're all I need
I promise you you're all I see
'Cause I'm telling you you're all I need
I'll never leave
So you can drag me through Hell
If it meant I could hold your hand
I will follow you 'cause I'm under your spell
And you can throw me to the flames
I will follow you, I will follow you
Come sink into me and let me breathe you in
I'll be your gravity, you be my oxygen
So dig two graves 'cause when you die
I swear I'll be leaving by your side
So you can drag me through Hell
If it meant I could hold your hand
I will follow you 'cause I'm under your spell
And you can throw me to the flames
I will follow you, so you can drag me through Hell
If it meant I could hold your hand
I will follow you 'cause I'm under your spell
And you can throw me to the flames
I will follow you, I will follow you
I will follow you, I will follow you
So you can drag me through Hell
If it meant I could hold your hand
I will follow you 'cause I'm under your spell
And you can throw me to the flames
I will follow you, I will follow you." –Bring Me the Horizon, Follow You
The car was quiet. Too quiet for Leonard's comfort. This is romantic, he thought dryly to himself. Potentially ruining your marriage before you even start it. He looked over towards Penny; she was staring out the window, her engagement ring shining in the moonlight.
"Are you sure you still want to do this?" he asked. "I totally get it if you don't. I can turn this car right around and we'll be on our way back to Pasadena." Penny turned her head towards him. All the happiness that she'd shown merely hours ago was replaced with a quiet anger…and he couldn't blame her at all for it. If our roles were reversed, the outcome of this situation would probably be the same. Nice going, Leonard. Nice going.
"Why did you have to tell me about this girl at your job today of all days, Leonard?" she asked. "Do you know the saying 'ignorance is bliss'? I'm pretty sure that applies right here, right now."
"I'm really sorry. I just wanted there to be no secrets between us and like I said, it still bothers me. It's been bothering me." Penny shook her head, rubbing her temples. "Penny, please. Talk to me."
"Turn the car around, Leonard," she snapped. "Now. I can't do this right now."
"Get married or talk to me?"
"Both!" Penny shouted. Leonard jumped in his seat, startled by her outburst. "For god's sake, Leonard, just…don't. Please." Her voice softened to almost a whisper. "Just take us home."
"Okay…okay. I'll take us back." Leonard's heart sank in his chest and he mentally began to kick himself. This is going to be a long drive.
Sheldon was never a man of irony. Everything in his life was in homeostasis – a perfect balance that, when overthrown, would throw everything into chaos. Leonard and Penny were finally getting married after all these years. Truth be told, he was genuinely happy for them. They made each other happy…the same way he felt when he was with Amy. When they had been kissing on the couch, he'd considered expanding the parameters of Date Night and the Relationship Agreement even more.
"Well, Gollum," he said despondently, reaching into his desk and pulling out a small box. "You're an expert on rings. What do I do with this one?" He'd had it all figured out. There was something about seeing his best friend finally take that step forward with his own girlfriend that had…inspired him. Before Amy, the mere thought of being with someone – let alone marrying them – was preposterous. It was absurd. He'd never understood the excitement behind it all; he had spent most of the time at Howard and Bernadette's wedding in a state of confusion, vague happiness for his friend, and imprecise repulsion. Upon learning that Leonard and Penny had finally decided to get married, he was sincerely happy for the both of them.
Sheldon put the ring back in his desk and pulled out his cell phone, speed-dialing Leonard. His friend was probably having a better night than he was and his mind was still reeling from Amy's Skype video call.
"Sheldon, hey!" Leonard said. "What's up?"
"Have you and Penny gotten married yet?"
"Actually…we aren't getting married, Sheldon. We're on our way back home. We'll be back at the apartment in a few hours."
"You're an expert on break-ups, Leonard," Sheldon began casually, "since Penny's broken up with you and gotten back together with you so many times I've lost count of how many." Silence. "Leonard? You still there?"
"Yeah, I'm still here. And so is Penny," said Leonard dryly. "You do realize you're on Bluetooth, right? Sheldon, what's going on?"
"Amy has just ended our relationship."
"I'm so sorry, buddy. Is there anything I can do to help? Anything at all?" All hints of sarcasm in his voice were gone. Sheldon Cooper knows it all, except how to deal with break-ups. Who would've thought?
"Tell Raj and Howard to never again set me up with someone again. Online dating—and dating in general, really—you think it's the weirdest social construct, but then you meet her and she makes you kiss her, go on dates, and say I love you before she dumps you out of the blue."
"Do you think you're going to be okay for a few more hours?" Penny interjects.
"I'll be fine, Penny. I appreciate your concern," Sheldon said. "Excuse me, I need to go." He cut the connection, put his phone on his desk, and went into his bedroom, where he proceeded to curl up into a fetal ball on his bed until his friends returned home.
"Howard, can I talk to you for a second?" Bernadette asked. Stuart sat on the couch, enjoying his birthday cupcake in ignorant bliss.
"I know, we have to get rid of him!" Howard hissed once they were in the kitchen, out of his earshot. "I was just about to give him the eviction notice!" He pulled the documents out of his pocket and gave them to his wife to look at. "I know that it was bad when I was still living with my mother after we got married, but this is getting ridiculous!"
"Ridiculous?" Bernadette countered. "I feel like I'm his mother. Just give him the damned thing once the birthday glow has worn off. Happy birthday, Stuart, you're leaving! Leonard and Penny are lucky. They're having the time of their lives getting married…and Sheldon and Amy just celebrated their fifth anniversary."
"Just give it a couple hours, Bernie," he said, rubbing her arms. "I want the guy out of here just as much as you do." Bernadette eyed him warily, before sighing in defeat. She raked a hand through her hair and frustration. "Fine. I'll…wait."
"Wait, I'm getting a call from…Leonard?" Howard looked at his phone in surprise.
"Put him on speaker."
"Leonard! How'd the wedding go? I didn't think you would be back so soon."
Pause. "Yeah, we're on our way back to Pasadena even as we speak!" Leonard explained enthusiastically. A bit too enthusiastically? Howard thought to himself. "I'll see you and everyone else pretty soon. I just wanted to let you guys know we're on our way home." Before he could respond, the line went dead.
"Is it just me or did it sound like something happened?" Bernadette gave him a quizzical look.
"We should go to the apartment and wait for him," he suggested.
"You can go wait for him," his wife countered. "I'll catch up with you." She leaned up on her tiptoes and planted a small kiss on his lips. "This won't take long, I promise."
It was over. It was done. Amy stared at her blank computer monitor briefly, before she hastily closed it and shoved the laptop away from her. Dammit, Amy. She ran a hand over her face and rose from her chair. She'd known that it wasn't going to be easy breaking things off with Sheldon; what she wasn't able to guess was how much it would hurt after. Her vision blurred and she blinked rapidly. She couldn't believe that she'd actually gone through with it. Things had been going so well…and also they hadn't been going well at all.
"What the hell are you doing?" she muttered to herself. "Stop overthinking it." Her phone vibrated in her pocket. It was a text message from Bernadette: Smth went down w/ L & P. Meeting them back their apt. With Leonard and Penny? What happened? What was going on? She swung her purse over her shoulder and made for the door, swinging it open to find…
"Sheldon, what are you doing here?" Amy demanded in exasperation. "I said I needed time to think. It's only been a couple of hours."
"Surely a couple of hours is enough time to get your thoughts in order," Sheldon replied. "Where are you going?"
"…Does it matter where I'm going?" she argued. "Look, Sheldon. I really can't do this right now, nor do I want to." She briskly paced past him. "When I say I need time, I need more than a couple of hours, alright?"
"You seem awfully determined to get rid of me," he observed.
"Look, if you just have to know where I'm headed, I'm going to your place—"
"You just said that we're broken up. Boy, am I glad we're going out again!"
"I'm going to your place to help Leonard and Penny with whatever is going on with them!" Amy snapped. "We're not back together. That isn't how it works, okay?" Sheldon fell silent, taken aback by her outburst.
"Amy—"
"Don't push me on this, Sheldon. Please."
"…I'm pushing you?" he exclaimed, outraged.
"Yes!"
"How is this any different from all the times you pushed me before about intimacy in our relationship? I tried, for you! I've been trying, for you! What else do you want from me, Amy?" She forced herself to meet his eyes. Everything was hard enough as it was between them and now Sheldon was only making it harder. Every fiber in her being wanted to go back to the way things were before.
Amy couldn't bring herself to respond as she swiftly walked away from him. The walk to her car – and the drive to his apartment – was filled with a silence she didn't know how to break.
"Are you sure you have to go, Rajesh?" Emily asked. "I was hoping we could have a nice night here together."
"I need to go, Emily," said Raj. "You can come with me if you want. It sounds like everyone's going to be there. Howard, Bernadette, Sheldon, Amy…I don't know about Stuart, but—yeah, the whole gang's going to be there." Well, it's better than hanging out in the cemetery and having sex on top of people's graves. He'd come tonight with the intent of breaking things off with Emily, but he'd lost his nerve. This news with Penny and Leonard had completely thrown him for a loop. He wondered what'd happened between them.
"Yeah, yeah. Sure, I'll come with you," she said. "Do you know what's going on?"
"No. All I got was this message from Bernadette saying that everyone's meeting up at the apartment." Raj grabbed his keys and made for his car, and Emily followed close behind him.
"Maybe another time we can try to…?"
"…Sure." Raj drew the word out long and slow. Kissing the girl and telling her he loved her was definitely the way to go to end a relationship. He gave a brief shake of his head before he sparked the engine to life.
"I didn't make things weird, did I?" he asked. Please say yes, please say yes, please say yes. Emily shook her head before leaning over and planting a kiss on his cheek.
Raj closed his eyes, finding himself praying to the Hindu gods for help.
"Jesus Christ, Leonard, what the hell is your problem?" Penny shouted as they walked up the stairs to the apartment. "You don't just drop that kind of bombshell on your fiancée right before the wedding!"
"What wedding?" Leonard retorted. "There was no wedding!"
"How the hell was I supposed to be with you okay eating some other girl's face? You know what, forget it, Leonard. If you were trying to sabotage our wedding, congratulations. You destroyed our wedding day." She rolled her eyes at him in disgust before slamming the door on him. Leonard shook his head, his hands fumbling with the keys as he unlocked the door to his apartment.
"Is everything okay?" asked Howard. "We could hear you and Penny screaming at each other all the way up here."
"The wedding is off, guys," he announced. "I don't know if she even wants to give us another chance. Whatever—look, I'm tired. I'm going to go to bed. It's too late to talk about this."
Howard gave Bernadette a questioning look and Raj stared back at him, more confused than ever. What the hell was happening? Leonard and Penny may or may not have just broken their engagement, some things seemed to be going down between Howard and Bernadette, he wanted to break up with Emily, and he could've sworn he sensed tension between Sheldon and Amy. He couldn't remember being this perplexed since he and Howard investigated Sheldon's activities in the Caltech basement involving the number 43.
"Can I hang at your place for a while, Howard?" Raj asked.
"Sure. I think we have our home problems all sorted out," he answered. The group rose from their seats and left the apartment. Only Amy and Sheldon remained sitting; Sheldon in his spot, and Amy on the couch leg opposite him.
"Goodnight, Sheldon," she said briskly. She got to her feet, making for the door. Sheldon rose from his spot and had only taken a few steps when Amy suddenly turned around to face him. The physical distance between them hurt just as much as the growing drift they were experiencing.
"I never wanted to pressure you," she blurted out, "about intimacy. It hurts that you would throw that in my face, after all this time." Her voice was quiet, just barely wavering.
"…I'm sorry." Amy looked down at her feet, before storming out of the room without another word. Sheldon sunk back in his spot in sullen defeat. Amy wanted nothing to do with him now, and yet, he wanted nothing more than for her to be his wife. Where had they gone wrong?