Okay, so this is the first fanfiction I've ever written and I would just like to say that I'm not American, nor have I ever been to America so I'm not going to attempt to try and write Kyle's accent into this, just try and imagine it into your head. Also, if there are any words or phrases which are British rather than American. . . sorry, it's just what comes naturally.

Please read and review, just so I know whether or not to actually continue :) thank you

Kyle

She grinned, probably the widest in a long time as she walked out of the bedroom. Her black hair fell in ringlet curls around her shoulders and she was dressed in a pair of tight-fitting black jeans and a long top. Quite simply, she was stunning and Kyle prided himself on being able to think that without being attracted to her at all.

"You seen my leather jacket?" she asked him, frowning at the apartment, her features squishing together until she went from beautiful to merely cute.

Kyle shook his head. "Nope, not recently," he replied, "You could wear mine." She sometimes did so it wasn't a completely abnormal thing to say.

She snorted softly. "I'm going on a date, I can't turn up in some guy's jacket, what sort of impression is that going to give?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

He grinned, it had been a while since she had gone out on a date. Multiple failed relationships, the last one consisting of a cheating scumbag had not given her the best faith in men. Kyle put it mainly down to her taste, but then he couldn't really comment. His own track record wasn't the best, but that was because he couldn't bring himself to quite get over the first guy he'd ever loved. "Ooh, little Cassie's got herself a date," he got up and tweaked the end of her nose, still grinning like a fool, "No wonder you're all dressed up."

Normally she wasn't so bothered about how she looked, but tonight she was wearing make-up, another thing she didn't do on a day to day basis.

"Shut up," she said, rolling her eyes and feigning being annoyed as she walked across the room, her high heels clicking on the wooden floor.

"Sooo," Kyle said ignoring her last comment as he threw himself back down on the sofa, reclining with his arms behind his head, "What's the unfortunate guy's name?"

Cass glared at him until he apologised and changed his statement.

"I take it back," he muttered quickly, "What's the oh-so-lucky guy's name?"

"That's better," she said, giving up on finding the leather jacket and grabbing another one off the hanger by the door, "Whose is this?"

Kyle shrugged, "How am I supposed to know?"

Then again, actually, as he thought about it, he did know who's it was.

She laughed at the expression on his face, knowing him too well, but then she had known him since they were kids so he supposed that came with the territory. "Who's is it?" she asked.

"Evie's," he replied a little begrudgingly, "But don't worry, she left it here like a week ago and she won't notice you borrowed it and even if she does, she isn't going to care."

Eve didn't even live with them and she'd only left her jacket because she'd gotten so pissed with them one night she was lucky she was even dressed at all. They had nights like that sometimes, when their little group of friends would just sit in and get drunk for absolutely no reason. Of course, Cass just said it was evidence they were getting old, but Kyle tried not to think about that. They weren't even thirty yet for God's sake, that was when he was going to start worrying about things like getting too old, having grey hairs and getting a beer belly.

"Yeah," Cass replied, checking her watch and then smoothing her hands down the front of her top, "Do I look alright? He's going to be here any minute and I said I'd be downstairs waiting for him."

Kyle smiled, sincerely this time because he could see that she was genuinely nervous about her date. And he could understand those nerves, the nerves that implied you didn't have a whole lot of self-confidence. They were nerves that only came when you'd been told you weren't good enough, when you'd been let down in the past. Yes, Kyle understood those nerves completely.

"You look beautiful," he told her, "Just like always."

She smiled, that heart-warming genuinely beautiful smile that she rarely seemed to give to anyone outside of their group of friends. "Thank you," she replied, bending over the back of the sofa to plant a kiss on his cheek, "I might see you later, but don't wait up."

"I won't," he promised, then grinned wickedly, "Now, have fun and don't do anything I wouldn't do."

She snorted, "Kyle, there isn't a hell of a lot you wouldn't do."

He just shrugged, saying nothing. Just before she left though, he twisted around in his position on the sofa, remembering. "Hey Cass, what's his name?" he called after her, "I need to know who I'm hunting down if he turns out to be a dick."

From the awkward position he was in, he just managed to catch her smile. "Oliver," she replied, "His name's Oliver."

Oliver.

The name seemed to hum through Kyle's veins, practically making his blood sing. It was the memories, the memories of what it felt like to be loved that made him feel like that. It had been so long since someone had looked at him like Oliver had used to. Oliver Fish. The guy with probably THE stupidest name on the planet and also the cutest smile and most amazing blue eyes Kyle had ever seen. Oliver Fish. The guy who had broken his heart into a million tiny pieces and yet still, Kyle could not quite forget about him. It was like the guy was some sort of drug and he was well and truly addicted to him.

Kyle sighed, but that was the problem with addictions, they always came back to bite you in the ass and eventually you just had to face up to facts and get over them. And Kyle kept telling himself that eventually he would get over this, he would get over Oliver. It was just a matter of when. And a matter of whether or not he actually wanted to or not.

Oliver

Oliver chewed his lip and underneath the table knocked his fists together nervously. He felt like he was choking, constantly sipping at his water like that would ease what felt like a major blockage in his throat. Of course, it was all just in his head, he was just nervous. And with good reason, the girl sitting across from him was beautiful, he could feel other guy's envy as they looked at them, which made him want to make this work even more.

He had to make this work. He had to.

Her name was Cassandra, Cass she'd said to call her. She had no siblings, but a best friend who was basically like her brother, the same group of friends since she was a teenager and she was a primary school teacher, because she loved kids but hated teenagers. That was what he knew so far, if she'd told him anything else, he couldn't remember, but he was trying so desperately hard to remember.

"So Oliver?" Cass asked, smiling at him a little nervously, maybe feeling the awkwardness that was starting to settle between them, he didn't know, "What college did you go to?"

Now that was a relatively easy question as long as he didn't let his mind linger too much on college. That road only led to pain and regret on his part. "I went to LU," he replied, "Then went to the Police Academy."

She smiled again, but he didn't know how real a smile it was. "I had friends who went there," she said, "LU I mean, not the Police Academy." Oliver could have been wrong, but he thought she seemed really nervous. He didn't know her well enough to tell. He knew some things about her now, but not a lot, he knew she was beautiful and he also knew he never would have had the courage to even talk to her, let alone ask her out if he hadn't been slightly tipsy at the time though.

That fact hadn't seemed to bother her too much though, or maybe she just hadn't noticed.

"What about you?" he asked, following the obvious trend for conversation, "Where did you go?"

"I went to England," she said, toying with the straw that was stuck in her Coke and looking up at him through thick lashes. Oliver remembered someone else who had used to look up at him like that, through their lashes, like they were trying to hide behind them. He shook himself out of that train of thought before he could start remembering the sultry look on that person's face as they'd looked at him, before he remembered their kiss and their smile. That had been a long time ago. He shouldn't be remembering anymore.

It surprised him a little that she'd gone to England, but he didn't know why. "Why England?" he asked, "You not like any colleges around here, or did you just want something different?"

She shrugged. "I don't know, I guess so," she said, "I'd always wanted to go to England, but it wasn't until we were starting to apply to colleges that I realised that I had been in the same place with the same friends for all of my life, I sort of wanted to see what sort of person I could be away from all that was familiar." She frowned a little and the expression on her face was adorable, even he could see that. "Does that make sense?"

In fact, it made perfect sense. Running away from everything that was familiar and that seemed right and trying to reinvent yourself. That was something he felt like he had been doing for his entire life. He'd moved away from home to go to college just to escape the almost strangling confines of his parents and now he was trying frantically to run away from everything that had happened in college.

"Yeah," he replied, "It does actually, so what was England like?"

"Rainy," she said after a moment of considering it, "But it was good, different from here."

He smiled, she seemed to relax as she remembered her college days. He just wished he could do that when he did the same. "How do you mean?" he asked her eventually, actually finding himself interested in the conversation, interested in her and that was good. It was a new progression to previous dates he had been on, but it was good. Definitely good.

Cass shrugged. "I don't really know," she replied, "It just was."

He didn't really know what to reply to that, so Oliver took the opportunity to take a decent mouthful of his drink. Cass had only ordered a coke, but needing to calm himself down a little, he had had a beer. She hadn't complained at all.

"You ever been to England?" she asked after the waitress set their main course down in front of them.

Oliver shook his head, "No, never really had the chance, my life's just been a series of steps with no breaks in between." He'd gone from high school to college, from college to the police academy and then on into the force. He hadn't really had time to just kick back and relax, going on holiday and doing things like other people normally did. And not only because he didn't have anybody to do it with. The idea of relaxing, of having nothing to do but lie there and think scared him, because he knew what he would inevitably start thinking about.

"You should go," she said, "It's a good experience."

"I'll put it on my list of things to do," he said light-heartedly, but in his head he was registering the difference between this date and the past. Oliver didn't like to talk as he ate. He never had. He liked to talk before and after food, but while he was eating he just wanted to focus on doing that. And he thought maybe it was just girls, but they didn't seem to shut up, especially when food was in front of them. His brain instantly started reminding him of the one person who had amicably sat in silence with him as they ate, not liking to speak during that time either.

Oliver wondered if stabbing himself with the fork in his hand would stop the memories that flickered behind his eyelids every time he blinked, playing like a film reel that was on loop. He didn't know how to stop them and the worst part was, he wasn't sure that he wanted to.

"Good," she said, smiling before allowing them to eat in silence for a little bit longer, "Where's home by the way, can't believe I haven't asked you that yet?" She was staring at him intently, like knowing his home state was vitally important information.

"I grew up in Iowa and my parents still live there," he replied after swallowing his mouthful, "But Llanview's been my home since I moved here to go to college." Here was where all of his memories seemed to be, where his everything seemed to be and even though he wanted to run from it, he couldn't bring himself to leave either. "What about you?" he asked, knowing she was expecting the question, "Where's home?"

She sipped at her drink before speaking, as though she had to prepare herself. "Well it was never really home, but I'm from the South, North Carolina to be exact," she told him, "But like you, Llanview's my home now and I wouldn't have it any other way."

"Do you miss it?" he asked, "North Carolina?"

Dark brown eyes met his and the accompanying smile was beautiful. "I miss the food a little," he admitted, "But Ollie, how could I ever want to be anywhere else when everything I need is right here." He leant in and pressed his mouth to Oliver's in a gentle, sweet kiss.

It was difficult, but Oliver shook away the memories, stamping them down and hoping that this time he'd succeed in locking them away for good.

"Sometimes a little," she admitted and he was thankful that he managed to tune into what she was saying just in time, "But all the people that mattered moved with me to here and I don't exactly have much family to miss."

He nodded, he could understand in a way. Or at least, he could remember someone else being in almost exactly the same situation. "You know what they say," he muttered after a minute, feeling like he needed to say something more, "Home is where the heart is."

He just wished he knew where his heart was, because he wasn't so sure anymore.

Kyle

Despite his best efforts, Kyle was still awake when Cass came home. He heard the front door open and without even thinking about it slipped out of bed to greet her. He leant against the doorjamb, just watching her silently, taking in the happy smile and the love struck glitter in her eyes. He hadn't seen her this happy in a long time.

"So I'm guessing the date went well."

She jumped a little when he spoke, obviously not expecting him to be awake. It wasn't late, but Kyle was a medical student, he tended to sleep whenever he wasn't studying or working. "Yeah, it was really great," she said, smiling at him as she hung Eve's jacket back up on the peg, "I know I shouldn't say this quite this early, but I really like him."

He smiled back, pleased for her. Pleased one of them was happy. "Then don't let anything ruin it," he said, pressing a kiss to her temple as she leant into him, "You deserve the one good guy in the world." She rested her forehead against his in that way they always seemed to do, it was their comfort position. "Of course," he added when they threatened to remain like that all night, "If he turned out to be even a little bit gay, I'd steal him from you in a heartbeat."

She laughed, pulling away and tossing a sultry look over her shoulder as she went to her room that would have any straight guy falling to their knees before her. "Well sorry to disappoint you, babe," she said, not sounding sorry at all, "But this one definitely isn't gay."

He pretended to be disappointed. "Well darn it!"

Their combined laughter still seemed to ring around the apartment even after they retreated into their own rooms. Kyle knew that he may not have had the love of his life anymore, but he definitely still had his best friend.