Title: Mistress
Author: JaporAngel, aka okiegal2005, aka mdkeep19
Rating: T
Character(s) and/or Pairing(s): Nameless OC

Disclaimer: George Lucas owns the Star Wars universe/galaxy, not me.

She beckoned him, her voice easing his unfaithful mind, and he found it easy, so easy, to give in to her. He had forsaken his marriage to be with her, to serve her, to meet her every command. He was her slave, obedient to her simply because there was no other way to give in to the deepest desires of his heart.

He stayed with her because she gave him what he needed: A partner. A path. Forgiveness. For he knew that there was no absolution for his crimes in his former way of life, with the Jedi. There was only judgment there, judgment because he had broken the commitment he had made to them. Betrayed them with her, and if he was ever to leave her, they would not accept him back.

So he pretended that he loved her, and that he was on equal ground with her. He lied to himself by saying that she did not imprison him. He gave in, and each time he did, his desire for her only came back stronger than before.

It was a lust for blood and flesh that he could not satisfy. He fooled himself into believing that she could.

But she only brought more unsated desire.

Sometimes, he remembered the temple. He remembered when he was a youngling, and his dreams of saving an entire planet from forces of evil when he became a Jedi Master. He remembered his own Master, and wondered where he was now, and if he missed him at all. He remembered his knighting ceremony, when he had sworn an oath to uphold the Jedi Code.

And he had tried. But she had just been too strong to resist.

At first, he ignored the whispers in his ear as he went out into that first battle. They were whispers of fear. Of anger. Of hate. He wondered where those emotions were coming from. Then he understood.

They were his.

The whispers grew into screams as the battle intensified – he saw his comrades, his brothers, fall to the barbarians they were fighting. And he could not squelch the rage budding inside of him as she offered him comfort, if only he would do what she asked.

His duty to protect the innocent was unimportant; all that mattered was justice, and her urges for him to take revenge.

So he did.

He killed them – the defenseless and the warriors alike. Some had begged for mercy, for the status of prisoner of war, only to be silenced by the hot plasma that was his blade. Blue. Tranquil. Like the sea, and the sky. Like the Jedi.

Unlike the lava that had pulsed through his veins.

Then came the guilt. It was brought on by the realization that he had crossed a line that should have never been crossed. Words crossed his mind, names that described him. Criminal. Murderer.

Adulterer.

For that was what he was now. He had pledged loyalty to the ideals of the Jedi, of the light side of the Force, only to turn away at the sound of her sweet, deceptive voice.

He had buried that transgression deep within him, but she would come back. He didn't know at the time that she would keep coming, giving him his fill of whatever he wanted. She was no fling; this was a long-term affair that he was powerless to stop.

He left the Jedi, hoping to appease the guilt he felt while keeping his lover.

He was not prepared for the loneliness he felt, living alone in a Coruscant apartment. He would long for a wife, children, anyone to keep him company. That was when she was there for him, and he hated and loved her for it.

She was Darkness, and she would never leave him.