I am in a metal cage when I wake, at first I think I'm just so dizzy the ground feels like its moving but then I realize that the ground really is moving. I bolt upright and look up to see the ceiling closing in very fast, I close my eyes and brace myself.
Light, bright sunlight. I hear voices of various boys. A loud clanking noise. The chatter stops, I look up, squinting past the sun to see the outline of a blonde boy with arched eyebrows. He blinks a few times and stares down at me. I scurry backwards, the metal grate hitting my spine.
"It's a girl!" I hear a voice shout from behind him. Multiple heads peer into my cage to look at me. The blonde boy leans over the opening of the cage and sticks an arm down, holding his hand out towards me.
"Hey- greenie-welcome to The Glade." I take a step backwards.
"Don't you want out of there?" He shakes his hand a little bit. I reach forward and grasp it, the sweat on my arm making it difficult. He uses his other hand to grab my arm and pull me out with a grunt. I land on the top of the grate. I look around. Dozens of boys surround me, most not looking much older than me. They take steps towards me. My heart starts to pound and suddenly I run.
"We got another runner!" I hear one shout. I sprint across the large field, my vision getting hazy. My body coated in a film of sweat. I run faster. I see an enormous concrete wall, an opening into a concrete area that goes around a corner. I near the entrance. I hear someone scream, "No! Don't go in there!"
I run past the entrance, immediately a chill goes up my spine. I turn the first corner I see and slam into something hard. I hit the ground with a thud, seeing stars.
"What the-" I hear a boys voice say. I sit up quickly and see a boy sitting on the ground across from me, rubbing his forehead. His eyes meet mine. He has brown eyes, dark brown hair that sticks to his forehead from sweat. I scurry backwards.
"Woah-woah wait!" He sticks his hand out motioning for me to stop. I stop.
"What are you doing out here?"
I do not respond. He blinks a few times, as if he's unsure I'm even real.
"I-I'm Thomas." He says. "I am Abby." I reply. My mouth speaking before my brain can comprehend what I can say.
"Where did you come from?" He says, slowly climbing to his feet without taking his eyes off of me. He sticks a hand out to me. I stare at it for a moment. I reach out and grab it, he swiftly pulls me to my feet. I smell musk and sweat off of him, I quickly back away realizing the proximity between us. He is more than a head taller than me.
"The Glade?" I say, unsure of myself.
"I see." He replies, rubbing the back of his neck with a hand.
"Well, let's get you back." He walks in the direction of the corner I just turned around. I do not follow, he glances back at me.
"Trust me, you do not want to spend the night in here." I stare at his face, looking for any sign of betrayal. I decide to follow. I stay close to him as we near the entrance back into The Glade. A group of boys have gathered. I see an Asian boy trail behind us, he must have been far behind. We walk through them, they all whisper and chatter about me. We keep walking until we stop in front of a black boy and a small blonde boy.
The black boy takes a step towards me, reaching out his hand, I take a step back.
"Don't touch me." I warn quietly.
"Hey, it's ok!" The blonde boy says. He takes a step towards me as well, Thomas moves to the side.
"She said her name is Abby." He says to the black boy. The blonde boy gets closer to me.
"You have nothing to be afraid of, we're all stuck here just like you. Do you remember anything?" He is a foot away from me, he reaches out and touches his hand to my arm. I look down at his hand, then back up at him. His facial expression looks concerned and caring. I feel suddenly irritated he has the guts to touch me. I swiftly grab his arm and swing him around, kicking his feet out from under him and slamming him onto the grass. I sit on his chest and pin his arms down with my knees. He looks shocked, and struggles to catch his breath.
"Didn't I say not to touch me?" I say leaning down, my face inches from his. I feel his breathe against my face. I feel strong arms picking me up.
"Take her to the slammer." The black boy says. I struggle against three other boys the entire way there, they throw me into a hole in the ground with a strong bamboo grate covering the exit. The grate slams behind me. I kick at it for a long time but it will not budge, I exhaust myself completely.
I wake up startled to a soft voice.
"Abby?" I look up and see the blonde boy, just barely able to make out his features in the moonlight. I hear loud voices in the distance. I crawl to the grate closer to him.
"You can come out now if you promise not to attack anyone."
"Okay." I reply quietly. He opens the grate and I crawl out. We walk over to a large group of boys over by a campfire. I now notice that Newt walks with a limp.
"My name is Newt." The blonde boy says. "This is Gally, the one who let you out of the lift." He motions towards the blonde boy with arched eyebrows. He raises an eyebrow at me and walks away. "He's not the friendliest of Gladers." Newt says to me with a smile.
"You don't talk much, do you?" He says. I notice most of the boys have silenced and started to stare at me.
"Sorry about them, they haven't seen a girl in a long time. Well, I guess I haven't either."
A boy hands Newt a jar with some sort of liquid inside. Newt takes a small sip. He notices me staring at him.
"You want some?"
"What is it?" I reply, taking the jar from him.
"We call it mash. Don't-" I start to pour the liquid down my throat, it burns but I am so thirsty I hardly care. Before I can finish the jar Newt jerks it out of my hands. "-drink too much" He finishes. I notice many of the boys look at me wide-eyed.
"What?" I say looking around at them. I suddenly feel much lighter. My vision turns. I feel drunk-could I actually be drunk? I stummble to the side and someone grabs my shoulders catching me. I look up and see Newt.
"Are you ok?" He says looking down at me concerned. I steady myself and try to meet his eyes but can't seem to focus.
"Of course I'm ok-" I slur my words. Newt shifts his weight. I reach out and grab his arm to steady myself. I turn to walk away, I turn too fast and suddenly find myself falling, I grab on to Newt but he is too surprised to catch me, and falls down with me. I land on top of him hard. He groans in pain. He tries to sit up but I grab his shoulders and push him back down, I move my face inches from his. He locks eyes with me, and his cheeks grow red.
"How long has it been exactly since you've seen a girl?" I whisper. He looks off to the side and nibbles on his lip.
"How cute." I smile. He looks back at me, his face getting even redder. I suddenly feel arms lifting me up.
"Newt, put her in a bed please!" The black boy says says as he helps Newt to his feet.
Newt leads me to a near-by hut, I stumble the entire way. My stomach feels warm. He wraps an arm around my waist when I almost trip, his fingertips brushing the bare skin under my shirt. I think to myself how long its been since I've been this drunk and I suddenly realize, I can't remember. I can't remember any of my old life. Newt pushes open the door to the hut and leads me to a small bed. He sets me down so I am sitting on it. As he pulls his arm away from my waist I jerk forward and grab his wrist roughly, yanking him towards me. He stummbles and stops so he is leaning in front of my face. His eyes grow wide. I move my face inches from his.
"What are you-" He stops as my lips graze his jaw. I reach up and wrap my arms around his neck, he freezes in place.
"I always get like this when I drink, I remember that. I want it. I want you." I whisper. He stays frozen in place for a moment before sitting up, my arms drop to my sides.
He stares at me, his face red.
"I-I can't-" He starts to say. I flop over on the bed.
"It's ok, just go." I say, my mind starting to clear a bit. He stares at me for a while longer.
I turn my head to look at him. He opens his mouth like he's going to say something but quickly turns around and leaves instead.
The next day the black boy comes in and gives me a gardening job. He introduces himself as "Alby."
"If you're not hungover anyways." He says.
"I'm not." I reply, standing up out of bed and stretching.
"I'd love a change of clothes though." I say to him. He looks down at his feet then back up at me.
"I don't think we have any uh-" He stares at me weirdly. "Girl clothes." I can't help but laugh at his odd behavior. How long have these boys been away from the outside world? I realize my tank-top is sticking to me, I realize how uncomfortable I am from the heat.
"Theres a little creek that we all bathe in." He says.
"It's in the woods, you can rinse off your clothes there and get cleaned up. I can show you-" I nod my head.
"I can find it myself, just point me in the direction."
I finally find the creek, I peel my clothes off and sit in the water in my underwear and bra. The cool stream feeling very refreshing. I hear a twig crack and I look up to see Newt covered in sweat nearing the creek. He walks over and sticks his hands in, splashing water on his face. He stands up and pulls his shirt off. I stare at his muscular torso for a moment.
"Hello." I say clearly. He jumps at my voice and falls backwards, landing on his butt.
"You're- you're-" His eyes grow wide and I feel him looking me up and down. I stand up out of the water and put on my wet clothes. He stares at me the entire time.
"You boys really are depraved aren't you." I say irritated. He looks down at the river then looks back up at me irritated.
"I'm depraved? Do you even remember what you said last night?" He clamps his jaw shut as if he regrets what he just said.
"I remember exactly what I said." I say, my eyes daggers. He looks surprised. "I said I want you."
His jaw drops. I pull at my shirt, trying to wring out some of the water. "What do you mean?" He says slowly.
"You know what I mean." I retort quickly. I look him up and down one last time before walking away.
I go to my gardening job when Newt later shows up, we work silently together for a while. He gets up and limps over to grab something. I sit up and wipe the sweat off my forehead.
"Newt, can I ask you something?" I say, setting down the small shovel I was working with. He turns and looks at me, pushing some of the hair stuck to his forehead away. "Why do you walk like that?" I regret the question immediately when his eyes fall downwards and he takes a deep breath.
"Just an accident." He says briefly before returning to his work.
Later that night everyone hangs out around the fire again. I keep trying to remember bits and pieces from my old life and failing. I start to get frustrated. I notice a jar of mash being passed around again. I quietly slip over and grab the jar of mash, quickly concealing it. I am sitting for a while, taking sips here and there before I notice Newt starting to ask about where it is. I feel myself sway back and forth a little. He notices me and walks over, sitting down next to me. He holds his hand out.
"Give it here." He says plainly.
"I don't know what you're talking about." I say, hiccuping after my setence. I stare at his blue eyes and stone expression. I hand him the jar. He holds it up in the light.
"Jesus, you drank more than half!" He says frustrated. I shift closer to him.
"Drink the other half." I suggest. He stares at me weirdly.
"I'd rather not be wasted, thanks." He mummbles. I look at him with my best sad face. He sighs deeply.
"Bottoms up." He grunts, tipping the jar back. I watch him gulp down the last of the liquid, he drops the jar on the grass and stares at the fire for a moment. He fidgets with his hands for a while and cracks his knuckles a few times. He turns and looks at me.
"I jumped." He says plainly. I am confused for a moment.
"Off the wall. I didn't want to be here any more." He stares down at the grass. I try to think of the words to say but I can't come up with anything. I reach for his arm and graze my fingertips up from his wrist to his elbow. He stays staring at the grass. I put my fingers on his jaw and rotate his head to look at me. His deep blue eyes look pained. I flatten my palm against his neck and move my face closer to his. His expression softens, he looks at my lips. I move away from him and stand up, stummbling briefly. He looks up at me. I look down at him. He stands up quickly and walks past me across the field. I glance around, nobody is watching us. I follow him for a while until we reach a hut, he goes inside and slams the door. I knock.
"Please go away." I hear him say quietly.
"I can't." I reply. He opens the door and glares at me, looking irritated. I stride forward and wrap my arms around his neck, he stummbles backwards looking at me surprised. He wraps an arm around my waist to catch me. I move upward on my toes, pushing myself against him. His breath hitches. I press my lips against his. He freezes in place. My body feels hot against his. I feel his arm release me and he steps away, looking off to the side and blushing hard.
"What?" I say, trying to catch my breath. I feel chills go up my spine as he looks up at me.
"What do you want from me exactly?" He says quietly. I take a step towards him. "I don't want anything from you." I reply. He raises an eyebrow at me. "I just want you." His face grew instantly red, he put his hands up defensively.
"Wait what?! What do you mean? You can't be serious!" He shook his head hard. I smiled at his flustered state. I took another step towards him, his hands dropped to his sides and he stared down at me.
"You don't want me back?" I say, frowning slightly.
"Thats not-" He started to say. I moved so we were inches apart. He looked down as I looked up, our faces only inches apart. He quickly looked the other way, shutting his eyes.
"I uh-"
I got on my toes, moving my face next to his neck. I ran my finger tips up his arm slowly, and let out a deep sigh against the skin of his neck. He cocked his head to the side, giving me better access.
"Um-"
I softly pressed my lips against his neck, planting a line of kisses upwards, stopping on a spot that when I kissed he let out a short hitched breath. I softly stuck out my tongue, licking the spot. I heard a groan in his chest. I kissed down his neck a little, snaking my finger tips up the hemline of his shirt. I bit softly on his neck, I could hear his heart beat pounding. I moved my hands up his stomach, lifting the shirt along with them. I moved away from his neck and he lifted his arms, allowing me to slip off his shirt.
"Abby-please-" He whispered. I moved my eyes along his torso, biting my lip softly.
I put my hands on his shoulders, gentely leading him backwards. He tripped on the bed behind him and landed on it sitting. I drew my legs up on to the bed and sat on his lap.
"Please stop-" He said almost too quiet for me to hear. I ran my hands up both his arms slowly, feeling goosebumps errupt on every inch of his skin I touch. His eyes travel down my face to my lips, he instictively licks his own.
"Do you really want me to stop?" I mummble, suddenly grinding my hips downwards onto him. He lets out a panting breath and his jaw clamps shut. I feel his erection through his jeans. I move my hands up his arms to his shoulders, squeezing them lightly. I feel his muscles flinch as I grind my hips down onto him again. He shuts one eye in a wince. I move my hands up his shoulders to his neck, tracing my thumbs across his jawline. I feel his body shudder at the contact. I move my face closer to his, close enough I feel his shallow breaths on my lips.
"Kiss me." I whisper. He hesitates for a moment then moves his head forward slowly, his warm soft lips pressing against mine. He softly reaches a tongue out, tracing my lower lip. I part my mouth and greet his tongue with my own. We move our tongues together gentely for a while when he reaches up and flattens his hands on my hips. I'm suddenly very aware of the hotness between my legs. I grind my hips against him softly, feeling his erection press against me just right, I let out a soft sigh. His long fingers move under my shirt, the contact of his fingers tracing against my skin drives me crazy, I feel a throb between my legs. He lifts my shirt and moves away from kissing me. I raise my arms so he can pull it off, he discards it on the floor. He reaches up, roughly grasping my breasts. I find myself nearly shaking in anticipation. He grabs the middle of my bra and rips it open. I gasp and jump at the sudden roughness. The bra slides off my arms and to the floor. He looks at my body with an expression I can only describe as hungry, raw, desire. He suddenly grabs me, roughly swinging me around so I am laying on the bed. His weight presses on top of me and he sternly grabs my legs, shoving them apart and positioning himself so his erection is pressing between my legs. A groan escapes my lips. I feel a carnal need for my pants to be off, his pants to be off, I reach forward and grasp his belt, he grabs my wrists and slams them down on the bed roughly.
"No. You have to wait." He says sternly. The way his voice reverberates in my chest makes the spot between my legs throb once more. My breath hitches. He roughly nudges my head to the side, immediately biting a spot on my neck that seemed ridiculously sensitive. I bite my lip, stifling a groan. He trails wet kisses down my neck, down my chest, between my breasts. I feel my legs wrapping around him without even thinking about it. He suddenly catches a sensitive nipple between his teeth and I moan loudly, quickly clapping my hand over my mouth. I feel him smirk against my skin.
He stops and looks at me, pressing his finger against his lips.
"Shhh." He whispers, smirking at me. I gulp and nod my head in understanding. He dips down again, roughly grazing his tongue against my nipple. I arch my back, pushing myself against his mouth. He pushes his hips down on mine, forcing me flat on the bed. He kisses a trail across my chest to the other nipple, sucking softly. I whimper, squirming against him. I tighten my legs around him, grinding myself against him hard. His mouth releases my nipple and he exhales hard. I grab the sides of his face and pull him upwards. He looks into my eyes and I bite my lip, looking back at him. He suddenly smiles, his smile turning into a laugh.
"What?" I say confused, my vice-like grip with my legs loosening. He shakes his head.
"I just never pictured anything like this ever happening in my life. I thought it was over." His smile fades. His eyes fall and he sits up, sitting on the bed. I sit up as well.
"I don't feel so well. Maybe you should go." He says quietly. I reach forward and touch his shoulder. He turns around and looks at me with sad eyes. My hand retracts.
"Okay. I understand." I say standing up. I slip on my shirt and eye the ripped bra on the ground.
"Sorry- about that-" He says softly. I smile at him and quickly shuffle out of the hut.
I went back to my hut, the warmness still present between my legs. I laid on my bed, squirming uncomfortably trying to sleep.