Yea, this is another Gilmore Girls Songfic, with one of Josh's songs. It's from Dean's POV. Even though I don't like Dean for Rory, I thought this song might fit for him.

I can't tell you enough how I feel about her. I envy her, admire her, and more importantly, love her. I go through my days not knowing what to do if I see her. How to act, or react around her is beyond me. I burn through most of my brain cells trying to keep cool. My heart speeds up when I'm around her; I tend to go crazy thinking there'd be some possible way she could hear it pounding out of my chest. Of course that would be impossible, but then again, you would think that a girl like her was impossible, too.

Let me understate how I adore,

How I admire and more,

And walk a hole in the floor,

Like a fast freight train screamin' through the dark,

Making a penny in my heart,

And that's just where it starts,

I've tried to get over her, but I can't help but think breaking up with Rory was a bad idea. So what if Jess liked her, it didn't mean she felt the same. It sure looked like it, but maybe I drove her to him. All I really know is, I don't think I'll be fine without her. I keep hoping she'll come back, but hope has gotten me nowhere.

My lonely nights turn to days,

My lonely days turn to how my life is going,

Endless, helpless hoping,

I can dream if I can believe,

But you're the only one, who can heal this heart that's broken,

Endless, helpless, hoping

I've even written countless letters telling her how I felt, and most importantly, that I'm sorry. I've never gathered up the courage to send any of them, and if I did, what would she do? I doubt she'd leave her 'Mr. Perfect' for me. For now, they fill the space of my desk, mismatched and out of order. Sort of like me. Besides, it's hard enough trying to be friends with her; everything is sort of awkward between us. If I tell her how I feel, that could wreck everything we've worked to hard to achieve. For now, I just let her be with him.

All the words I write just don't impress,

They don't leave my desk,

And like me it's a mess,

I try to tell you but you tell me that you're my friend,

How could I let that end?

So I just let you love him

I keep waiting. But for what? Something that may never come. Something I wish, something I dream for. And I know, until, if, it ever comes, I'll be here alone. Rejecting others for her, when she'll never love me like she did.

Now I know how a widow staring at the sea feels,
Waiting for a ship to come home,
Waiting there,

All alone

I sit here in my room, thinking of her like usual. It's funny how she can affect me like this. When we were together, it was like my world was brightened, I could see things with a new light. Now that I've lost her, I see what a big mistake I've made. I should never have been so protective. I should have trusted her, have appreciated her more. All I have now is Endless, Helpless, Hoping.

My lonely nights turn to days,
my lonely days turn to how my life is going,
Endless, helpless, hoping,
I can dream and I can believe,
But you're the only one who can heal this heart that's broken,
Endless, helpless, hoping